to litten
I have been like you and I know how you feel
as well as meds, we all need to learn new ways of relaxing and calming ourselves, msot of us breathe the wrong way do try to breathe deep and slow when tense or anxious it always helps, also relax your muscles, dont tense up or fight back, just accept whatever happens
beta blockers are of some help but arent a magic cure, the dose can be adjusted to suit how you feel, ask doc.
getting xanax or any benzo is becoming more difficult, does doc think you are a drug addict who needs xanax because of running out of drugs? offer to take a drug screen test to show that you arent, ask doc to prescribe an antihistamine tranquilliser
you may benefit from an antidepressant med, these can help both with depression and anxiety
a good doc should talk back and reassure you but some docs just sit there and listen