Anxiety & Work & Life - Anxiety Message Board

qwerty1970 · 07-21-2005, 10:09 PM

It seems that anxiety and it's symptoms are sort of mythological with the public. You say you simply can't handle something at work because you have terrible anxiety and panic attacks and they just act like you're faking some sort of exotic disease that no one really suffers from & you're just a slacker. They act like it's some sort of personality thing that can be overcome if you just try hard enough. Obviously you're just a loser and can't run with the pack. Ok, I can't run with the pack, I'm a lone wolf, but I can tell you what you shouldn't do because I've been an observer for more years than I'd like to admit. I have anxiety and it's symptoms but I think most of my symptoms come from pent up anger that noone will listen even when I do say something relevant. Fight or flight. I'd rather run away than smack these idiots.
They'd rather listen to the vocal people who spout off and say nothing rather than the quiet ones who only say something when it's truly important. I really don't understand this world. It's a complete case of missing the point entirely. I punched my monitor this week because a person we support kept giving me grief after I had explained the situation several times. I was so ready to walk out because of that and several other problems but I would take it as a personal failure. My fiance keeps telling me to just quit, but it's good $ and I don't understand either but I would take it as a failure (society & my family would deem it as such). I am so confused and depressed because I really don't like this world at all. I kind of wish I would have been born in the 50's when my parents should have had me, rather than the 70's. My life would have been a choice of homemaker or career woman. I would have chosen homemaker but now that is a something just seen on TV Land (Edith Bunker complains of not having a purpose and I think "Lady you don't know how bad it can get with a "career" - think of trying to please an office of people and doing a week's worth of housework on the weekends) or for those lucky to have high earning husbands. It's a privilege, not a choice. Every day I drive to work and can't help making snide comments to myself about the people I see just walking around the streets and not having to go to a place they dread, hate, loathe - especially housewives and SAHMs. I don't hate them, I envy them. I would be happy to only have to please my husband and kids and not 40+ people in my office. Anxiety would still be a problem but it wouldn't threaten my existence and reputation as it does now. Some people just aren't made for this...Some days I wish I could just march in and give my resignation but that would require a confrontation of sorts.
Meds may have calmed me just a little but they haven't changed my mind yet...
Sorry for the rant.

Jitterygal · 07-22-2005, 09:23 AM

Hey, get it out--I have to do that sometimes...I had a terrible job like yours last year, and I DID walk out!!! That took a step of faith, considering I didn't have a job waiting on me and I needed the income. But the people there acted like they were in high school, and I couldn't take it any longer...Things have improved greatly since then--I found another job with none of that junk to put up with everyday...maybe the same can happen for you. And vent anytime you need to--that is part of why these boards are here!!!

Jitterygal

t_411 · 07-23-2005, 10:02 PM

I agree, it's great to vent! if you bottle it up and don't get it out then you'll expolde on someone (maybe someone at home who don't deserve it). I know I've done that before and then feel aweful about it. The boards have helped me by being able to vent with people who "understand" what it's like. Anxiety & panic sucks!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wish I could take it from myself and everyone else in the world and send it straight to hell where it belongs!!!!
Maybe we should all just get together and scream our brains out in the streets for an hour or so once in a while to express our frustration to the world who does not feel this and does not understand or seem to care. We have to deal with them so, they should have to deal with us. I hate being belittled or looked down on because of having this! Part of me just wants to grab them and ring their neck out like a wet rag! BUT, I resist and just toss it in the trash can that now lives inside my mind due to all of this.
Life goes on, we go on... who knows what tomorrow will hold. Every time I get excited about someone or something or make plans this anxiety surfaces and tried to ruin it. Is anyone else out there exausted from dealing with this? I am! But to hell with. I'm still going to live my life and follow through with my plans.

Jitterygal · 07-27-2005, 02:27 PM

I have found that is the best approach--to go on with life as if your anxiety isn't there...it's extremely tough, but I think it helps you because you realize you CAN do things and enjoy some things in life...no sense in staying home like a hermit and missing out!!!

So I just do the best I can and don't care what others think--if they think I'm not being "social" enough, that's their problem!!! My husband is so understanding, and he will take the hint if we are out at a social gathering and I'm not feeling up to snuff...He'll tell everybody we've got errands to run, or it's getting late, or something that doesn't make me look like the bad guy. I feel blessed to have him...

Jitterygal

mjewell · 07-27-2005, 03:30 PM

I hear you, I feel the same way, especially about the people that have the option of staying home, seeing people during a normal weekday casually walking around downtown shopping, going to the lake etc. It infuriates me. This is terrible, but I have a friend who's life is so seemingly perfect I can't even frickin stand to talk to her. I haven't emailed her back in over a week because I just cannot handle listening to her perfect life story anymore. I know she doesn't mean to, but all i hear when I talk to her is her husband is so ambitious and loving and make so much money and she could stay home if she wanted but she doesn't because her work is fulfilling and she's so good at it and blah blah lah on and on and on until i want to PUNCH HER IN THE FACE!!!! Lol, ok, so your post brought out some animosity in me too.

Just know I feel the same way!!