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Old 09-23-2011, 11:21 AM   #1
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SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!!

Hi - I finally received my hearing date of October 13. Just the date 13th freaks me out. The wait has been exhausting to say the least. I already feel beaten down before I even get in there. Disabled 4/2010, filed 6/2010, denied 12/2010, appealed (w/lawyer) 12/2010, hearing scheduled 10/2011. I did write to my senator and my congressman and 2 weeks later I had a hearing date. I do think that helped. I am still scared to death for the hearing. Praying alot.

I find it interesting as I read all of the Boards that in todays medical community, they cannot find a cure or better treatment for what I have and what many of you also have: DDD, DJD, Spinal Stenosis, Bulging Discs, Facet Arthropathy, arthritis etc. These days I can barely walk, or stand for that matter for more than a few minutes. I seriously can't even stand in the kitchen and have a conversation with my husband without feeling like I am going to faint in pain. Sitting is out of the question unless I am leaning on one side. I also find it interesting when some of the doctors look at me and wonder why I am in so much pain - don't you want to just smack them right in the face!!!! I would like to know the answer to that question myself, thank you!! Thank God I have doctors backing me up since 2009. I have had 3 steriod epidural shots, 3 rounds of PT and nothing has helped me. I have been to 3 surgeons, 2 neurologists, 1 neurosurgeon, 1 rheumotologist, 1 physiatrist, 1 family doctor, 2 orthopedic surgeons, 1 gastro surgeon, 1 pelvic surgeon. I am desperate to get well and from what I understand, "there is no objective cure" for what I have. Well, why do I have to fight for SSDI then?

I am apparently not a candidate for any surgery because I have so many bulging disks from L1 through and including S1 (and that is just my lumbar spine, I have 2 bulging discs at C1-C2 as well) and two surgeons told me they could not do the surgery because they would have to fuse my whole lumbar spine. Ugh! So I live with this nauseating pain in my lower back, hips, base of spine, legs, feet... now my hands are hurting too - don't know what that is yet.. unreal!

My pain meds are not lasting more than 3 hours now and the last 2 hours or so I am crying in pain. I see my Pain Specialist in 2 weeks for a possible change in meds. I am currently taking Hydrocodone 5/500 2/5hrs up to 8 per day with 1 Ativan and 1 Ibuprofen 600mg.

I am seeing a new Rheumy Oct 7th, thank God, the first one was a quack-a-doodle! I am sorry this is so long. I am freaking out about my hearing and am wondering how I am going to withstand even going to the hearing and sitting there - it is not going to be easy for me since I can barely get out of bed and walk around the house. Thanks for reading and I would love some words of encouragement if you have the time.

 
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Old 09-24-2011, 10:34 AM   #2
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Re: SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dobie View Post
Hi - I finally received my hearing date of October 13. Just the date 13th freaks me out. The wait has been exhausting to say the least. I already feel beaten down before I even get in there. Disabled 4/2010, filed 6/2010, denied 12/2010, appealed (w/lawyer) 12/2010, hearing scheduled 10/2011. I did write to my senator and my congressman and 2 weeks later I had a hearing date. I do think that helped. I am still scared to death for the hearing. Praying alot.

I find it interesting as I read all of the Boards that in todays medical community, they cannot find a cure or better treatment for what I have and what many of you also have: DDD, DJD, Spinal Stenosis, Bulging Discs, Facet Arthropathy, arthritis etc. These days I can barely walk, or stand for that matter for more than a few minutes. I seriously can't even stand in the kitchen and have a conversation with my husband without feeling like I am going to faint in pain. Sitting is out of the question unless I am leaning on one side. I also find it interesting when some of the doctors look at me and wonder why I am in so much pain - don't you want to just smack them right in the face!!!! I would like to know the answer to that question myself, thank you!! Thank God I have doctors backing me up since 2009. I have had 3 steriod epidural shots, 3 rounds of PT and nothing has helped me. I have been to 3 surgeons, 2 neurologists, 1 neurosurgeon, 1 rheumotologist, 1 physiatrist, 1 family doctor, 2 orthopedic surgeons, 1 gastro surgeon, 1 pelvic surgeon. I am desperate to get well and from what I understand, "there is no objective cure" for what I have. Well, why do I have to fight for SSDI then?

