I have a 12 year old son that still soils his pants. It is very embarassing. But doctor after doctor tell me that he will outgrow this. So I am wondering if there is a chance that he could have ADD or ADHD. His school work is also hurting as well. How do i know if i should take him in to get tested? Does anyone else have or heard of this problem and having to do with ADD? Please help me! :wave:

This is not normal, nor is this an indication of ADD. Everytime a child has a problem it seems they are just labeled as ADD and thats the end of it. They never find or treat the real problem. Sometimes children who have ADD/ADHD take a while longer to potty train. Wetting the bed at night is pretty common for all children, ADD/ADHD children tend to take a while longer to mature, so they wet the bed until an older age. They may also have daytime accidents when they are young (pre-school -1st grade)

Your son is soiling himself at age 12. This is not an ADHD problem. Has he seen a doctor about this at all? There are many things that cause ADHD like symptoms, you mentioned problems with schoolwork, well this does not mean that it is ADHD. There are tons of things that can cause problems with schoolwork. Your son needs to get a complete physical and find out whats going on.

Has he always done this or did it start after some sort of trauma or major life change?

Eneuresis and Encopresis (sp?) are more frequent with AD/HD and autism spectrum kids but on their own they are not an indicator of AD/HD.

It is possible that stress and anxiety from pressure at school are playing a part in this.

May I ask where you got that idea from, that soiling his bed must mean he has AD/HD? It's one of the more, uh, *interesting* misconsceptions that I've heard so far!

Redhead, now and days everytime a child has any sort of problem everyone around them is likely to suspect ADD. (parents, teachers, relatives etc etc) This might be one of the reasons why so many people think ADD doesnt exist....

Redhead, now and days everytime a child has any sort of problem everyone around them is likely to suspect ADD. (parents, teachers, relatives etc etc) This might be one of the reasons why so many people think ADD doesnt exist....
Yeah you have a point. You see the same on autism communities, everybody who's either aggressive, manipulative and abusive is suspect of having Asperger's, and everyone who is shy, has social phobias, is naturally introverted or feels put upon by society self-diagnoses themselves with it.

Hi concerened mom,

I know this was posted last month, but I am just reading this and I hope you see it. I am NOT saying your child has ADD/ADHD and they should be checked out first, but my daughter does had ADHD and she had problems urinating in bed until she was at least 10 years old. I didn't know what to do either and it was also very embarassing for her. I just thought she slept too hard. I tried everything you could ever think of from setting the clock and waking her up, to medicines(which was insane), to doctor after doctor after doctor. I finally found this device that you can buy at your local pharmacy. I don't remember what it is called, but I will explain what it does. It is like a pad you stick in their undies and it has a censor on it. It is not unconfortable at all. What it does.....is when they start to urinate just a little, an alram goes off and wakes them up to go the the bathroom. You can set the alarm louder too if you want. It cannot harm them in anyway. I used this for only a month and my daughter started getting up on her own to urinate. I couldn't believe I had finally found something. It is supposed to train their body to get used to waking up when they need to go. I hope this helps a little hun. Even if your child is not ADD/ADHD, this could still work for them. I'm sorry I don't remember the name.

Chantel

Hi, I am a 25 year-old male. I used to have your son's problem. I would get to playing outside or doing something else I enjoyed, and I simply wouldn't take the time to go to the bathroom until it was too late. This was between the ages of 12 and 13. I also was an occasional bedwetter, and that lasted a little longer. I grew out of both-- as I recall, the solilng ended shortly after my parents took me to a doctor, and I sort of figured out I should pay more attention to interrupting what I was doing to "heed nature's call".

As for the bedwetting, I reduced the problem by getting into the habit of urinating right before bed, and sometimes again in the middle of the night-- my family was much more understanding about that because my dad did the same thing when he was a teen and he grew out of it, so they knew I would, too.

I do have ADD, inattentive type only. My symptoms have also been described as an "executive function" learning disorder which hurts my ability to manage time and assess my own progress in regards to completing a task. Because I am also gifted, I was able to work around my disability for many years, and actually wasn't diagnosed until recently, when my difficulties in grad school were so extreme that I realized I was having a medical problem and not a "willpower" problem. I do have a lifetime's worth of report cards saying "smart kid not working to his potential".

Both the bedwetting and the soiling are indicators that your son might have ADD. Why? Because some of the characteristics of ADD are troubles with impulse control and prioritizing... with ADD, you are much more likely to give in to your impulse to do what you enjoy than to obey your inner conscience which says "hey you better get to the bathroom" or "you better do your homework".

