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Old 09-12-2005, 04:24 PM   #1
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Hi Everyone

I was just wondering if everyone would write a little about themselves and their experience with anxiety and depression, panic etc. I think this would help me and likely several others. Would love to know how long youve dealt with this, symptoms, if it comes and goes or is a constant, what kinda meds you have tried and what worked and what didnt. Do you fear for your health (like me) or is it financial worries, family worries, etc. I would really appreciate it if we could get this thread up and running and gaining steam. Thanks to all of you guys, I do come here often and always leave feeling much better than when I got here. Peace(of mind)to you all!!!!

 
Old 09-12-2005, 04:57 PM   #2
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Re: Hi Everyone

hi
I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder 12 years ago.I fainted with seizure activity and then loads of physical anxiety symptoms followed for an entire year it was daily.I was tested for all kind of things everything comming out normal,during all this I thought I had a brain tumor and obsessed over this.I was borderline agoraphobic.Finaly I just started taking baby steps without meds or therapy and got through it and felt mostly good for about 5 to 6 years and then it hit me again.The anxiety attacks were comming back and I fainted again 4 more times in a 2 yr period and had loads of physical symptoms again some new some old and of course mental symptoms.
This time I told myself something had to be done I couldnt keep up with my kids and I just wasnt able to do my daily things.I went to my doctor and got meds and got better again.I had to wean off the meds during my last pregnancy and I stayed off up until a month ago the anxiety came back once again this time it was obsessing over heart palpitations I started having when laying in bed so I have had a heart holter monitor and waiting for the results.I suspect it may come back fine. I had one done yrs back because of the fainting along with an ekg,eeg,mri,blood work.........I dont want anyone to worry about fainting though please it is rare to happen from anxiety.I was told from a few doctor it is due to the anxiety and stress.As I said though I dont want to frighten anyone into thinking it will happen to them because chances are it never will.
This has been a ruff road for me ,but I am grateful that it does come and go for me instead of never ending.I have months to years of almost no anxiety at all and thank God for the meds! they help me to pick myself up again also deep breathing sometimes helps.

here is a list of the symptoms I can remember right now:
anxiousness
derealization (feeling in a dream/things not real)
feeling drunk or drugged up
dizziness/lightheadedness
sharp pains that move around (usualy the left side of my body)
chest pain/preassure
palpitations
hot flushy
sweaty
apprehention
shallow breathing
shaking
upset stomach
clenching teeth
nausea sensation in mouth
tensed muscles
moodines
obsessing over my health (searching the net and thinking the worst)never believeing the doctors
constipation/diarhea
ringing in ears
headaches
fainting (very sick after with alot of the other symptoms i listed)
thinking everyone dislikes me or is watching me
weakness/sleepiness


im sure I have missed some symptoms,but these are the ones that stick out in my mind the most.I am now taking Lexapro 10 mg in the am's and Lorazepam (Ativan) 0.5 mg as needed ,which I usualy take one every night before bed or I notice heart palps and hot flushing ,anxiousness and cant sleep.Some of my symptoms are due to stress,but I think anxiety and stress go hand and hand.

positive self talk and therapy,self helps books,keeping busy,exercise,and meds if needed all help.I havent been in therapy because I usualy do not have health insurance.

thanks for making this thread and taking the time to read my post

good luck to everyone with getting better.........Beth

 
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Old 09-12-2005, 09:09 PM   #3
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Re: Hi Everyone

excellent post! hopefully we can get a few more people to tell us a little bit about themselves as well. I would like for this to be a place where I can go back to when these anxiety attacks strike. they have been cycling lately and im only just recently trying to get a handle on when and how they seem to strike. being able to look back at a "central" location for help, and advice would be very helpful. we all know how much it helps to know someone is going thru or has gone thru the same thing you haved or that someone has experienced the same symptoms as you have so that you know it is "only anxiety" and it is not cancer or a brain tumor or MS or als or any number of other diseases we have been sure that we have. SO please anyone and everyone reply to my silly thread. Thanks again everyone .

 
Old 09-13-2005, 12:50 PM   #4
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Re: Hi Everyone

come on , please? I could really use some help getting thru this episode

 
Old 09-13-2005, 01:10 PM   #5
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Re: Hi Everyone

I have been fighting anxiety and depression for about 6 years, i know why i suffer anxiety i just dont know how to convince myself i'm ok now, when i get anxiety i feel hot and sick, then i feel like i need to poo, if i dont i get severe stomache cramps and go dizzy, some times i would get toothache and pass out, but it was never really toothache, just a symptom of my anxiety. I think of all the bad things i have done and think of all the bad that has been done to me, i get sad over what has happened then determined to carry on.
Sometimes, (most nights) i wake throughout the night then feel pants in the morning, i get depressed that somedays i cant even take my daughter to school.
Anxiety is a personal thing and although we all have similar symptoms and experiences we all deal with different things differently.
Make mental notes of when you feel different and when you are having an attack ask yourself why, and find something that will help you through it if you cant get over it!!
So far i have found that nothing helps me in the morning until i walk out my door, it becomes catch 22 when i feel so ill i cant get dressed let alone walk out the door!! Distraction only helps me sometimes, but when it does its great.Anyway wrote far more than i intended.
Good luck

