Cathyy
02-06-2004, 01:51 PM
Hello,
I have a 73 year old aunt that has not been diagnosed with alzhiemers or dementia but something is very wrong. She started repeating herself about 7 years ago. She calls me 7 and 8 times a day. Same thing over and over. In the last few years she's gotten paranoid. Thinks there's a rat or varment living in her apartment. Never sees it. Says it doesn't eat anything or poop but she knows it's there. We've had exterminators and even put traps and poison out ourselves to try and ease her mind. Nothing works. Now she thinks someone comes in her apartment while she's gone and sits on her couch. Says she can tell someone sat there. Thinks someone puts air in her tires at night. Not lets it out but puts it in. I could go on and on with these things she says. She lives in a senior citizen's apartment but noone there wants to be around her. It's really sad. She's not happy anywhere she goes. Now she's gotten to where she won't stay by herself at night. Wants someone to sleep with her because she's scared but she doesn't really know what she's afraid of. She still drives but I don't think she needs to be. Her son has taken her to several doctors and they say it's just old age. I don't think it is but my hands seem to be tied. She's so forgetful I don't see how she can be taking her meds right. She is worrying everyone to death. Starts calling around 4:00 in the afternoon trying to find a place to spend the night. If you let her stay with you she gets up all hours of the night so you get no sleep. I'm at a loss of what to do for her. Her son did talk her into a nursing home but she wouldn't stay out of the other patients rooms. Would go get in the bed with them and the nurses would have to physically remove her. This is a very sad situation. Any advice would be appreciated.
I have a 73 year old aunt that has not been diagnosed with alzhiemers or dementia but something is very wrong. She started repeating herself about 7 years ago. She calls me 7 and 8 times a day. Same thing over and over. In the last few years she's gotten paranoid. Thinks there's a rat or varment living in her apartment. Never sees it. Says it doesn't eat anything or poop but she knows it's there. We've had exterminators and even put traps and poison out ourselves to try and ease her mind. Nothing works. Now she thinks someone comes in her apartment while she's gone and sits on her couch. Says she can tell someone sat there. Thinks someone puts air in her tires at night. Not lets it out but puts it in. I could go on and on with these things she says. She lives in a senior citizen's apartment but noone there wants to be around her. It's really sad. She's not happy anywhere she goes. Now she's gotten to where she won't stay by herself at night. Wants someone to sleep with her because she's scared but she doesn't really know what she's afraid of. She still drives but I don't think she needs to be. Her son has taken her to several doctors and they say it's just old age. I don't think it is but my hands seem to be tied. She's so forgetful I don't see how she can be taking her meds right. She is worrying everyone to death. Starts calling around 4:00 in the afternoon trying to find a place to spend the night. If you let her stay with you she gets up all hours of the night so you get no sleep. I'm at a loss of what to do for her. Her son did talk her into a nursing home but she wouldn't stay out of the other patients rooms. Would go get in the bed with them and the nurses would have to physically remove her. This is a very sad situation. Any advice would be appreciated.
Sponsor
BarbaraH
02-07-2004, 05:14 PM
Hi,
I agree with the above. I do have a Mom with Alzhermer's. The memory loss, wandering, paranoia, restlessness, and repeatativeness are all part of Alzheimers at different stages of the disease. 3 years ago, Mom had just forgotten lots of thing (how to make coffee, make a long distance call, write a fraction, and a million other things). 2 years ago she opened the same Christmas gift bag 3 times in 10 minutes and was equally delighted each time, and was suspicious and combative when I wouldn't let her leave the house (carrying her purse, cold cream and shower cap) at 11pm. 18 months ago, she didn't know her own furniture or her own daughter and was concerned about being late to school and if her mother knew where she was. 12 months ago she forgot how to walk and now she does nothing for herself - has to be fed, dressed, etc. She can read, but has no understanding and cannot think to turn a page. Sad.
