I am severly depressed and am drinking to numb the pain. I am not a drinker when I am not depressed but I find that when I have depression the alcohol removes the anxiety and stops me thinking so much, however, when I have one drink I want onther until I am out of it and all I want to do is sleep so I dont have the depression any more. My doc has told me that I am not an alcoholic but I am using the alochol as a support. I really dont want to drink but the depression is so bad that I will do anything to stop the immediate pain without any disregard for the consequenses - terrible consiquenses as i feel worse. I am with my parents at the moment and am putting them through hell with the drinking. they are very concerned and are stressed as they can not trust me with the alcohol. does anyone else have any experience with alcohol and depression. I so dont want to drink but the awful pain that the depression gives me is unbearable - I have posted another thread as I am being started on Remeron in a week and am being taken off Citalopram (Ciprimil). I wish I could be on the new drug now but my doc has put me on the max citalopram dose of 60mg and is concerned about Seretonin Syndrome. I am so desperate to get to next week (which does not sound like long but when feeling this bad it is forever) without drinking. Any comments or peoples previous experience would be appreciated.
D x :(

I hear where you are coming from. It's nothing but a viscous cycle. You feel better as you are drinking, but the problem is after you sleep it off you feel worse and more depressed than if you didn't drink at all. And this is with no hangover. I learned this years ago. I just tell myself, do I want to feel worse tomorrow? I know I will if I drink. The depression is bad enough all by itself. I don't need to make it worse by something I can control. If I keep telling myself that, it will stop me from drinking. Alcohol does make depression worse, there is no doubt about it. I feel for you, I know what you are going through. Just keep telling yourself, I know I'll feel worse later or tomorrow if I drink, and then do your best not to. Try not to think of the immediate feeling, it is so fleeting.

hey, thanks for the message... I would rather stay on meds and not drink than drink... I am finding it impossible not to drink though. it is the severity of the depression... I wake up and know I should not drink for the sake of the illness and the drugs but I am desperate for temporary relief. yes, Im in the UK... I am not pressurised to drink by mates etc... infact I give up alcohol once a year for a month no probs and feel better (in a superior way) than those mates still drinking.. I am using alcohol for a crutch... sometimes I am so depressed that I feel like I can not function and am going mad..... I have been drinking today... quite a few beers... felt fine for about 45 mins but then had to carry on to stop the downer that comes.... I just want to go to sleep now to stop how bad I feel.. I can not describe the terrible feeling I have inside of me... (I am sure my folks will read this as I have told them about it and I am sure it will break theri heart but I find sharing on these boards a help). I wake up with such a terrifying feeling that I feel like I have a pain in my chest. it lasted all day today - well until 2pm (may seem eraly but believe me to get to 2pm is a challenge) and I started on the beers. short of lockingm e up what can I do not to sucumb to the drink... as I say I do not drink but was unfortunate enough at the 3rd to last depression to realise that if I drank around people when depressed I could operate 'normally' for a short period of time. I so want to stop drinking to make my antidepressants work.. but as I said before I am coming offf Citalopram for the next week before they start me on Zispin, would like to keep in touch.

D x

I do know what you are going through as I have been there for many years, and what makes it worse is hiding it from people because they don't understand. To be honest I am completely screwed up, but keep it together for friends and family. I am sitting here now knowing I have to go to work 2morrow and wondering if I will sleep and weather to have a few beers or not. With drink it blows hot and cold, I do not get drunk but as you say releif from the darkness even for a short while is worth it. By the way coming off Citalopram I reduced the tablet by cutting it with a sharp knife until i was just taking dust and then coping alone. is there a trigger to your depression by the way? and how old are you. If there is anyhing I can help you with I will post my e mail address if it is allowed?
Stay tough.
C

i took coke about 7 weeks ago and it tipped me completely over the edge. I so regret doing it... I have tried it a couple of times b4... always felt down for a few days but nothing like how bad I have been for the past weeks. You should take your meds... better than drinking. I would like to keep in touch. im 30 and currently in Swansea but live in London I will change my profiel so you can mail me. Chhers, d

would like to keeo in toiuch, Im 30, live in London but in Wales at the momen with family.

Not sure where I find your e mail address as I clicked on your profile but could not find a link to it? Are we allowed to post our e mail addresses?

Welshboy, I also agree that alcohol is not a good choice for relief of depression and you should make every attempt to stop doing so but you just may want to give a second thought to using antidepressants as a substitute. With the resources of the internet, you can educate yourself on all aspects of the medication you plan to start. This means not just visiting the host site of a specific med but also searching for side effects and other dangers which have been documented. The problems antidepressants can cause after continued use could make you feel worse than those caused by alcohol. Both are powerful substances and have a drastic impact on brain function. In the US anyway, doctors aren't likely to inform the patients of all the serious consequences which can result from these meds. It's more a busine$$ of writing prescription after prescription. Just something to think about before making a decision.

Hi Welshboy

I've been there coke and all and know how bad you feel. Try to hang on in there until your new medication kicks in. Which it will. Try hard to lay off the drink as drink will affect the medication. As soon as you get better which you will, think hard about slowly coming off the medication.

You may find help with groups like AA.

Depression and drink go hand in hand.

Hi Welsh boy

It’s more than a week since you were starting your new medication and were on a deep low.

From your recent posts on other threads you seem to be very much on the mend and looking at life positively.

You seem to be well on the way back to a full and happy life and it’s wonderful to see that you are making such progress

Please keep us up to date.

I don’t want to appear to be a bit of a lecturer but after your reaction to "coke" you would be wise never to play with any drugs again.

The consequences could be very serious for you.

I know... I have learned a tough lesson and wont be playing around with recreational drugs ever again. I am no longer wanting to drink now that the depression has lifted either.
Thanks!

Hi Welsh boy

There is no need for thanks it’s enough to hear that you are so much better and its good news about your depression lifting.

You have made a wise and sensible decision about recreational drugs.

You don’t seem to have a problem with alcohol but it may be wise to stay off it whilst you are on the Zispin.

Enjoy life to the full and keep in touch.

:) :)