I've been divorced just over a year now from a very abusive man. He actually made it possible for me to continue my ED. When we'd eat at home around my son, our code for it was "fixing it". I'd eat and a little bit later, I'd say, "I've gotta go to the restroom." He'd say, "Fixing it?" I'd say, "Yes." He didn't mind one bit. When we'd go out to dinner, he knew to drive straight home so that I could "fix it".

Now that I'm single, I can't stand to go on dates, because in my state, there are very few things to do besides dinner and movies. So, everyone asks me to dinner followed by a movie. I have forced myself to go through some dates and it's so hard.

Is anyone else in the dating stage with and ED?

Hey Aidansmaid
I can't relate in the sense of going on dates but I can totally relate to situations like that. My partner always wants to go out to a restaurant and it freaks me out. So then we don't go and eventually she gets frustrated and we fight about it. So I end up forcing myself to go sometimes. Tonight for example, there's a restaurant near our house that we haven't been to. We were near there the other day and she said "why don't you meet me there for dinner on Monday night". I was like, ok I guess. So now tonight I have to go out to dinner. The thing is that it is good for us to do that stuff but we totally don't think it is. I'm already trying to think about what I will eat and if they'll have salad (because it's a japanese place). It's a vicious cycle. I can see it being difficult with a date though. It's the first time you're meeting them, you're going out to do something you're afraid of and you can't exactly tell them that or they might freak and run away screaming.
I hear ya and I can kind of relate.
Take care
Lauren

In one way, I'm glad that I'm not alone in this area, but then again, I hate that you have to go through it too. I've been seeing a guy since the middle of Oct and I told him up front that I don't eat a lot and I esp stray from things with more than a gram or 2 of fat. He still always wants to go to dinner and a movie and it gets really old, ordering lettuce and fat free ranch and having them look at me like I'm strange.

The guy that I'm seeing didn't really start to worry until I started experiencing dizzy spells and when he started noticing my hands shaking. He says that he's worried about me, but he hasn't been too forceful, other than saying, "You should really do something about this, because you need to take care of yourself." He very much likes my body and so do most men that I know. I just can't stop this cycle. I can't stop feeling fat and wanting to be as thin as possible.

I have a little boy to consider and I really worry that I'm not going to be there for him much longer if I keep this up. Everything I put into my mouth is a BIG deal, so much that I will cry at night if I've eaten more than I know is ok.

Oh, we have so many more things to think about than the average person. I can so relate to dinner and wanting to go home. Dating is all about food too. Oh, it's so hard!