mommaoftwinsplus1
02-28-2002, 06:22 PM
does anyone else out there ever feel like they are so ugly? it makes me feel really depressed. i guess i go through this every month when Aunt Flo (period) comes for a visit. its just nice to know i am not alone on this one!!!
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Chanida
03-02-2002, 11:50 PM
I know what you mean.
I have ugly days/moments all the time.
It sucks because on those days you seem to associate everything with it.
Say someone was not nice to you, you think that it's because you're not J-Lo.
Hope you're not feeing that way today!
I have ugly days/moments all the time.
It sucks because on those days you seem to associate everything with it.
Say someone was not nice to you, you think that it's because you're not J-Lo.
Hope you're not feeing that way today!
goth_vamp
05-09-2002, 08:13 PM
i get ugly days too, but it's worse coz i know on a good day i am ugly even though my boyfriend tells me i'm beautiful at least 100 times a week, which just makes me feel worse coz i know he's lying. and scars don't help either, but i cover them up with bands and bangles as best i can and wait for them to fade. I'm so sorry, this was supposed to be a reply to you, but I just ended up talking about myself in my own selfish little way. I'm so sorry.
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Don't dream the dream, be the dream....
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Don't dream the dream, be the dream....
gracieathome
05-09-2002, 08:40 PM
Hey MightyMomma, my niehgbor to the south. Dont sweat it, I think we all go through this every once in a while. Dang hormones!
Gracie
Gracie
Sparkle*Girl
05-11-2002, 04:32 AM
When I am having an ugly day I go to the beautician's for an eyebrow tidy and eyelash tint. It always makes me feel beautiful again http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/t_up.gif
MissValentine
05-11-2002, 08:29 AM
I always feel ugly so now I am very reclusive. I don't like the feeling that I get when I do leave the house and I try to hide away from people from looking at me. Maybe it really is all in my head but it makes me feel awful. It's like I feel so panicked sometimes.
UpTite
05-11-2002, 04:43 PM
Well now Miss V, sounds like you may need a little help from your doctor. Not that it's unusual to feel self conscious or unattractive... I think we all do from time to time! But if it's constant, and panic is involved (my heart goes out to you here, cuz I was in the same boat as you)... I just think that you may need to ask your doctor about social anxiety problems. Maybe (s)he can help you, or refer you to someone that can. I know this is a beauty board, but I just can't resist trying to help someone who is where I was a few years ago.
Zafu
05-11-2002, 06:06 PM
Hi MissV,
Why not pop over to the stress and anxiety board here as well - there's lots of people with similar social anxiety and they're a nice bunch!
Zafu http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/clown.gif
PS Apologies to all for barging in.......
Why not pop over to the stress and anxiety board here as well - there's lots of people with similar social anxiety and they're a nice bunch!
Zafu http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/clown.gif
PS Apologies to all for barging in.......
MissValentine
05-14-2002, 08:14 AM
Hi UpTite and Zafu,
Thanks for the suggestions! I currently don't have a doctor but I will look into what more there is that I can do for the social anxiety.
I have been to the stress and anxiety board, I just feel awkward putting some of my problems down there... I feel most comfortable lurking and reading anyway.
I have a hard time giving eye contact with people and they think that I'm disinterested in conversations but it's as if I find fault in everything about me, whether it be weight, complexion, how my feet look... Maybe I'm a perfectionist when it comes to myself but it causes a lot of anxiety and very low self esteem issues. <--- rambling now...
Thanks for the suggestions! I currently don't have a doctor but I will look into what more there is that I can do for the social anxiety.
I have been to the stress and anxiety board, I just feel awkward putting some of my problems down there... I feel most comfortable lurking and reading anyway.
I have a hard time giving eye contact with people and they think that I'm disinterested in conversations but it's as if I find fault in everything about me, whether it be weight, complexion, how my feet look... Maybe I'm a perfectionist when it comes to myself but it causes a lot of anxiety and very low self esteem issues. <--- rambling now...