I am apparently not a candidate for any surgery because I have so many bulging disks from L1 through and including S1 (and that is just my lumbar spine, I have 2 bulging discs at C1-C2 as well) and two surgeons told me they could not do the surgery because they would have to fuse my whole lumbar spine. Ugh! So I live with this nauseating pain in my lower back, hips, base of spine, legs, feet... now my hands are hurting too - don't know what that is yet.. unreal!

My pain meds are not lasting more than 3 hours now and the last 2 hours or so I am crying in pain. I see my Pain Specialist in 2 weeks for a possible change in meds. I am currently taking Hydrocodone 5/500 2/5hrs up to 8 per day with 1 Ativan and 1 Ibuprofen 600mg.

I am seeing a new Rheumy Oct 7th, thank God, the first one was a quack-a-doodle! I am sorry this is so long. I am freaking out about my hearing and am wondering how I am going to withstand even going to the hearing and sitting there - it is not going to be easy for me since I can barely get out of bed and walk around the house. Thanks for reading and I would love some words of encouragement if you have the time.
Hang in there Dobie. I also suffer with a different kind of chronic pain. Constant pain can drive you to the brink of insanity or suicide. Your whole life starts to revolve around the pain. It takes center stage in your life and prevents many ppl from enjoying any of the other pleasurable aspects of living. Then, to top things off, the doctors tell you that there is nothing more that they can do for you and they can't even adequately control your pain with meds. I feel your pain Dobie. I really do. Then, you have deal with the crazy SSA in trying to obtain your SSDI. I wish i could go back to age 21 and just stay there forever and work forever until death.

Last edited by BlueSkies14; 09-24-2011 at 12:38 PM.

 
Old 09-24-2011, 03:40 PM   #3
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Re: SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!

I am currently taking Hydrocodone 5/500 2/5hrs up to 8 per day with 1 Ativan and 1 Ibuprofen 600mg.

If you are in the pain you say and that's what your doctors are prescribing.........you might as well take 2 St Joseph baby aspirin

It SUCKS being an under-prescribed pain patient,and would suggest you go to a REAL Pain Management Clinic who will at least treat your situation realistically

Best of Luck

 
Old 09-24-2011, 04:06 PM   #4
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Re: SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!

Are any of your Dr's worried about you getting hooked on that pain medication? That is a lot to take in one day! And still be suffering Was there anyway you could go to your Dr and get shots for the pain? The shots work a lot faster and to me are more effective, but that only lasts so long too. i hope that your hearing goes well and you will get a fully favorable decision ! I do not know if a brand new judge is a good thing or not. i hope it is a good sign. It is surprising that your claim has gone all the way up to the ALJ stage, with all your medical conditions. I do not understand social security sometimes. People who are obviously disabled have to go through this long drawn out process for 2 years or so , maybe they hope claimants will give up trying.

 
Old 09-24-2011, 04:12 PM   #5
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Re: SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!

Quote:
Originally Posted by BlueSkies14 View Post
Hang in there Dobie. I also suffer with a different kind of chronic pain. Constant pain can drive you to the brink of insanity or suicide. Your whole life starts to revolve around the pain. It takes center stage in your life and prevents many ppl from enjoying any of the other pleasurable aspects of living. Then, to top things off, the doctors tell you that there is nothing more that they can do for you and they can't even adequately control your pain with meds. I feel your pain Dobie. I really do. Then, you have deal with the crazy SSA in trying to obtain your SSDI. I wish i could go back to age 21 and just stay there forever and work forever until death.

 
Old 09-24-2011, 04:14 PM   #6
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Re: SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!

Quote:
Originally Posted by BlueSkies14 View Post
Hang in there Dobie. I also suffer with a different kind of chronic pain. Constant pain can drive you to the brink of insanity or suicide. Your whole life starts to revolve around the pain. It takes center stage in your life and prevents many ppl from enjoying any of the other pleasurable aspects of living. Then, to top things off, the doctors tell you that there is nothing more that they can do for you and they can't even adequately control your pain with meds. I feel your pain Dobie. I really do. Then, you have deal with the crazy SSA in trying to obtain your SSDI. I wish i could go back to age 21 and just stay there forever and work forever until death.
You are so right about the insanity - I do feel like I am going insane. I live in my bedroom only to go downstairs for food. It is not a life and I am so depressed about it. Dealing with all of the SSA stuff also has my nerves raw. I am a legal assistant so I should be used to the stress, but this is really getting to me. Thanks for all of your kind words, I really appreciate it. Good luck to you well.

