I get cold sores every now and then. Maybe a couple times a year. I know not to perform oral sex when I have one, but what about when I don't? Plus, I read that something like 80% of the population is infected. So is it really safe for any of us to be giving/receiving oral sex out there? I know there's viral shedding and all, but really, what are the chances that it will spread when there are no symtoms? Please offer your opinions. I really don't know what to do and I'm scaring myself. Should I stop performing oral sex even when I don't have a cold sore? What do you all think? I really don't want to give my boyfriend genital herpes. Thank you so much.

I get cold sores every now and then. Maybe a couple times a year. I know not to perform oral sex when I have one, but what about when I don't? Plus, I read that something like 80% of the population is infected. So is it really safe for any of us to be giving/receiving oral sex out there? I know there's viral shedding and all, but really, what are the chances that it will spread when there are no symtoms? Please offer your opinions. I really don't know what to do and I'm scaring myself. Should I stop performing oral sex even when I don't have a cold sore? What do you all think? I really don't want to give my boyfriend genital herpes. Thank you so much.

Reina,

i have had oral type 1 for over 20 years. I have never given anything to any of my partners or former husband. I don't preform oral when I have a coldsore. But my current husband will still kiss me on the other side of my mouth.He has never gotten a colsore. :) I am not a big fan of the shedding thing. I am not saying it is not possible but I don't think as often as people think. Just my opinion, but if I were you, I wouldn't give up the oral sex, just be careful! :)

Have your partner wash afterwards with soap if you're really worried. I also think the shedding thing is exaggerated. If they can't even pick it up on a culture, how likely is it someone will get infected? Not saying it doesn't happen, but I think it's more likely that people have slight symptoms and ignore them, like tingling or fatigue.

As for safe--what world do you expect to live in, honey? Is it safe to get in your car? Do you do it? Is it safe to take a bath? Take a walk? Have a baby? Go on a date with someone you've only met a couple times? Backpack? Play football? etc etc etc....I would not give up any of these things (well, ok, I don't really play football...) because there are risks. I will minimize the risks and have a life of quality. I certainly will not give up oral sex!!!! (Well, I wouldn't nag my soulmate about it if he was worried about catching it, but he doesn't want to stop it either!)

Thanks guys. I really appreciate your replies. You both just relieved me of a lot of worry and anxiety. Thanks.