STEWARDESSSS
05-14-2002, 05:14 PM
Hi!
Oh yeah, do we get those UGLY days! But I believe it must be hormonal! I mean, when I look at pictures of me a few years back... and in those days I felt I was too fat, not pretty enough, not tall enough, etc. Now I wish I looked just like I did back then! Of course I still get those days every once in a while... But really I think it is linked to the way we feel about ourselves... our body doesn't change that much that we would go from alright to downright ugly@!And of course, others percieve it.They don't notice the changes in our bodies so much, rather it is our "aura" that becomes "ugly" and not attractive.
U don't even know why I started posting in the first place! I don't seem to have a solution/ clue how to mke those days go away.Sorry if I bored you guys... I gguess I just needed to vent! LOL!!!
Oh yeah, do we get those UGLY days! But I believe it must be hormonal! I mean, when I look at pictures of me a few years back... and in those days I felt I was too fat, not pretty enough, not tall enough, etc. Now I wish I looked just like I did back then! Of course I still get those days every once in a while... But really I think it is linked to the way we feel about ourselves... our body doesn't change that much that we would go from alright to downright ugly@!And of course, others percieve it.They don't notice the changes in our bodies so much, rather it is our "aura" that becomes "ugly" and not attractive.
U don't even know why I started posting in the first place! I don't seem to have a solution/ clue how to mke those days go away.Sorry if I bored you guys... I gguess I just needed to vent! LOL!!!
VegasGirl
05-14-2002, 06:55 PM
I always have ugly days right before my period and for the first few days. Of course we do, we gain a few pounds of water weight which causes your tummy to pooch out, and I almost always get a zit. You are not alone!! LOL!
flexfire
05-23-2002, 08:37 AM
It is amazing how horomones can sometimes dictate our self image, thus our frame of mind.
And our pathetic society and all it's false perceptions of beauty and what makes men and women sexy is a great fallacy and a leading down fall of our country...
Follow your dreams;
for as you dream,
so shall you become.
And our pathetic society and all it's false perceptions of beauty and what makes men and women sexy is a great fallacy and a leading down fall of our country...
Follow your dreams;
for as you dream,
so shall you become.
fizzypop
05-27-2002, 03:58 PM
there is a condition called BDD or body dysmorphic disorder that can make suffers think they are so ugly, they won't leave the house. There is help available to over come it.
sdcross37
05-29-2002, 12:46 AM
Okay maybe this might help you alittle. Most everybody I know thinks I"m beautiful, lol, well I'm not. I have to put on make-up, wash and fix my hair everyday, do my nails from time to time, dress up or to what i think is appropriate for the day, and my skin gets really oily sometimes. I look ugly! and my husband says I look most beautiful on those days, thats funny, cuz i know i dont, i look like a sweathog i think. But I think we all look alittle more charming with make-up and the works. I wouldnt base my life around worrying about it. In my own head, my best days are when I'm feeling good and having a good day. Hey we're women, we got alot of work to do everyday and besides I dont see men out doing cosmetic stuff for us everyday. Do it for yourself and remember there's nothing uglier than a person ugly in the inside. Thats where it all starts!
chocolate29
06-08-2002, 12:28 AM
I know what you all are saying, I don't think there is a female out there who doesn't have ugly and fat days sometimes mine get so bad I can cry, but I know that's just my hormones, then somedays I feel like I'm pretty and not fat, I drive myself nuts sometims. On my ugly days when I look in the mirror so much cause I'm trying not to look fat and ugly then the mirror becomes distorted and I start seeing things on myself the wrong way then I really drive myself nuts. So I think I need to try to stay away from the mirror when I have my ugly days. Maybe I just need a man to tell me I'm not ugly. lol... I don't know.
