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Old 09-01-2006, 08:36 AM   #1
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Sarah20 HB User
Despair

Im 20 years old and feel total despair...I think im going mad. This is my story.It all started about a month ago I was perfectly happy , not a worry in the world sitting down watching the tv, I began to feel a pressure in my head and dismissed it as tiredness as i had been out the night before.. Then half an hour later i got up to get a drink and when i stood up i got really dizzy and felt like i needed air... i went outside and my mam came home..i felt like something was seriously wrong my mam told me to go lie down but i was shaking and felt numb all night...she slept beside me as i was so afraid...The next day i woke up and i felt fine...my mother had booked a doctor\'s appt. but i thought ill go but i feel ok, then about an hr before the appointment i had no worries or anything and i began to feel it again like just a general feeling of being weak and unwell.I went to doctor who took blood tests and said everything seemed ok but if i felt so bad go to a&e and get immediate blood test results. So thats what i did...they kept me in overnight..said everything was fine and sent me home. I was ok for a day or two and then at night time it began again only worse...i had to sleep in my parents room, i felt a tightness across my chest and i felt really unwell...this went on for 3 nights..Then i went into work one day and i was so weak i cudnt work...i went back down to a&e ..this time they kept me in for 4 days...i felt so weak in hospital but they did every test, checked my glands, my heart, my bloods were fine..everything came back ok...but i still felt bad...They said i was having anxiety attacks and gave me xanax 5.0mg ive been taken them since...they take away some of the feeling but not all..I feel so hopeless like im not going to get over this....Do u think there is something seriously wrong with me? How can anxiety make me feel this bad?I feel so alone and hopeless right now...no one knows how i feel. Please help and offer some advice id really really appreciate it...i feel sick with worry about everything and everyone..my family, my friends...its like i cant escape...Please help...Im going into third year in college and i can\'t cope with this.

 
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Old 09-04-2006, 10:53 PM   #2
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blu3crayon HB User
Re: Despair

Well, How can anxiety make you feel so bad? If I recall correctly its simply because its effects your CNS which in turn effects everything.. non-life threatening just very scary and uncomfortable.

I am sure if you work at it you will get past it.. now that you have had all the tests my best advice is ( and I should take it myself heh) trust your body. I have had the feelings of weakness .. numbess all over my body .. headaches .. chest pains you name it really. Infact I have convinced myself many times things have been wrong when they turn out to be either mild to nothing or just plan perfectly fine. Once I even managed to convince myself I had ms.

If all of your dr's have said "look your fine go home its anxiety" then I cant say much more then that to reassure you.. but anxiety wont kill you trust me ive had it my entire life (and diganosed for 7 years )

So hang in there and let us know how you are doing.

-Blu3

Btw I am also 20 and about to start my 2nd year at college.

Last edited by blu3crayon; 09-04-2006 at 10:54 PM.

 
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Old 09-05-2006, 06:48 AM   #3
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Re: Despair

Well, You mentioned that you were fine and no worries yet you still had an anxiety attack. It sounds to me like you could have some stressful event in your past that you never entirely 'accepted'(Sorry if it brings back bad memories). I think that is what brought mine on because I basically had the same thing as you not a worry in the world and then out of no where I feel horrible.

All of those symptoms you describe definately sound like anxiety attacks and this has already been stated but it can in no way kill you - No one has EVER died from one. Perhaps the first step to recovery is completely accepting the symptoms as being anxiety and I mean without a doubt. That is what many here are still working on total acceptance since it basically makes you into a hypcondriac (myself included). One thing I recommend you completely stay away from is looking up diseases since it will just make you think you have that when you don't - The doctors already tested you!

Worrying about the symptoms are just going to make them worse because anxiety attacks are basically caused by worrying (stress related stuff). Now that may sound impossible but you have to remember they cannot hurt you and I'm not sure if you have had the feeling like you were going to pass out but I have had probably 30 or so attacks and I have never passed out so nothing to worry about there.

Another step in recovery is not to let in control you. Do the things you want to do which doesn't necessarily mean spend all day with a friend you could go spend an hour or so with them. At first it will be hard to be away from home and not think about anxiety but it will get better as you do it trust me. Also even when you have the chest tightness and stuff try to sleep in your own bed, at worst go and watch tv for a while until the symptoms go away because as you stay away from places due to anxiety attacks you mind will get the thought of 'I have to stay away from here or I will have an anxiety attack'. Which is 100% false unless you decide to worry about it but as stated before you have no reason to.

Truthfully you are one of the lucky ones since you have only had it for a month and have admitted the problem it is. There are people here that have it for many monthes and\or years before they admit it! Since you have admitted your problem so early in it I guarentee you will be able to make a quick recovery. I had mine for 2 monthes and I went from having anxiety attacks just about every day to none in 3 weeks (besides I still have a little chest tightness but it doesn't bother me anymore).

To answer the few last questions -

Do u think there is something seriously wrong with me? Nope just anxiety

How can anxiety make me feel this bad? The magic powers of anxiety I suppose it can do pretty amazing things to the body can't it?

I feel so alone and hopeless right now...no one knows how i feel. - Trust me your not alone there are probably hundreds here and many hundreds of thousands in the world with it.

Last few things that might help are exercise (relieves stress), and eating health (relieves stress and makes you more confident, or so I believe)

Sorry for the very long post but I saw you have only had it a month and I know you can recovery from it so I wanted to give you a lot of information so it will make it as easy as possible, any more questions just ask - I promise not to make a huge post about it.

 
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Old 09-06-2006, 04:47 PM   #4
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SusanGene HB User
Re: Despair

I am so sorry this is happening to you; especially one so young! You mentioned worrying about everything. Know what I think? I think you're traveling down the wrong road FOR YOU in life. It's like you're doing things to please other people but they aren't the right things FOR YOU to be doing.
This causes tremendous stress and involves denial. If your subconscious mind starts telling you, "hey; try something different." the guilt and conflict are too much for your CNS to handle and this is how it's reacting.
My advice is to search your soul and live your life the way you want to; and avoid anyone who pressures you to do differently.
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