JenniferJay
01-01-2001, 07:13 PM
Help me out!
I know that the one person I love the most in my life struggles with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I don't know what the "Obsession" is that he deals with, but it manifests it self (the "compulsion") through him washing his hands in scalding hot water so many times during a day, and when he washes them, he does it for at least a minute and a half each time.
He won't touch certain things, like the cuboard that's under the sink, where the trash can is. Or light switches, especially in the bathrooms. He'll pick up something else and use that thing to turn off the light switch, so he doesn't have to touch it directly. I've noticed that when he's washing his hands in the bathroom, he'll turn off the light and open the door, so he won't have to touch anything in there after he's done washing his hands.
He hasn't told me about his struggle with this...but I'm not stupid. I've noticed.
I don't know if he's afraid that I'll leave him, or that I won't love him, or if he's afraid I'll think he's a freak.
He's the most wonderful guy I've ever met. But I want to know if there's a way I could approach him, or should I pray and wait that he says something to me?
And when that happens, what kind of help is available out there and how do I get him to USE that help available? OCD can become serious and debilitating. Has anyone out there struggled with it as well? Any advice?
Thank you so much.
Jennifer
I know that the one person I love the most in my life struggles with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I don't know what the "Obsession" is that he deals with, but it manifests it self (the "compulsion") through him washing his hands in scalding hot water so many times during a day, and when he washes them, he does it for at least a minute and a half each time.
He won't touch certain things, like the cuboard that's under the sink, where the trash can is. Or light switches, especially in the bathrooms. He'll pick up something else and use that thing to turn off the light switch, so he doesn't have to touch it directly. I've noticed that when he's washing his hands in the bathroom, he'll turn off the light and open the door, so he won't have to touch anything in there after he's done washing his hands.
He hasn't told me about his struggle with this...but I'm not stupid. I've noticed.
I don't know if he's afraid that I'll leave him, or that I won't love him, or if he's afraid I'll think he's a freak.
He's the most wonderful guy I've ever met. But I want to know if there's a way I could approach him, or should I pray and wait that he says something to me?
And when that happens, what kind of help is available out there and how do I get him to USE that help available? OCD can become serious and debilitating. Has anyone out there struggled with it as well? Any advice?
Thank you so much.
Jennifer
Sponsor
chillin408
01-01-2001, 07:46 PM
i have ocd too , i need help
JenniferJay
01-01-2001, 08:48 PM
To Chillin408,
If you don't mind me asking, what is your OCD? And what is keeping you from seeking help?
Thanks for your honesty.
Jennifer
If you don't mind me asking, what is your OCD? And what is keeping you from seeking help?
Thanks for your honesty.
Jennifer
h_lynn
01-03-2001, 05:16 PM
Jennifer,
I can't say I personally know what you are going thru but I can tell you this. My brother was just recently diagnosed with OCD and he has been taking Serzone. It is like he is a different man. He can finally sit down and enjoy life. Suggesting medication may not be an option since he himself hasn't yet shared this with you but I can definitely say it has made the world of difference. The particular medication may not be the right one but there are some out there. I personally took Serzone after I lost a baby, I was on it for depression and I didn't like it. I am currently on Zoloft which is also used for OCD and I could be wrong but I think Paxil may be also. Good luck, just remember you can't help until either you or he brings the subject up..
I can't say I personally know what you are going thru but I can tell you this. My brother was just recently diagnosed with OCD and he has been taking Serzone. It is like he is a different man. He can finally sit down and enjoy life. Suggesting medication may not be an option since he himself hasn't yet shared this with you but I can definitely say it has made the world of difference. The particular medication may not be the right one but there are some out there. I personally took Serzone after I lost a baby, I was on it for depression and I didn't like it. I am currently on Zoloft which is also used for OCD and I could be wrong but I think Paxil may be also. Good luck, just remember you can't help until either you or he brings the subject up..
babesbarn
01-22-2001, 07:36 PM
Sometimes I hate to admit it but I am a Checker Compulsive person. I know my mother use to do this as she use to always go back inside the house to check the gas for fires and such. It was annoying to my father. We six children got use to it. But when I was 32 I started going back to school and I realized I was returning back to my locker to see if it was locked.This was very frustrating as I did this several times and I had to sometimes travel all the way across a parking lot to return to the building IN THE RAIN and SNOW! So to solve the problem there..I did not keep anything in the locker.
Then I found that I would recheck my portfolio for pictures and it grew to other things. And then when I moved to my present house I have to check the door for it being locked when I leave. And the coffee pot. I cut back alot on it by telling myself to TRUST that I always am careful and to LET IT GO. I went fifty miles one way and then back another fifty to check my coffee pot to see if I left it on...didn't.
I hate this! My husband is patient. I do not in any way have this a horrible as some of you as I know that I have a minor case of it. I think I got this because I smoked pot in the late 70's. for two years. But then I remember my mom.
Then I found that I would recheck my portfolio for pictures and it grew to other things. And then when I moved to my present house I have to check the door for it being locked when I leave. And the coffee pot. I cut back alot on it by telling myself to TRUST that I always am careful and to LET IT GO. I went fifty miles one way and then back another fifty to check my coffee pot to see if I left it on...didn't.
I hate this! My husband is patient. I do not in any way have this a horrible as some of you as I know that I have a minor case of it. I think I got this because I smoked pot in the late 70's. for two years. But then I remember my mom.
JenniferJay
01-22-2001, 08:42 PM
Thanks so much for your honesty, you are wonderful!
Well as far as my loved one goes, he was confronted by his mom on his OCD and she said that she had enough and she was making an apointment for him to see a doctor. So many people suffer from OCD in different forms, and there is no reason anyone should have to live with it.
I thought after his mother confronting him about it, he'd tell me, but he didn't. I'm just thankful that his mom confronted it instead of tip-toeing around it like the rest of us do!