I'm not saying run out and put your son on meds. He is young and I would strongly advocate for high doses of love, understanding and behavior-oriented therapy and POSITIVE home discipline/reinforcement. Look for educational therapists who can help him organize materials and plan his schedule.

Definitely, do have him evaluated, so you know whether it is ADD that you are dealing with. If so, and if other measures fail, you may eventually want to try the medicines and you'll have the benefit of being able to research in advance.

PS I take Concerta, which has eliminated many of my symptoms, and I am just starting Strattera now to try to get rid of some remaining "absent-minded professor" -type behavior . I have had practically zero side effects but these things tend to hit kids harder than adults. That being said, when these drugs work, they are like magic. Don't be so afraid that you let his self-esteem be destroyed before you give medication a try.

Good luck!

My son has encopresis as well. Also diagnosed with Asperger's and ADD. I understand how difficult it is. My son Is often in pain. I had a pediatrition who took it very casually for years. Once, by chance, we had to see a different pediatrition who I spoke to about it. He was ready with a plan. I was sooooo relieved that he took this problem seriously. My son is eight and had been on mineral oil since 3yrs, then benefiber, senekot etc. The first pediatrition only delt with it when it was an immediate problem. Now the second guy is making sure it gets the attention it should. Even though his advice of Miralax produced no results, he sent us to a GI specialist. My son is now more comfortable and doing better, but it is an ongoing process of treatment since the muscles need to gain back their elasticity from being stretched out from the withholding.
Yes, this is more common for Pervasive developmental disorders or ADHD.

It is hard to get people who know about it to admit it.
When taking out books, or researching information, I found people who shyly admitted to me that they knew of this.

Hope this helps!! It helped me, thanks!

I'm having the same problem with my 8 yr. old step daughter.She soils her self also if you find help please let me know. We can't go any were it's so embaressing.

Look at your local pharmacy and purchase that device I described. It is put in the underwear and it sets off and alarm when the child starts to urinate just a little and wakes them up. This works! I tried everything you can think of. Believe me, I've been there. I don;t know what it is called, but I'm sure it can't be hard to find. Ask the pharmacist. They know a lot about this stuff.

Chantel

i am 26 yrs old.. i have had a problem with bedwetting my whole life. i never grew out of it. it is gross and embarassing. not drinking anything after 7 or 8 really helps too. i wish there was something i could do for it. i have no insurance anymore so i cant afford the medicine. the medicine used to treat it is called desmopressin. or DDVAP nasal spray. One inhale before bed..and you wake up dry! It was a wonder drug for me, as it allowed me do do things i could not do before (sleep over peoples houses, go on vacation, go out drinking :jester: )..look into it. :o)

Tofranil is also a medication used to treat bedwetting and depression. It is also used for ADHD in small doses.

I agree. But why ADD and why not some other 'disorder'? I don't get that.

I don't know if this applies, but my son had some lapses when he was that age. Turns out it was because he really only liked to go to the bathroom, esp. #2, at home. It wasn't a phobia, but he held it in if he could and sometimes then couldn't get home and didn't want to say anything and then oops! Once when we were on a joking-around tear in the car he was semi-uncontrollably laughing and said 'stop! stop!' and I hit the brakes but he meant stop telling these jokes he was laughing so hard it made him pee. Then he couldn't hold himself in after that. He hasn't yet gotten over not liking to go at a public restroom.

I tried that nasal medication on my daughter and for some reason, it gave her nightmares! It was horrible. I tried the medication and it was horrible too. That device I am talking about it not expensive and it really works. I wish I could remember the name of it. My daughter stopped wetting the bed in like 2 weeks. She wet the bed until she was 10 years old. I thought nothing could be done until I tried that device.

Chantel

Hi hun:)

Yes children do have many times in their lives when they have "accidents". This is normal. What we are talking about is that most children with ADD/ADHD have bedwetting problems that are mostly EVERY night, and they don't grow out of it like normal kids do. Like I posted earlier, my daughter was 10 years old when I finally found something that worked for her. I tried everything I could think of. Even setting the clock and trying to wake her up but most of the time, I was too late or she would urinate in the bed after. I cut down the drinking before bed and even made her go use the bathroom before bed.................this just didn't work. It was a more serious problem than the normal "oops". I hope this explains a little.

