Anxiety with change
I have been on a presciption for my anxiety since October, however I am still having a problem coping with changes in my life. So here's the deal. I've been living alone for almost 4 years now and love it. The problem is I've been dating someone for 3 years and it's getting close to living together time. This terrifies me. I finally told him I was ready to try and now he won't becuase he's worried I will freak out, which I will and have already warned him.
He knows I will lose it becuase of my inability to even live with a cat. I love cats and sometime ago I decided to get a kitten. I had no idea I would react the way I did. I had a complete panic attack having a cat in my apartment with me and so he was givin away the next day. Now about a year after that I decided to try again. Since I had started my medication I figured I'd be ok this time. Once again, panic attack and he was takin back to the animal shelter the next day. I felt terrible for doing it and was very upset with myself. As you guys know, when you are panicing like that all you want to do is fix it right away.
Long story I know but I must get some of your guys opinions. My boyfriend wants me to learn to live with a cat before he moves in. For the last week I have been flip flopping back and forth on the idea. This morning I thought I was going to call the person on craigslist and get this kitten I've been looking at but the closer I got to doing it, the sicker I felt and the faster my heart would race. Should I go for it and force myself to get past that first panic attack? Sounds like such a stupid problem but it is very real for me. And I want to get over it.