It is essential that she is somewhere where someone else will administer her medicines - she cannot be taking them correctly. Overdose or underdose can have awful symptoms that clear up when the doseages are corrected and the body has had time to get rid of extra medicines.
Talk with her son - he's sure to be very concerned as you are. Do an on-line search for "Alzheimer's symptoms". Someone must take away the car keys before she hurts herself or someone else. She will soon forget that. Hope her son already has Power of Attorney. Talk to an elder care lawyer for additional advise.
I told Mom's doctor that it didn't matter to me if it was called dementia or Alzheimer's - Mom matched everything for middle stage Alzheimers and she wasn't herself anymore.
You're not alone on the unwelcome path. Blessings - Barbara
I agree with the above. I do have a Mom with Alzhermer's. The memory loss, wandering, paranoia, restlessness, and repeatativeness are all part of Alzheimers at different stages of the disease. 3 years ago, Mom had just forgotten lots of thing (how to make coffee, make a long distance call, write a fraction, and a million other things). 2 years ago she opened the same Christmas gift bag 3 times in 10 minutes and was equally delighted each time, and was suspicious and combative when I wouldn't let her leave the house (carrying her purse, cold cream and shower cap) at 11pm. 18 months ago, she didn't know her own furniture or her own daughter and was concerned about being late to school and if her mother knew where she was. 12 months ago she forgot how to walk and now she does nothing for herself - has to be fed, dressed, etc. She can read, but has no understanding and cannot think to turn a page. Sad.
It is essential that she is somewhere where someone else will administer her medicines - she cannot be taking them correctly. Overdose or underdose can have awful symptoms that clear up when the doseages are corrected and the body has had time to get rid of extra medicines.
Talk with her son - he's sure to be very concerned as you are. Do an on-line search for "Alzheimer's symptoms". Someone must take away the car keys before she hurts herself or someone else. She will soon forget that. Hope her son already has Power of Attorney. Talk to an elder care lawyer for additional advise.
I told Mom's doctor that it didn't matter to me if it was called dementia or Alzheimer's - Mom matched everything for middle stage Alzheimers and she wasn't herself anymore.
You're not alone on the unwelcome path. Blessings - Barbara
SnowyLynne63
02-07-2004, 06:03 PM
My first thought is to get her to a Neurologist,to be tested,then after dx have her put on one of the AD meds.They are not a cure,but they can help.She does need 24/7 care.........
isolated one
02-07-2004, 11:24 PM
I don't want to scare you but my mother had Alzheimer's and it started out much the same way. She was living alone in her home for a few years after my father died and often expressed concern about being alone. Other than slight memory problems which I simply thought was due to her age (75), she sure seemed to have a good mental focus. I lived quite a distance from her at the time, so I didn't get a clear picture of what was going on, I guess. One day, I was takling to her on the phone and she sounded very nervous, saying "they need to talk to me, so I have to hang up now." I didn't feel right about this but still couldn't figure out what was going on. Two days later, I received a phone call from my mom's neighbor. I was told that she was in the hospital and couldn't imagine why. It turns out that my mother had been pounding on the neighbor's door, frightened as can be, telling them to "get the people out of her house!" In her mind, there had been groups of "faceless" people (adults and children) who had been in her home, doing little more than walking around or sitting down. The diagnosis was "senile dementia" (which later became Alzheimer's). Once this episode faded away and I had gone home to stay with my mom, things seemed back to normal and she didn't seem to worry about anything. Several weeks later though, I woke up from my mom pounding at my door, yelling "Please, tell these people to get out of my house!" Unfortunately, that was the start of many such frightening events which finally ended up having her placed in a nursing home. I did all I could to keep her at home, including a live in nurse, but the decision to take her away was the hardest and saddest I ever had to make.
Cathyy
02-10-2004, 05:02 PM
Thanks for all the advice. I will let her children read this. Maybe hearing it from someone else will be what they need. They all agree that there is a problem but noone wants to make the first move. Something has to be done soon. Someone asked me the other day what was wrong with my aunt. He ran into her in town and she asked him over and over how his father was doing. He told her several times that he died 5 years ago. Finally he just answered he's doing fine. She spent a week in Arlington with her daughter and thought she was someone else several times. How can they just sit back and not take control of the situation? I don't understand. Thanks for listening.