Babesbarn- when you said that the OCD stayed, it just manifested itself in other forms, I really see that in him. It's not just washing his hands, it's even things like his clothes- He washes them constantly- it never stays in just one area of his life.
I hope that if your OCD doesn't cease, you'll get some help because you sound like a wonderful person who shouldn't be wasting time on re-checking things!
Thanks again!
Well as far as my loved one goes, he was confronted by his mom on his OCD and she said that she had enough and she was making an apointment for him to see a doctor. So many people suffer from OCD in different forms, and there is no reason anyone should have to live with it.
I thought after his mother confronting him about it, he'd tell me, but he didn't. I'm just thankful that his mom confronted it instead of tip-toeing around it like the rest of us do!
Babesbarn- when you said that the OCD stayed, it just manifested itself in other forms, I really see that in him. It's not just washing his hands, it's even things like his clothes- He washes them constantly- it never stays in just one area of his life.
I hope that if your OCD doesn't cease, you'll get some help because you sound like a wonderful person who shouldn't be wasting time on re-checking things!
Thanks again!
babesbarn
01-23-2001, 09:12 AM
You know, I also think that it manifested itself in another form. I am obsessed with the care of my husband. He is very sick these past four years and I am overly interested in finding help on the internet and becoming involved and educaİing myself. I can't leave him for even ten minutes to go out for myself without thinking about him and worrying about if he is ok. I worry he will be unsafe or have a need.He is in a wheelchair and requires my help exclusively. Perhaps in a good way, my form of compulsive obsessivness has been used. Perhaps God found a way for me to use it to his glory and I thank him for that. I will have to share this with my husband. We watched John Stossel on 20/20 and we saw some real bad cases of this problem. When I first saw it, I knew that I was far better off. I did not know the name of what I was doing but once I found it, It was so grand because it had a name. And then I could deal with it. BTW, no one in my family knows I have this. My kids just see me as overly protective when I go recheck.
JenniferJay
01-25-2001, 10:08 PM
In one of my classes the other day, we were learning about how the brain releases seratonin and how if it doesn't absorb and react properly in the frontal lobe of the brain, people develop OCD, or other anxiety disorders. It can also come across in eating disorders, depression and things like that. After hearing that information I thought I might have my window of opportunity to talk to my boyfriend about his OCD because I am pretty obsessed with weight and food and exercise to be considered mildly anorexic. I thought if I told him that then we would seem like we were on an equal playing field when it came to OCD's and anxiety disorders, but I didn't say anything. I'm such a wus!!
BUT I didn't.
It's so hard to bring it up! I want him to bring it up so badly. I just pray about it all the time. Sometimes when I'm just looking at him and I think about how much I love him, I offer up a prayer. There's times I just want to scream "stop washing your hands!" when I hear the water running in his bathroom, but instead I pray for him. He's a strong christian, but I think that he thinks that God will give him the strength to get through it...Of course He will, but I think that God also asks us to to the best we can do. And I don't think he's going to get through this without some help medically.
Babesbarn, I am so thankful for you sharing about what you are dealing with.
I'll pray for your husband. YOu sound like a wonderful woman for him!
BUT I didn't.
It's so hard to bring it up! I want him to bring it up so badly. I just pray about it all the time. Sometimes when I'm just looking at him and I think about how much I love him, I offer up a prayer. There's times I just want to scream "stop washing your hands!" when I hear the water running in his bathroom, but instead I pray for him. He's a strong christian, but I think that he thinks that God will give him the strength to get through it...Of course He will, but I think that God also asks us to to the best we can do. And I don't think he's going to get through this without some help medically.
Babesbarn, I am so thankful for you sharing about what you are dealing with.
I'll pray for your husband. YOu sound like a wonderful woman for him!
JollyRoger
01-26-2001, 01:03 PM
A definite vote here for an OCD forum..
JollyRoger
JollyRoger
Kennedy
01-26-2001, 10:53 PM
I have been diagnosed 4 times with OCD by different people. It is very unusual to only be obsessed about one thing.I am obsessive about things in general or weird things from the counter to eating. I have been told mine is quite bad however I don't scrub the floors for hours like some do.I just wipe the counter alot and before bed I have to have the apartment perfectly clean or it bugs me until I fall asleep. I have taken it to some dangerous and extreme places before meeting my husband.He is quite understanding about it but it frustrates him when I HAVE to have something done NOW or it really annoys me or when I backtrack in certain ways and he finds evidence of it in my email! Also compulsive lying is associated with it too.I had a struggle with that as a child as well as extreme rage as a teenager from the fact that because when I would get mad I got frutrated and got the feeling of EXTREME MADNESS(crazy almost) in my head like I am going to blow up and have been told by many shrinks that is all a part of it.I can contain it now having a child and all I took classes to learn how to cope before she was born.WOW...If this isn't embarrasing then WHAT IS!! I figure if I am honest and someone makes fun of me or insults me like they have before....what a life they must have to feel that need to insult me.
[This message has been edited by Kennedy (edited 01-26-2001).]
[This message has been edited by Kennedy (edited 01-26-2001).]
[This message has been edited by Kennedy (edited 01-26-2001).]
[This message has been edited by Kennedy (edited 01-26-2001).]
Kennedy
01-26-2001, 11:01 PM
I almost forgot...My friend loretta always try's to tell me How it is and WHY it is with things like OCD.Things like that really aggrivate me.I get very angry and get my back up because people like her always think they know how it is and have the nerve to diagnose themselves because they are studying to be a counsellor and put my madness and pain that nearly ruined and very well one day could have ended my life in the same category as her because she obsessed about one thing once in a while! Mine is so bad I don't leave the house sometimes for fear in the grocery line people are thinking I am fat or something since Im not a size 8 anymore.Sorry there I go again.But that is just an example.
