Greetings,
Real brief here as time is of the essence. I have been with my fiance for 2.5 years. Great guy, sweet, romantic and very generous. I hate to use the word "problem" but for a lack of a better word....
He is not the most handy man. Granted, he tries. Right now, as we talk, or should I say, as I type this, he is in the back yard building a deck. He got all the supplies at Home Depot ($1000.00 worth of supplies and more will be spent on finishing touches). He is building a floating deck. It doesnt move :rolleyes: but thats what they call it. If you do a search you would see what I mean.
Any way, with what he has done so far, the cement blocks and some wood, its not even! I can see that by just eye balling it. Its crooked and not level either!! :eek: What do I do? Do I tell him? How? I dont want to hurt him or make him feel inadiquit (major sp). He really trys so hard. :angel:
Hurry! Theres still time to correct it! I just feel bad that he spent the day doing what he has already done.
Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl
P.S. I posted this because I love this man to death and dont want to hurt his feelings.
P.P.S Help!

This is minor and you can tell him about it in a nice way. You can bring a drink out to him and compliment the job that he is doing. Then you can go on to ask him if those blocks are suppose to be like that. If he get defensive then just say you know nothing about building decks and you are sorry for asking.(its like making him feel bad for being an a** if he turns into one.)

Is he the type of guy to flip out if you point out something like that? Of course the sooner you catch it, the better. Better to tell him now than later. I'd say now or forever hold your peace. Ask him is he used a leveler and tell him it looks crooked to you and tell him why. I don't know, I've never been very good at playing the woman games, the stoop to conquer, play dumb and weak to make him feel better games. I'd just tell him flat out that it looks crooked and can he fix it. Let's face it, it's either tell him, pray and hope he figures it out on his own (yeah, right!) or live with an uneven deck.

This is minor and you can tell him about it in a nice way. You can bring a drink out to him and compliment the job that he is doing. Then you can go on to ask him if those blocks are suppose to be like that. If he get defensive then just say you know nothing about building decks and you are sorry for asking.(its like making him feel bad for being an a** if he turns into one.)

See, this is exactly what I'm talking about, and this is what I'm no good at. I guess I never learned what is so wrong with saying "hey, that's uneven!!" I don't get why she should pretend to be stupid and say "oh, dumb stupid me, I don't know anything about decks, duh!!" She doesn't have to be an architect to look at something and tell it's uneven. Who knows, he may be grateful for the second pair of eyes. Offering to do whatever she can to help correct the problem may seem like less criticizing and more "hey it's a team effort, we help each other out" sort of thing.

This is minor and you can tell him about it in a nice way. You can bring a drink out to him and compliment the job that he is doing. Then you can go on to ask him if those blocks are suppose to be like that. If he get defensive then just say you know nothing about building decks and you are sorry for asking.(its like making him feel bad for being an a** if he turns into one.)

It really is minor, I am lucky I dont have the problems that some of the other posters have. I dont mean to sound triat either. Its not my intention.
Funny you say bring him a drink, he just came in and I asked him if I could make him one. Defensive? He doesnt have a defensive bone in his body. Love that man of mine. I just dont want to see him make a expensive mistake.
Your right, I dont know a thing about building anything, but if I see a picture hanging crooked on a wall, that I can spot. Hes in the shower now and I have to go make him a drink...
Thanks and keep posting

Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl

Is he the type of guy to flip out if you point out something like that? Of course the sooner you catch it, the better. Better to tell him now than later. I'd say now or forever hold your peace. Ask him is he used a leveler and tell him it looks crooked to you and tell him why. I don't know, I've never been very good at playing the woman games, the stoop to conquer, play dumb and weak to make him feel better games. I'd just tell him flat out that it looks crooked and can he fix it. Let's face it, it's either tell him, pray and hope he figures it out on his own (yeah, right!) or live with an uneven deck.
Thanks for your reply. This GENTALman could not flip out if he wanted to! I wouldnt be with him if he were that type anyway :nono: . He had a level out there and was using leveling sand (dont ask, I dont know what the stuff is, just saw the empty bags). I dont want to hurt his feelings and was thinking before you posted that I would, as you said, forever hold my peace. I'm just afraid that once I do hold my peace I will be holding it uneven and crooked. :yawn: Am I spelling crooked right? I looks wrong.............
What else?
Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl

Make him a drink, bring it to him out on the deck, set it down and see if he notices the drink isn't level in the glass. If he doesn't spot it, just make a small comment that the glass is crooked :)

See, this is exactly what I'm talking about, and this is what I'm no good at. I guess I never learned what is so wrong with saying "hey, that's uneven!!" I don't get why she should pretend to be stupid and say "oh, dumb stupid me, I don't know anything about decks, duh!!" She doesn't have to be an architect to look at something and tell it's uneven. Who knows, he may be grateful for the second pair of eyes. Offering to do whatever she can to help correct the problem may seem like less criticizing and more "hey it's a team effort, we help each other out" sort of thing.
Obviousley, Im not good at the game playing either. I just dont know what to do. And you may be right about the second pair of eye thing. He has thanked me before for "pointing" something out in the past. :rolleyes:
I like this advise. He's done for the day so I have time to brainstorm with your help.
Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl

For crying out loud lol!!!!! Tell him its crooked!!!!!! He's a big boy, he can handle the truth. (sorry, must stop typing, laughing too hard)

Make him a drink, bring it to him out on the deck, set it down and see if he notices the drink isn't level in the glass. If he doesn't spot it, just make a small comment that the glass is crooked :)
Promisez,
The deck is no where near being done but I sill like your suggestion! :p
I think I am going to make my self a drink and see if I can become uneven and crooked (theres that word again). :bouncing:

Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl

For crying out loud lol!!!!! Tell him its crooked!!!!!! He's a big boy, he can handle the truth. (sorry, must stop typing, laughing too hard)
I guess you would need to know him and our past renovation experiences. Sorry, I know you think this sounds trivial to you but its not to me. I would never want to hurt his feelings. Or worse, make him feel inadiquate.
You dont have to respond any further, I get your drift.

Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl

See, this is exactly what I'm talking about, and this is what I'm no good at. I guess I never learned what is so wrong with saying "hey, that's uneven!!" I don't get why she should pretend to be stupid and say "oh, dumb stupid me, I don't know anything about decks, duh!!" She doesn't have to be an architect to look at something and tell it's uneven. Who knows, he may be grateful for the second pair of eyes. Offering to do whatever she can to help correct the problem may seem like less criticizing and more "hey it's a team effort, we help each other out" sort of thing.


It can be considered a team effort but to a man that is trying to do good and be handy most dont see it that way. I will be honest and will admit that I dont think I would be to understand after busting my butt and someone says "thats not straight". It fair to tell straight out but alot of men wont see it in "Pleasantville Terms" and say "ok hunny, thanks".

I understand where you are coming from but its what I know....

My concern is how hurt he would be when the guests sitting with both of you on the newly completed deck ask him if he got a discount because of the angle of the deck. If they made a comment that the builders had no clue what they were doing, he would be devastated probably. So the question remains, tell him now and take a chance or pray like heck no one ever makes a comment to him later. I think I would tell him now, especially since it's still correctable.

It can be considered a team effort but to a man that is trying to do good and be handy most dont see it that way. I will be honest and will admit that I dont think I would be to understand after busting my butt and someone says "thats not straight". It fair to tell straight out but alot of men wont see it in "Pleasantville Terms" and say "ok hunny, thanks".

I understand where you are coming from but its what I know....

8,
Thanks, thats exactly the way I DONT want to make him feel about busting his bum all day.
Maybe after a drink or so, the deck will look even and level. Going to go eyeball it again before I embibe.

Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl

My concern is how hurt he would be when the guests sitting with both of you on the newly completed deck ask him if he got a discount because of the angle of the deck. If they made a comment that the builders had no clue what they were doing, he would be devastated probably. So the question remains, tell him now and take a chance or pray like heck no one ever makes a comment to him later. I think I would tell him now, especially since it's still correctable.
See the thing is we have been planning to build this for a couple of weeks so all of our friends know he is doing the work so I think they will be more kind with thier remarks if they have any at all. I am going to have a look at it from another angle (the back yard) as I have only seen it through the french doors off the master bedroom. BRB and I will let you know..........................
Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl

Make him a drink, bring it to him out on the deck, set it down and see if he notices the drink isn't level in the glass. If he doesn't spot it, just make a small comment that the glass is crooked :)


LOL...