Mara
02-10-2004, 05:30 PM
Thanks for all the advice. I will let her children read this. Maybe hearing it from someone else will be what they need. They all agree that there is a problem but no one wants to make the first move. Something has to be done soon. Someone asked me the other day what was wrong with my aunt. He ran into her in town and she asked him over and over how his father was doing. He told her several times that he died 5 years ago. Finally he just answered he's doing fine. She spent a week in Arlington with her daughter and thought she was someone else several times. How can they just sit back and not take control of the situation? I don't understand. Thanks for listening.
The application and waiting period may be long so they need to act fast. Someone has to take her in and care for her until a reputable facility is found. Some places won't take alz. pts. while others do (NY), so dx could make the difference or lack of one...You know what I mean...Someone should host a family meeting to address mom's health and to help decide what should be done, how she is going to be taken care of, who does what, how each person helps out...Bullet all key issues on paper so everyone stays on track, because it's a very emotional time. Family must pull together and use all available resources. No matter what, don't let this fall on one persons shoulders.
Maybe the doctor could prescribe something that would help her sleep at night.
Ps: If she has the keys, she could drive off and become lost-they need to be taken. She needs a medic bracelet made. She could wander off. Someone also needs to help her with the bills and make sure she is not paying the same one 4 times over or have people call on the phone and commit fraud. Your right, Sooner rather then later. Peace, Gemi :wave:
The application and waiting period may be long so they need to act fast. Someone has to take her in and care for her until a reputable facility is found. Some places won't take alz. pts. while others do (NY), so dx could make the difference or lack of one...You know what I mean...Someone should host a family meeting to address mom's health and to help decide what should be done, how she is going to be taken care of, who does what, how each person helps out...Bullet all key issues on paper so everyone stays on track, because it's a very emotional time. Family must pull together and use all available resources. No matter what, don't let this fall on one persons shoulders.
Maybe the doctor could prescribe something that would help her sleep at night.
Ps: If she has the keys, she could drive off and become lost-they need to be taken. She needs a medic bracelet made. She could wander off. Someone also needs to help her with the bills and make sure she is not paying the same one 4 times over or have people call on the phone and commit fraud. Your right, Sooner rather then later. Peace, Gemi :wave:
mary b.
02-11-2004, 12:37 AM
Hi Cathyy,
You are smart to pick all of this up. It will only get worse I'm afraid. My grandmother did many of the same things you are talking about. She would say she heard the neighbors talking about her in the middle of the night, she would think her phone was bugged, people were stealing from her, couldn't remember to dial long distance. It goes on and on. It is so very important to get her where she can be loved, watched, and treated with dignity. My grandmother would forget how to walk and have to be reminded. The ceiling fan would bother her, the tv talking............
Read as much as you can and talk to many people for help. Get her affairs and power of atty and healthcare power of atty together now. God Bless you. My grandmother passed away Jan 14, 2004. Mary
You are smart to pick all of this up. It will only get worse I'm afraid. My grandmother did many of the same things you are talking about. She would say she heard the neighbors talking about her in the middle of the night, she would think her phone was bugged, people were stealing from her, couldn't remember to dial long distance. It goes on and on. It is so very important to get her where she can be loved, watched, and treated with dignity. My grandmother would forget how to walk and have to be reminded. The ceiling fan would bother her, the tv talking............
Read as much as you can and talk to many people for help. Get her affairs and power of atty and healthcare power of atty together now. God Bless you. My grandmother passed away Jan 14, 2004. Mary
gizmolove
02-11-2004, 11:13 AM
Alzheimer's
Dearest Kathy,
I am sitting here crying reading your post. It is heartbreaking to me because she sounds so very much like my own dear mom who is dead now. Mom started out like that in 1992. She was never diagnosed nor put on appropriate meds until just before her death in 1998. You can not immagine the hell we (I) went through. Not knowing what was wrong. Not being to deal with her or help her. She litterally drove me out of my mind and the doctors wouldn't listen or help.