Mister
01-29-2001, 03:31 PM
My brother never did well in school and the other kids called him retarded and he is so afraid of that label that he goes back and forth about getting help. He came to visit me for a month ( he has extreme troubles keeping a job) and in that time I found him to be not only intelligent but almost a walking encyclopedia. I explained to him that combing his hair, doing the dishes, and
brushing his teeth for 45 minutes at a time are surely signs of O.C.D. He did visit a doctor when he went back home but because he is not a minor we have no way of knowing what the Dr. said except what he wants to tell us. He says he doesn't want to take medication but sometimes I worry that he is so used to living like this that the thought of controlling this disorder scares him more than anything. Any input would be greatly appreciated!
brushing his teeth for 45 minutes at a time are surely signs of O.C.D. He did visit a doctor when he went back home but because he is not a minor we have no way of knowing what the Dr. said except what he wants to tell us. He says he doesn't want to take medication but sometimes I worry that he is so used to living like this that the thought of controlling this disorder scares him more than anything. Any input would be greatly appreciated!
pert
01-29-2001, 04:09 PM
Originally posted by JenniferJay:
Help me out!
I know that the one person I love the most in my life struggles with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I don't know what the "Obsession" is that he deals with, but it manifests it self (the "compulsion") through him washing his hands in scalding hot water so many times during a day, and when he washes them, he does it for at least a minute and a half each time.
He won't touch certain things, like the cuboard that's under the sink, where the trash can is. Or light switches, especially in the bathrooms. He'll pick up something else and use that thing to turn off the light switch, so he doesn't have to touch it directly. I've noticed that when he's washing his hands in the bathroom, he'll turn off the light and open the door, so he won't have to touch anything in there after he's done washing his hands.
He hasn't told me about his struggle with this...but I'm not stupid. I've noticed.
I don't know if he's afraid that I'll leave him, or that I won't love him, or if he's afraid I'll think he's a freak.
He's the most wonderful guy I've ever met. But I want to know if there's a way I could approach him, or should I pray and wait that he says something to me?
And when that happens, what kind of help is available out there and how do I get him to USE that help available? OCD can become serious and debilitating. Has anyone out there struggled with it as well? Any advice?
Thank you so much.
Jennifer
i think this is a great idea.
i think ocd can come in varying forms and different degrees.
like checking, ie, rearranging items such as clothing in drawers (never having it "just right");
obsessing over a misplaced article of clothing; searching frantically,yet subconsciously knowing where it is;
having to do a "whole" job of cleaning rather than "partial;"
nothing is ever just the way it should be or where it should be;
therefore never achieving the ultimate ideal of completion.....
Help me out!
I know that the one person I love the most in my life struggles with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I don't know what the "Obsession" is that he deals with, but it manifests it self (the "compulsion") through him washing his hands in scalding hot water so many times during a day, and when he washes them, he does it for at least a minute and a half each time.
He won't touch certain things, like the cuboard that's under the sink, where the trash can is. Or light switches, especially in the bathrooms. He'll pick up something else and use that thing to turn off the light switch, so he doesn't have to touch it directly. I've noticed that when he's washing his hands in the bathroom, he'll turn off the light and open the door, so he won't have to touch anything in there after he's done washing his hands.
He hasn't told me about his struggle with this...but I'm not stupid. I've noticed.
I don't know if he's afraid that I'll leave him, or that I won't love him, or if he's afraid I'll think he's a freak.
He's the most wonderful guy I've ever met. But I want to know if there's a way I could approach him, or should I pray and wait that he says something to me?
And when that happens, what kind of help is available out there and how do I get him to USE that help available? OCD can become serious and debilitating. Has anyone out there struggled with it as well? Any advice?
Thank you so much.
Jennifer
i think this is a great idea.
i think ocd can come in varying forms and different degrees.
like checking, ie, rearranging items such as clothing in drawers (never having it "just right");
obsessing over a misplaced article of clothing; searching frantically,yet subconsciously knowing where it is;
having to do a "whole" job of cleaning rather than "partial;"
nothing is ever just the way it should be or where it should be;
therefore never achieving the ultimate ideal of completion.....
Mister
01-30-2001, 12:38 PM
The stress of worrying @ all these things is enough to debilitate. Has anyone tried meditation or the like to try to gain more mind control?
pert
01-30-2001, 04:08 PM
Originally posted by Mister:
The stress of worrying @ all these things is enough to debilitate. Has anyone tried meditation or the like to try to gain more mind control?
no but i'm considering hypnotherapy.
plus antidepressant such as paxil .
The stress of worrying @ all these things is enough to debilitate. Has anyone tried meditation or the like to try to gain more mind control?
no but i'm considering hypnotherapy.
plus antidepressant such as paxil .
cutenbrat
01-31-2001, 01:43 AM
an ocd board is needed. I have been washing so much lately that my hands are literally bleeding and I can't stop even though I really try.
Mister
01-31-2001, 11:26 AM
Hi Cutenbrat!
My brother's fingers were so red and inflamed from his need to pick at them when he came to visit that I turned the tables. I decided to pamper the heck out of his hands. I gave him manicures & showed him how to take care of them. Of course now his hands look great because this still gives him something to focus on. But it's nice to see that they don't look so painful.
Maybe you should pamper the heck out of yourself !!!
My brother's fingers were so red and inflamed from his need to pick at them when he came to visit that I turned the tables. I decided to pamper the heck out of his hands. I gave him manicures & showed him how to take care of them. Of course now his hands look great because this still gives him something to focus on. But it's nice to see that they don't look so painful.
Maybe you should pamper the heck out of yourself !!!
JenniferJay
01-31-2001, 10:30 PM
Wow, I'm suprised that the act of giving a manicure could cure OCD! If it did, that's amazing, but from what I know about OCD, I don't think it's cured that simply. I do have to say, though, that it was a very nice thing for you to do for your brother. It sounds like your brother had a bad habit, like biting his nails, except his was picking at his hands.
I wish there were easy answers for OCD because it tears me apart to watch someone that I love suffer from it. I bet that my "suffering" from watching it isn't even close to how hard the person bearing this disorder feels. AND HOW I WISH I HAD THE COURAGE TO SAY SOMETHING!
