Hi!
Well, how to describe this...
Recently I very seriously fell in love w/somebody, but it never worked out and I got badly rejected.
I know that anybody would probably feel some degree of depression in a case like this, but I'm not new to depression.
Already before I felt very blah, but after I met this person I started feeling alive! I was motivated, even hyper - I could survive fine on 4-6 hours of sleep! I was even making great "professional" progress, because I finally felt elated.
Now, after being rejected I'm back to my mud. Unmotivated, ANGRY, ashamed, spacing, staring into nothing and even physically sick and weak! I feel like hurting my dog when she's "bad" although I love her very much!
I know that I need to change a lot of things in my life, to ultimately feel happier, but how do I do it when I'm feeling so weak?
I'm not happy with my work, not exactly happy in my existing relationship (yes, I am involved, and that's why the other thing didn't work out, although it was the greates guy I ever met!)
How do I get myself to feel excited about my life again?
How do I learn to be motivated for myself and not just to impress somebody?

Also, can you tell a difference in how you feel physically when you're depressed? Headache, dizziness, fatigue, feeling like a "zombie"?

Hi , Sweetie-
I KNOW what its like to be in your shoes. I do. I won't go into it cuz it would take too long but hey, I 'll try to give you some encouragement. It hurts, It will hurt day in and day out for awhile. Time helps. Allow time to heal you because really, nothing else will. If it helps, remember the little things that irritated you about the ex more than the loss.
Try to stay busy , get around people and realize that it just didn't work . Don't feel rejected. It happens to everyone at some time or another.

You aren't alone with this situation and you are not worthless by any means. Its just finding the right person to share life with thats kinda hard. You will. really. I did. And for 20 years, I have had the right person by my side.

But I won't forget the pain I went through a long long time ago. It kinda makes me laugh now but at the time, it hurt like the worst thing ever to happen to me. I am very very glad I did not end up with that person who to this day controls and dictates to his wife. I'd have been miserable. You need to feel equal to the person and not feel you need to tip toe to keep him.

I hope this helps out a little . Let time heal . ...

Yes I physically always have a headache, always very very tired, my appetite is bad now, I feel like eating anything will make me what to puke.

I know how you feel exactly. I just posted on this forum and am still awaiting a response. I was involved with someone for 5 years, got dumped and essentially my heart was just ripped out of my chest. It took a good 6 months to finally feel happy without him and single. Then I met what I thought was the best man alive and I fell in love with him. He was battling depression before we met and said that he was better and ready for a relationship. Well, for 4 months it was absolute heaven, never had I thought someone could care, understand or love someone like he did. Well, come to find out it was all a lie. He never cared, never loved; he did not have the capacity. He knew I was happy, but he could have cared less, b/c he couldnt care about anything in the world. As, I sit here I want to just wallow in my sadness and obsess about all the good things that we had. It hurts so bad to know all the memories I have are fake.
It does take time to get over being hurt, it really does. I am not looking forward to it at all, but you must just hang on somehow. I am in school right now so I am going to try my hardest to care and do good. Just try really hard and focus on something in your life that is good. I am also going to get some therapy at school. I tend to be obsessive about things, which makes this especially hard. I also dont have many friends, so I am really scared. I also have to sit in a class with him for the rest of the semester. But what I keep telling myself is that life goes on. While you are in pain, the sun still rises, the seasons change and the days keep going by. Everything still moves on and the best thing to do is to move on with life. It is so hard, I know, but it is a must! The best of luck to you!

Hi guys!
Thank you for your responses. Isn't it terrible how we all get hurt by relationships?!? But it always seems like it's some kind of lesson or something.
This person I met has definitely changed my life! It was like I didn't know what I was missing before, then saw it and never got to enjoy it! It was very brief, but so intense on my part!
I guess I also tend to get obsessed about people. The mistake I always make is that if I find someone I really like I try to hold on to them so tight that for them I guess it becomes a burden and they feel smothered.
So many of us depressed folks do it though! I read some of the posts here and it seems to be a repeating pattern, although it's never said directly, you can sort of sense it. But I guess we just need love more than an average person, maybe because of our past or because of just how we are - emotional.
I am on the path though to finally do things because of myself and because I enjoy doing them. With me it's always like - if I'll be doing this or that, maybe I'll gain the love of the right guy... It does seem a bit sick, but then what are the motivations of some other career driven people? Just to get rich, or get some status? But that seems so boring! Although it is more self-reliant....
butterfly,
I'm so sorry to hear about your trouble! What makes you think it was all "fake". Did he say it was? What happened that broke it off?