HI, my child is 9 and goes to a small school where everyone is kind and understanding of his C.P. maybe a little too much! ;) He is the only kid there with a physcial disability. It mainly affects his legs and balence but he can walk independtly. The other kids always want to help him out, [which is great! :) ] sometimes he lets them and other times he tells them no thanks. The problem is that when they play kick-ball at school, the other kids never want to count him out no matter what he does [they're trying to be nice to him and they don't want to lose].
He comes home so upset b/c of this. I asked him if they counted him out and his team lost, would he feel the same? and he said yes b/c at least they counted what he did good or bad. My son can do pretty much anything the others can just s l o w e r . I talked to the teacher and she said she could say somthing to the kids, but as a mom, I don't want the other kids mad at him for losing the game. I also don't want his self-esteem to take a nose dive. :confused: Any kind of input anyone has would be greatly appreciated! :wave:

I just showed your question to my son, who recently turned ten and also has mild CP that affects his left side. He has worn a brace since he was two.

He wants to answer. What follows is his response:

This is what I would do if I were in that situation: I don't think it would hurt his feelings if the kids were to count it as an out and that the your son should talk to the kids first and if that does not work the teacher should talk to them.

what I would do if I were in that situation: I don't think it would hurt his feelings if the kids were to count it as an out and that the your son should talk to the kids first and if that does not work the teacher should talk to them.
My son says that your answer to my problem is good. He agreed that it wouldn't hurt his feelings if they counted him out as long as it counts. we'll probably talk to the teacher if that's what it takes. Thank-you sooo much for answering! :bouncing:

You're welcome :)

I have mild CP and when i was in school and it was raining outside and we were supposed to play a sport in gym class we would do it inside and every time i would run as fast as i could to get to the base ( i remember playing softball) and the kids would make a point to throw it to first base really fast. I never got on any bases. but i always tried it didnt seem bad at the time but looking back i think i wasnt looking at how those kids really looked at me and that that i was different. It didnt really start to bug me until high school. i wanted to be "normal" and i never could be what i didnt realize though is that nobody is normal nobody can be perfect have a perfect like etc. It just cant happen, have faith that your son is doing the best he can and making a couple of friends if not more.

I'm 18 with the same type of cp your son has (basically) and I completely understand what he means. It hasn't happened during kickball, but other games. In elementary school, I've had a well-intentioned friend say "That's okay, you don't have to be out, your legs are different." (Something like that) Anyway, I said, "No don't worry, my legs don't affect the game." I would say exactly what Zagerus' son said. Also, in high school, I had more trouble kicking the ball than in past years, so someone kicked for me, and I ran. It seems like your son's peers are as supportive as mine were, so it shouldn't be a problem if he wants to do that. The more active he is, the less they will take pity on him (as you probably know). :bouncing: :)

What exactly is MILD CP? Can anyone tell me! I absolutely hate MILD describing any disability. You people that use the term, just wait until you are middle-aged and try to use the term MILD then...

KIDSAREGREAT!,

Your child needs to tell the other children that he gets upset when they treat him differently in physical activities. If he fails to complete something or gets "counted out" he needs to show others that he can laugh about it, and that it is no big deal... It might just be that he can't laugh about being counted out, and the kids have seen this

Musicmaker,

I understand completely what you mean which is why I refrain from using that term. Well, I don't understand COMPLETELY what you mean, because I am not middle-aged yet, but I've heard about what's coming.
I honestly don't think that when people use the term "mild" they are trying to brush off someone's disability in anyway. I think they just mean what I've seen you post "easy" cp compared to the severity of other's diagnosis.
I also know that you did not direct your post to me personally, so I am not defending myself, merely offering an explanation that I can think of.

Edited to add that the original poster DID put the term in quotes, so maybe she does not personally feel that it is mild either.

That's ok nutcase16,
it's just when these Cerebral Palsy threads start getting filled with the word "mild", I get irritated with the thought that anyone thinks of CP as a "mild" thing at all. It is true that some of us are fortunate to have been able to get around a little better or speak a little better or have a little less pain. Let one AB deal with a "mild" case of CP and see if the CP is mild to them. I don't think MILD will be in their CP vocabulary for long. I use the word to describe how hot a hot sauce is, or how a winter was, or how the weather is...