I just wanted to say that this message board has been wonderful, and I'm so thankful that everyone who has written on here has been so honest.
I wish there were easy answers for OCD because it tears me apart to watch someone that I love suffer from it. I bet that my "suffering" from watching it isn't even close to how hard the person bearing this disorder feels. AND HOW I WISH I HAD THE COURAGE TO SAY SOMETHING!
I just wanted to say that this message board has been wonderful, and I'm so thankful that everyone who has written on here has been so honest.
cutenbrat
01-31-2001, 11:47 PM
I am constantly putting lotion on them including real udder bulm and it still breaks out-I don't know what to do and I can't seem to stop washing-sometimes I just want to scream.
JenniferJay
02-01-2001, 01:12 AM
Cutenbrat,
Please tell me that you have someone you can talk to about this! Someone who will help you find an appointment with a doctor!
What you just said, about the udder balm, scared me because that is EXACTLY what my boyfriend uses on his hands because of how much he washes them. For me to hear how hard it is for you to deal with this makes it easier for me to see things from his perspective.
How long has this been going on for you? Has it just started, or has it been ongoing yet increasing all the time?
If someone could do something for you, what would it be? Would it bother you if someone confronted you on it? Does anyone know?
Sorry about all the questions...You just sound like you probably are dealing with the same OCD my boyfriend is.
I know I'm just some other name on this forum, but is there anything I can do to help?
Jennifer
Please tell me that you have someone you can talk to about this! Someone who will help you find an appointment with a doctor!
What you just said, about the udder balm, scared me because that is EXACTLY what my boyfriend uses on his hands because of how much he washes them. For me to hear how hard it is for you to deal with this makes it easier for me to see things from his perspective.
How long has this been going on for you? Has it just started, or has it been ongoing yet increasing all the time?
If someone could do something for you, what would it be? Would it bother you if someone confronted you on it? Does anyone know?
Sorry about all the questions...You just sound like you probably are dealing with the same OCD my boyfriend is.
I know I'm just some other name on this forum, but is there anything I can do to help?
Jennifer
Mister
02-01-2001, 10:59 AM
By the way I never said manicures cured.
My brother has alot of different compulsions. When I confornted him about it I said:
"You are NOT retarded (people have told him he's "slow" because he takes so long but in all actuality he's doing these things over & over-this is what takes so long)I think you have O.C.D. and it's not your fault. It's a chemical imbalance or something. Alot of people have it."
He seemed relieved that we could talk about it instead of everyone tip-toeing around.
You should talk to your b/f because it might bring you closer together. It did for my brother and I.
Good Luck!!!
My brother has alot of different compulsions. When I confornted him about it I said:
"You are NOT retarded (people have told him he's "slow" because he takes so long but in all actuality he's doing these things over & over-this is what takes so long)I think you have O.C.D. and it's not your fault. It's a chemical imbalance or something. Alot of people have it."
He seemed relieved that we could talk about it instead of everyone tip-toeing around.
You should talk to your b/f because it might bring you closer together. It did for my brother and I.
Good Luck!!!
JenniferJay
02-02-2001, 01:20 AM
Thanks for clairifying that for me...I really am having a hard time bringing it up. It's so oxy-moronic too; I'm more afraid to bring up his OCD the closer that we get to each other.
Does that make any sense?
It doesn't even make sense to me! I just know that either he or I have to bring it up and nothing will change unless one of us does.
Thanks for encouraging me to talk to him! I need to hear that.
Does that make any sense?
It doesn't even make sense to me! I just know that either he or I have to bring it up and nothing will change unless one of us does.
Thanks for encouraging me to talk to him! I need to hear that.
cutenbrat
02-02-2001, 01:21 AM
I talk to my therpist and psychtrist at times about it-it drives nuts at times but it's like I have to do it. And you are a person, not just another name on the message board so never feel that way-there are so many differnt theories about OCD and I really don't know what to belive-I also check things a lot and at times won't step on cracks-sometiems I can kinda control things but other times it's really bad-I will go shopping and have to go to the bathroom just to wash my hands. If you have questions for me feel free to ask and I will do my best to answer.
God Bless.
God Bless.
JenniferJay
02-02-2001, 01:45 AM
I like you Cutenbrat!
I have plenty of questions...so here are a few:
Do you take any medication? If you do, what is it, and do you think it helps?
When did your OCD start and did something trigger it?
Do people that know you, either aquaintences or friends, know that you have OCD? Do you think that there are any signs that others can see, that would show them that you have OCD?
And my final question for now is, how did you first realize that you had OCD? Did someone else have to bring it up, or did you have to ask someone for help?
I know there are a lot of questions, so don't feel like you have to answer them all! I'd appreciate any answer that you gave me.
Thanks, and God bless you too!
I have plenty of questions...so here are a few:
Do you take any medication? If you do, what is it, and do you think it helps?
When did your OCD start and did something trigger it?
Do people that know you, either aquaintences or friends, know that you have OCD? Do you think that there are any signs that others can see, that would show them that you have OCD?
And my final question for now is, how did you first realize that you had OCD? Did someone else have to bring it up, or did you have to ask someone for help?
I know there are a lot of questions, so don't feel like you have to answer them all! I'd appreciate any answer that you gave me.
Thanks, and God bless you too!
cutenbrat
02-02-2001, 03:58 PM
Yes I am on medication but it's more for depression than OCD-celexa and serezone-my therpist thinks OCD is a way for me to avoid other issues-a way to keep control kinda like an eating disorder I think. I knew I had a problem and one day just told someone when I was in a hosptial for something different. I dont' know what triggered into exactly and don't know when I started it exactly either-I do know that I have some really bad times and some not so bad times as well though. I hope that answer your questions hon.
God Bless.
God Bless.
JenniferJay
02-03-2001, 07:39 AM
Yes, you've helped by answering my questions! OCD is so common, but it seems rare that people are willing to talk about it. Thanks for being open with me- you are so helpful by being so transparent.
