My boyfriend of 4 years has bipolar and has been on medication for a year. I admit he has been better since starting medication, but his out bursts are still very unpreditiable and scary. Just wondered if anyone can give me a few pointers or just some advice on some good ways of handling this relationship better. He has all the charataristics in big and small ways of some of you that i have read on the forum. Jealousy, being unrational, depressed, and not able to see that what he believes is not what the rest of the world knows to be true. He seems to lie at silly things too, is that another problem or something else? Any advice would be a great help.

welcome to the board! You will get a lot of GOOD responses on this board.

I can't speak for all bipolars but for myself, the best thing that anyone can do for me when I'm having mood swings is just give me some time alone. My boyfriend tends to be an instigator and sometimes tries to see how far he can push me when I am mad and that only makes my outbursts worse. I don't like to argue so when I explode about something the best thing to do is just let me get it out of my system and don't argue. I know it sounds hard to do because we sometimes say things that are very hurtful and downright uncalled for but 90% of the time I don't mean what I say when I'm mad. I'm not saying to ignore him but just be understanding and forgiving. It takes a very forgiving person to have a life with a bipolar like me and if he's anything like I am then it's hard to be understanding and forgiving but the effort is appreciated greatly. It's easier for me if I can just ride out the rollercoaster with the freedom to do what I need to do to get past my episode whether that be sleep all day or obsessively clean the house all night to burn off the excess energy. I don't really know what advice to give because I've never been in my friends or family's shoes to see what I'm really like but if you ever want to talk to someone who kinda knows how your boyfriend may be thinking then you can leave me a note and I'll be glad to help if I can.

Thanks for your advice, I think what you said is very true and good advice from what i've learnt so far. Good luck and Thankyou.

imagine two bi polars living under the same roof. that was me and my sister for awhile. her bi polar was very severe in the early stages at the time mine was very mild. she would walk in the house and just look at me as though she wanted to strangle someone, and i would do since i was the only one around. figuritivly of course, she never became physical. this would go on for hours, or sometimes days. then she would be fine for awhile. she would be downright mean at times and it took alot for me to learn how to deal with it. i found it best to tell her i was there for her whenever she needed me, but that i was going to give her space. i would just let her go, and only speak to her when i was spoken to. she even admitted that i hadn't done anything wrong, but that she was angry and since i was the only one around, i got the brunt of it. i could relate somewhat because i would get the same feelings, but just not as severe as hers. i would feel angry for no reason, want to just crawl in a corner somewhere for awhile and be left alone, or feel a lump in my throat as if i were about to cry for no reason. as i get older, these feelings are becoming more intense. i have seen this in others and know first hand how it is they feel. my sister just wanted to be left alone, as do i when i get in a mood. i don't want pity, or for someone to try to fix me when i am in a mood. i just want to be left alone to fight my demons, anger, feelings, whatever you want to call it. i can't speak for your boyfriend. all i can offer is my experience. i hope i have helped in some way. best wishes and take care