Water does have a tendency to seek it's own level. :)

Tomsgirl,
Decks normally have a slope away from the house to allow for runoff during rain, but it is usually not detected by eyeballing it. Either that or my eyesight is just bad. :) I think you should bring this issue up to him. Your husband seems like a very nice sensitive man, but I'm sure you can find some way to mention to him that it seems uneven (crooked).

It is better to to let him know right now rather than wait until it is finished. If it hurts his feelings, just give him a big hug and a kiss and let him know you appreciate him for trying so hard to do it correctly.

It can be considered a team effort but to a man that is trying to do good and be handy most dont see it that way. I will be honest and will admit that I dont think I would be to understand after busting my butt and someone says "thats not straight". It fair to tell straight out but alot of men wont see it in "Pleasantville Terms" and say "ok hunny, thanks".

I understand where you are coming from but its what I know....

I can understand that to a degree, I guess. I mean, if I were say, making a big fancy dinner for the family, I wouldn't want someone standing over my shoulder supervising me pointing out every little thing they thought I was doing wrong. BUT...if the recipe called for a cup of sugar and I reach for it and pick up the salt instead and I don't notice, I would hope someone would stop me! I don't know, I just don't get the fragile male ego. I would think the main thing would be to get it right, not to have your feelings stroked.

LOL...

Water does have a tendency to seek it's own level. :)

Tomsgirl,
Decks normally have a slope away from the house to allow for runoff during rain, but it is usually not detected by eyeballing it. Either that or my eyesight is just bad. :) I think you should bring this issue up to him. Your husband seems like a very nice sensitive man, but I'm sure you can find some way to mention to him that it seems uneven (crooked).
Kal,
You are a beauty! Thanks for posting. I will keep you updated as to what I say................
Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl
It is better to to let him know right now rather than wait until it is finished. If it hurts his feelings, just give him a big hug and a kiss and let him know you appreciate him for trying so hard to do it correctly.

I like the hugging part......... And I really do appreciate him.

I can understand that to a degree, I guess. I mean, if I were say, making a big fancy dinner for the family, I wouldn't want someone standing over my shoulder supervising me pointing out every little thing they thought I was doing wrong. BUT...if the recipe called for a cup of sugar and I reach for it and pick up the salt instead and I don't notice, I would hope someone would stop me! I don't know, I just don't get the fragile male ego. I would think the main thing would be to get it right, not to have your feelings stroked.
I am not trying to stroke his feelings, I just dont want to hurt him or make him feel like spending the whole day on it was a waste.
Guess you would have to know more about him...........

See the thing is we have been planning to build this for a couple of weeks so all of our friends know he is doing the work so I think they will be more kind with thier remarks if they have any at all. I am going to have a look at it from another angle (the back yard) as I have only seen it through the french doors off the master bedroom. BRB and I will let you know..........................
Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl


Marilyn,

I am sure your friends will say nice things about the deck. Friends always do just to be nice, but wait until the next day when both of you are not within earshot. They will have a good chuckle to themselves about how crooked the deck is because they also don't want to hurt both your feelings.

Please, find a nice and sensitive way to bring it to his attention if you really think it is going to turn up crooked. Maybe he already knows about it and has a solution in mind or he is just not finished with it and that is why it initially looks crooked.

Just some friendly comments because I don't know anything about building decks.

