Am I going mad? Feeling pulse.... - Anxiety Message Board

Tauri79 · 09-12-2005, 12:00 PM

Hi,

A newbie here. Not to boards in general but certainly this one!

I am hoping to get some feedback or maybe just to know I'm not alone. I have suffered from anxiety in the past. It was a few years ago when I had an underlying undiagnosed disease (glandular fever) and it was awful. I experienced panic attacks and generlised anxiety, which worse far worse than the condition itself.

Just recently I have been unwell again. I've been investigated for all kinds of conditions from pancreatitis to an aneursym and they have finally decided the pain I have been suffering might well be gastric reflux. I hope so, I know this condition is totally treatable and a far better option than some of the other ideas! THing is, I'm getting the anxiety all over again and I really don't want to go through this. It took me nearly two years to recover last time.

I know that I have had dozens of tests that have all been negative and I am currently awaiting a endoscopy. But even with the doctors assurances I can't seem to shake the feeling that there is something seriously wrong with me. I *know* it's stupid, but even so.

More than this, and I hope I don't sound too mad, I keep getting this horrible feeling of anxiety and becoming aware of my pulse within my body. i.e. stomach, neck etc. It's horrible. A horrible feeling. Obviously I know having a pulse is good! But this feeling is just weird. I can't seem to get away from it. I've had my stomach artery checked by ultrasound so I know it's ok. But even so. Do I sound crazy? Oy has anyone else had this feeling associated with anxiety before?

I'd appreciate any feedback and thank you for reading my ramblings!

XXX

lindsalou · 09-12-2005, 12:24 PM

I sometimes get that feeling in my neck, where i can feel my pulse. Its weird if i look in the mirror i swear i can see it pulsating, my heart seems to pound in my head too! I get a weird sensation in my stomach that i can only discribe as having done 100 sit-ups (when i havent) and then being put through a washing machine on spin. Yes, sounds crazy too but sometime i swear i can feel something moving about in my tum, like a crazy heartbeat. So no, your not alone with these weird feelings, and seen as youve been checked out physically it sounds like good old anxiety. hope this helps

Tauri79 · 09-12-2005, 12:31 PM

lindsalou - Thank you so much for replying. I think sometimes healthboards can make me feel worse(!!!!), but sometimes it nice to find someone who has experienced something similar. I'm sure my life would be so much better if I could just take the doctors at their word and believe I'm fine.

Nights are worse. Does anyone find that? I just lie there listening to the sound of my heart/pulse and find it impossible to just relax and go to sleep.

Dani Girl 78 · 09-12-2005, 01:24 PM

I notice a "pulse" too. Sometimes it's so loud in my head that I can't think. I never really notice it at night though. I also feel it in my chest and in my stomache and the whole looking in the mirror thing...I thought I was the only that could see my pulse. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one.

I've never been to a doctor about anxiety, I'm thinking that maybe I should.

SRMom · 09-12-2005, 01:42 PM

Tauri79:

Hi and welcome...sorry you're here (you know what I mean?), but glad to have you.

I had the same problem with noticing my heartbeat too much. It seemed so strong and hard I thought something must be wrong. Then I got anxious about it and started having palpitations so bad, I thought I was having a heart attack (I was not). My doctor said some people are just overly sensitive to their heart beating. She gave me a beta-blocker (Atenolol) and it helped me tremendously. I no longer felt like my heart was a ticking time bomb. I'm not surprised either to hear you have reflux. That was another problem I had, for which my doctor gave me Zantac 150. My underlying anxiety has caused me many problems, all of which I've had checked out. That actually sets my mind at ease and now I know I just need to try to control my anxiety. I take Xanax as-needed for my panic attacks.

You don't sound crazy, you sound like you are worried, sick, and in distress. All of us with this problem have to go through many phases of worry and wonder to realize we're okay, except for the anxiety. Good luck with your endoscopy and I hope you can find some answers here that will help you.