I'm a first time mom, and my son is 9 months old. I only work 3 days a week and on those days, my son goes to daycare. Today, when my husband picked him up, there was a red knot on his forehead. Now, there's some confusion about how the bump got there. I was told that my son was standing and something caught his attention and he fell. My husband said that they told him that they dropped him. Okay, maybe I'm a little confused. Nonetheless....he has a red knot on his head. He's a kid. This will be the first of MANY knots on the head, I'm sure.

Well, tonight while we were out to dinner, I noticed a bite mark on my son's arm. Apparently someone bit him on the arm. Babysitter went out of town for the weekend, but I will be calling her to find out who bit him, or if they even knew about this.

This is a home daycare setting and as I mentioned, this is my first child. Can someone tell me if these occurrences are normal? Or do I have reason to be pretty ticked off about it all?

Any input is appreciated.

I think conflicting stories would make me wonder too. If it was one story, fine. But 2 VERY different excuses makes me wonder. If he was bitten it is their responsibility to let you know as well, if the skin is broken(even if it's just the top layer of skin I think) he needs to be seen as he may need a tetanus shot...I would definately question them. Yes, it's the first of many bumps and owies, but you need to feel confident with the child care you have and if you are feeling uncomfortable I would say trust your instincts and find somewhere else...not nessesarily because they DID do something wrong, but because it will give you piece of mind and you will be thankful and happier for that in the long run. Goodluck.

Hi the fact that you have heard 2 different stories sends out warning bells to me.....Why are they lying etc etc....I know that cost can be involved etc, but personally I wouldnt leave my child in a home day care centre unless I actually knew the people very well....They also should have told you about the bite...Another warning sign.......Also if they had in fact dropped your child, why wasnt he taken to get medical attention to make sure he is ok ? Especially considering the mark is on his head, so was he dropped on his head ?????? Yeah I would be very ticked off and taking him out of there....GOOD LUCK

I think that since you really do not know for sure just what caused this bump to form,i would take your child to the Dr and have him checked out just to make sure he is okay.god only knows what was going on when this happened.the fact that this sitter never told you right away about the bite and the conflicting stories about his 'knot'should be sending up red flags everywhere here.Obviously if all of these things happened in just one day with this woman in charge of your childs care,she is not supervising or caring enough,or even responsible enough to be granted the privilige of caring for your child.I would run as fast as I could from this place.That is after you take your child to the dr to have them check out his neuro status and treat the bite appropriately and then send her the bill.you also might want to talk with other parents who have used this woman in the past to find out just how many unexplained incidents happened to thier children.you know in your heart that keeping your child with this woman is the wrong thing to do do.Find someone more qualified than this irrepsonsible woman.who knows what your child would end up with in just one week under her care?good luck,marcia

The fact that you can't get a straight story sends up a red flag 'cuz I would assume your child would've cried, so they could've at least told you what happened. We had an incident at our day care center where DS was out for a walk and something happened in the stroller -- he fell out. I was told by the director that she can't get a straight story as to what happened, but they applied ice and had me sign a written report. That caregiver was fired shortly afterward -- apparently for not supervising the children properly. One of the kids at the center went through a biting phase and I saw other parents being given reports as to what happened, what they did..

Another time, ds -- who RUNS everywhere bumped his lip when he tripped and fell -- did the same thing at home a couple weeks later. And I felt HORRIBLE! He was fine after a few seconds and 4 ice pops later.

I would check or report this to the entity that supervises the day care licensing in your area. The county social services handles it in our area and they inspect the day cares -- both home and centers on a regular basis.

My daughter goes to Mother's Day Out once a week. This is as close to a daycare situation I can compare your situation to. She is there from 9:15 to 2:15 and when I go to pick her up, I am given a sheet on what she ate during the day, if she cried, fell, sneezed......anything & everything is written down & her teachers will basically tell me about the falls she has or any bumps she might have gotten while she was there. So before I get a chance to even read what they wrote, they tell me.

My good friend sends her daughter to a full time day care & they do the same thing for her daughter. I went with her to check out several day cares, I do not think I couod leave my child in a home child care. To me, there just does not seem to be enough supervision, even though they are supposed to be state mandated. I would feel better if there were a lot of other adults around to keep an eye on an adult who just does not seem to follow the rules. That is just my 2 cents though.

I would definately get the TRUTH as to what happened to your sons head ASAP. Kids are kids and as you said before, they are going to hurt quite a lot, but getting hurt, and BEING HURT are 2 different things.

Keep us posted and please try to find someone else to keep your baby.

Regardless of how it happened, any head injury should have been reported to you immediately. Why didn't they call you? This is a home daycare so there are probably a few different ages intermixed throughout the day. Perhaps an older child did the biting. Biting is very common occurance in a daycare setting - or anywhere with a lot of young children. Nonetheless, any physical infliction should be reported to you. The daycare providers should know better. They may say they didn't see the child being bit, but I am sure they heard your child when he got bit! Very hard for you to know what goes on in a private daycare. My children were both in private and nonprivate settings. I prefer a nonprivate setting - more accountability and care is age-specific. Once when I went 'unannounced' to visit what I thought was a good private daycare - boy was I surprised to find chaos. Too many kids not enough supervision. The woman actually spilled half of a prescription for amoxilcilan and wanted me to pay to have her carpet cleaned! I told her she should not have tried to give medicine when a young child was on the floor in the first place.

So, try to first make an unannounced visit during the day. You do not have to give her a reason when you show up. If she seems nervous, take that as a sign that you should move your child.