You asked about telling him and you've used every reason not too :)
Understandably you don't want to hurt his feelings so lets try this. Don't say a word. When it's done, and if by chance someone does mention the angle, just say it had to be done that way to get the water to drain in that particular direction. There may be a thousand dollars of parts going into the deck but more importantly there is a million dollars of love going into it. If he spots it and corrects it, fine. If not...does it REALLY matter? I don't think so :)

(of course, some states require a zoning thing or building code thing, it may have to be inspected by the town when its done which, of course, would change everything)

Tomsgirl, I meant my response all in good humor. Really. I wasnt criticizing the trivial-ness of the situation, I just thought it was hilarious! I grew up with a dad who couldnt fix a darned thing, but it sure didnt stop him from trying. Now, my mom is the one with the tool shed fully loaded and she just finished laying a new floor in the dining room, building shelves for the back deck, and the list goes on and on... OUr neighbor's husband offered to loan her a saw during her last "project" and she simply said " I have purchased every saw known to man, and if YOU need to borrow a tool, just let me know!" ;)

Marilyn,

I am sure your friends will say nice things about the deck. Friends always do just to be nice, but wait until the next day when both of you are not within earshot. They will have a good chuckle to themselves about how crooked the deck is because they also don't want to hurt both your feelings.

Please, find a nice and sensitive way to bring it to his attention if you really think it is going to turn up crooked. Maybe he already knows about it and has a solution in mind or he is just not finished with it and that is why it initially looks crooked.

Just some friendly comments because I don't know anything about building decks.
Thanks for your post. Wanna know something? If the deck turns our crooked (word again) I really dont care. It will be steardy enough and if my "friends" have anything to say about it, let them have at it. Why? I have a shelf that my son built for me years ago (hes 18 now) that hangs in my bathroom. Its crooked and I love it. I will keep that forever.

Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl

You asked about telling him and you've used every reason not too :)
Understandably you don't want to hurt his feelings so lets try this. Don't say a word. When it's done, and if by chance someone does mention the angle, just say it had to be done that way to get the water to drain in that particular direction. There may be a thousand dollars of parts going into the deck but more importantly there is a million dollars of love going into it. If he spots it and corrects it, fine. If not...does it REALLY matter? I don't think so :)

(of course, some states require a zoning thing or building code thing, it may have to be inspected by the town when its done which, of course, would change everything)
Prom,
Great idea. I like your advise. We are on the West Coast of Florida so you must know that we do get a ton of rain, not to mention Charley............................
Thanks again,

Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl :wave:

Tomsgirl, I meant my response all in good humor. Really. I wasnt criticizing the trivial-ness of the situation, I just thought it was hilarious! I grew up with a dad who couldnt fix a darned thing, but it sure didnt stop him from trying. Now, my mom is the one with the tool shed fully loaded and she just finished laying a new floor in the dining room, building shelves for the back deck, and the list goes on and on... OUr neighbor's husband offered to loan her a saw during her last "project" and she simply said " I have purchased every saw known to man, and if YOU need to borrow a tool, just let me know!" ;)
Hill,
Loving you. I will be the woman with all the tools. This way, I will be the "Sharpest tool in the shed". Thanks for making me smile.


Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl

Is he the type of guy to flip out if you point out something like that? Of course the sooner you catch it, the better. Better to tell him now than later. I'd say now or forever hold your peace. Ask him is he used a leveler and tell him it looks crooked to you and tell him why. I don't know, I've never been very good at playing the woman games, the stoop to conquer, play dumb and weak to make him feel better games. I'd just tell him flat out that it looks crooked and can he fix it. Let's face it, it's either tell him, pray and hope he figures it out on his own (yeah, right!) or live with an uneven deck.

Ha, ha, very true! I think in this case, you should tell him exactly what you noticed. I mean, what's the point of not saying anything if this can still be corrected?? It just makes logical sense. Wouldn't you want to be told you're building an uneven deck when it's still time to fix it? He will have to live with it too, after all. I don't think this should hurt his feelings too much. Just say "Hmm, don't you think it's a bit uneven over there?" I find it funny women often feel like they should walk on eggshells around their man, and I am guilty of that behavior myself.

Btw, the word is 100% correct. Yes, it's official: it's crooked! :D

He probably is sensitive towards his "handy man skils" since he is not very good at it and all. This is a tough situation, relatively speaking ofcourse. Hmmm, what to do... I think if it were me I would tell him something like " I heard that decks have to be slightly crooked to let water from the rains drain, is that true"? Acting like you are being inquisitive and wanting to know... SO he will say something like "yeah, it does..." then you can say is our slanted enough... and he will then hopefully notice it on his own, problem solved.. if he doesnt then you can then say "maybe it doesnt have to be so slanted, what do you think?" or something like that.
But I do think you should tell him. This is going to be a lifelong thing and he would probably want to be proud of his work when its all done with.