 
Old 09-24-2011, 04:20 PM   #7
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Re: SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!

Quote:
Originally Posted by ferd144 View Post
I am currently taking Hydrocodone 5/500 2/5hrs up to 8 per day with 1 Ativan and 1 Ibuprofen 600mg.

If you are in the pain you say and that's what your doctors are prescribing.........you might as well take 2 St Joseph baby aspirin

It SUCKS being an under-prescribed pain patient,and would suggest you go to a REAL Pain Management Clinic who will at least treat your situation realistically

Best of Luck
You are absolutely right, the pain meds have stopped doing their job. I called my Pain Specialist about it on Friday and I have to make an appointment to see him on Monday. I am not sure what he will do. I can't stand taking all of that Hydrocodone because of what it does to my bowels. Hopefully he will prescribe something else for me, although I don't know what. The pain level is scaring me to death and no one can seem to help me. I have literally been going to doctor after doctor to try and get help. The fact of the matter is I have 8 bulging disks and 1 herniated and was told I was not a surgical candidate and I should have PT, OT and psychological counseling to help me deal with the psychological needs that come with chronic pain. Ugh!!!!

 
Old 09-24-2011, 04:28 PM   #8
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Re: SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!

Quote:
Originally Posted by mscat40 View Post
Are any of your Dr's worried about you getting hooked on that pain medication? That is a lot to take in one day! And still be suffering Was there anyway you could go to your Dr and get shots for the pain? The shots work a lot faster and to me are more effective, but that only lasts so long too. i hope that your hearing goes well and you will get a fully favorable decision ! I do not know if a brand new judge is a good thing or not. i hope it is a good sign. It is surprising that your claim has gone all the way up to the ALJ stage, with all your medical conditions. I do not understand social security sometimes. People who are obviously disabled have to go through this long drawn out process for 2 years or so , maybe they hope claimants will give up trying.
I am not sure if you can get hooked on pain meds when you take them for debilitating pain. I am sure he is concerned and I did call him to let him know about how much I was taking and it didn't seem to be working anymore. I have to make another appointment with him next week and hopefully he will change up my medications. I will ask him about the shots, thanks for that advice. I can't believe my claim has not gone through either. We asked for an OTR but then the original judge retired and now I have a new one right out of the gate. The only good thing about that is he will have no backlog and maybe I will get an answer more quickly one way or the other. My situation has been going on since 2008 when I was out on STD for 6 weeks and went back to work. Again out on STD in 2009 for 3 months and my doctor did not think I should go back but I told him I did not want to lose my job. He informed me that my degenerative disease would not get much better and wrote that in a letter. 6 months later and I was forced to resign my position because of the nauseating pain and that was April, 2010. You're right about SSD, I really don't understand how they work - I am clearly disabled. I really don't know how I am even going to travel to court to be honest with you, I can barely walk. Thanks for your kinds words, it was so appreciated.

 
Old 09-24-2011, 04:34 PM   #9
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Re: SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dobie View Post
I am not sure if you can get hooked on pain meds when you take them for debilitating pain. I am sure he is concerned and I did call him to let him know about how much I was taking and it didn't seem to be working anymore. I have to make another appointment with him next week and hopefully he will change up my medications. I will ask him about the shots, thanks for that advice. I can't believe my claim has not gone through either. We asked for an OTR but then the original judge retired and now I have a new one right out of the gate. The only good thing about that is he will have no backlog and maybe I will get an answer more quickly one way or the other. My situation has been going on since 2008 when I was out on STD for 6 weeks and went back to work. Again out on STD in 2009 for 3 months and my doctor did not think I should go back but I told him I did not want to lose my job. He informed me that my degenerative disease would not get much better and wrote that in a letter. 6 months later and I was forced to resign my position because of the nauseating pain and that was April, 2010. You're right about SSD, I really don't understand how they work - I am clearly disabled. I really don't know how I am even going to travel to court to be honest with you, I can barely walk. Thanks for your kinds words, it was so appreciated.
YES....you most certainly can get dependent(or even addicted for that matter) to opioid pain meds.