Chantel

Tofranil is imipramine, a tricyclic antidepressant. it is very cheap. It is supposed to treat childhood bedwetting, but it never worked for me. I did use pamelor (nortriptyline) and it did not stop it totally but brought it down to manageable levels like twice a week. after a few months the effect wore off...and back to wetting almost every night. then i was changed to desmopressin. Desmopressin is also now available in pill form (when I was a kid, it only came as a nasty-tasting nasal spray.) as 0.1 and 0.2 mg. Desmopressin is more effective than the tricyclics as it is a synthetic of a natural pituitary hormone called vasopressin (sp?) which is our natural antidiuretic. as I said, I have had bedwetting and urinary issues all my life..and yes, i do have adult add. of course, this does not mean that every add will pee the bed or every kid who pees the bed has add.

You should really look in to the desmopressin - either the pills or the spray. Or another method of effective bedwetting control for the child. Even those small underwear-thin type diapers if you are opposed to medicating the child.

Let me tell you that when I was a kid, I could take the medicine and be okay to sleep over to my friends house or grandmas or cousins house and i didnt have to worry about peeing the bed. it can do a lot to a child's psyche when you still have urination problems in your teens. Having that medicine meant I could say yes to staying overnite at a friends or i would not pee myself on a plane ride across country if i fell asleep (oops!) ..and even allowed me to go to summer camp and i didnt have any accidents! how embarassing would that have been!?!

It may be that the problem actually is the bladder or kidneys themselves. The bladder could be underdeveloped and putting a strain on the kidneys. A urologist could help you determine that... it is very important to know if this is causing the bedwetting because that can usually be fixed.

mine was normal, so the doctors figured it was psychological..and crammed trazodone, haldol, and halcion down my throat when i was 10 years old... (yeah.. i got started early) I was depressed and scared to go outside because I thought I would pee myself. Hell, it happened at school on more than one occasion. If my mom tried to get me to stay at anyones house (family or friends) over night i would scream and cry.

on my own i am down to once every month or two having an accident at night.. I have only been that way for the past year. I am almost 27. It took me almost 30 years to outgrow this. Please, dont let any child go through this. please. Get them help.

I wanted to say that because I think it deffinatley interfered with my social-skills and also going through that all those years added to my depression and degraded my self-image even futher. (i was also very obese and often hid myself in closets and empty rooms for hours because i was scared of everyone..) I went through all my teenage and early adult years (i had reached an ideal weight when i was 19) scared to sleep in the same bed with anyone..for fear of how embarrased and disgusted i would feel if ihad an accident. at 18-21 you should be enjoying life and partying..not worried about having to go home all the time for fear you would wet if you drank too much beer. ugh.



chantel...sorry that you guys had such a bad experience with the medicine. it worked like a miracle for me. why did you not try the tablets? my mom tried everything too. she even tried coming in at like midnight to wake me up to go, or she would set my alarm for 2am or something. but 9 times out of 10 it was already too late. :( I am almost 27 now I used the spray from age 8 or 9 till age 25. good luck.
pz

I tried that nasal medication on my daughter and for some reason, it gave her nightmares! It was horrible. I tried the medication and it was horrible too. That device I am talking about it not expensive and it really works. I wish I could remember the name of it. My daughter stopped wetting the bed in like 2 weeks. She wet the bed until she was 10 years old. I thought nothing could be done until I tried that device.

Chantel


I am thinking it is called wet alarm. My son ten also wets the bed every night. Sometimes through two good night pants. Thinking of trying the pills just for sleep overs but not knowing yet.

Bearboy,

I am so sorry you are still suffering from this. I know my daughter went through a whole lot of embarassment too when she was younger. I can't imagine her still going through it. I am just glad that it has lessened for you some though. I wanted to ask you.....have you tried the pills to make your bladder stronger? I had to use them recently because I couldn't hold my urine like I used too. I wouldn't urinate on myself, but it would come real close. I think it's because I used to hold it too long as a child and now my bladder isn't as strong as it used to be. Everyone....listen to your parents when they tell you this cause it's soooooo true;)

Well, I hope you feel better soon hun and get this under control. And remember, not everyone judges you on how you look on the outside. I had to learn the hard way on this. I used to be very small in school and then had two children and now I am overweight. I still like to look good, but I am not so concerened with how others view me anymore. I think I lived for others. I was always worried what other thought of me. I don't know what happened, but I don't think that way as much anymore. I LIVE life for me and my family now and thank God every day that he sent them to me and that I am alive and even though I have little problems, I thank him that he helps me to deal with them.

If you need to talk, I am here for you hun.

Chantel

Sadie,

Hi:) That may be the name. I am tempted to go to the pharmacy and see what the name of it is, lol. It truly was a life saver for my daughter. It brought her self esteem back up tremendously. I hope you find something that works for your son:) Have a good night.

Chantel