no_longer_sad
04-12-2001, 01:12 PM
I have posted on here before about my 2 1/2 year old son. He has not been assessed yet
but he had a language and speech evaluation and he’s speech is severely delayed. My
husband and I took the initiate and hired a speech therapist to work with him 3 days a
week. He will start the sessions next week but everyday he’s making more and more
attempts at speech. He constantly makes sounds and says the letters out loud and numbers (1 to 10). I’m sure you can count and say the letters of the alphabet and still be autistic, but how about approaching strangers? Twice now at different restaurants, he walked up to people seated, looked directly at them, and babbled. Of course, I was shocked because I thought autistic children don’t do that, or do they?
I asked these people he approached if
he looked just in their direction or made eye contact with them and they said that he looked directly into their faces. Also, I read that autistic children do not understand other people's feelings but my son seems to show that he does understand. For example, he wanted a book his brother wanted and once I gave it to him and not his brother, his brother whined. Once he realized this, he pushed the book towards his brother and gave it to him. Does anyone here think I’m reading too much into these behaviors or are they signals that maybe he’s not autistic? I’ve just finished reading a book called “The Out-of-Sync Child” and I recommend it to any parent who believes that maybe it’s not autism at all but just sensory issues the child is suffering from and who exhibits some autistic characteristics. I would appreciate any thought on this.
Thanx,
Sam
[This message has been edited by no_longer_sad (edited 04-12-2001).]
but he had a language and speech evaluation and he’s speech is severely delayed. My
husband and I took the initiate and hired a speech therapist to work with him 3 days a
week. He will start the sessions next week but everyday he’s making more and more
attempts at speech. He constantly makes sounds and says the letters out loud and numbers (1 to 10). I’m sure you can count and say the letters of the alphabet and still be autistic, but how about approaching strangers? Twice now at different restaurants, he walked up to people seated, looked directly at them, and babbled. Of course, I was shocked because I thought autistic children don’t do that, or do they?
I asked these people he approached if
he looked just in their direction or made eye contact with them and they said that he looked directly into their faces. Also, I read that autistic children do not understand other people's feelings but my son seems to show that he does understand. For example, he wanted a book his brother wanted and once I gave it to him and not his brother, his brother whined. Once he realized this, he pushed the book towards his brother and gave it to him. Does anyone here think I’m reading too much into these behaviors or are they signals that maybe he’s not autistic? I’ve just finished reading a book called “The Out-of-Sync Child” and I recommend it to any parent who believes that maybe it’s not autism at all but just sensory issues the child is suffering from and who exhibits some autistic characteristics. I would appreciate any thought on this.
Thanx,
Sam
[This message has been edited by no_longer_sad (edited 04-12-2001).]
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Tired2ru
04-17-2001, 01:40 AM
First off, I must say that there is nothing that an Autistic child can or cannot do just because they are autistic. Many autistic people have great eye contact, great verbal skills, lots of emotion, very social ect ect. What is not likely, is that they have all of the above. Some start one way and end up another. Watch Temple Grandin, still very much autistic, yet she has now great eye contact and lots of emotion. Like I said, one thing they do great does not keep them from being autistic. Weather your child is or not I cannot say. Yes, the "Out of sync child" is a great book and many people who have autism and who might have been wrongfully diagnosed with autism ... have sensery disfunction. Each of these kids are so incredably different. You should have your son evaluated by a team of specialists and then you might know better if he possibly has Autism or not. That should be one of your first steps. There are so many things that it could be or not be.
Sandy
Sandy
whatstheodds
04-17-2001, 05:35 PM
hi sam,
two of my kids have good eye contact,
one of mine will talk to anyone, she has no sense of stranger danger and wouldn't realize
if someone didn't want to talk to her, she doesn't read social cues, if elliot hears someone cry he will go right up to them look them right in the eyes and say stop, he will then cry himself, these kids may all have the same label but they are all so different.
i hope the speech therapy goes well for your little one, keep us posted. take care,
jo.
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two of my kids have good eye contact,
one of mine will talk to anyone, she has no sense of stranger danger and wouldn't realize
if someone didn't want to talk to her, she doesn't read social cues, if elliot hears someone cry he will go right up to them look them right in the eyes and say stop, he will then cry himself, these kids may all have the same label but they are all so different.
i hope the speech therapy goes well for your little one, keep us posted. take care,
jo.
