feelbad
08-11-2004, 10:16 AM
I have been searching for an answer to this question and cannot seem to find it.If someone here could help me with this, i surely would be very appreciative.
First just let me give you a bit of background.My husband of twenty four years decided to be selfish and stupid and he ended up having an affair with another women.This was the first and only time he has ever cheated on me.This i know to be true because of the way he is and the way this whole thing happened.But anyway,I made him go in and have std testing as i found out these two geniuses had not used a condom.Unbelievable but true non the less.well, all of his tests came up neg for any stds.Which was a huge relief.I did not get any testing as when his tests came up neg I felt that everything was okay.I know that i probably should have but I didn't want this included in my med records if i could possibly avoid it.Now for the problem/question.i have been noticing little things?that look like they could be warts on the outside and one just inside of the vagina area.But when i have looked at my husbands penis, I don't see anything like this.what i am wondering is if I could have gotten the warts from this other woman but it didn't show in my husband?i know that there are certain stds that show up between women but not men,at least that is what I have heard.Is this a possibility to happen?any info you could provide for me would sure be a great help as i need to talk to my husband about this but I need to know if this is even possible to happen.By the way, in all of my life, my husband has been my one and only sexual partner.At least one of us knows how to keep our pants on when away from home.Thanks,Marcia
First just let me give you a bit of background.My husband of twenty four years decided to be selfish and stupid and he ended up having an affair with another women.This was the first and only time he has ever cheated on me.This i know to be true because of the way he is and the way this whole thing happened.But anyway,I made him go in and have std testing as i found out these two geniuses had not used a condom.Unbelievable but true non the less.well, all of his tests came up neg for any stds.Which was a huge relief.I did not get any testing as when his tests came up neg I felt that everything was okay.I know that i probably should have but I didn't want this included in my med records if i could possibly avoid it.Now for the problem/question.i have been noticing little things?that look like they could be warts on the outside and one just inside of the vagina area.But when i have looked at my husbands penis, I don't see anything like this.what i am wondering is if I could have gotten the warts from this other woman but it didn't show in my husband?i know that there are certain stds that show up between women but not men,at least that is what I have heard.Is this a possibility to happen?any info you could provide for me would sure be a great help as i need to talk to my husband about this but I need to know if this is even possible to happen.By the way, in all of my life, my husband has been my one and only sexual partner.At least one of us knows how to keep our pants on when away from home.Thanks,Marcia
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luv4adonai
08-11-2004, 12:47 PM
first off, i'm very sorry to hear that your husband had to be so selfish...it doesn't seem very possible for people to stay committed to just one person anymore these days :(
to answer your question, yes, it is possible that he has passed genital warts on to you. warts kind of have a mind of their own...a person can be carrying a strand (there are about 60 or 70 different types of strands) and not even know it because they won't get any warts...they kinda just show up whenever they want to. the thing that sucks about testing for hpv on men is that if the man doesn't have any visible signs of warts, then there is no other way to find out if he has hpv. because it is a virus that hides out in skin cells, not blood, doctors cannot do a dna test on a man, and because there are no pap smear-like tests for men, there is no way to test the skin cells inside of a male penis. so, it is definetly possible that your husband is carrying a strand of warts, passed it onto you, and not even know it because they aren't showing up on him (right now).
if i were you, i would get a pap smear done and find out for sure...it's also very possible that those aren't warts (what else they might be, i don't know because i don't know what they look like)...it's possible they may be nothing at all. just get checked out by a doctor as soon as you can to be sure. good luck.
to answer your question, yes, it is possible that he has passed genital warts on to you. warts kind of have a mind of their own...a person can be carrying a strand (there are about 60 or 70 different types of strands) and not even know it because they won't get any warts...they kinda just show up whenever they want to. the thing that sucks about testing for hpv on men is that if the man doesn't have any visible signs of warts, then there is no other way to find out if he has hpv. because it is a virus that hides out in skin cells, not blood, doctors cannot do a dna test on a man, and because there are no pap smear-like tests for men, there is no way to test the skin cells inside of a male penis. so, it is definetly possible that your husband is carrying a strand of warts, passed it onto you, and not even know it because they aren't showing up on him (right now).
if i were you, i would get a pap smear done and find out for sure...it's also very possible that those aren't warts (what else they might be, i don't know because i don't know what they look like)...it's possible they may be nothing at all. just get checked out by a doctor as soon as you can to be sure. good luck.
reni
08-11-2004, 02:14 PM
I agree with everything the above poster said. Your husband couldn't have been tested for HPV unless he had visible warts showing. And most people who have HPV don't have any signs... that's why it is passed from person to person so easily. So yup, he could have infected you with genital warts.
