I think I'm going crazy - Anxiety Message Board

eggysbrain · 08-07-2006, 04:51 PM

I cant stop worrying about stupid, ridiculous things. Its all to do with work and I cant even put my finger on what they are. I worry about my hours, my wages, have I upset my boss etc and thats just what I'm thinking of right now!
I burst into tears at work two days in a row, everyone keeps telling me to chill out but its hard- they think I'm too sensitive and take nasty customners etc too personally. I know I do but its like I cant shake the stressful feeling. My boss kept telling me "relax, let it go" and I just kept crying. then she said "you cant keep coming in and crying, thats no good, you dont want to be doing a job that makes you this upset-are you sure you even want to be working here?" I know she didnt mean it in a nasty way but then I started freaking out that I upset her, was going to get fired, ALL kinds of crazy things, even though I know shes stressed out at the moment and probably just had to vent- I know that shes only human.
If I try to apologise for being miserable people just say "OMG dont worry about it, stop, its not a big deal!" Then I worry that I'm annoying everyone!

I feel like I'm falling apart. The doctor gave me birth control pills which I swear are making me weepier and more miserable than usual- I never used to be like this.
I dont even know what point I'm trying to make anymore. I just need someone to reassure me. thanks.

lylone · 08-07-2006, 05:11 PM

Does your company have an Employee Assistance Program number you can call? If so, I would use it and call it if I was in your situation. They will listen to your worries and fears and might be able to give you a referral to a social worker or physicitrist who can help you deal with your anxiety. It was a free service with my job and my medical coverage does pay for 20 visits a year. most companies have this and if your does... use it. It is part of your benefits!
I felt stupid and dumb calling the first time, but I am so glad I did. After 3 weeks of sessions and a little xanax help along the way, mine is teaching me ways to calm down and take some time for myself out of everyday to reflect on the days events and try to make those events less stressful. She believes that I have had anxiety for over 10 years and finally hit the breaking point and you may have too.
Hormones in birth control helped me out, and they should help you. I would definately call the EAP though if you company has one.

good luck,
lyl