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no_longer_sad
04-17-2001, 08:42 PM
Thank you both for your responses. I’m sure you’re right and I will not know for sure
until he’s assessed, but it’s the waiting that has got me so worked up. Again, I know that you’re both right in saying that no two autistic children are the same but the feedback I have gotten thus far has put me in this state of confusion. Not wanting to just wait I have had him looked at by many professionals privately, not through the health care system, and they feel he is not autistic per se, but does have some tendencies. What does this mean?
Are these tendencies ones that he will outgrow or get worse with age? I’m not getting enough clear answers and hence, I don’t know which road to take next. I have in fact been told by one professional that my son could be a gifted child due to his abilities. How can a gifted child be mistaken for an autistic one? There is obviously so much more to an autistic child than meets the eye. Jo, you say that one of your children will talk to anyone and in that sense, her behavior is similar to my 5 year old (non-autistic) who will do the same thing. I often have to tell him that the other party is no longer interested in what he has to say and he will ask me endlessly why that is.
Take care,
Sam
until he’s assessed, but it’s the waiting that has got me so worked up. Again, I know that you’re both right in saying that no two autistic children are the same but the feedback I have gotten thus far has put me in this state of confusion. Not wanting to just wait I have had him looked at by many professionals privately, not through the health care system, and they feel he is not autistic per se, but does have some tendencies. What does this mean?
Are these tendencies ones that he will outgrow or get worse with age? I’m not getting enough clear answers and hence, I don’t know which road to take next. I have in fact been told by one professional that my son could be a gifted child due to his abilities. How can a gifted child be mistaken for an autistic one? There is obviously so much more to an autistic child than meets the eye. Jo, you say that one of your children will talk to anyone and in that sense, her behavior is similar to my 5 year old (non-autistic) who will do the same thing. I often have to tell him that the other party is no longer interested in what he has to say and he will ask me endlessly why that is.
Take care,
Sam
eweejoe
04-18-2001, 12:28 AM
Autism ranges from mild to profound. Your son may be mildly autistic. I really can't say. My son is profoundly autistic and there's NO doubt about that. The one thing I did want to mention to you is that a lot of research I have done seems to say that repetition and consistency is the key in not only discouraging unappropriate behaviors, but encouraging appropriate ones. There is a therapy known as ABA (applied behavioral analysis) done here in the U.S. that is based strictly on those beliefs. See what you can find out about it. A great textbook/guide to have is "Behavior Intervention for Young Children with Autism" by Catherine Maurice. Sounds like your child would definately benefit from this book to accentuate his positive abilities (emerging speech, etc) and to help discourage his negative (going up to strangers). Take Care! Sherri.
no_longer_sad
04-18-2001, 01:14 PM
Thank you Sherri, I'll get the book. The idea of my son appoaching strangers is really scarring me. Just yesterday, he and his brother were at the playground and when I turned away from A.J.(my 2 and 1/2 year old) he was gone. Let me tell you I was horrified. He was about 40 feet away chasing a dog. The more I ran to him the more he ran towards the dog. I caught him and brought him back and he had no problems picking up where he left off and as a matter of fact, he found a group of three little girls playing in the sand and joined them. The other mothers that were there said that his behaviour is typical for his age. Even though I have an older child, I'm not so sure anymore what is typical and what is out of the norm. Again every child is different, autistic or not, but at what point do we as parents say that our child is behaving differently? He will greet and hug certain strangers who visit our home and completely ignore others. I don't know what to make of that.