Real heartbreak is that just before her death she finally got diagnosed with "very advanced Alzheimer's" (last stage), and finally got the meds that she needed all along. The change was so amazing. (still crying) :(
Nothing will replace these years that you have left. Please do not let them go by any longer without help. My mom has been gone now for over 5 years, and I will never get over the wasted pain of all of those lost years.
Please get her diagnosed and on the proper meds.
Love
Giz
:angel:
Dearest Kathy,
I am sitting here crying reading your post. It is heartbreaking to me because she sounds so very much like my own dear mom who is dead now. Mom started out like that in 1992. She was never diagnosed nor put on appropriate meds until just before her death in 1998. You can not immagine the hell we (I) went through. Not knowing what was wrong. Not being to deal with her or help her. She litterally drove me out of my mind and the doctors wouldn't listen or help.
Real heartbreak is that just before her death she finally got diagnosed with "very advanced Alzheimer's" (last stage), and finally got the meds that she needed all along. The change was so amazing. (still crying) :(
Nothing will replace these years that you have left. Please do not let them go by any longer without help. My mom has been gone now for over 5 years, and I will never get over the wasted pain of all of those lost years.
Please get her diagnosed and on the proper meds.
Love
Giz
:angel:
The Cardinal
02-11-2004, 03:08 PM
First, please accept my sincere and heartfelt sympathy with regard to your Aunt. My late Mother first started exhibiting symptoms of dementia in her mid-seventies (it's my understanding that unfortunately, a diagnosis of "Alzheimers" can only be made after a post-mortem examination).
My Mother was a widow who had always been very meticulous with bill paying, but we suddenly discovered that some bills weren't being paid while others were being paid more than once. At this point, my siblings and I quickly concluded that I should persuade my Mother to give me durable power of attorney (POA), and to add my name to her bank accounts, "just in case." Fortunately, she trusted me and readily agreed. NOW HERE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART FOR YOU TO THINK ABOUT: You, her son, or someone who loves her and has her best interests at heart should do the same immediately, while she outwardly appears to be of "sound state of mind!" Otherwise, to gain control of her affairs later will require legal proceedings before a judge to first establish her diminished mentally capacity, and secondly, to have a trustee over her financial affairs appointed! You should really attempt to avoid this at all costs!!! Between the cost of hiring a lawyer, and the potential squabbling and interference of other relatives who may not agree with what needs to be done, you (or someone) could end up with a legal nightmare on your/their hands!
FYI - I found a $25 - $30 computer software program and created the POA, and we signed and had it notarized at her bank at the same time that she added me to her bank accounts. From that moment own, I enrolled in the bank's online bill paying service, I used the change-of-address procedures for all her creditors to have the bills mailed to my home address (BTW, I lived in another state), and I began paying all of her bills online. I made copies of the POA, leaving the original on file at the bank, and whenever I conducted business upon her behalf, I provided copies of the POA to the affected organizations as needed. I hired a very caring Aunt, along with some individuals she trusted, to stay with my Mom for the five years leading up to her death (like your Aunt, she began to hallucinate [she saw "little people" - one of whom was a man who was continually trying to look up her skirt! - God bless her soul :-)], and she also became afraid to spend the night alone). Because I had control of my Mom's financial accounts, I could partially pay her caretakers with money from her retirement and SS benefits, while my siblings and I made up the balance.
Recognizing what was happening with my Mom and taking control early-on ranks as one of the smartest things I've ever done.
