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Old 03-15-2006, 12:13 PM   #1
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why does this happen?

When I am in the company of some people I feel relaxed and friendly, but with some people I have a feeling of unease and timidness, as if they mean harm. This happens even when I dont know the person well enough to be able to judge their character, It's as if I have a phsycic sense that kicks in and tells me 'This person should not be trusted'. There are some people I have worked with for nearly 4 years and I cant click with them, I feel anxious to the point of nausea and I clam up and can barely get a conversation going when I'm with them. Does anyone else experience the same feelings?

 
Old 03-15-2006, 12:22 PM   #2
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Re: why does this happen?

Yes...I feel that way. I think some people we have a sense about because they aren't warm and friendly...they make us keep our guard up, but when it happens out of the blue...I think that is more because there is already a heightened state of anxiety because of other issues. I think us anxiety sufferers have much more sensitive feelings than other people...a blessing and a curse.

Last edited by SRMom; 03-15-2006 at 12:23 PM.

 
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Old 03-15-2006, 12:26 PM   #3
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Re: why does this happen?

I do for me its not that I feel certain people are out to harm me it is just that with certain people for whatever reason I feel intimidated so I say few or no words to them.With others I can talk up a storm and very easily start a conversation.I do understand the trust thing though alot of times I will purposely just sit and listen to new people just to get a feel for them like the type of person they are then I cant decide to talk with them or not.

I dont know maybe the fear of talking to certain people is a type of social anxiety?

 
Old 03-15-2006, 01:47 PM   #4
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Re: why does this happen?

I get those feeling also. I get vibes off of people and sometimes never learn to trust them no matter what. Even if they don't do anything to give me reason not to. Its funny that you say that. I have this gaurd that I put up and some get by and some don't. There is nothing wrong with that. Its protecting yourself.

 
Old 03-16-2006, 12:39 PM   #5
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Re: why does this happen?

Thankyou all for your replies. I find that I get these feelings especially if I sense the person has an arrogance about them. I suppose it's my feelings of inferiority about myself that's to blame, and people like this have more chance of highlighting it.

 
Old 03-16-2006, 12:46 PM   #6
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Re: why does this happen?

It might help to try to remember that most arrogant people behave that way because they are masking their own insecurities. I try to put myself in others' shoes, trying to have empathy for them, has helped me so much to be able to communicate without fear. I try to look at young people as if they were my children, people my age as if they are just as insecure as I am, and I try to treat elderly people as if they are my mother, grandmother, etc. If other people seem too short-tempered with me, I think, maybe they have a sick relative and they can't think about my feelings today. Stuff like that. I hope that helps someone.

Last edited by SRMom; 03-16-2006 at 12:47 PM.

 
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