 
Old 09-13-2005, 01:31 PM   #6
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Re: Hi Everyone

This post is probably as valuable as paying a counselor $100/hr..to just be able to talk about all that has led us up to where we are today.. I come from a family of 9 children..Father died suddenly of heart attack at age 45, I was oldest at home, tried to save him..TOUGH ! He was my hero..five years later my oldest brother was hit by a car and suffered brain damage, died..(he was coming to visit me)..I always took on the "mother", taking care roll..THEN I got married !!! I started having panic attacks probably about 20 yrs. ago, was in a bad marriage, worked 3 jobs trying to manage for our 2 sons..husband was a farmer but not real motivated..lots of bills, bankruptcy, forclosures, etc. Sons were humiliated, hurt ! Husband even took out loans in oldest sons' name, didn't pay it, sold his cow herd, cashed in their life ins. policies.."tried" to have an affair with my sister, said he did, she said they didn't.. I adored, loved my husband but began the panic attacks, knew I was having heart attack..he made fun of me and would tell our sons that "mom is doing her thing"..went to Drs., had tests and they told me it was my husband causing all of my problems..after 27 yrs. of this I divorced..he stalked me, scared me to death for 3 yrs..he then married his counselor..BUT he still calls to this day...I have dizziness, chest tightness, poor balance, eyes will get to where they don't focus right..scared to even go out sometimes for fear of something happening..HAVE to work so MAKE myself come to work (thank God for a wonderful boss)..I did get better while taking my prozac and zanex faithfully but quit prozac 2 yrs. ago and just started back on prozac weekly yesterday..back to same old thing !!! Sorry this is so long and know my list of symptoms don't begin to cover all but those are the worst ones..Thanks to all for the love and support..without support and my faith in God I don't know what I'd be today..

 
Old 09-13-2005, 02:13 PM   #7
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Re: Hi Everyone

What a great post! Well my anxiety started almost 9 months ago back in December. My daughter was just about to turn one year old, we had just moved into a new apartment in a new area of town and Christmas was only a few days away. I was doing some last minute shopping with my husband and daughter and out of nowhere things started to go black and I felt hot, had palpitations and shortness of breath. Felt like I was going to pass out and needed to get out of there. I sat down for a second and it went away but I felt very jittery. Made husband go pay for our items while I went to the bathroom and took off my jacket and took deep breaths.

From that moment I was in a constant panic mode for about a month. I went to the ER days later and they found nothing, didn't even mention anxiety and/or panic. Went to see my GP several times and he sent me to a cardiologist, had tests done....everything normal. Went to an ENT, everythig normal there. So this GP kept telling me it was anxiety and all in my head. He threatened numerous times to send me to psych.

I found a new doctor who ordered tests and turns out I had gallstones. Had my gallbladder removed in April and 95% of my chest and back pains went away. The anxiety is still with me and I still deal with it on a daily basis. I try not to let it stop me from doing things. Since December Iv'e gone on a family trip to Disney World, out of town to my parents house at least 5 or 6 times, went to a football game over the weekend and push myself as much as I can. Some days are harder than others.

I still have a hard time driving. In Jan. I was taking my daughter to a peds appt. and I started to have another panic attack - everything went black, palps, chest pain, shortness of breath, ect. Ever since I've been terrified of driving especially with her in the car with me. My therapist is working with me on that though and he's been great.
I go to therapy weekly, have the Anxiety and Phobia Workbook and take Xanax twice daily. Xanax has been a lifesaver for me even though I hate taking it. I've tried SSRI's but didn't like them.

I would give anything to have my carefree life back. Its so hard being home alone with my daughter everyday while husband is at work. I always think soemthing will happen to me and she'll be left alone. I've thought I've had heart attacks, stroke, brain tumors, ect. You name it, I think I've had it!

I do have an inner ear problem which was just recently discovered and that could be whats causing the black out episodes (which I never actually pass out) and the anxiety/panic. I hope to get rid of this someday as its a horrible thing to live with but I'm told it does get better.

Sorry for such a long post, just wanted to share my experience!
I look forward to reading others....

 
Old 09-13-2005, 07:59 PM   #8
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Re: Hi Everyone

thanks so far to everyone who has contributed to this post. many more are welcome . I also look forward to read all that you have to say and please dont apologize for long posts, say whats on your mind we can all take something away from each and every word. thanks once again and keep em coming!