My Mother was a widow who had always been very meticulous with bill paying, but we suddenly discovered that some bills weren't being paid while others were being paid more than once. At this point, my siblings and I quickly concluded that I should persuade my Mother to give me durable power of attorney (POA), and to add my name to her bank accounts, "just in case." Fortunately, she trusted me and readily agreed. NOW HERE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART FOR YOU TO THINK ABOUT: You, her son, or someone who loves her and has her best interests at heart should do the same immediately, while she outwardly appears to be of "sound state of mind!" Otherwise, to gain control of her affairs later will require legal proceedings before a judge to first establish her diminished mentally capacity, and secondly, to have a trustee over her financial affairs appointed! You should really attempt to avoid this at all costs!!! Between the cost of hiring a lawyer, and the potential squabbling and interference of other relatives who may not agree with what needs to be done, you (or someone) could end up with a legal nightmare on your/their hands!
FYI - I found a $25 - $30 computer software program and created the POA, and we signed and had it notarized at her bank at the same time that she added me to her bank accounts. From that moment own, I enrolled in the bank's online bill paying service, I used the change-of-address procedures for all her creditors to have the bills mailed to my home address (BTW, I lived in another state), and I began paying all of her bills online. I made copies of the POA, leaving the original on file at the bank, and whenever I conducted business upon her behalf, I provided copies of the POA to the affected organizations as needed. I hired a very caring Aunt, along with some individuals she trusted, to stay with my Mom for the five years leading up to her death (like your Aunt, she began to hallucinate [she saw "little people" - one of whom was a man who was continually trying to look up her skirt! - God bless her soul :-)], and she also became afraid to spend the night alone). Because I had control of my Mom's financial accounts, I could partially pay her caretakers with money from her retirement and SS benefits, while my siblings and I made up the balance.
Recognizing what was happening with my Mom and taking control early-on ranks as one of the smartest things I've ever done.
Cathyy
02-11-2004, 03:48 PM
Hello again. Well I feel a little better about the situation today. My aunt's children in Arlington are checking out nursing homes in their area. I guess the week she spent with them helped them realize there is a problem. I hope they won't drag their feet with this. I'm so glad I found this website. So many things that I've read here have described my aunt completely. She loses money and has overdrawn her account several times. I cleaned out her purse for her because she couldn't find her medicare card. She had about 50 expired cards from different places. I also found some gold crowns in the bottom of her purse that she accused the dentist of not giving back to her. Made a big scene at the dentist office and they were in her purse the whole time. So sad. I could just go on and on about what she does and says. Now she's gotten pretty mean. Talks about people and shows prejudice real bad. Claims people talked hateful to her when I was there and know they didn't. I just hope she won't start hitting or pushing. That may be next. Thanks for all the advice. It has helped so much.
camachinist
02-15-2004, 02:39 PM
Some quick words for the OP....(original poster)
To the doctor - anti-psychotic......if aunt doesn't have cardiac issues, Seroquel or equivilent should help with hallucinations
To the children of the patient - Safe Return program/Medic Alert program
Finances - Durable POA finance or general POA with no incompetency exclusion, if possible at this late date. Otherwise, guardianship may be necessary or preferred.
Care - Local Agency on Aging/ AD Association. Great source of information.
Personally, I'd triage her health status, remove her vehicle, hire a health aide to dispense her meds (if family can't do it) and reassess in a month or two. There could be a combination of reversible factors contributing to the current situation and/or its severity. I realize 24/7 care would be ideal but it may not be possible financially. Do the best you and the children can and be satisfied with your efforts.
Best wishes!
Pat
To the doctor - anti-psychotic......if aunt doesn't have cardiac issues, Seroquel or equivilent should help with hallucinations
To the children of the patient - Safe Return program/Medic Alert program
Finances - Durable POA finance or general POA with no incompetency exclusion, if possible at this late date. Otherwise, guardianship may be necessary or preferred.
Care - Local Agency on Aging/ AD Association. Great source of information.
Personally, I'd triage her health status, remove her vehicle, hire a health aide to dispense her meds (if family can't do it) and reassess in a month or two. There could be a combination of reversible factors contributing to the current situation and/or its severity. I realize 24/7 care would be ideal but it may not be possible financially. Do the best you and the children can and be satisfied with your efforts.