Yeah, I wonder where the phrase "mild cp" started anyway. Probably doctors who don't specialize in neurology..........
Anyway, carry on with the topic of this thread. :)

Musicmaker,
I don't think it's fair of you to assume that someone using the term "mild" with CP is trivializing the condition, and I certainly don't think that parents of children with CP are trivializing it or diminishing its gravity. But they are trying to indicate that their children are able to walk or run perhaps with the aid of braces and that their fine motor skills are sufficient to allow them to write and manipulate objects successfully independently. It is not at all unusual for medical conditions to be described as ranging from mild to severe. Mild means moderate -- it is used to describe many things besides seasons and sauces.
I take your point, but I think you misconstrue what the poster meant to say. And, by the way, "mild CP" is precisely the way my son's pediatric neurologist described his condition in an effort to explain how severely his gross and fine motor skills were affected by the condition.
Nevertheless, I appreciate your comments and have learned from them.

Hello Zagreus,
in this thread, KIDSAREGREAT! did the right thing putting "" around mild. The thing I have against using "mild" for anything like mild stroke, or mild heart attack is just that all these things are really not mild at all. If you had a heart attack or a stroke, would you consider them to be mild at all? I really don't think so... I was born with CP 54 years ago. I've had a great life. I am married to a wonderful woman. I held a good job for over 35 years. I have no speech difficulties and I can drive, swim, walk and Parasail... Does this make my CP mild? Heck no! I've spent over 2 years of my life in a hospital. I've experienced the pain and long recovery times of 11 muscle transplants in my legs over a period in my life from 5 to 34. I have seen children die of heart, kidney and lung problems. I have known children that couldn't do anything for themselves. No hearing, no sight, no movement and no speech... "Mild" just doesn't belong in the same sentance with CP, period...

Ok, because the debate over "mild" has intrigued me so much, I went so far as to look it up in the dictionary:

mild (mild)
adj. mild·er, mild·est
1. Gentle or kind in disposition, manners, or behavior.
2.

a. Moderate in type, degree, effect, or force: a mild pipe tobacco; a mild sedative.
b. Not extreme: a mild winter storm.
c. Warm and full of sunshine; pleasant: a mild spring day; mild weather in June.
3. Not severe or acute: a mild fever.
4. Easily molded, shaped, or worked; malleable: mild steel.

*AHEM* In conclusion, I think we can agree that there are many definitions of the word, and although one definition does not explain a diagnosis of cp PRECISELY, the one that most fits is 2a. As people affected by cp in one way or another, I also think that we can agree the term "mild" is merely used to compare the different abilities within the wide range of cp diagnoses, not how it individually affects one's life.
*Standing on a soapbox was fun!* :D

I understand entirely what you mean, but I also know that my son is much more than his CP. He too has had surgery. I myself have had some surgeries in my life, as a child and as an adult -- but not for CP.
But I think it's all right to put those terms together in the right context. And, yes, I think there is a range of symptoms for all of those conditions. They are serious conditions, but there has to be a way of characterizing a wide range of symptoms. Otherwise we can take any condition and make it an absolute. Learning Disabilities, vision impairments, diabetes, heart conditions. I hope my son learns to think of his disability as mild, because in his case with effort and focus he can overcome most of the obstacles it presents. There's so much hope for him.
I have no quarrel with your insights, but I do think many people who speak of mild CP do so with full compassion, love, and support for the people they love. I myself wouldn't criticize them for using the term. But I speak only for myself.

Well-said, Zagerus.

I too have characterized my diagnosis as mild because well, I am so much more than a person with cp. I never think about it, and when I do, it's only on these boards to get support. I think most of the time my friends and family forget I have cp all together. That is the reason why my diagnosis is referred to as "mild". Just because a diagnosis is "mild" does not mean it does not change a person's life in everyway. It does. BUT since there are a wide range of diagnoses of cp, I think it is fine to use it in the right context.
LOL basically what you JUST said, Zagerus.

So if you have a "mild" case of CP just what are you referring to? A little speech trouble, no speech trouble... A little balance trouble, no balance trouble... A limp, no limp... a slight limp... Use a wheelchair, don't use a wheelchair, or walker. If you use the word MILD to describe your CP, I might just know someone who could actually show that you have a more severe case than they have, so therefore you have a severe case of CP, compared to someone else...

I understand what you mean, I really do. But someone could have a less severe case of cp than me, and mine could still be considered "mild". I didn't say "mildest". I personally have never come across anyone with "less severe" cp than me however. Anyway, yes, the "mild" cp changes my life, but so does everyone else's cp.

*BTW* I hope that you are not getting TOO irritated by this debate, because I like to argue (in a friendly way). My legal ed. teacher told me it's fun if you can argue for both sides, and I can do that. :)

Edited to add:

At this stage in my life, being 18, I do agree with the doctors that my cp is "mild", HOWEVER I may change my mind as I get older of course. But right now, it is not a HUGE obstacle in my life....this may be why we disagree. You're older and your "mild" cp affects you more. I can only speak for myself. :)