:confused:

So I was so in control. My meal plans were really helping and I did not think about b/p at all. My fiancee went to a course tonight so I was home alone....Was it anxiety? Boredom? Not knowing what to do with myself? Opportunity time? Or craving that B/P just one more time? Well before I knew it, I had polished off 3 milk shakes, 4 icecream sandwiches, half a jar of peanut butter, a bagel with creamcheese, nuts, chocolates, different chips, 2 large bowls of cereal, 2 waffles, more chips, and anything else in front of me. Within 2 hrs. I had B/P 3 times and really feel horrible. I felt fine before I started! I was a bit nervous about work, money, dentist bills, my weight, whatever. But now I feel out of it, weak, depressed and scared. Im scared because I see how easy it is to just fall right into it out of nowhere. What do I say to my fiancee when he gets home. He knows how well Ive been doing and I don't want him to be disapointed. What a horrible, horrible thing this is! I feel so sick and mad at myself. I know how bad it makes me feel now, but it still draws me in! Funny how yesterday I was giving advice and now I blew it!

It's okay. You didn't blow it! Just because you slipped one day does not mean you haven't been making progress. When your fiance gets home just be honest. Come clean and say you feel so bad about yourself, but you want to get better and his support is so important right now. This is a terrible addiction and you can't go about this all by yourself sometimes!

What do I say to my fiancee when he gets home. He knows how well Ive been doing and I don't want him to be disapointed. What a horrible, horrible thing this is! I feel so sick and mad at myself. I know how bad it makes me feel now, but it still draws me in! Funny how yesterday I was giving advice and now I blew it!

When he gets home...just be honest to him...coz he may well just notice with missing food etc. And plus, I know u dont want him to be disappointed, but I think he'd be more disappointed if u didn't tell him. and I know that he wants to help u when u fall down...so give him the opportunity to listen to u. Also, I know u care so much for him..but u have got to think how u are....we tend to think of others instead of thinking about ourselves. U have been doing well for so so long........this doesnt mean that u r back at square one. It could be a mixture of boredom or anything. Can u not ring your fiancee at work if u are having a bad time? That way u can talk it through with him....and the urges to binge etc may have worn off by the time u finish the phone call or something. Sorry..my advice isnt that good.....but.....good luck!!x