 
Old 09-15-2005, 06:09 AM   #9
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Smile Re: Hi Everyone

i havent given up hope that this thread will contiune to grow even tho its been a few days since the last post. I thought for sure hry33 would come to my rescue like he(she) always does. Come on drop me a line , all are welcome

 
Old 09-15-2005, 10:29 AM   #10
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Re: Hi Everyone

Hello all..I've suffered from anxiety for as long as i can remember.When i was about 12 i started having this little "attacks" as i use to call them, where i would feel sick to my stomach, my heart would race, i would start to sweat and then out of nowhere they would stop just as quickly as they came on. I was scared to bring it up to my parents because i never wanted to go to the doc. So after a few years of having these little "attacks" i figured they were not life threatening since i was still alive and slowly started to forget about them. Then when i started my first year of high school i started having them daily before school and they would usually last for a couple of hours then for the rest of the school day i would be fine. Well to make a long story short they finally went away(except for the occasional attack) until about 2 years ago. My girlfriends dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer and was given only months to live so her and i spent alot of time at the hospital with him up until the very end. Seeing someones body give up on them so quickly and watching him detiorate really put my health anxiety in full swing(and also seeing the pain and suffering he went through really scared the crap out of me because i realized that that could be me someday). After he died my girlfriend was an emotional wreck(as anyone would be) and i tried my best to deal with the emotional rollercoaster she was on the best i could. Our relationship probably hit more highs and lows the months after his death then it has the 4years we've been together. On top of that her brother asked me to quit my job and come work the family business to help them out. I said yes since it was the least i could do. So i left a great job as a waiter at a country club to working for a family business making half of what i was before and some weeks not even being able to collect my paycheck due to financial problems. Thats when my anxiety started up again. I started having attacks in class, at work and just about everywhere else. I suddenly became a 24hour stress case; when i wasnt having an anxiety attack i was worrying about having one and as all of you know what kind vicious cycle that is. After suffering from these attacks for about a year i noticed that i started to feel like crap all the time among other symptoms. I started getting dizzy out of nowhere which then made me afraid to drive or go anywhere because i was afraid of getting dizzy and passing in a public place. So my life was put on hold for about a year; i hardly left the house except to go to school and work(which was extremely difficult) and at the same time managing to keep this a secret from my mom and girlfriend. Well fast forward about 6 months; I went to the doc. to find out what the heck was wrong with me(after 10 years lol) and he confirmed that it was anxiety. He put me on paxil and xanax(neither of which i have taken because i want to try to do this on my own). I refuse to take the paxil because of all the negative things ive heard about it and will eventually take the xanax when i really need it. I've been exercising, eating better and doing yoga which have all helped alot. I'm going out alot more then i was last year at this time, and im trying to gather the courage to fly to idaho to see my dad(which will be a big step). I still have panick attacks, but they are becoming less frequent and less severe then they were before. I'm only 22 and refuse to let this take control of my life. I have so many things i want to do and see and i dont want to let my own mind keep me prisoner from doing those things. Its a long process to actually overcome this but i know one day i will be able to live my life the way i want to be living it. Sorry for the long post, I'm now late for my study group, lol. Thanks for listening!

 
Old 09-15-2005, 11:06 AM   #11
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Re: Hi Everyone

Hello Everyone,

I have a request.
Since this thread seems to inspire some long posts...which is fine ...I'd like to ask that you please try to break your posts up into paragraphs when at all possible.
That makes it much easier for other posters...and me ...to read.

Thanks for your understanding.

Ms_Mod

 
Old 09-15-2005, 11:40 AM   #12
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Re: Hi Everyone

Hello Hello.

I've always been anxious, neurotic, etc... But it was always just a quirk. Three years ago I had my first "real" panic attack and ever since then my life has been consumed with "what-if" scenerios. For a couple months I'll be incredibly obsessive, then that will stop and I'll be afraid to leave my house, then maybe I'll move on to some other fun trigger.

I recently (this past week) finally took the dive and went on medication; zoloft. i had been resisting drugs for over 3 years, but my quality of life has not been getting any better and it's time to try it. I have been doing CBT for over a year and it has helped, but it hasnt really gotten me over the hump.

So here is to continued success. You people (whether you know it or not) have been incredibly helpful and inspirational...

Eric

 
Old 09-16-2005, 08:34 AM   #13
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Re: Hi Everyone

I agree totally Eric about the posts being so helpful, to me it is like free CBT. I love to check back to this sight and see that someone has replied to a post. It is therapeutic reading the similarities that we have all shared . The hardest part for me since this all started has been determining whether the symptoms I experience on a daily basis are in fact "just anxiety" (as if that werent bad enough) or if it is something "more serious" . Can anyone relate to that. That is my fear. I have had test upon test upon test revealing nothing but still fear the worst. What do you guys think? Hope this wasnt too long Msmod...lol...thanks for listening all

 
Old 09-16-2005, 10:07 AM   #14
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Re: Hi Everyone

I can totally relate to wondering if this is "just anxiety" or something "more serious". I think of that almost daily. I'm only 24 and have had a very thorough check-up as well and my doctors always tells me the same thing..."you're a very anxious young lady..." lol. He's very nice about it and I'll believe him for a day or two and then go back to thinking that maybe he's missing something. Its very frustrating, and you're definitely not alone!!

 
Old 09-16-2005, 11:49 AM   #15
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Wink Re: Hi Everyone

JKDR1: Oh yes, can TOTALLY understand what you are saying regarding "is this my anxiety" or is something serious medical thing happening to me..Worry about that alot but also know after so many years of dealing with this, all the tests (ALOT) that I have to believe it is the anxiety or I would live at a hospital/drs. office..Thanks for all the posts, helps me and many going through this so much....

 
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