For as long as I can remember i have had some anxiety. I am a very anxious and restless person in general but the episodes would only last a few minutes, a few times a day. It started when i was about 12 that i was concerned with dying and i felt like i couldn't breathe right. It all started when I had a flu. However I remember that after a few bad days, it went away on its own.
Ever since that i would get these anxious feelings or have trouble taking a deep breath but i would always be able to calm myself down and it would just go away for a while.
Lately however, the breathing problems have grown worse. I struggle to take a deep breath all the time and on good days i am able to achieve this by yawning or constant burping.
This week however something terrible happened. I was having an episode and i felt very sick, like i was really going to die this time. My hands were going numb and it seemed no matter what i did i couldnt take a deep breath. My feet started to go numb after so I told my mom to rush me to the Emergency Room. When i got there they told me my oxygen levels were fine and they also did an EKG and said my heart was perfect. They didnt seem too phased even though i was convinced i was dying that night. After 3 hours i still hadn't calmed down and they finally offered the lowest dosage of xanax. It was my first time taking any type of meds for anxiety and it did make me calmer, slowed down my heart rate and made me shake my legs less. However it seemed that the breathing problem was still there. I was constantly thinking about my breathing and no matter how hard i tried not to it wouldnt go away.
I come home and the past 2 days have been PURE HELL. My breathing issue seems to always be there no matter what i do. I practice my breathing, i drink hot water with a hint of honey. I watched a show, i tried a relaxation tape, i tried to read, talk to people....e.t.c Im literally losing my mind and no matter how many times i convince myself its anxiety it doesnt seem to make it any better.
Please help me i am feeling miserable, and i am at a point where i am hopeless, thinking im either going to die or that i may as well die to be set free from all these feelings. I been taking xanax in the morning because after the three hours of sleep i manage to get i wake up feeling like im having a heart attack. My throat constantly feels tight and the breathing gets worse. The xanax doesnt seem to be doing much.
I took one last night and it didnt help at all. I suffered with severe attacks from 6 pm to 3 am when i finally by miracle was able to drift off. Also i am overweight and had been on a diet 2 days prior to this. Now after these feelings my diet has become very easy to maintain and not in a good way. I have lost my appetite completely. I eat only because i have to before taking the xanax. I eat steamed chicken with veggies and drink apple juice and orange juice. i also feel discomfort in my stomach, very gassy and i would have to burp a lot. I dont know if thats from anxiety or what....
I dont know if this is just anxiety either, it doesnt seem to subside. idk what the hell to do.
i cant laugh or smile, i feel like the whole world is a giant black cloud and im stuck in it.
Please HELP ME.
Btw, im going to the doctor soon for some blood work in case i have thyroid problems or what not. I really cannot live like this, 2 days and im already losing my mind.
I go back to college soon after a month off and honestly i am scared of how im going to travel there for an hour or even sit in class.
I haven't posted here very often, but I can relate to what you are feeling. I have the same problem and have gone to the ER just like you with the same results.
I have a couple of questions that you can either just think about, or if you are comfortable with, respond to here. Please understand there are no right or wrong answers, we each react to things that are unique to ourselves.
Did the medication help you at all? Is that a treatment you think would make a difference?
How do you feel about college? College in general, the school you are attending, the area of study you are working on?
How are your relationships? With parents, other family members, classmates?
Are you dieting because it is something you want to do or feel you should do, or are doing it because someone else has suggested it, insisted on it, using guilt or fear?
Do you have short term and long term goals set up for the future? And do you enjoy and appreciate things that are happening in the present?
In addition to seeing a medical doctor, have you seen a mental health specialist? Considered one on one behavior therapy? Group therapy? Meditation? Hypnosis?
What about alternative therapies... in addition to meditation, have you tried massage, acupuncture, reiki, aromatherapy?
I'm quite a bit older than you, and have dealt with ADHD, depression, and anxiety since I was 9 and have been treated since I was 19. For the past 12 years I've also been dealing with grief issues since my daughter died.
In that time, I've learned that it usually takes more than one thing to help find your balance again. You might try medication, but if you do, consider using it only for a short time, while you investigate other treatments... I've found that talking with a psychologist on a weekly basis extremely helpful. Also meditation, massage, reiki, acupuncture and aromatherapy at the same time have made a huge difference for me. Also journaling is very helpful. With medication, I really caution people to take them for a short time.. several weeks, several months at the most. I was on anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds for 12 years and it took me four months to taper off of the anti-depressants, which causes some very uncomfortable issues all by itself. I am now working at tapering off pain meds, and it's taken me almost a year and I'm still not off of them. I am still taking Lorezapam, and now that I will have to taper off of this next. Medications are great on a temporary basis, but they are not a magic bullet.
If you are a reader, I have the titles of some books that might help you too. But do see the doctor and ask for a referral to a mental health expert. Often its hard to do this alone.
Thanks for responding. No the lowest dose of xanax didn't help. I saw a doctor and she gave me an EKG and listened to my lungs, etc and said I was fine and that anxiety is what I have.
Since I was "fine" physically I went to a psychiatrist and he said I have severe anxiety as well. He said he noticed how anxious I was, even talking to him. He prescribed a bunch. Gabapentin! I refuse to take that three times a day! He prescribed the antidepressant lexapro and I take that once a day in very small dose. (I don't want to become hooked on these!) he also suggested I take lorazepam in the morning and at night to feel calmer.
I have been taking lexapro and lorazepam and they seemed to make me less depressed but the whole annoying breathing thing I still bothering me. It won't go away! What I hate the most is the fact that I can't seem to fall asleep due to it despite taking lorazepam to sedate me. -.- I'm so frustrated because I been coping with it for a whole week and all I can think about is when it will go away and if it ever will go away.
I know I have been taking very low dosages of my MEds but the thought of taking so many MEds freaks me out so I don't want to. It seems this anxiety ridden time period is impossible to escape. It's either u take the MEds and they don't work, ur scared to take the MEds, u take them and worry about being hooked on them, and then if you don't take them the constant fear of not being treated (leading to worse anxiety) is there.
I just want to go back to the days where I can fall into my bed and embrace it while being nice and sleepy, being allowed to sleep and feeling comfy. Now I can't seem to relax no matter how tired I feel and I just want this to go away. I think this is the worst condition a person could have especially if you feel you can't breathe in deep. I just want a normal life back, I'm not asking for anything ever again besides the gift of being able to breathe normally and fall asleep.
To answer your questions : school wasn't that stressful. Sure I had finals but I received my grades soon and they were good. I have been off for a month so no reason to feel stressed out! I don't love school but I think my College is pretty decent and the idea of going back isn't too overwhelming. I'm studying English and psychology (ironically enough) but its my first year so it's not too much.
My home life is good too, my parents take care of me and try to be as supportive as possible about my anxiety....
As far as losing weight, I want to for my health and other ppl encourage me to.
I don't know why I am so full of anxiety, it's so disturbing to feel so uncomfortable and not know why.
I don't know what makes me feel so distressed. It's that feeling of not being able to take a deep breath that drives me crazy. Even when I'm calm and neutral it comes back. I went out for walks and it was still there, just that I wasn't hyperventilating. Ugh I'm so frustrated it always makes me feel paranoid about hyperventilating or dyingg. It makes me feel abnormal and like I can never put my guard down.
I'm going to start exercising and doing stuff to exhaust myself so I can hopefully get rid of it and start sleeping again. Idk what else to say. I feel like therapy won't help, talking about it just reminds me.