Sam
Sam
eweejoe
04-18-2001, 03:16 PM
Hi Sam! The book is awesome. Hope it helps you some. I can't say what is going on with your little guy. I have a 2 1/2 year old little girl and she is not shy for the most part, but knows 'stranger danger'. My son Keith who is 8 and autistic on the other hand, knows no strangers. He is 'infamous' for his hugs at school, doctor's office, etc. I do not think it is hugging for Keith as much as he likes to 'sniff' hair or he likes the feel of people's hair on his face. It is a strange behavior that sometimes really embarasses me. He is NOT at all selective in who he hugs. Even those that I would rather he didn't, if you know what I mean. :) Not all people are receptive to it and I have been trying for a long time now to discourage it and not allow him to do it since it is not appropriate. I worry a lot too about Keith wondering off. He will stay in his yard at home, but if he's at the park or somewhere, he has no boundaries. I wouldn't necessarily think your little boy chasing a puppy is autistic behavior, but other things you've said may be. My son was only recently diagnosed as autistic after years and years of my telling everyone I thought he was and no one listening to me. He has another primary diagnosis, so his autism is secondary to it, but none the less he is autistic and could have greatly benefited from ABA therapy LONG ago. I don't think Keith's autism is related to immunizations or anything else since he doesn't have any health problems, bowel problems, immune problems, etc. If your son is eventually diagnosed with autism then I would get him into ABA therapy ASAP. The sooner they start the more likely they are to function as normal children and adults later. There is always light at the end of the tunnel. Good Luck to you and your little guy. I hope things go well for you both!
no_longer_sad
04-18-2001, 05:39 PM
I know exactly what you mean about who your child is touching. Can you elaborate on why our children like to touch others. I read somewhere that it's a sensory issue of some sort but I've forgotten. My son likes to touch others and if he's close to their hair, he'll grab for it. He won't pull at it but just touch. Help me out here. Why is he doing this and what can I do to give him what he needs without having him touch others?
I just wanted to add that I was in no way suggesting that chasing a puppy was a strange behaviour. But for him to run so far and have me out of his sight, and not worry about that. My other child would have a fit if I wasn't in his sight at all times. I watched A.J. before where he appeared to be looking for me and once he could not find me to open a door for him, he went to the next available person (a complete stranger at a music progam for children) and pulled them to the door.It is obvious that he needs to be watched so much more closely than the average child his age. But yet, there are times where he will only come to me and no one else exists. It is these behaviours that confuse and worry me.
[This message has been edited by no_longer_sad (edited 04-18-2001).]
I just wanted to add that I was in no way suggesting that chasing a puppy was a strange behaviour. But for him to run so far and have me out of his sight, and not worry about that. My other child would have a fit if I wasn't in his sight at all times. I watched A.J. before where he appeared to be looking for me and once he could not find me to open a door for him, he went to the next available person (a complete stranger at a music progam for children) and pulled them to the door.It is obvious that he needs to be watched so much more closely than the average child his age. But yet, there are times where he will only come to me and no one else exists. It is these behaviours that confuse and worry me.
[This message has been edited by no_longer_sad (edited 04-18-2001).]
eweejoe
04-18-2001, 11:55 PM
Hi! As for the hair thing, I do believe it is the sensation of it in their face that they like. The only advice I can give you there is to discourage him from doing it. I just look at Keith in the eyes and say "NO" and place his hands down beside his body. I will allow him to 'hug' me once, then I start the "no". The only harm in it, I feel, is that it is not appropriate behavior. It is a form of self-stimulation and the more you can discourage any form of that (spinning toys, flapping paper, flapping hands) the better for him. It draws them into their own little world to do these things. If they are forced not to do them, they have no choice but to deal with their surroundings. Make sense?
Sadly enough, your son will probably have to be kept under your wing until he has therapy and learns appropriate social behaviors and is not so 'trusting' of strangers. Like I said before, he is young. If he is autistic, he is at the best age possible for therapy to start and him to benefit from it greatly. If he is saying words and numbers then he is already doing better than most. My son is almost 9 and has never spoken a word. I don't know if you've read the other parent's posts on this board about the GF/CF diets, viatmins, etc. Does your son have bowel/digestive problems? If so, you may want to read their posts. My son has autism for a totally different reason than theirs do and I don't feel he would benefit from the diet, but your son might. You can also read about it at www.feat.com. (http://www.feat.com.) Good Luck to you and your little ones!! Take care!! Sherri.