DS goes to a center and several people have told me they feel centers are germ factories, too many kids... However, the children are separated by age with activities planned accordingly. Unlike a home day care there is always more than one adult around. Heck, after being home all weekend with a busy toddler, I can't imagine what it'd be like to be caring for up to 18 children within a home.

At the center, they're not propped up in front of the television. When they change diapers -- instead of lining up all the kids with diapers and changing them in a row, as I've heard happens at some home day cares -- they're taken to a changing room, use surgical gloves and sanitize the tables afterwards. I've heard stories about children in home day cares spending most of their day strapped in a car seat because the provider has to pick up and drop off older kids at school or activities.

I get a report every day saying what activities child participated in, what he ate and when, when they changed diapers and what was in them.

When I went looking for daycare, I not only checked with the friends and coworkers, but I also contacted the county, who issues licenses, the fire department who conduct the licensing inspections and I also contacted the police department and heard some scary stories.

That day I went unannounced to visit with my son, he was in the kitchen, alone, crying, sitting in a high chair. And what does she say about that? "He won't eat!" Talk about my heart breaking - it's been 15 years and I still want to cry! It's hard enough to leave a child but if you cannot afford to leave them somewhere that is certified, checked out frequently, held to standards, has routines documented, gives you a written slip each day, around kids their own age with people specifically trained to deal with that age group, I could go on - but if I couldn't stay home, I'll pay the price. My justification for paying premium was that I was working for my future - someday I will not need to pay the high cost of infant/child care and then I will have built my career up to be able to benefit and save the money. I certainly felt like at the time I was working to pay the daycare!

This is what scares me about daycare. If the infant can't talk you don't know what goes on. I stay home with my son for that reason. I know many moms must work and do not have that option. But if it is in any way possible stay home with your kids while they are young! If my baby could talk I would be less worried. I hope you get this straightened out! :wave:

I know I can't stay home with my children. I'd go absolutely bonkers. DS is a very busy boy. I have friends who've had nannies or a stay at home parent and eventually they end up sending their kids to preschool or day care 'cuz their kids need to interact with other children.

All we can do is research child care very carefully. Arrive unannounced from time to time. Ask around and find something suitable that we're comfortable with. When I was searching for day care I couldn't get my child into any of the ones that I'd heard such wonderful things about. I ended up sending DS to a day care center that was more expensive than the others, but it ended up to be the best choice for us.

Get that child out of there immediately and I say this with grave concern. Day care centers do the bare minimum. You never know who your getting, I don't care how well recommended they are. The best care comes from mom. And I say this with the utmost respect to you as a mother, but is there any way at all you can stay home with your baby? He is so much better off in your hands. You just don't know who your getting these days.

Well at the child care center I work at despite the teachers watching, children DO get bit and they DO fall down, so yes to a certain extent this is "normal". I know that you have your child in a home care. Are they licensed? If so they should be filling out some sort of "accident report" saying what time the accident occured and who was there at the time and what procedures were taken after the incident like washing the effected area. Then you should get a copy of it. If they arent licensed and have no sort of record keeping I dont recommend them anyway although not all of them are "bad". Either way you need to make some sort of documentation of it. I find it suspiciuos because when your husband picked him up there was no mention of the bite. So are they trying to hide it? I'm not intending to scare you but you need to keep record of the things that happen at the house and every time you pick him up ask the care giver if anything significant happened that day. If weird things continue to happen pull your child out and make an annonymous complaint to your local Children, Youth and Families department. Children will get injured at day care but when communication fails between you and the care giver you need to do something.

i know this in an old thread, but a few years ago, I applied with the state to open a liscensed daycare in my home. I would be allowed to keep up to five children in my home. I was applying to keep the work first kids. In order to do this, I had to have a menu, a schedule, and an emergency plan approved from social services. Also, I was told I would have to keep an incident report, and a report of when the child ate, what they ate, bathroom habits of children under a certain age, i can't remeber now, and have that on file and signed by parents every day! Now the rules vary in states I am sure, but they are pretty strict here, of course that only helps if the people actually follow the rules!!! Also, I was told that for certain injuries, the parent HAD to be called, for instance, bleeding, or throwing up, or fever, and I think head injuries, i was supposed to call and inform the parent. After hearing all the rules, and realizing it was just gonna be a big hassle, i decided not to do it. Personally I won't put my child in day care. A preschool, probably, but only one where i know the people, like at one of the local churches. However I am one of the lucky few who gets to stay home with their children, even though he isnt' here yet, I will be staying home with him when he gets here in June!

I have done both the daycare center and home daycare. Personally, I had issues with both. My son's first daycare was in a home. He loved it, and I loved the babysitter. She was very attentive. Then, I moved and put him in another home daycare which was also great. Eventually, he went a center, which sucked big time. He was getting hurt all the time and no one ever had a straight answer as to what was happening. So I got tired of it and changed daycares. The next was was even worse. So I tried another home daycare. Holy crap, I may as well have just left him completely alone at home all day. The babysitter had a habit of taking in 'troubled' kids - well, these kids would hit my son all the time - and one even pushed my son down this woman's stairs. I checked references but most of the parents loved her - mostly because she was really cheap and she would let them go a couple months without paying. Finally, I just said forget it and took him back to one of the home daycares that he went to when he was an infant. Things are great now.

If it were me, I would look for another daycare right away. Check with the licensing place and they should be able to tell you if the daycare you are looking to put your child in has had any issues. Also get references if you didnt before. And the best advice I can give you...... trust your gut. Oh, and never be afraid to stand your ground. You pay them to watch your child so you can work. Not knowing how your child is injured is absolutely inexcusable. At least in my book it is.

Good luck hun.....

I would get them out of there. Children get plenty of interaction at playgroups and preschool if you decided to stay at home with a nanny.