TOMSGIRL - How's the Deck coming along?

FOR pete's sake - Please tell the man if it is uneven. My boyfriend is a Builder and WE, added on to our Deck this past Spring - I helped him, hey he know's what to do and how to do it and I still questioned him on everything - because I was helping and wanted to make sure I was doing it correctly.
I had no clue what I was doing, and guess what - HE MADE MISTAKES.

Funny thing too - when he had the frame of the deck secured, (or so "he" thought) he threw a board across and asked me to walk across the deck towards him to give him a kiss: I told him NO WAY - 1) I'm afriad of heights and 2) didn't look safe to me. I told him or I should say I yelled back at him for him to walk across the board - so he proceeds to and the Deck collasped!
He did not get hurt - and this is from a BUILDER :rolleyes:

He's done many projects to our home, most have been awesome but he too made mistakes - and I hang all pictures Crooked - He gets his level thing and hangs them correctly while also fixing all the holes I made in the walls. ;)

TOMSGIRL - How's the Deck coming along?

FOR pete's sake - Please tell the man if it is uneven. My boyfriend is a Builder and WE, added on to our Deck this past Spring - I helped him, hey he know's what to do and how to do it and I still questioned him on everything - because I was helping and wanted to make sure I was doing it correctly.
I had no clue what I was doing, and guess what - HE MADE MISTAKES.

Funny thing too - when he had the frame of the deck secured, (or so "he" thought) he threw a board across and asked me to walk across the deck towards him to give him a kiss: I told him NO WAY - 1) I'm afriad of heights and 2) didn't look safe to me. I told him or I should say I yelled back at him for him to walk across the board - so he proceeds to and the Deck collasped!
He did not get hurt - and this is from a BUILDER :rolleyes:

He's done many projects to our home, most have been awesome but he too made mistakes - and I hang all pictures Crooked - He gets his level thing and hangs them correctly while also fixing all the holes I made in the walls. ;)
Hey Girl,
He hasnt done anymore since he finshed last evening. "Bob the builder" is still sleeing now. I told him that I wanted him to take a break from it today. Mostly because he did so much work yesterday. I'll try to explain what a floating deck is:
The frame work for the bace consits large cement blocks at 50 lbs a piece. :eek: There are six rows with six of those cement thingies. The wood fits into a grove in the cement blocks. Right now, its just the base done. Next step is to nail the boards to the original boards that were fitted into the cement blocks. It looks like this:
_.__.__.__.___.___.__
_.__.__.__.___.___.__
_.__.__.__.___.___.__
_.__.__.__.___.___.__
_.__.__.__.___.___.__
_.__.__.__.___.___.__

The periods represent the cement blocks and the lines represent the wood planks. Looking at the "description" above, the next step is to start nailing more wood planks (16 footers) like this:
|
|
|
|
|
|

The reason I want him to take is because he lugged 35 of those 50 pound cement things from the front yard to the back yard (quite a distance) and then installed them and place the first layer of wood on them. He's not old but he's not 20 something either. We live in Florida and the temps have been in the mid 90's. :blob_fire Luckily, my son and his friend came over last evening and moved all the rest of the supplies to the back yard for him.
Ok, to answer your question about if its crooked and level. It lookes more level to me this morning and still crooked. Not as bad as yesterday or am I getting used to it? I dont know. I am going to take the advise that some of you posted here and meantion the slope for the rain.
What a visual you gave me about your man wanting you to come kiss him and the deck collapsed!! :o I am glad he didnt get hurt. He sounds like a nice guy. Fixing all the holes in the wall for you. :angel:
I guess if at some point the deck calapses on us, :eek: I will only fall about a foot to the ground. :D
If you like, I will keep you posted on what transpires today.
Thanks for your post.

Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl

Greetings,
Ok, update here. I asked him if the deck looked alittle uneven and crooked. I did meantion that I "would imagine" that there should be alittle sloap for the rain water. I told him that I read it on the web. :rolleyes: aka Healthboards.com.
Know what he said? He wasnt done leveling it and he may have to add more leveling sand to some of the concrete blocks. :bouncing:
I still dont want him to do much today, but he is like a kid in a candy shop wanting to get out there.
Thanks for all of the suggestions and help that was posted today and yesterday. I am off to go wedding dress shopping. Have a great day everyone!

Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl :wave:

I can understand that to a degree, I guess. I mean, if I were say, making a big fancy dinner for the family, I wouldn't want someone standing over my shoulder supervising me pointing out every little thing they thought I was doing wrong. BUT...if the recipe called for a cup of sugar and I reach for it and pick up the salt instead and I don't notice, I would hope someone would stop me! I don't know, I just don't get the fragile male ego. I would think the main thing would be to get it right, not to have your feelings stroked.


Men like thier toys.....grill, mower, tools, ect.

When a man moes the lawn most will stand over it with a can of bear when completed to see how good of a job they did. Same goes when building something or whatever....When someone does something good they like to hear positive or they will take it to heart.

It is good to tell someone the right thing so the job can get done right but who really wants to know the truth even when its bad?

Men like thier toys.....grill, mower, tools, ect.

When a man moes the lawn most will stand over it with a can of bear when completed to see how good of a job they did. Same goes when building something or whatever....When someone does something good they like to hear positive or they will take it to heart.

It is good to tell someone the right thing so the job can get done right but who really wants to know the truth even when its bad?
8,
Did you read my post? I did talk to him about it. Thanks for the advise.

Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl :wave:

8,
Did you read my post? I did talk to him about it. Thanks for the advise.

Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl :wave:


Oh I did read your post but I was replying with my thoughts to nini's post. I did read that you told him about it which is a good thing and I am glad to hear it didn't spauk up any arguements. hope your day goes well :bouncing:

Oh I did read your post but I was replying with my thoughts to nini's post. I did read that you told him about it which is a good thing and I am glad to hear it didn't spauk up any arguements. hope your day goes well :bouncing:
He isnt the spauk up kinda guy. He is working on the deck now and it is looking better..............


Marilyn
aka Tomsgirl Soon to be Tomswife :p

TOMSGIRL - How's the Deck coming along?

FOR pete's sake - Please tell the man if it is uneven. My boyfriend is a Builder and WE, added on to our Deck this past Spring - I helped him, hey he know's what to do and how to do it and I still questioned him on everything - because I was helping and wanted to make sure I was doing it correctly.
I had no clue what I was doing, and guess what - HE MADE MISTAKES.

Funny thing too - when he had the frame of the deck secured, (or so "he" thought) he threw a board across and asked me to walk across the deck towards him to give him a kiss: I told him NO WAY - 1) I'm afriad of heights and 2) didn't look safe to me. I told him or I should say I yelled back at him for him to walk across the board - so he proceeds to and the Deck collasped!
He did not get hurt - and this is from a BUILDER :rolleyes:

He's done many projects to our home, most have been awesome but he too made mistakes - and I hang all pictures Crooked - He gets his level thing and hangs them correctly while also fixing all the holes I made in the walls. ;)

GirlHarley, I just LOVE YOU! :D You are without a doubt the coolest, funniest, most genuine people I've ever met.

Men like thier toys.....grill, mower, tools, ect.

When a man moes the lawn most will stand over it with a can of bear when completed to see how good of a job they did. Same goes when building something or whatever....When someone does something good they like to hear positive or they will take it to heart.

It is good to tell someone the right thing so the job can get done right but who really wants to know the truth even when its bad?

I'm sorry Jeff but you are being a bit ridiculous here. Anyone can make mistakes, and a REAL man's ego is not so fragile to be completely shattered if his wife tells him that his job needs a bit of an improvement. Not to mention and expensive and demanding work like this. The man appreciated the feedback, as I was sure he would because from Tomsgirl's description, he sounded like a great guy. Being sensitive to criticims is not only a male domaine. Women are not keen on criticism either. However, there is a difference between pointing out to you where you're about to make a mistake out of simple tiredness or overlook, and between being a chronically critical person who is never satisfied with anything. Any normal person should be able to distinguish it.