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Sarah
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Sarah
Smoochy
07-16-2002, 03:29 PM
I can have days when I think I am incredibly beautiful and I feel I truly shine very bright on the inside and outside, then the other side is that I have days when I feel so ugly that I have fantasies about being someone else, a whole different person, or have plastic surgery change my appearances, then reset my mind and change my personality. On those days I get very depressed and sometimes I feel like I should kill myself (just a thought, nothing more). I think I have been too isolated lately...
I have covered all the mirrors in the house sometimes, just to forget about the whole thing and be free of all those associations that lead to the same stupid thoughts and feelings of shame. I hate to have the feeling that I don't recognise myself in the mirror.
I think the whole deal is that no matter if people tell you you're beautiful, what you think is beautiful is usually something else. I mean, when I look at myself, I see what I would like to change so I would look more like what I think is beautiful, but other people basically see what is there. I don't know, I am perfectionistic too, and I hate my feet.
I'm getting better though but I still think this is a funny phenomenon. Maybe it's just my hormones?
The problem is that sometimes I really don't like to sit down and put on my make-up, cause I have to look at myself and be reminded of the fact that I'm this limited, fragile mortal and I don't look 'picture perfect' without make up!
Ok I know I need help hehe, I'm working on it.
You know, there is a woman who used her body as a work of art and had a lot of surgeries to make her look really amazing/ unusual (not the Barbie, another woman), she has little horns and stuff, it's amazing.
I can't remember her name....
I think what I'm gonna do is make some glamorous pics of me looking cute, then keep them with me and look at them when I need to be reminded or when I need some kind of 'proof'. LOL I know it is stupid and all of this probably sounds pretty shallow, but if it helps who cares.
I have covered all the mirrors in the house sometimes, just to forget about the whole thing and be free of all those associations that lead to the same stupid thoughts and feelings of shame. I hate to have the feeling that I don't recognise myself in the mirror.
I think the whole deal is that no matter if people tell you you're beautiful, what you think is beautiful is usually something else. I mean, when I look at myself, I see what I would like to change so I would look more like what I think is beautiful, but other people basically see what is there. I don't know, I am perfectionistic too, and I hate my feet.
I'm getting better though but I still think this is a funny phenomenon. Maybe it's just my hormones?
The problem is that sometimes I really don't like to sit down and put on my make-up, cause I have to look at myself and be reminded of the fact that I'm this limited, fragile mortal and I don't look 'picture perfect' without make up!
Ok I know I need help hehe, I'm working on it.
You know, there is a woman who used her body as a work of art and had a lot of surgeries to make her look really amazing/ unusual (not the Barbie, another woman), she has little horns and stuff, it's amazing.
I can't remember her name....
I think what I'm gonna do is make some glamorous pics of me looking cute, then keep them with me and look at them when I need to be reminded or when I need some kind of 'proof'. LOL I know it is stupid and all of this probably sounds pretty shallow, but if it helps who cares.
Smoochy
07-16-2002, 03:43 PM
Orlan is her name
U can do a search on her, she's cool
'Orlan is a French performance artist whose most recent work is herself. Entitled The Reincarnation of Saint Orlan, she has since May 1990 undergone a series of plastic surgical operations to transform herself into a new being, modelled on Venus, Diana, Europa, Psyche and Mona Lisa. She has been featured on CBS's Eye to Eye, written about in Art in America, exhibited worldwide and supported by the French Ministry of Culture and the Ministry of Foreign Affairs.'
[This message has been edited by Smoochy (edited 07-16-2002).]
U can do a search on her, she's cool
'Orlan is a French performance artist whose most recent work is herself. Entitled The Reincarnation of Saint Orlan, she has since May 1990 undergone a series of plastic surgical operations to transform herself into a new being, modelled on Venus, Diana, Europa, Psyche and Mona Lisa. She has been featured on CBS's Eye to Eye, written about in Art in America, exhibited worldwide and supported by the French Ministry of Culture and the Ministry of Foreign Affairs.'
[This message has been edited by Smoochy (edited 07-16-2002).]