Sadly enough, your son will probably have to be kept under your wing until he has therapy and learns appropriate social behaviors and is not so 'trusting' of strangers. Like I said before, he is young. If he is autistic, he is at the best age possible for therapy to start and him to benefit from it greatly. If he is saying words and numbers then he is already doing better than most. My son is almost 9 and has never spoken a word. I don't know if you've read the other parent's posts on this board about the GF/CF diets, viatmins, etc. Does your son have bowel/digestive problems? If so, you may want to read their posts. My son has autism for a totally different reason than theirs do and I don't feel he would benefit from the diet, but your son might. You can also read about it at www.feat.com. (http://www.feat.com.) Good Luck to you and your little ones!! Take care!! Sherri.
no_longer_sad
04-19-2001, 12:35 AM
Hi Sherri,
Yes, your advise make a great deal of sense. I have actually tried the diet you mentioned and it was not applicable to A.J. In fact, he has never had any type of bowl or digestive problems, but to be honest, I'm not sure what that is exactly. He has frequent movements, once a day on average and sometimes twice. The only thing that I have noticed is that at times his bowel movements are a little pebbly. Is that considered a problem? I'm not sure. I have also tried vitamins and have now decided to stop again to see if there any difference, and I don't notice anything at all. I have to ask you another question, and in all fairness, I do realize that children are different. But can an autistic child sit through two periods of a very, very loud hockey game and be alright with it? I had mentioned this to a woman who worked with autistic children for a number of years and she told me an autistic child would have been very uncomfortable with that degree of noise and would have made it known. Last night, we took our boys to a play off game and my eldest one tired out before A.J. As a matter of fact, once A.J. finished absorbing the sights he got into it. When the crowd cheered, he would jump and wave his arms over his head. We kept watching him to make sure that we would take him out of there at the slightest inclination that he was not enjoying it but he was. But it was there that he began to touch the woman's hair sitting directly in front of him. She was nice and didn't mind this, but after a couple of times I told him No, pulled his hand away, and he stopped. I feel as though I'm asking you dx my son, and I'm sorry about that. But I'm trying to understand. Like you said before, he may be mildly autistic and I can see that being the case with him.
Thanx again for your responses.
Sam
Yes, your advise make a great deal of sense. I have actually tried the diet you mentioned and it was not applicable to A.J. In fact, he has never had any type of bowl or digestive problems, but to be honest, I'm not sure what that is exactly. He has frequent movements, once a day on average and sometimes twice. The only thing that I have noticed is that at times his bowel movements are a little pebbly. Is that considered a problem? I'm not sure. I have also tried vitamins and have now decided to stop again to see if there any difference, and I don't notice anything at all. I have to ask you another question, and in all fairness, I do realize that children are different. But can an autistic child sit through two periods of a very, very loud hockey game and be alright with it? I had mentioned this to a woman who worked with autistic children for a number of years and she told me an autistic child would have been very uncomfortable with that degree of noise and would have made it known. Last night, we took our boys to a play off game and my eldest one tired out before A.J. As a matter of fact, once A.J. finished absorbing the sights he got into it. When the crowd cheered, he would jump and wave his arms over his head. We kept watching him to make sure that we would take him out of there at the slightest inclination that he was not enjoying it but he was. But it was there that he began to touch the woman's hair sitting directly in front of him. She was nice and didn't mind this, but after a couple of times I told him No, pulled his hand away, and he stopped. I feel as though I'm asking you dx my son, and I'm sorry about that. But I'm trying to understand. Like you said before, he may be mildly autistic and I can see that being the case with him.
Thanx again for your responses.
Sam
eweejoe
04-19-2001, 01:09 AM
Sounds like he's quite possibly mildly autistic. Keith has been diagnosed as autistic recently. He has no problem with noises. The thing about autism is that not every child flaps their hands. Not every child has severely sensitive senses. Keith is not sensitive to light, sound, or smell. But he is sensitive to touch/texture. ASD can range from one end of the gammet to the other. I truly don't know what to think about your son. The only thing that makes me feel like he might be mildy autistic is his delayed speech. If you told him to leave the ladies hair alone, and he did, that's a great sign. Keith will not stop until I remove him from the situation or distract him with something else. I used to take him to basketball games that were loud and he didn't mind them at all. So see, there may be things about your son that make you think "Hmmm, that's not autistic behavior" but it could just be that he has a very mild case. The only thing you've really said that makes me think that, is like I said, his speech delays. That is a classic sign. Get him diagnosed, and get the necessary treatment in line for him. Once again, not meaning to sound like a broken record, if he's autistic get ABA therapy for him. It works remarkably well if they start on it before age 5. As for the bowel problems I asked about, seems to me like the majority of parents complain about either chronic diahrrea or constipation one of the two. If your little guy is going daily, he's probably fine. Hope this has helped. Take Care!!
Sherri.
Sherri.