I don't see why OCD is something that people try so desperately to hide because a) it's managable, b) I see some areas in my life that are in the same catagory with OCD and c) WE ARE HUMAN. I was just thinking today about how we are humans, and therefore we are susceptible to human conditions; things which are out of our control. We can't control the simple things, like how fast our hair grows or the color of our eyes, so how do we expect to control the brain? I'm a Christian and I believe that someday I'll have a perfect body in heaven that is free of disease and disorder and chaos, but for now I'm a human and things will happen to my body and brain, and I think that I have an obligation to do the best that I can, with the resources that are on this earth.
Gosh, I love my b/f so much...All I want is for him to be happy. I want to be there for him, no matter what, but I guess nothing can be done until one of us brings up this subject, huh.
Cutenbrat, thanks for talking to me. I'll keep you in my prayers,
God Bless!
I don't see why OCD is something that people try so desperately to hide because a) it's managable, b) I see some areas in my life that are in the same catagory with OCD and c) WE ARE HUMAN. I was just thinking today about how we are humans, and therefore we are susceptible to human conditions; things which are out of our control. We can't control the simple things, like how fast our hair grows or the color of our eyes, so how do we expect to control the brain? I'm a Christian and I believe that someday I'll have a perfect body in heaven that is free of disease and disorder and chaos, but for now I'm a human and things will happen to my body and brain, and I think that I have an obligation to do the best that I can, with the resources that are on this earth.
Gosh, I love my b/f so much...All I want is for him to be happy. I want to be there for him, no matter what, but I guess nothing can be done until one of us brings up this subject, huh.
Cutenbrat, thanks for talking to me. I'll keep you in my prayers,
God Bless!
pert
02-05-2001, 01:06 AM
Originally posted by JenniferJay:
Yes, you've helped by answering my questions! OCD is so common, but it seems rare that people are willing to talk about it. Thanks for being open with me- you are so helpful by being so transparent.
I don't see why OCD is something that people try so desperately to hide because a) it's managable, b) I see some areas in my life that are in the same catagory with OCD and c) WE ARE HUMAN. I was just thinking today about how we are humans, and therefore we are susceptible to human conditions; things which are out of our control. We can't control the simple things, like how fast our hair grows or the color of our eyes, so how do we expect to control the brain? I'm a Christian and I believe that someday I'll have a perfect body in heaven that is free of disease and disorder and chaos, but for now I'm a human and things will happen to my body and brain, and I think that I have an obligation to do the best that I can, with the resources that are on this earth.
Gosh, I love my b/f so much...All I want is for him to be happy. I want to be there for him, no matter what, but I guess nothing can be done until one of us brings up this subject, huh.
Cutenbrat, thanks for talking to me. I'll keep you in my prayers,
God Bless!
jj,i'm glad you brought this up and i liked reading this forum.
i should add that w/my condition i continually have problems w/not being able to touch certain things ie kitchen items,sponges,towels,etc...
that others use.
its gotten worse.
Yes, you've helped by answering my questions! OCD is so common, but it seems rare that people are willing to talk about it. Thanks for being open with me- you are so helpful by being so transparent.
I don't see why OCD is something that people try so desperately to hide because a) it's managable, b) I see some areas in my life that are in the same catagory with OCD and c) WE ARE HUMAN. I was just thinking today about how we are humans, and therefore we are susceptible to human conditions; things which are out of our control. We can't control the simple things, like how fast our hair grows or the color of our eyes, so how do we expect to control the brain? I'm a Christian and I believe that someday I'll have a perfect body in heaven that is free of disease and disorder and chaos, but for now I'm a human and things will happen to my body and brain, and I think that I have an obligation to do the best that I can, with the resources that are on this earth.
Gosh, I love my b/f so much...All I want is for him to be happy. I want to be there for him, no matter what, but I guess nothing can be done until one of us brings up this subject, huh.
Cutenbrat, thanks for talking to me. I'll keep you in my prayers,
God Bless!
jj,i'm glad you brought this up and i liked reading this forum.
i should add that w/my condition i continually have problems w/not being able to touch certain things ie kitchen items,sponges,towels,etc...
that others use.
its gotten worse.
cutenbrat
02-05-2001, 12:27 PM
I hear you Pert. If I touch certain things I have to go wash my hands most of the time-even if I am shopping. I am trying to keep things inline, but it's so hard and I don't know what to do and just pray that therapy and the Lord will help. It's really hard at night when I keep checking my clock to make sure it's on the "right" number and adding and subratacing, multpliing and dividing numbers to make sure it's not a "bad" number.
God Bless.
God Bless.
JenniferJay
02-06-2001, 08:39 PM
Cutenbrat,
Do many people that are involved in your life know that you have OCD? Would it help you if there was someone there to keep you accountable and that you could talk to when you find yourself fighting the urge to go wash your hands or act upon your other obessions?
Or would it not make a difference?
You are a saint for answering all my questions!
I hope you are doing well!
God Bless
-Jennifer
Do many people that are involved in your life know that you have OCD? Would it help you if there was someone there to keep you accountable and that you could talk to when you find yourself fighting the urge to go wash your hands or act upon your other obessions?
Or would it not make a difference?
You are a saint for answering all my questions!
I hope you are doing well!
God Bless
-Jennifer
JenniferJay
02-06-2001, 08:41 PM
Also, anyone else who wants to answer the questions that I have can feel free! I'd love to know how each person that has OCD deals with it and what helps and hurts-
Thanks,
Jennifer
Thanks,
Jennifer
cutenbrat
02-08-2001, 12:27 AM
Yes people know but I'm not sure how helpful they could be-I get really anxious if I can't do my "rituals" and that would make me irratred and angry I think-one time I did wash my hands and my therpist was there and I did explain some things that I "had" to do to her and that might be a step or maybe not-not sure yet.
God Bless.
God Bless.
