this feelign is awful. i'm going out this weekend, so this week i have literally starved myself. in the past three days, all i've eaten is 2 grahm crackers and a couple of 5 calorie popsicles. i got up this mornign adn was so weak i could barely stand. so i ate anohter grahm cracker adn now i feel fat. i've lost 8 pounds since monday. i hate feeling like this. i'm like counting downt he hours until friday (i'm goign out on thursday) when i can eat normally for 3 days, until monday comes and then i have to stop eating again beucase i'm goign to my bfs cabin adn will hvae to wear a swimsuit. i'm so lost right now i do'nt even know what to do anymore. i'm been onagain/offagain anorexic for 3 years now and i HATE it! i'm not happy when i am skinny, not happy when i'm fat. i just wish i coul deat normal. either i eat a ton, or don't eat anything. it's so frustrating.......
peace
cloudnine

Hun, I know this sounds hard, but you need to be eating more than you are. If you starve yourself before eating "normal" this weekend, your metabolism is going to slow down, and you won't be able to eat normal by this weekend. So try and eat a bit more now, and maybe exercise if you feel like you need to. This will be better for your body than starving then eating more than it's used to. I do this too, but I starve myself after I eat "normal" one day. It's just as bad, so I'm gonna try and stop too. Good luck and God Bless!

~Ana

I really think that you need to talk to someone. First of all, losing 8 pounds in less than 2 weeks is VERY VERY VERY unhealthy and dangerous. Your body cannot adapt that quickly. You could permenantly ruin you body/organs and their functions.

Please talk to a doctor, teacher, parent, friend, etc- ANYONE that can help you. i know this is almost pointless to say, but you really really really need to eat more too. If you can't even stand how do you suppose youre going to do anything at all this weekend, or at your bf's cabin. Nobody will like being with you because you'll be way too weak to do anything and you wont eat, which many many many people do as a social thing (ie/ picnics on the beach). Try to find help ASAP!!!!!! You need to talk to someone, let them help you do the right thing(s).

Im betting anything that you are not fat- not even close (probably underweight even). More importantly, an extra cracker will NOT make a difference. That is to say it is physically impossible for you to gain weight from one extra cracker ESPECIALLY if you're having under your basal metabolic rate in calories. You should, at minimum be having 1200!!!!!!! I know it is a lost cause to say that, but it is very very worrysome if that is all youve had for 3 days. VERY worrysome. PLease talk to someone!!!!

P.S. Youre bf won't want to be with you if youre focused on food and very insecure- no one will. Not only that, he wouldnt have been attracted to you if you didnt already have a great personality, and let's face it, great looks (what guy do you know ignores looks completely?)

thank you both for your responses...i know i need help, and i know i need to eat. i had a sandwich today and some more crackers, so that'sa lil better, but now i just feel like a fat hog. so i went to the gym adn ran for like 15 minutes...UGH this is so frustrating!

Yeah thats a LITTLE better, but really you should be eating way more and not excersising ya know!! I can see you're trying..but again, a sandwich and crackers (unless you had 400 000 servings of both) will NOT make you gain weight. And i know you didnt have 400 000 servings!

I've been where you are and worse. I've been anorexic for the past 8 years and have just recently got the point where I can control it. There was a point about 5 years ago when I was 15 that I weighed 90 lbs and was so weak I couldn't even hold my head up or anything, much less walk or stand up. I've learned that eating in moderation is ok, and if you eat small meals frequently through the day you won't gain weight, you'll actually lose it! If you ever need someone to talk to please let me know, I've been there so I know what you're going through....

thanks so much for your response...it made me feel better...i love to eat adn i hate it at teh same time. i'm more happy when i'm not "full"...i love the feeling of being hungry, but i hate being weak at the same time. i got drunk last thursday, and got super sick becuase one---hadn't eaten hardly anything all weak, and 2, probably didn't drink enough water either...it's so frustrating. i'm really not that skinny--i'm not big, but i'm not "anorexic" looking, or w/e u call it. i don't know...how did you get through it, or are you still trying to recover? please tell me your stories!!!
thanks, and peace
cloudnine