Just Got My First "Self Improvement" Book... - Anxiety Message Board

JB68711 · 01-12-2007, 08:14 PM

I had a gift card for a book store from Christmas, and since I just finished a book that I've been reading, I decided to go and get a new book. But this time I really wanted it to be a book to help me deal with my problems, rather than escape them. Instead of looking around online and seeing what other people may suggest, I decided I'd walk into the bookstore with no book at all in mind, and just trust my instincts. I came across this book called "Self-Coaching", flipped through it and read the back... and instantly felt like I needed it. Then I saw that I grabbed the last copy, and decided I had to have it. So far I've read 2 pages, and I swear this guy is describing me to a "T". I'm going to read it, hopefully be done in a week or two... so I'll definitely update on whether or not it was worth it. Or you can just do what I did.

PeskyRabbit · 01-12-2007, 08:20 PM

That's wonderful! I bought a few books myself a couple of weeks ago. I committed this time to really following the steps and advice in them. I must say that I feel better this week than I have in a very long time. My family notices a difference too. The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook, which is like giving yourself CBT has been extremely helpful. Also, the Hope and Help for your Nerves made me feel better too. I paid for a year of therapy and never felt any different. I think it was because it was talk therapy rather than CBT, which is actually taking some action and changing your thought process.

Keep us posted on how you're doing.

tnmomofive · 01-12-2007, 09:43 PM

Well great JB....I hope the book is very helpful for you....let us know.

JB68711 · 01-13-2007, 02:56 AM

Good to hear you're doing better PeskyRabbit... I've also been going to therapy for maybe 3 or 4 months now. It really is nice to have someone to talk to about my problems every week... but at the same time, it just seems to be such a slow process. But reading the book (I'm up to page 65, chapter 6) has been really encouraging so far. It talks about insecurities and how we reinforce them and make things a habit, and that any habit can be broken. It seems to be a form of CBT also, talking about how to change your thinking patterns and stuff like that. I've been told a lot of things about anxieties and depression, "It's all about how you react to things", "It's the outcome of how you perceive things, "It's because of the way you think"... but it was always just those one liners. Now I can read something that goes in depth as to why it's because of these things, how I can change these things, and reinforce new habits in the way I think and react etc.

tnmomofive, I'll probably be done with this book in the next 3 days so I'll definitely be on here soon to let you guys know the outcome.

JB68711 · 01-29-2007, 01:22 AM

Hey... sorry it took me so long, I finished the book about a week ago. And I don't know if it would've helped a long time ago, or if I just got it at the right time... but it really has been a tremendous help to me. The book was completely relatable... he uses simple metaphors that make this overwhelming, complicated, cluster of out of control anxiety feel like nothing. The book puts the ball in your court, the control in your hands... and shows you that anxiety is nothing more than a learned habit. And that it can be broken. I wouldn't have believed it before... I'd say things like "my mind is doing this to me, I don't have control over it", but telling yourself that automatically makes you lose all control. Anxiety has it's own voice and it's own personality... once you stop feeding it, once you stop listening, anxiety can't survive.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not suddenly perfectly better. But I am so much better than I was a month ago. I'm halfway there... knowledge is half the battle, practicing it and applying it to my everyday life is the other half. This book works with CBT methods, something I've heard about and I've been hoping to find... and I'm really relieved that I finally did. It gives you techniques to train your mind... to undo reactions and re-learn more rational ways of thinking.

There have been a few times where I felt like I was slipping back. One time I felt like I was about to have a full-blown panic attack. This feeling lasted for about 30 seconds - a minute, and then gone. And everything was perfectly fine. I'm able to recover from my anxieties and fears so much faster now... and I find it so much easier to talk myself out of such negative, self destructive, anxiety feeding thoughts. It's gonna be gradual to get me perfectly fine... but I'm glad to know I'm in the right direction. I'm not gonna look back, not gonna dwell... just going to move forward and finally get on with my life. I would definitely recommend this book to anyone who is interested, or not interested for that matter.