JenniferJay
02-08-2001, 01:08 AM
How long have you been in therapy and/or on medication?
Notice any difference?
God bless you too!
Jennifer
Notice any difference?
God bless you too!
Jennifer
cutenbrat
02-08-2001, 03:04 AM
I'm not really in therapy for the OCD-mostly my therapy focuses on the other more serious things such as eating disorders and emotianlly things and as those resolve hopefully so will my OCD for it might be more of an emtional thing-I have yet to convince myself of that though for it feels different than that. I'm not sure though-I know some believe that OCD and ED's(eating disorders) go hand in hand and in some ways I can see this, but it some ways I can't. Sorry for the unclear answer.
God Bless.
God Bless.
JenniferJay
02-08-2001, 10:23 PM
I can see how ED's and OCD can go hand in hand. I learned in school that an eating disorder is like having OCD, but the OCD is the fear of getting fat. Everything is done to prevent gaining weight, even though it's irrational.
HOW do I know how it feels? Because I think I have struggled with an eating disorder. I've never been diagnosed, but My weight has been down to 108 (I'm 5'6") and now it's up to 120 and I feel like a blimp, even though I KNOW I'm not. When I feel like I'm gaining weight it's almost a suffocating feeling and at times I want to just bawl! It's silly, because I know that I'm thinner than most girls, but to myself I feel huge.
But I don't think that my feelings even touch on what someone with OCD feels like. I'm sure that what I think is the same thing that 90% of all females think about their bodies too.
If you don't mind me asking, how old are you cutenbrat?
HOW do I know how it feels? Because I think I have struggled with an eating disorder. I've never been diagnosed, but My weight has been down to 108 (I'm 5'6") and now it's up to 120 and I feel like a blimp, even though I KNOW I'm not. When I feel like I'm gaining weight it's almost a suffocating feeling and at times I want to just bawl! It's silly, because I know that I'm thinner than most girls, but to myself I feel huge.
But I don't think that my feelings even touch on what someone with OCD feels like. I'm sure that what I think is the same thing that 90% of all females think about their bodies too.
If you don't mind me asking, how old are you cutenbrat?
cutenbrat
02-08-2001, 10:36 PM
I am 20 years old. At times I feel a lot longer and other times I feel much older and other times I feel like I should if that makes sense. I don't feel that my eating and OCD goes hand in hand-it's such a different feeling-did you read what I wrote on the other board Jenny-its the one that's open to all topics-it's called through the eyes of OCD or something like that-take a look if you want-it might interst you hon. In some cultures it's beautiful to be fat-in this culture men really like girls(and girls like men for I can't forget the men) that have meat on their bones-not all bone-I guess this concept just hasn't clicked in enough people's hands and for a little of people ED's are from emtional things as well.
God Bless.
God Bless.
JenniferJay
02-09-2001, 01:17 AM
Thanks for the insight. I read your post on the other forum and it was wonderful! In a way it's great how we can express ourselves on these message boards in ways that we can't in "real life" or in public. But then at the same time it's my downfall...I know I should be applying these things in my day to day life and I'm not. I can vent on here and get responses and advise, but unless I use it, all of it was futile.
You are a very transparent writer and your other post on the other forum was so honest- I felt like I understood better of what you feel. Insead of just watching my boyfriend go through this I could see what the thought process is like too.
You sounded like you were about the same age as me- I'm 19.
God bless you too!
Jen
[This message has been edited by JenniferJay (edited 02-09-2001).]
You are a very transparent writer and your other post on the other forum was so honest- I felt like I understood better of what you feel. Insead of just watching my boyfriend go through this I could see what the thought process is like too.
You sounded like you were about the same age as me- I'm 19.
God bless you too!
Jen
[This message has been edited by JenniferJay (edited 02-09-2001).]
cutenbrat
02-12-2001, 10:18 PM
I am 20 years old-so very close in age-I also find that I have to say what is on my mind-this might sound funny, but it drives me nuts and a lot of the times I try to hold my tounge but I begin to feel more and more guilty and have to say what it is I am thinking-trust me some of the things aren't very nice and I feel so bad-I pray that all of this will stop one day soon.
Jenny do you have yahoo messanger-it would be great to be able to talk more often.
I noticed that my message was deltated on the other board and don't know why.
God Bless.
Jenny do you have yahoo messanger-it would be great to be able to talk more often.
I noticed that my message was deltated on the other board and don't know why.
God Bless.
JenniferJay
02-12-2001, 11:35 PM
I don't have Yahoo IM, but I do have AOL IM. I will download Yahoo IM once I have my own home computer linked up to the internet. If you download AOL IM, my screen name is JenSampps.
What did you mean by this?:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by cutenbrat:
it drives me nuts and a lot of the times I try to hold my tounge but I begin to feel more and more guilty and have to say what it is I am thinking-trust me some of the things aren't very nice and I feel so bad-I pray that all of this will stop one day soon.
Cutenbrat, I am keeping you in my prayers.
I know this is a random question, but were you a good student in school? Or was your mind pulled all over the place because of OCD?
I've learned that people who struggle with OCD are statistically more intellegent than the average American.
This might not pertain to you, but I wonder if sometimes teens are diagnosed with ADD, when they really have OCD. Have you ever heard of that?
God Bless!
What did you mean by this?:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by cutenbrat:
it drives me nuts and a lot of the times I try to hold my tounge but I begin to feel more and more guilty and have to say what it is I am thinking-trust me some of the things aren't very nice and I feel so bad-I pray that all of this will stop one day soon.
Cutenbrat, I am keeping you in my prayers.
I know this is a random question, but were you a good student in school? Or was your mind pulled all over the place because of OCD?
I've learned that people who struggle with OCD are statistically more intellegent than the average American.
This might not pertain to you, but I wonder if sometimes teens are diagnosed with ADD, when they really have OCD. Have you ever heard of that?