I'm sorry Jeff but you are being a bit ridiculous here. .


I dont think I am :rolleyes: I am just giving my prospective....Men do honor thier toys and what they get accomplish. As for me, when I do mow the lawn I love to sit there and take a look at the job I did with honor. This is like a prize when one has done good. We like to hear opinions but rather have the good feed than the bad feed. I know if I had a nagging wife over me about missing spots in the yard when mowing then I will give her the gas can and the keys to the mower. just my thoughts..

I dont think I am :rolleyes: I am just giving my prospective....Men do honor thier toys and what they get accomplish. As for me, when I do mow the lawn I love to sit there and take a look at the job I did with honor. This is like a prize when one has done good. We like to hear opinions but rather have the good feed than the bad feed. I know if I had a nagging wife over me about missing spots in the yard when mowing then I will give her the gas can and the keys to the mower. just my thoughts..

I know nobody needs to be constantly pointed out their mistakes, and that's not what I'm talking about. I'm not talking about nagging and criticizing for trivial reasons. but I think in this case it's not motivated by criticism or perfectionism on the part of the wife but by love. The grass can grow back, but once that deck is built, it's hard to rebuild it to correct the mistake. I don't see anything wrong in gently pointing out to a man that he might be making a costly mistake.

I don't see anything wrong in gently pointing out to a man that he might be making a costly mistake.


There is no wrong here....I would like to be told myself but I do have a short temper when woring on projects and I may hhhmmmm and haaaaaa for the rest of the afternoon. I know there are guys out there that are like this and thats why I am pointing out not to be right out with the comment....sort of like beating around the bush...I would want to here " Wow, looks good " but pretend to be looking things over and mention the stone.

GirlHarley, I just LOVE YOU! :D You are without a doubt the coolest, funniest, most genuine people I've ever met.


THANK YOU! you just made my day! :wave:

And I agree with you, men's Ego's are not all that Fragile when doing home improvements - mistakes happen and that is what we woman are here for to tell them - ;)

And I agree with you, men's Ego's are not all that Fragile when doing home improvements - mistakes happen and that is what we woman are here for to tell them - ;)


How can you all determine that if most woman are having communication issues?

i can tell you, marilyn, he is blessed to have a fiance that cares so much, take it to God, he will not only give you the words...He will prepare his heart to receive it.....so PRAY---prayer changes things!

GOD BLESS!

Mina

How can you all determine that if most woman are having communication issues?

Woman are not the ones with the communication issues. It's the men who don't like listening to us from time to time or tune us out for lack of interest -
Unless....we are talking about wanting Sex, watching Sports - BUT KNOW the game and what teams are playing - ;)

Woman are not the ones with the communication issues. It's the men who don't like listening to us from time to time or tune us out for lack of interest -
Unless....we are talking about wanting Sex, watching Sports - BUT KNOW the game and what teams are playing - ;)


True, but if man are not communicating to your liking then how do you know for sure that we don't have poor ego's...even when we dont talk about our problems.

i know what your saying about men and their toys jeff...when we moved in our grass was dead! husband spent a long time restoring it and even brought a friend over one day so they could ooooh and aaaah over it....sheesh, it's just grass...lol...

i can't say he loves mowing the lawn though...he's been making me do it so he can be sure i can take care of myself if he's ever away...it's so hard though...we have a slope in our back yard and being as small as i am i have a hard time pushing it up the hill...

to the poster-i'm glad you were able to talk to him about it...bravo for you...let us know how it looks when it's finished

i know what your saying about men and their toys jeff...when we moved in our grass was dead! husband spent a long time restoring it and even brought a friend over one day so they could ooooh and aaaah over it....sheesh, it's just grass...lol...




It is just grass but watch "King of the Hill" then you will know what your average man is like :D

we do watch king of the hill :D

we do watch king of the hill :D

Ok then you should be allset Peggy Hill ;)

peggy hill huh...can't say i'm like her at all...lance says i'm like marge simpson...lol

peggy hill huh...can't say i'm like her at all...lance says i'm like marge simpson...lol


Oh...Homie.... ;)



Ok back to the topic...Well we are sorta on :D