Afraid to take my meds??? Ridiculous but true. - Anxiety Message Board

Eliza1234 · 07-11-2006, 07:03 PM

Ok so I finally sought help for occasional anxiety/panic attacks.

My problems only occur a couple of times a month... doc gave me Klonopin and Ativan to take as needed. (Well, he wanted me to take one or the other every single day but I decided to take only when needed.)

The problem? When I start to feel anxious and think about taking a pill... I am terrified to take anything! I have a huge fear of feeling "out of control" or feeling like I am "on something". I also am horribly afraid that I will have a bad reaction or OD and die... perhaps I have some allergy to the medication, or perhaps the side effects will hit me hard.

So now I have 2 full bottles of 2 different anti-anxiety meds... and I still have the anxiety! Haven't had a full-on panic attack yet, just some heart palpitations, nervousness but I went straight to bed and made myself fall asleep so that it didn't escalate.

Jeezum I know this is ridiculous but has anyone experienced this? I am all for taking these meds as needed...when I'm feeling fine. But then when the time comes and I am feeling anxious, I get too scared to take them! What is my problem?

confused32 · 07-11-2006, 07:50 PM

You could be my twin. I am the same way when it comes to medicines. I had only taken tylenol up till about 6 years ago my doctor put me on metoporlol a beta blocker to help with my palps and blood pressure. It took me 2 weeks to get up enough nerve to take it but the palps were so bad i gave in to see if it would help and it did with no major side effects. I will only take amoxicillian for an antibiotic cause ive taken it since i was little and know i wont have any effects from it. In March i had a severe anxiety attack over my health anxiety thinking i was having a heart attack, ended up at the ER they gave me some ativan to help relax me i got the script filled but didnt take any. Two weeks later i ended up at the ER again same reason, they kept me over nite and gave me ativan by IV and some other drugs which scared me to death but i was so scared anyway i thought what the heck if it will save me then ok. They did several test all showed my heart is fine. I dont believe the test i think they are missing something cause i still have issues that i think are due to a blockage in my heart. I do take the ativan if i get really stressed and worried about it but ONLY because they gave it to me at the hospital and i didnt have a reaction so now i will take it. They gave me 2 different anti-depressants, they both still sit in my medicine cabinet, i refuse to take them due to the side effects. My doctor recently put me back on my toporol xl for the palps coming back i dont mind taking it but she also gave me zocor for my cholesterol, im a nervous wreck about taking it and havent started it yet. I am debating on having a heart cath done to finally rule out if i have a blockage or not, they said i dont have to have it done but since my symptoms are still here they will agree to it and maybe to ease my mind, i want it done BUT it scares me that i will be the 1 in 100 that has a serious problem from it. I worry about everything that has to do with my health, its a horrible feeling to live like this everyday. I like you go to bed so i can just sleep through the pains and problems, sleeping is the only time i dont worry and i feel good, i had to go to bed the other nite at 7pm cause i felt an anxiety attack coming on due to some chest pains i was having. So yes i know exactly how you feel and i even go to an anxiety group to try to help with my problem but so far its not doing much good. To ease your mind the ativan really isnt bad at all, for me anyway. I have .5mg tablets and i usually cut it in half and take that before bed or if i get to feeling really anxious about a symptom im having. They just kinda relax me. Just be careful cause from what ive read they are very addicting, i was taking it everyday for a couple of weeks but decided i didnt want to keep doing that so now i just take it as needed.

Ruby13 · 07-11-2006, 10:34 PM

I was/am the the same way. I don't even like to take cold medicine!

When I started Buspar, it took me 5 days to get up the nerve. I made my fiance stay in with me to watch a movie. Fortunately, even when I felt the side effects, it really isn't bad. My friend's wife had the same fear with Ativan. He said it was very mild--she was alert and had normal thoughts, just didn't get worked up.

If you have a friend you can keep around the first time to keep an eye on you, that's probably a good start.

anonymouswreck · 07-12-2006, 02:12 AM

I know!!!!!!! I'm the same way!!! I'm absolutely terrified of taking new medicines because I don't know the way they're going to affect my body. But you know what? There's a simple motto you can remember: If it doesn't make you feel good: then stop.

V_dubgurl · 07-12-2006, 05:30 AM

ME TOO!! I won't still to this day even take advil! Im not sure why this is. I also have a huge fear of losing control or getting messed up. I won't drink either. I hate it cause I used to like an occasional drink or night out. Wonder how we can all overcome this fear?