I'm so far removed from my teen years, I can't seem to relate to the younger women's posts. I can't stop thinking how crazy what they are saying seems. I feel like I can't relate but deep down I've been there and had (maybe even still have) that exact same thinking! I feel like my ED has passed the really bad 10 times per day faze and I've kind of accepted a once a day normalcy for the last decade.

I've decided to battle this for the last time. I can't say I've really fought before because it's been too easy of a habit to keep and at my age, people aren't really paying attention to when and why I'm using the bathroom. I also have had 16 years to perfect strategies to hide it.

I have a very normal life, a wonderful family and this wicked problem that doesn't even really benefit me anymore. In my 20's it actually worked to purge. Now, I've messed up my metobolism so badly, I can barely eat anything and I gain weight. I also used to have so much energy and now I have to drag myself to do anything.

My main reason for the post is to find out if there are others like me out there and to find out what is or is not working for them. I'm so tired of looking for info on getting better only to get bogged down with an overload of info on what bulimia is. I know darn it, how do I fix it?????

Also, I'm going to give therapy another shot, but I need some advice about things that worked. Every therapist I've had in the past has convinced me take 5 years or so off the therapy wagon. I don't want to role play, I don't want to explore my past for years on end, I don't want to commit to weekly sessions with no plan for my recovery in sight. I want behavior modification types of therapy. Real strategies and plans!! My last therapist and I parted in an arguement after months of going nowhere when I told him I really needed a plan and he replied that he wasn't going to be able to help me with that, his job was to help me explore the emotions behind the behavior. I'm sure there is an emotional component, but there has to be strategies and I have yet to hear one other than quit puking.

If anyone can relate, it would be nice to know I'm not the oldest Bulimic (34) ever!

hi. i am 32 with bulemia. although i'm in recovery (for 6 months now) i'm aware that it could pop up any time in the future. i had an urge lastnight but realized it was not worth it. the key is to becoming happy with yourself...blah blah blah. i know you don't want to hear that. what helped me was talking about my anger and sorting out deep rooted feelings of the past. i also started doing good things for myself like working out, getting facials etc...and most important learning to de-stress. i also got rid of my husband!!!
i think recovery is different for everyone but if you are truly unhappy with your job, your relationship, family etc...it makes recovery so much harder. i hope you have support of friends and family. i had a great friend who i could talk to about my therapy sessions.it helped getting her input about my feelings, she was in recovery too for drug abuse, so we basically went through it together and are still best of friends. you are feeling the right emotions by getting "sick and tired" of being bulemic. there comes a point when you just can't do it anymore, and i hope this is that point....Good luck to you.

Thanks Betty. That is helpful. I'm glad that you are doing well and that gives me hope that there are others who have had sucess recovering after their 20's. The crazy thing about my life is, there is nothing I hate about my life other than this ED. My family, my friends, my kids, my home are all great. I'm not sure why I'm so reluctant to give this awful thing up! Everytime I try to "deal" with the problem it gets so much worse. Why is that??? It's like this little demon is inside me and and starts acting up when I try to exorcise (sp?) it!

Have you ever tried medication? There has to be a way for you to break the cycle. It won't happen overnight but you musn't give up on wanting to get better. Bad days turn into better days and the bad days will soon become few and far between. Keep pushing forward and without realizing it, the purging will become less and less. Take the focus and obsession off purging and focus more on doing good things for yourself. Gosh, I know exactly how you feel and the only thing I can say is each individual recovers differently...one day you will wake up as if a light inside you suddenly turned on and you'll be so sick of feeling the way you do.... recovery will just happen. I think you are on your way. I wish I had straight forward answers to give you but if there were right answers to life's questions the world would be a perfect place. I'm hoping for you!!!

I'm 29 with bulimia....is that close enough. :nono:

I'm 29 with bulimia....is that close enough. :nono:
We would love to hear from you!

Hey shana~
I'm 35 and anorexic, but I do purge. (no binging) I can completely relate to the way you feel! Even though I can somewhat relate to most of the younger womens posts, I find that it tends to make me go backwards, instead of forward in my treatment.
I also feel I have perfected all the "secret ways" to hide my problem. It sometimes feels like the "rush" I used to get, is gone. (I guess because it is so normal after 23 years)
I would LOVE to leave this daily nightmare behind me...to be "happy" the last half of my life.
I really wanted to say to you that you are not alone in being an older ED sufferer. I wish there were more resources for people who have been sick for a long time! Anytime you need to talk, I am a good listener. I understand what you are going through. I'm dealing with the same garbage!
Take care~
Gena

I actually know a lot of women 25 and up that have ed's. The place I go for therapy is usually filled with people our age so I haven't run across anyone younger then that with an ed. That's strange isn't it? I've been struggling with mia since I was 18 and have problems with ana as well. I'm still struggling with this...seems like it will never end. My pdoc sometimes tells me that i'm on meds that should decrease the urge to b&p but they don't. I think the main issue I have is that our age group doesn't get that much recognition as having an ed. Everyone always deals with teenagers and we're usually left out of the studies and what not. Hopefully that will change in the near future because a whole group of ladies and men are being neglected and therefore not getting the treatment they need. :nono: