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Old 08-17-2007, 11:12 AM   #1
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ht0626 HB User
please help..need comfort

I am not sure how a doctor would classify me, I have been treated for anxiety, panic attacks and depression- none of which helped at all I also have been dealing with OCD which is mainly where I think my depression and anxiety come from. Today I feel has been the worst of the worst as I feel so much of my life seems wasted.. anxiety and OCD have taken my life away from me it seems. I feel little to no joy over anything anymore..as if I am just simply existing so to speak.. sure I laugh, but it is always followed by tremendous tears for some reason, which scares me terribly. I often feel as though noone understands me and what I deal with daily. I feel so NOT normal and as a result inadequate.. I so wish I could do what "normal" people do and not worry about every little detail constantly. I wish I could talk to people without my heart racing and sweat dripping from every pore of my body.. Today has hit me hardest as I am 28 and realized today I am so "messed up" I cannot even deal with having an adorable puppy in my home.. It has been a week since I got her and already I feel as though I have lost it. I have been sick (stomach) all week and today dizziness set in... what does this all mean? I realized I now have to give her away which breaks my heart and what makes it worse is that I know it is because of my anxiety and OCD issues. Once again, my stupid mind will not allow me to enjoy or have something in my life I want so much... I am so terribly depressed, I just want to be normal like I used to be. I am not sure why I wrote this except that I needed to let it all out and maybe relieve some burden or to hear that others feel as I do.. any comfort that can be offered would be much appreciated... how do I deal with this? thanks..

 
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Old 08-17-2007, 12:20 PM   #2
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spurs279 HB User
Re: please help..need comfort

I think a lot people on this board, including myself, have similar feelings. I had the leave college and have been living at home for four months just trying to get better. I'm 21 and otherwise healthy but my anxiety is keeping me from living any type of normal life. I'm not even close to being well enough to live alone, go to school, or do all kinds of other things.

Have you tried talking to a psychologist or psychiatrist? That's what I'm doing now and will be starting medication soon. I was reluctant to take any medication but I realized this wasn't going to miraculously go away so I decided to take the chance. I hope things go well for you and you start feeling better.

 
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