Best wishes!
Pat
STEPHANIE BALLI
04-15-2004, 06:10 PM
Dementia is a symtom, and Alzheimers is a disease. You can have dementia and not have Alzheimers. There are about 100 different diseases with the symtom of dementia.
Just something I learned that was interesting, I thought the 2 were interchangable.
Just something I learned that was interesting, I thought the 2 were interchangable.
Nailer002
03-25-2007, 12:21 PM
Hi , My mother in law has had Alzheimers now for 3 years and we just recently had her placed in a home . My wife is very close to her mother and visits her Everyday (which i told her she needs to slack off a little as this is burning her out) we were wondering what meds they placed your mother on ? Her mother will sit and start to cry for hours on end not knowing why when asked. We brought her home to our house last Sunday for a large family get together and Meal and she started crying for no reason at all which in turn triggered my father in law and brother in law and wife to start crying. Did your mother cry like this and if so is this part of the disease ? We asked at the Nursing home and they told us they hav`nt seen this before. They are another complete subject , since shes been there she has fallen 4 times and takin to the ER for x-rays (all was Fine) . I think for $6,300 a month they can have someone with there patients at all times (but not the case). and on weekends its even worse , we had her moved from one home to another already but are learning that these homes only thought is the bottom line ($).
Dearest Kathy,
I am sitting here crying reading your post. It is heartbreaking to me because she sounds so very much like my own dear mom who is dead now. Mom started out like that in 1992. She was never diagnosed nor put on appropriate meds until just before her death in 1998. You can not immagine the hell we (I) went through. Not knowing what was wrong. Not being to deal with her or help her. She litterally drove me out of my mind and the doctors wouldn't listen or help.
Real heartbreak is that just before her death she finally got diagnosed with "very advanced Alzheimer's" (last stage), and finally got the meds that she needed all along. The change was so amazing. (still crying) :(
Nothing will replace these years that you have left. Please do not let them go by any longer without help. My mom has been gone now for over 5 years, and I will never get over the wasted pain of all of those lost years.
Please get her diagnosed and on the proper meds.
Love
Giz
:angel:[/QUOTE]
Dearest Kathy,
I am sitting here crying reading your post. It is heartbreaking to me because she sounds so very much like my own dear mom who is dead now. Mom started out like that in 1992. She was never diagnosed nor put on appropriate meds until just before her death in 1998. You can not immagine the hell we (I) went through. Not knowing what was wrong. Not being to deal with her or help her. She litterally drove me out of my mind and the doctors wouldn't listen or help.
Real heartbreak is that just before her death she finally got diagnosed with "very advanced Alzheimer's" (last stage), and finally got the meds that she needed all along. The change was so amazing. (still crying) :(
Nothing will replace these years that you have left. Please do not let them go by any longer without help. My mom has been gone now for over 5 years, and I will never get over the wasted pain of all of those lost years.
Please get her diagnosed and on the proper meds.
Love
Giz
:angel:[/QUOTE]
gizmolove
03-26-2007, 04:49 AM
Nailer,
Hi , My mother in law has had Alzheimers now for 3 years and we just recently had her placed in a home . My wife is very close to her mother and visits her Everyday (which i told her she needs to slack off a little as this is burning her out) we were wondering what meds they placed your mother on ? ....... we had her moved from one home to another already but are learning that these homes only thought is the bottom line ($).
Having a good doctor and a proper diagnosis is imparative. You are just spinning your wheels without that necessary back up. It really is how you look at and understand "Alzheimers". If your health care team is so ill informed that they just think that she has Alzheimers which is a memory and "Dementia" problem. THEN KICK THEM TO THE CURB! They are doing nothing for you except handed you a diagnosis on a silver platter, and then to walk away knowing how very brilliant they are to have found the answer to that paticular medical problem. YOU, on the other hand are left with the technical answer (Alzheimer's), but no practical information or help, what-so-ever. In otherwords it is not acceptable for them to find the diagnosis and then leave you hanging. It is imparative/vital, that they understand that diagnosis and act upon it to insure that THE PATIENT, then have the appropriate treatment and care. This involves you understanding what Alzheimer's is; how it is effecting your loved one; what treatments and or drugs are available; and supervision of daily care to maintain the patient at their maximun quality of life level as possiable and within reason.
