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-   -   My story with Anxiety and depression..... (http://www.healthboards.com/boards/anxiety/626936-my-story-anxiety-depression.html)

vermeer 08-18-2008 12:25 PM

My story with Anxiety and depression.....
 
Well i dont have many people to talk to, my family are to busy to really deal with my problems.

I have been nervous ever since i was a teen. [COLOR="Red"]<REMOVED>[/COLOR]

many years later my best friend (who was always very hyper and always thinking at a million miles an hour) had a total psychotic break. he was diagnosed with bipolar skizophrenia. and i was there during the melt down it was soooooo scary.he thought i was cia,nsa and i was out to get him. he was seeing things that were not there.....

i freaked out weeks after it happened and thought i was going to get what he had. i then started thinking that i had cancer, aids, diabeties...
well i went to the doc nervous as hell, i was then given the number to a phycologist.
The phycologist really helped me, he said i will not go crazy. and that it was only anxiety. those words made me feel so much better.

now i have been going through a very stressful relationship, the girl that i fell in love with hates when i snore, talk when eating, touch her with clammy hands, gets made if i breath to loud. i am a big bodybuilder i cant control those things. she also got pregnant and had an abortion. we were not ready to have a baby. now she cries everyday saying that she killed the baby all for me. and puts major guilt on me. i still am not sure what to do in life i am an artist.
recently i have been getting intrusive thoughts, that scare me and give me anxiety, i dont feel like being in public when feeing nervous. i saw my doctor again and he told me that the thoughts are normal and that in time they will go away. those words did make me feel better. and he said that meds are not the answer.
now some days are good some are bad its a rollercoaster. i hate feeling depressed and anxiety.
my girl is returning home from work in 3 days. and i am a wreak.

will my story end with a happy ending will depression ever go away? everyone says that it will pass. i just hope they are right.


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