Chaz
01-05-2004, 07:11 PM
I am just recovering from some kind of gastric flu(which I have had for a month) which had left me nauseus, with a low appetite and tired.
At the moment I am feeling low in confidence and my self esteem has lowered. Is this normal after quite a nasty illness?
Stupid thoughts are going round my head(Not suicidal) in regards to my relationship with my girlfriend who I have been seeing for just over a year. There is no problem in our relationship, but over a month ago i was kinda happy go lucky, whereas now I am thinking things like 'how can a really nice girl like her be going out with me', and thoughts about 'What if she left me'.
There is a 16 year age gap between me and her (I, 2 years ago split with my girlfriend after 10 years and she just came out of a messy relationship. I am 39 and she is 23) which has never been an issue, as I love her and I know she loves me.
So, am I being stupid and is this a phase that will pass?
I'd appreciate any advice or comments. Thanks.
At the moment I am feeling low in confidence and my self esteem has lowered. Is this normal after quite a nasty illness?
Stupid thoughts are going round my head(Not suicidal) in regards to my relationship with my girlfriend who I have been seeing for just over a year. There is no problem in our relationship, but over a month ago i was kinda happy go lucky, whereas now I am thinking things like 'how can a really nice girl like her be going out with me', and thoughts about 'What if she left me'.
There is a 16 year age gap between me and her (I, 2 years ago split with my girlfriend after 10 years and she just came out of a messy relationship. I am 39 and she is 23) which has never been an issue, as I love her and I know she loves me.
So, am I being stupid and is this a phase that will pass?
I'd appreciate any advice or comments. Thanks.
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bassie
01-07-2004, 12:27 PM
Dear Chaz
You are describing a typical post illness depression. You must have been quite ill. It is certainly not any form of stupidity. In fact you are wise to verbalise how you feel.
Doctors often give advice to people who are sick or recuperating "not to make any important decisions at a time like this". This is because people feel "flat", do not have their normal resilience and are inclined to have negative thoughts.
You need to be kind to yourself and allow yourself time to get better. A friend of mine broke a relationship in just such a circumstance and once she was better it all came together beautifully again and she could hardly imagine what had made her do it.
It sounds like you still have a little ways to go to get better. It can be quite a shock to a normally healthy person to be really ill.
Recuperating means a balance of rest and exercise that you will have to determine is OK for you.
It sounds like you still need quite a lot of rest and sleep.
To regain a normal appetite while you have nausea you might try eating 'very' small portions of nutritious food 4 or 5 times over the day (if you can tolerate that) rather than the regular 3 meals.
If you can, take a combination vitamin/mineral supplement.
Try to get regular fresh air.
Small amounts of refreshing drinks frequently is better than trying to get a large amount down.
Get some fresh flowers in your room. That is always cheering.
If you have some cologne, sprinkle that around.
Keep your mind occupied with some light reading like a magazine or TV watching.
Pleasant music can also be helpful and allows you to doze off as well.
It actually helps to have a good cry which is quite normal with weakness and fatigue and is not just for women!!
I do hope you are really on the mend and will recuperate completely.
You are describing a typical post illness depression. You must have been quite ill. It is certainly not any form of stupidity. In fact you are wise to verbalise how you feel.
Doctors often give advice to people who are sick or recuperating "not to make any important decisions at a time like this". This is because people feel "flat", do not have their normal resilience and are inclined to have negative thoughts.
You need to be kind to yourself and allow yourself time to get better. A friend of mine broke a relationship in just such a circumstance and once she was better it all came together beautifully again and she could hardly imagine what had made her do it.
It sounds like you still have a little ways to go to get better. It can be quite a shock to a normally healthy person to be really ill.
Recuperating means a balance of rest and exercise that you will have to determine is OK for you.
It sounds like you still need quite a lot of rest and sleep.
To regain a normal appetite while you have nausea you might try eating 'very' small portions of nutritious food 4 or 5 times over the day (if you can tolerate that) rather than the regular 3 meals.
If you can, take a combination vitamin/mineral supplement.
Try to get regular fresh air.
Small amounts of refreshing drinks frequently is better than trying to get a large amount down.
Get some fresh flowers in your room. That is always cheering.
If you have some cologne, sprinkle that around.
Keep your mind occupied with some light reading like a magazine or TV watching.
Pleasant music can also be helpful and allows you to doze off as well.
It actually helps to have a good cry which is quite normal with weakness and fatigue and is not just for women!!
I do hope you are really on the mend and will recuperate completely.