God Bless!
cutenbrat
02-13-2001, 01:52 PM
Hi again Jenny,
I was a good student in English espeically(took AP English my senior year) but subjects like Math and Advance Bio were really hard for me but I did pass all of my classes and I love school. I am not going right now because of some medical problems not due to the OCD(long story that you might have seen me posted for it is here someweres parts of it).
e-mail me sometime if you like at cutensassybrat@yahoo.com
God Bless,
Penny
I was a good student in English espeically(took AP English my senior year) but subjects like Math and Advance Bio were really hard for me but I did pass all of my classes and I love school. I am not going right now because of some medical problems not due to the OCD(long story that you might have seen me posted for it is here someweres parts of it).
e-mail me sometime if you like at cutensassybrat@yahoo.com
God Bless,
Penny
pert
02-15-2001, 05:24 PM
in answer to some of the above questions,i believe my condition began in late teens but i've had it since toddler.
as for meds,i believe ,in my case,they are taken as needed.
as i have serious chronic allergies.
anyhow,i also believe that it began as anxiety and depression in late teens.
it manifested itself in perfectionistic tendencies later.
to the point of rechecking,rearranging,and such.
as for someone taking meds or not,that's their personal choice.
i believe that those of us w/an anxiety condition of any kind also can be superstitious (as i am)
in other words,believing untruths.
therefore causing more phobias?
i also feel those of us w/phobias,fears,and anxiety tend to be muchmore controlling than others.
(worriers)
as for meds,i believe ,in my case,they are taken as needed.
as i have serious chronic allergies.
anyhow,i also believe that it began as anxiety and depression in late teens.
it manifested itself in perfectionistic tendencies later.
to the point of rechecking,rearranging,and such.
as for someone taking meds or not,that's their personal choice.
i believe that those of us w/an anxiety condition of any kind also can be superstitious (as i am)
in other words,believing untruths.
therefore causing more phobias?
i also feel those of us w/phobias,fears,and anxiety tend to be muchmore controlling than others.
(worriers)
JenniferJay
02-19-2001, 05:41 AM
My boyfriend finally told me that he has OCD.
He aknowledges that he has a problem, but he doesn't think that it's TOO big of problem, and that he can handle it.
He doesn't want me to be his "therapist" or to try and "fix" him, which I understand.
I just want him to have the opportunity to live a life where he can manage it...
He tells me that he can handle it, but I have the feeling that if he was able to handle it, it wouldn't be a problem.
Right now, I'm kinda unsure about what to do, if anything. Does anyone, (cutenbrat???) have any advice? Or if you could say something to him, what would it be?
I love him and I know he loves me very much too, but like anyone who has a problem, they often don't see it as one.
Once again, I come to this message board asking for help! If I had OCD, and I knew it, but I didn't want to do anything about it, what would you say to me?
Thanks,
Jen
He aknowledges that he has a problem, but he doesn't think that it's TOO big of problem, and that he can handle it.
He doesn't want me to be his "therapist" or to try and "fix" him, which I understand.
I just want him to have the opportunity to live a life where he can manage it...
He tells me that he can handle it, but I have the feeling that if he was able to handle it, it wouldn't be a problem.
Right now, I'm kinda unsure about what to do, if anything. Does anyone, (cutenbrat???) have any advice? Or if you could say something to him, what would it be?
I love him and I know he loves me very much too, but like anyone who has a problem, they often don't see it as one.
Once again, I come to this message board asking for help! If I had OCD, and I knew it, but I didn't want to do anything about it, what would you say to me?
Thanks,
Jen
cutenbrat
02-21-2001, 04:35 PM
Hi again Jen,
I am not sure what you should tell him-it's not always easy to admit that you have a problem and something is out of control-just be there for him and don't push him to hard for he may pull away from this. I pray that I had the right words, but I don't-I'm sorry Jen-everyone is so different and I don't know him or his personaility. Does anyone else know about him? How will do you know his family-I read that OCD can be gentics-it was just a theroy though-people usually had OCD well though depending on them and the degree of it I think though.
God Bless,
Penny
I am not sure what you should tell him-it's not always easy to admit that you have a problem and something is out of control-just be there for him and don't push him to hard for he may pull away from this. I pray that I had the right words, but I don't-I'm sorry Jen-everyone is so different and I don't know him or his personaility. Does anyone else know about him? How will do you know his family-I read that OCD can be gentics-it was just a theroy though-people usually had OCD well though depending on them and the degree of it I think though.
God Bless,
Penny
JenniferJay
02-22-2001, 12:11 AM
Penny,
I'm very close with his family. Heck, I'm closer with them than I am with my own family. They know about his OCD, even though he refuses to talk about it with them. And I do think that he "inhereted" the genes for it. A lot of depression and anxiety disorders and phobias run in his mom's side of the family.
Nothing changed between us after he told me. If anything, our relationship is better. I don't bring it up, because like you said, I don't want to push him away.
If he wants help, I think he'll just have to hit a point where he's ready to accept it.
How are you doing? Are things going easier? Harder? Anything new going on???
Jen
I'm very close with his family. Heck, I'm closer with them than I am with my own family. They know about his OCD, even though he refuses to talk about it with them. And I do think that he "inhereted" the genes for it. A lot of depression and anxiety disorders and phobias run in his mom's side of the family.
Nothing changed between us after he told me. If anything, our relationship is better. I don't bring it up, because like you said, I don't want to push him away.
If he wants help, I think he'll just have to hit a point where he's ready to accept it.
How are you doing? Are things going easier? Harder? Anything new going on???
Jen
cutenbrat
02-22-2001, 04:18 PM
Not much else new with me-I can't wait for warmer weather so I can enjoy the outdoors-the cold weather causes me to have coughing attacks and makes my breathing harder for me. It's frustrating knowing only about 2 years ago I could run for cross country and now I can't walk without problems at times because of lung problems-yet I am blessed to be hear today and strongly believe in God for it is He that saved my life. Maybe you could pray for your boyfriend and pray for answers. Do what you feel is right.