But what she is taking as prescribed in high dosage(but LOW medication) is not only useless.........but amplifying the "hooked" problem.

They not only "stop working",but you require more and more meds to maintain that level,as your body naturally raises is tolerance level to the drug(just like antibiotics)

Very SAD

Last edited by ferd144; 09-24-2011 at 04:43 PM.

 
Old 09-24-2011, 04:45 PM   #10
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Re: SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!

Quote:
Originally Posted by ferd144 View Post
YES....you most certainly can get dependent(or even addicted for that matter) to opioid pain meds.

But what she is taking as prescribed in high dosage(but LOW medication) is not only useless.........but amplifying the "hooked" problem.

They not only "stop working",but you require more and more meds to maintain that level,as your body naturally raises is tolerance level to the drug(just like antibiotics)

Very SAD
Oh, that's just freaking great, thanks.... lol

 
Old 09-24-2011, 04:51 PM   #11
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Re: SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dobie View Post
I am not sure if you can get hooked on pain meds when you take them for debilitating pain. I am sure he is concerned and I did call him to let him know about how much I was taking and it didn't seem to be working anymore. I have to make another appointment with him next week and hopefully he will change up my medications. I will ask him about the shots, thanks for that advice. I can't believe my claim has not gone through either. We asked for an OTR but then the original judge retired and now I have a new one right out of the gate. The only good thing about that is he will have no backlog and maybe I will get an answer more quickly one way or the other. My situation has been going on since 2008 when I was out on STD for 6 weeks and went back to work. Again out on STD in 2009 for 3 months and my doctor did not think I should go back but I told him I did not want to lose my job. He informed me that my degenerative disease would not get much better and wrote that in a letter. 6 months later and I was forced to resign my position because of the nauseating pain and that was April, 2010. You're right about SSD, I really don't understand how they work - I am clearly disabled. I really don't know how I am even going to travel to court to be honest with you, I can barely walk. Thanks for your kinds words, it was so appreciated.
I had severe thrid degree burns that required surgery/skin graphs . I was also taking the same kind of pain meds for a while. It only helped a small bit and made me tired which was ok. Any appoinments i had they always gave me shots of pain meds before doing anything, it usually took a couple of shots for it to do any good . So I got pretty familiar with what pain meds can do or not do. When I read about other people and their struggles to get benefits it makes me angry, especially the ones like you who are in a lot of pain everyday and have so much to deal with. i was thinking about how you were going to make it through court proceedings. I hope you have someone to help you. you cannot drive with the pain meds your taking. Their had been times i struggled badly just to put one foot in front of the other just to go up the hospital elevater to appointments , it was awful. So I feel for you. With the shots your DR. can give you stronger pain medicine then what your taking orally. Just be sure you have help driving and making inside your home safely.

 
Old 09-24-2011, 05:13 PM   #12
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Re: SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!

Quote:
Originally Posted by mscat40 View Post
I had severe thrid degree burns that required surgery/skin graphs . I was also taking the same kind of pain meds for a while. It only helped a small bit and made me tired which was ok. Any appoinments i had they always gave me shots of pain meds before doing anything, it usually took a couple of shots for it to do any good . So I got pretty familiar with what pain meds can do or not do. When I read about other people and their struggles to get benefits it makes me angry, especially the ones like you who are in a lot of pain everyday and have so much to deal with. i was thinking about how you were going to make it through court proceedings. I hope you have someone to help you. you cannot drive with the pain meds your taking. Their had been times i struggled badly just to put one foot in front of the other just to go up the hospital elevater to appointments , it was awful. So I feel for you. With the shots your DR. can give you stronger pain medicine then what your taking orally. Just be sure you have help driving and making inside your home safely.
OMG, that sounds painful. I am concerned about the pain medication but I am on top of it and will see him hopefully next week. I definitely need something stronger that last longer. My husband is going with me to court. The problem is I can't stand for more than a few minutes or sit either. This should be interesting. Maybe by 10/13 I will be on new meds and it wont be as bad as it is right now. I am literally waiting for my next dose at this point the pain is so bad. Thanks again for you kindness, it goes a long way.

 
Old 09-24-2011, 05:45 PM   #13
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Re: SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!

Quote:
Originally Posted by ferd144 View Post
YES....you most certainly can get dependent(or even addicted for that matter) to opioid pain meds.

But what she is taking as prescribed in high dosage(but LOW medication) is not only useless.........but amplifying the "hooked" problem.

They not only "stop working",but you require more and more meds to maintain that level,as your body naturally raises is tolerance level to the drug(just like antibiotics)

Very SAD
This is very true Ferd. This is what has happened to me after 20 years on psychiatric meds like benzodiazepines (valium, klonopin, xanax, and ativan). You do become dependent on most meds you take on a continual, longterm basis. The addiction/dependence on meds would be ok if not for the drug tolerance. Here is an example. My anxiety recently got so bad that I took 50 mgs valium and I only felt 10-20 % relief. When I 1st started these drugs over 20 years ago, I stayed on pretty low doses for years and my panic and anxiety were adequately controlled but gradually tolerance would slowly start to creep in and I would have to slowly updose to get the desired effect. Eventually, the tolerance would get so bad until no amount of the drug would work and then you have to go thru a painful detox/withdrawal. IMHO, I think the most painful withdrawal you can ever go thru is coming off klonopin or xanax. Pray to god these drugs never quit working if you have been taking them L/T or you will experience mental and physical pain like you have never felt before. The withdrawal from benzos is worse than any painkiller meds you can imagine. Benzos are worse than pain meds to detox after L/T use. Benzos are worse to come off than heroin. I am not kidding and the withdrawal effects can last for years. I now feel that my CNS may never heal and I am just left stuck feeling the way I feel now until I die. Meds are a double edge sword. They do work good in the beginning stages of therapy but often are not a good longterm solution because all they are doing is masking the pain you are feeling. This would be ok as I said earlier if you could mask the pain forever but tolerance sadly will slowly prevent the mask from adequately controlling the pain and you are then left in this very raw, painful state.

 
Old 09-24-2011, 07:36 PM   #14
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Re: SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dobie View Post
OMG, that sounds painful. I am concerned about the pain medication but I am on top of it and will see him hopefully next week. I definitely need something stronger that last longer. My husband is going with me to court. The problem is I can't stand for more than a few minutes or sit either. This should be interesting. Maybe by 10/13 I will be on new meds and it wont be as bad as it is right now. I am literally waiting for my next dose at this point the pain is so bad. Thanks again for you kindness, it goes a long way.
Yes, a lot of it i do not even remember in the CCU . The kind of burns I had are the worst kind anyone could get so there actually was not all that much pain do to all the nerve damage, but the second degree burns you can feel. i had a pain pump that i could push a button and it released medication around the clock too. Glad all of that is over with and now left being badly scarred. So i really got to know the diffferent kinds of pain meds , sometimes they never worked either , so it was quite a experience. I always feel badly for people who suffer from chronic pain. The only relief is sleep . I am really glad you are on top of the pain meds , and you have your husband to help you . It still is just crazy you have not been approved sooner. the judge will see how uncomfortable you are and know your disabilites are serious. For me, i was approved at the reconsideration stage so I did not ever have to go to a hearing or obtain a lawyer. I think that when you do get approved things will fall into place for you.

 
Old 09-24-2011, 07:49 PM   #15
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Re: SSDI Hearing Scheduled 10/13 - Brand new/just finished his training Judge - pray!

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Originally Posted by mscat40 View Post
Yes, a lot of it i do not even remember in the CCU . The kind of burns I had are the worst kind anyone could get so there actually was not all that much pain do to all the nerve damage, but the second degree burns you can feel. i had a pain pump that i could push a button and it released medication around the clock too. Glad all of that is over with and now left being badly scarred. So i really got to know the diffferent kinds of pain meds , sometimes they never worked either , so it was quite a experience. I always feel badly for people who suffer from chronic pain. The only relief is sleep . I am really glad you are on top of the pain meds , and you have your husband to help you . It still is just crazy you have not been approved sooner. the judge will see how uncomfortable you are and know your disabilites are serious. For me, i was approved at the reconsideration stage so I did not ever have to go to a hearing or obtain a lawyer. I think that when you do get approved things will fall into place for you.
You are such a sweetheart Mscat - thank you again for everything. I took 2 Hydrocodones at 8:30 and felt absolutely no relief - this is maddening!

 
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