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Old 09-21-2006, 11:16 AM   #1
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langy HB User
anxiety and fears worse since losing my dad

i lost my dad a few weeks ago and im getting confused as to what is grief and what is my anxiety. ive had g.a.d for 18 years now and its like being on a rollercoaster some years good some bad but now im scared that im going to end up as bad as when i was at my worst. i just feel im losing control and i want to scream. has anyone been through this and anyone have any advice for me. hope to hear soon thanks x

 
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Old 09-22-2006, 06:09 PM   #2
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PeskyRabbit HB User
Re: anxiety and fears worse since losing my dad

Hi Langy,

First of all, I'm very sorry about your loss. I lost my Dad in June and I had a similar experience. My anxiety, mainly health anxiety, was through the roof. My therapist explained to me that when you have really difficult times, such as the death of a loved one, your mind sometimes jumps to doing what it does best, which in our case is create worries and anxiety. It's kind of like it goes into this mode to distract you. I felt a little better when she explained it to me that way. I didn't thoroughly understand why my mind would do that to me, but just knowing that it was very common and actually kind of expected was a comfort. Please know that it does get better. It's hard enough to lose someone you love so much without having to deal with this terrible anxiety. Remember that there's no correct way to grieve. Everyone deals with loss differently. Part of the way you're dealing with it is to feel some heightened anxiety. Take care of yourself during this difficut time and have faith that your mind is doing what it needs to do to work through this. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Grieving is a process and you'll start to have better days soon.

I really hope this helps even a little.

Take Care,

PeskyRabbit

 
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Old 09-23-2006, 10:55 AM   #3
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langy HB User
Re: anxiety and fears worse since losing my dad

thank you so much i was starting to worry about my anxiety taking over again and its helpful to know that its my minds way of coping with the grief. i couldnt believe how quick it took hold again but hearing from you has given me the hope that my anxiety will start to subside eventually once my grief starts to become more bearable. your so right when you say how difficult it is to cope with grief and anxiety at the same time you start to get confused which is which. its a comfort to know that someone understands how im feeling. i hope in time that we can both get stronger and have less anxiety in our lives.thank you again for your kind words they have helped me greatly. take care of yourself langy x

 
Old 09-23-2006, 11:05 AM   #4
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langy HB User
Re: anxiety and fears worse since losing my dad

hi pesky rabbit just to say if ever you need to talk about your sad loss of your dad and any of your anxiety concerns please dont hesitate to contact me through this site thaks again for your help langy x

 
Old 09-25-2006, 02:42 PM   #5
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PeskyRabbit HB User
Re: anxiety and fears worse since losing my dad

Hi,

I'm so glad you're feeling a little better about things. Be patient with yourself, this is a really difficult time. It will get better. It's been three months since I lost my Dad and although I still have my moments, it's much better now. He had a long illness with Parkinson's Disease, so his death was very expected. The anticipatory grief helped me a little too. I can't imagine how it would be to lose a parent unexpectedly. I still miss him a lot, but I don't have this horrible anxiety and constant sadness anymore. Like I said, everyone grieves differently, so just let your grief flow...some days are better than others. I noticed that crying sometimes and just letting it out really helped. I felt better after a good cry!

Thanks for your nice offer to chat about anxiety, etc. The same goes here! Post any time! There's lots of nice people on here who are very helpful...including you! (-:

 
Old 09-25-2006, 03:57 PM   #6
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langy HB User
Re: anxiety and fears worse since losing my dad

hi pesky rabbit i do need to be patient and let time heal. my dad had leukeimia and had been given 4 months but due to his determinatoin made a year and remained very well till the last few weeks but it still came as a shock to me as wed been told we had a few more months.its good to know that it gets better and you do get calmer and the anxiety lessens.i went back to work yesterday and im finding it quite hard but i know that i have to try and do it and that in time it will get easier.i hope that you are okay. here anytime you need a chat.youve got a friend langy x

 
Old 09-26-2006, 09:12 AM   #7
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eloise_girl24 HB User
Re: anxiety and fears worse since losing my dad

what you guys are saying is so true. my dad passed away from cancer 5 years ago when i was 18. that's when my GAD started. i started getting panic attacks, generalized anxiety, depression and health anxiety. alot of my health anxiety, especially stems straight from watching my father die from cancer. when he first got sick, the doctors told him it was anxiety. it was cancer and that's what scares the hell out of me. ever since then i have been a anxiety ridden person.

 
Old 09-26-2006, 02:59 PM   #8
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langy HB User
Re: anxiety and fears worse since losing my dad

hi eloise girl24 im sorry for your loss and i totally understand about your anxiety. i got my first panic 3 years after losing my dad aged 15 then they vanished after 6 months but by 21 they were back and ive been on a rollercoaster ever since. but after losing my stepdad of 18 years ive got worse again and like you its scary. im here anytime you need a chat about your loss or your anxiety thinking of you langy x

 
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