I have lived in this eating disordered NIGHTMARE for 23 years now. I'm 35, so most of my life. A very sad thing. What's sadder is that I can't seem to snap out of this "sick thinking". Everyday, the same thing...IF I eat, or WHAT I eat, does not stay down. And then, like tonight, I go through the whole, "is this going to be it", feeling. (Any of you who have gone through seizures know what I mean) It's a feeling like your body is just not going to go on anymore. Very dizzy, cold sweaty, and really numb. What am I waiting for? Why do I, (we) continue to play this tightrope game with our health and sanity? I do not want to die. Although, I did at one time. I wish so much all this would go away. Is this gonna be it?? No, not this time. Now for tomorrow.

I don't have any advice or help to give, because I've only been struggling with an eating disorder for about a month and a half. But I can let you know that I will pray for you, and be thinking of you. God can help you get through this time, he can do anything. Good luck, we support you!

~Ana

Thank you for your kind thoughts, Ana.

Gena