God Bless.
God Bless.
cutenbrat
03-02-2001, 12:38 AM
Jenni were have you been? I miss talking to you.
God Bless.
God Bless.
JollyRoger
03-03-2001, 01:51 PM
Another vote for an OCD forum.. Yes! Yes!!
Cheers :)
JollyRoger
Cheers :)
JollyRoger
Lynn893
03-03-2001, 03:24 PM
Originally posted by cutenbrat:
I am constantly putting lotion on them including real udder bulm and it still breaks out-I don't know what to do and I can't seem to stop washing-sometimes I just want to scream.
Cutenbrat: is this a need to wash your hands because you think that you have picked up germs, or is it just to wask your hands for no reason that you can think of? the reason I'm asking - is because they sell this new soap - antibacterial no water needed - instead of using water (which dries the skin out) you just rub this lotion type cleaner into your hands until it evaporates (approx. less than a minute) and your hands are clean!!! The next time you are at the grocery or the drug store - look for this soap - I don't know the name - it's in a hand pump - and it says that it is hand soap but you don't use water.
Hope this helps.
To everyone on this thread - God bless you, everyone. I hope that you all find peace within, to help you on your hard life's journeys.
Peace :)
I am constantly putting lotion on them including real udder bulm and it still breaks out-I don't know what to do and I can't seem to stop washing-sometimes I just want to scream.
Cutenbrat: is this a need to wash your hands because you think that you have picked up germs, or is it just to wask your hands for no reason that you can think of? the reason I'm asking - is because they sell this new soap - antibacterial no water needed - instead of using water (which dries the skin out) you just rub this lotion type cleaner into your hands until it evaporates (approx. less than a minute) and your hands are clean!!! The next time you are at the grocery or the drug store - look for this soap - I don't know the name - it's in a hand pump - and it says that it is hand soap but you don't use water.
Hope this helps.
To everyone on this thread - God bless you, everyone. I hope that you all find peace within, to help you on your hard life's journeys.
Peace :)
JenniferJay
03-03-2001, 11:30 PM
I'm still here Penny!
I just wrote a paper for my psych class on OCD. It was paper that had to be in a "scientific" tone of voice, so I had to leave out my own feelings and opinions, but I did attach an additional letter to my professor explaining why I chose this topic.
This forum helped me by giving me a glimpse into what life can be like if OCD is a part of it. I don't think I can even touch on what it must be like for someone who suffers with it...After writing this paper, I just pray that those of you who do have OCD can find the motivation to seek help.
Penny, I'll e-mail you!
Jen
I just wrote a paper for my psych class on OCD. It was paper that had to be in a "scientific" tone of voice, so I had to leave out my own feelings and opinions, but I did attach an additional letter to my professor explaining why I chose this topic.
This forum helped me by giving me a glimpse into what life can be like if OCD is a part of it. I don't think I can even touch on what it must be like for someone who suffers with it...After writing this paper, I just pray that those of you who do have OCD can find the motivation to seek help.
Penny, I'll e-mail you!
Jen
cutenbrat
03-04-2001, 02:07 AM
Hi to both of you-I have seen soap like that, but I don't think I would like it-just for a tid bit do you both know that with all the new soaps and sprays to kill germs we are harming ourselves for there are good germs along with bad germs and we are killing both of them-also the bad germs are getting used to our sprays and things so they are becoming harder and harder to fight which makes them more dangerous-so simple germs might not be simple anymore-okay and ot answer Lynn's question I feel that I have germs on my hands or that they are really dirty even though they really aren't all the time-I like soap and water and don't think I could leave that method at this time-I can only pray that some time I will be able to get over this all together.
God Bless both of you. :)
God Bless both of you. :)
cutenbrat
03-08-2001, 02:57 PM
Someone just asked about OCD, so I thought maybe all of thsi would help them if I brought it up again.
God Bless.
God Bless.
cutenbrat
07-31-2001, 04:04 PM
Just an update-my therpist doesn't think I have OCD, just symptoms of it and we are making some links how it intertwins with the eating disorder.
God Bless.
God Bless.
stefanies41280
08-03-2001, 07:36 PM
JenniferJay, my boyfriend has the exact same thing. I know how hard it is for you to go through it. It actually has gone as bad as him washing his credit cards. If you give me your e-mail address, maybe we can talk. Thanks.
Stef
Stef
JenniferJay
08-04-2001, 01:24 AM
Stef,
I would love to talk! My e-mail address is sampps@excite.com.
Thanks,
Jennifer
I would love to talk! My e-mail address is sampps@excite.com.
Thanks,
Jennifer
cutenbrat
03-18-2002, 03:33 PM
Jennifer it's been awhile since you have posted-how are things going?
flyfskm
03-24-2002, 12:19 AM
for more on ocd you can go to the mental health and stress and anxiety boards. i have ocd and that's where most of us are at. kim. :wave:
JenniferJay
03-28-2002, 09:01 PM
Hi! I'm still here! My boyfriend's OCD is waxing and waning- There's times where it seems like he doesn't have a problem at all, but then all of a sudden I catch him going from bathroom to bathroom, washing his hands. I wonder what triggers it...stress perhaps? Or if there is no rhyme or reason. I STILL haven't confronted him about it. I know that his behavior isn't typical, or even normal, but it hasn't interfered with our relationship seriously. I know that's not an excuse though, because it can become worse and worse.
Penny, how are you doing?
I wish that this topic could become more public and that others can see that it doesn't happen to "weirdos". It happens to attractive, successful, intellegent people. My boyfriend has everything going for him, but then he struggles with this.
This message board has been so supportive, helpful and insitive for me. Thanks.
Penny, how are you doing?
I wish that this topic could become more public and that others can see that it doesn't happen to "weirdos". It happens to attractive, successful, intellegent people. My boyfriend has everything going for him, but then he struggles with this.
This message board has been so supportive, helpful and insitive for me. Thanks.