Doctors do not have any problem with being doctors. They do however, have a great deal of trouble being people. The patient is a person. That person exhists outside of that paticular diagnosis. They need to know and understand that diagnosis (what does that mean?). In the case of Alzheimer's/Dementia, it is imposiable for that person to understand simple things let along a medical diagnosis. Therefore, it is imparitive for others (i.e. family and friends and caregivers) to understand to a point that they can supervise the person diagnose. Their care; their treatments; their care enviorment; their medical and mental state and abilities; their medications; their mental and physical health; and their emotional and mental state of mind; as well as their behavior problems and limitations caused by this most horriable disease.
Now, something that may be helpful to you. THE RIGHT MEDICATIONS, IN THE RIGHT DOSAGE, DISPENSED IN THE RIGHT MANNOR.....IS IMPARATIVE! I can not stress that enough.
It is not unusual for a victum of Alz to suffer from depression. Depression only serves to make the Alz worst, and the Alz care more difficult.
HARD QUESTIONS:
1) When your wife visits, is she there to comfort, or to act as an intermediary? In otherwords, does she just accept the diagnosis and that her mother has this disease; and, that these symptoms and behaviorial difficulties are just part of that diagnosis. Or, is she there to be an advocate to make sure that her mother is getting the kind of brain support and treatment that her mother needs? Because if you are expecting her doctor, nurse(s), or caregivers to just automatically do the things that are necessary, your wife is going to be sadly dissapointed. And, it's for sure that no one else is going to especially your mother-in-law, because she is incapable to paticipate in her own care at this stage.
2) Are the nurses makeing appropriate notes of the durgs being dispenced and their effectiveness? Are they noteing behavioral changes, cognitive changes, and physical changes on a daily basis and relating this information to her doctor so that the doctor can provide the optimum care decisions possiable as to his patients condition. (Physically, mentally, emotionally, and with some quality of life).
3) Is the consulting physician responsive to family concerns? Does he check frequently on directives for her care to assure that her condition is as optimum as possiable? Does he listen to the nursing care professionals, and to the family concerns. Is he quick to notice changes in his patient, and react appropriately to over-see her medication, diagnostic imparatives, and behavioral issues, as well as her personal problems with this disease (in being able to cope on a day-to-day basis) ? Does he seek to improve her daily care issues; or, does he just accept the diagnosis and leave her daily care to others (to deal with)?
4) Is she being monitored daily as to her real (total) condition by:
A family
B nurses
C health care providers
D professional theropists and specilists
E doctor(s)
If the answer to any of these questions is "no". Then the patient here is not getting the quality care she needs, and deserves. And, that creates the care and behavioral problems that exhist in 90% of the Alzheimer's patients, today. We seam to be so devistated emotionally by what is happing to our loved ones that we fail to look through the pain and suffering that we are going through (as caregivers), in order to see the real pain and suffering going on with the patient.
Summary:
If you were loosing your mind, couldn't make your brain work properly; were stuck in a time warp; were stranded, adrift at sea, all alone; in a completely strange and alien enviornment; wouldn't you be depressed too?
I truely hope this helps
Blessings and hugs to you and your wife,
Giz
Hi , My mother in law has had Alzheimers now for 3 years and we just recently had her placed in a home . My wife is very close to her mother and visits her Everyday (which i told her she needs to slack off a little as this is burning her out) we were wondering what meds they placed your mother on ? ....... we had her moved from one home to another already but are learning that these homes only thought is the bottom line ($).