Smoochy
07-16-2002, 03:51 PM
'It was while reading a text by Eugénie Lemoine-Luccioni, a Lacanian psychoanalyst, that the idea of going from the text to the act occurred to me (from reading to undertaking the act).
In short, during all my operation-performances I read the following extract from her book La Robe (The dress) which in the résumé says this:
"The skin is deceptive... in life one only has one's skin...there is an error in human relations because one is never what one has... I have an angel's skin, but I am a jackal... a crocodile's skin but I am a puppy, a black skin but I am white, a woman's skin but I am a man; I never have the skin of what I am. There is no exception to the rule because I am never what I have..."
I found that little piece of text on her site..
Basically she went out to the plastic surgery docter and got her skin.
[This message has been edited by Smoochy (edited 07-16-2002).]
In short, during all my operation-performances I read the following extract from her book La Robe (The dress) which in the résumé says this:
"The skin is deceptive... in life one only has one's skin...there is an error in human relations because one is never what one has... I have an angel's skin, but I am a jackal... a crocodile's skin but I am a puppy, a black skin but I am white, a woman's skin but I am a man; I never have the skin of what I am. There is no exception to the rule because I am never what I have..."
I found that little piece of text on her site..
Basically she went out to the plastic surgery docter and got her skin.
[This message has been edited by Smoochy (edited 07-16-2002).]
Mysterywoman
07-17-2002, 08:45 PM
I'm so sorry that everyone feels this way! I, too, suffer from "don't-measure-up itis."
My friends and I all agree that we, too, can look like Heather Locklear or Jennifer Lopez if we hired a trainer to work us out 2 hours a day as well as a hair/make-up artist to be on call whenever we wanted to go to a dinner party.
Everyone is beautiful. I know women who are ordinary looking, but who have become beautiful as I get to know them. These women are working their hearts out to change their corner of the world for the better. As I get to know them, I see their hearts, rather than their external beauty.
I am sure the same could be said of any of you.
My friends and I all agree that we, too, can look like Heather Locklear or Jennifer Lopez if we hired a trainer to work us out 2 hours a day as well as a hair/make-up artist to be on call whenever we wanted to go to a dinner party.
Everyone is beautiful. I know women who are ordinary looking, but who have become beautiful as I get to know them. These women are working their hearts out to change their corner of the world for the better. As I get to know them, I see their hearts, rather than their external beauty.
I am sure the same could be said of any of you.
Smoochy
07-20-2002, 11:35 AM
Of course we could look like that if we would spend all the money. it takes sooo much work and money to look beautiful. (Wine wine :))
I could definately live with having my own personal trainer, stylist and make up artist! Not to mention professional photographers taking pictures of me and always appearing in the right kind of lightning!
Not that it's ever gonna happen.
You're absolutely right though, about the last thing you said. Beauty is about sooooo much more than just what you look like.
I could definately live with having my own personal trainer, stylist and make up artist! Not to mention professional photographers taking pictures of me and always appearing in the right kind of lightning!
Not that it's ever gonna happen.
You're absolutely right though, about the last thing you said. Beauty is about sooooo much more than just what you look like.
Marcelle
07-20-2002, 04:07 PM
I had to add my two cents to that!
I read somewhere that Barbra Streisand calls restaurants in advance to request tables with the best light so she can look a certain way.
Maybe you are on to something when you say that we are all beautiful and don't need to be cookie cutter images of the current beauty icon.
On the other hand, I am going to find out what lights she requests and install them in my house!
I read somewhere that Barbra Streisand calls restaurants in advance to request tables with the best light so she can look a certain way.
Maybe you are on to something when you say that we are all beautiful and don't need to be cookie cutter images of the current beauty icon.
On the other hand, I am going to find out what lights she requests and install them in my house!
Smoochy
07-21-2002, 11:26 AM
LOL
I actually know people who do that and they look amazing, untill you see them out in the sun.
I actually know people who do that and they look amazing, untill you see them out in the sun.