well here goes!!l i had sex with a guy about three and a half years ago. and i recently sent him, and he looks really sick and really skinny. use to be a really big guy. i found out that he had sex with 3 women before me and he lied to me and told me he was a virgin(i was at the time). i was 15 and i had unprotected sex with him. now i get these aches in my mid stomache and im kinda scared. but since then he had a baby with some one, who also looks sick. i had surgery and im not sure if they check for hiv before you have surgery. and i also donated blood to red cross and i think they check for that. my mother told me its just my nerves but i just want to be safe. can some one please help me out.. i dont know what to think..

My understanding is that the Red Cross test for viruses, and inform you if something is present and your blood can't be accepted. Yours was presumably accepted, which suggests nothing was found.

Pregnant women are alos tested for HIV routinely (well, they are in the UK - assume also so in US).

The stomach pains sound a lot like anxiety - especially as they started after you heard this news.

There are lots of reasons why your ex-boyfriend could be looking sick. Perhaps he has Mono, perhaps he's taking drugs...the list goes on...

To put it into perspective, HIV is rare. Yes, you can be unlucky, but it is very rare. I have had unprotected sex (just using the pill) with several boyfriends, all of whom had had unprotected sex with other people. I tested negative for HIV. (Now I only have unprotected sex with my boyfriend who has been tested for HIV.) In the future, use a condom for your own peace of mind.