Having a good doctor and a proper diagnosis is imparative. You are just spinning your wheels without that necessary back up. It really is how you look at and understand "Alzheimers". If your health care team is so ill informed that they just think that she has Alzheimers which is a memory and "Dementia" problem. THEN KICK THEM TO THE CURB! They are doing nothing for you except handed you a diagnosis on a silver platter, and then to walk away knowing how very brilliant they are to have found the answer to that paticular medical problem. YOU, on the other hand are left with the technical answer (Alzheimer's), but no practical information or help, what-so-ever. In otherwords it is not acceptable for them to find the diagnosis and then leave you hanging. It is imparative/vital, that they understand that diagnosis and act upon it to insure that THE PATIENT, then have the appropriate treatment and care. This involves you understanding what Alzheimer's is; how it is effecting your loved one; what treatments and or drugs are available; and supervision of daily care to maintain the patient at their maximun quality of life level as possiable and within reason.
Doctors do not have any problem with being doctors. They do however, have a great deal of trouble being people. The patient is a person. That person exhists outside of that paticular diagnosis. They need to know and understand that diagnosis (what does that mean?). In the case of Alzheimer's/Dementia, it is imposiable for that person to understand simple things let along a medical diagnosis. Therefore, it is imparitive for others (i.e. family and friends and caregivers) to understand to a point that they can supervise the person diagnose. Their care; their treatments; their care enviorment; their medical and mental state and abilities; their medications; their mental and physical health; and their emotional and mental state of mind; as well as their behavior problems and limitations caused by this most horriable disease.
Now, something that may be helpful to you. THE RIGHT MEDICATIONS, IN THE RIGHT DOSAGE, DISPENSED IN THE RIGHT MANNOR.....IS IMPARATIVE! I can not stress that enough.
It is not unusual for a victum of Alz to suffer from depression. Depression only serves to make the Alz worst, and the Alz care more difficult.
HARD QUESTIONS:
1) When your wife visits, is she there to comfort, or to act as an intermediary? In otherwords, does she just accept the diagnosis and that her mother has this disease; and, that these symptoms and behaviorial difficulties are just part of that diagnosis. Or, is she there to be an advocate to make sure that her mother is getting the kind of brain support and treatment that her mother needs? Because if you are expecting her doctor, nurse(s), or caregivers to just automatically do the things that are necessary, your wife is going to be sadly dissapointed. And, it's for sure that no one else is going to especially your mother-in-law, because she is incapable to paticipate in her own care at this stage.
2) Are the nurses makeing appropriate notes of the durgs being dispenced and their effectiveness? Are they noteing behavioral changes, cognitive changes, and physical changes on a daily basis and relating this information to her doctor so that the doctor can provide the optimum care decisions possiable as to his patients condition. (Physically, mentally, emotionally, and with some quality of life).
3) Is the consulting physician responsive to family concerns? Does he check frequently on directives for her care to assure that her condition is as optimum as possiable? Does he listen to the nursing care professionals, and to the family concerns. Is he quick to notice changes in his patient, and react appropriately to over-see her medication, diagnostic imparatives, and behavioral issues, as well as her personal problems with this disease (in being able to cope on a day-to-day basis) ? Does he seek to improve her daily care issues; or, does he just accept the diagnosis and leave her daily care to others (to deal with)?
4) Is she being monitored daily as to her real (total) condition by:
A family
B nurses
C health care providers
D professional theropists and specilists
E doctor(s)
If the answer to any of these questions is "no". Then the patient here is not getting the quality care she needs, and deserves. And, that creates the care and behavioral problems that exhist in 90% of the Alzheimer's patients, today. We seam to be so devistated emotionally by what is happing to our loved ones that we fail to look through the pain and suffering that we are going through (as caregivers), in order to see the real pain and suffering going on with the patient.
Summary:
If you were loosing your mind, couldn't make your brain work properly; were stuck in a time warp; were stranded, adrift at sea, all alone; in a completely strange and alien enviornment; wouldn't you be depressed too?
I truely hope this helps
Blessings and hugs to you and your wife,
Giz