KimRick
08-11-2004, 05:50 PM
Unfortunately, there are NO tests available for men and without a visible wart, diagnosis is IMPOSSIBLE!!! If I were you, I would get tested for all std's and get a pap smear for the HPV. No one but you & you're doctor is going to look at your medical records anyway. You're not the first person to ever be tested for std's.
Magnetic
08-11-2004, 09:00 PM
Not to make things more complicated, but HPV - if this is what you have - can take years to show up. Either of you might have picked this up before marriage and are only now finding out. With HPV, placing blame, unless possibly one or both of the partners were virgins and had sex only with the other, is impossible.
j.rutledge
08-11-2004, 10:32 PM
I just want to say i recieved genital warts from my ex wife, i didnt show symptoms for 2 years, where as my wife showed symptons a year before i did. It all depends on your immune system. You need to go to a physician ASAP. And I would go get STD testing, respect your body and make your body high priority.
feelbad
08-12-2004, 10:57 AM
Thank you,thank you for responding with so much info,and caring.this has been a rather tough time as you can imagine.after lots of counseling I decided to stay with him,for a whole bunch of different reasons.I actually told him last night as he has been wanting sex for a while and i have been putting him off as I have now discovered these little nodules?just inside the vagina.They do not resemble the bumps that I have on the outside.They are raised up and look like my regular skin not like something that has grown on top of the skin.and the area underneath is rather swollen and painful.I am calling my doc today to get all this checked out and find out just what is going on.i am just hoping that it is nothing serious.The reason i did not want this stuff in my med records is that i am in the process of trying to get on disability as i suffered major nerve damage due to a surgery done on the inside of my spinal cord(yea, i really needed something else to have to deal with!!)and really feel rather embarressed to have them read all of this in my records.I know that I didn't do anything wrong here but I am afraid they will see this like i am running around having sex with all kinds of people while i am claiming to be disabled.It just bothers me that someone will read this.My husband really feels badly about this(and he should) so I at least have a sympathetic ear and a shoulder.He is really seeing all of the far reaching consequences of what he did,and really regrets what he did to me and the emotional mess he dumped on our children.They really lost alot of respect for him.He is slowly earning it back but it is going to take a very long time.
to anyone out there who is contemplating an affair,just let me say this:If you are that unhappy in a marriage that you are having to seek out someone else,please sit down and talk with your SO before you go this route to see if things can be worked out.if they can't then by all means, get the heck out of the relationship before you do this.I cannot even describe the overwhelming pain and complete heartbreak that my husband has caused me and our children.If you think for one minute that you wont be found out at some point,you are mistaken.Someday,somehow,some way,your secret will come to light and you will wish you had never been born.what you might percieve as just having a little fun can cause you and the people you love untold pain and heartache for many years to come.My husband has been through hell and back and trying to live with the horrid guilt.what he did just completely devistated our youngest(was 16 at the time)and caused him some very major depressin.do you want to do this to your kids?
I am sorry i got on a rant there.thanks again for the info,it really has helped.I will let you know what happens.Marcia
to anyone out there who is contemplating an affair,just let me say this:If you are that unhappy in a marriage that you are having to seek out someone else,please sit down and talk with your SO before you go this route to see if things can be worked out.if they can't then by all means, get the heck out of the relationship before you do this.I cannot even describe the overwhelming pain and complete heartbreak that my husband has caused me and our children.If you think for one minute that you wont be found out at some point,you are mistaken.Someday,somehow,some way,your secret will come to light and you will wish you had never been born.what you might percieve as just having a little fun can cause you and the people you love untold pain and heartache for many years to come.My husband has been through hell and back and trying to live with the horrid guilt.what he did just completely devistated our youngest(was 16 at the time)and caused him some very major depressin.do you want to do this to your kids?
I am sorry i got on a rant there.thanks again for the info,it really has helped.I will let you know what happens.Marcia
bontok12
08-13-2004, 03:37 AM
It really dont matter once a person has HPV, he does, you cant rid them, they do no harm for a while.

