Good morning everyone,

well I am finally starting a new realtionship. I told him I have H and hes seems to be accepting althought still a bit scared of it,Which I have too say I can't blame him. lol What impressed him is my honstey up front about it. I t is still extreamly new but I really like this guy. My biggest fear is that he could possibly get this and that would really crush me. I asked him to have a blood test just to make sure he doesnt have have it seeing how it isnt even a starndard test. so that we will know before we start having sex where he stands,you know my biggest fear is that when he has the blood test and see that he doent have it will not want to take that chance for me. Beacuse I have to say I have never felt so right with anyone one ever.So I thought I would put this out there and see if anyone had any suggestion cause honstly I felt like I was never going to have another realtionship again with having this. Thanks

If this guys feels for you, what you feel for him, you will have no problems. Just use caution when being intimate, and in the chance he does get it, I am sure you can work it out. If he is willing to be with you knowing what he knows, then obviously he is willing to accept the consequences. I am happy that you found someone who is willing to work around herpes and I wish you the best. :D

Your boyfriend's getting tested for herpes? I'm confused - why would he, if he hasn't had sex with you? Or are you doing this just to be on the safe side.....

I know this may sound crazy, but I have a boyfriend that doesn't have Herpes, too (at least, I don't think he does) - and it IS possible.

And besides - if you're both serious about this relationship, and you both are in it for the long haul...then by all means: herpes is just a small nuisance compared to other, bigger, worse things in life.

How long have you been dating?

Your boyfriend's getting tested for herpes? I'm confused - why would he, if he hasn't had sex with you? Or are you doing this just to be on the safe side.....

I know this may sound crazy, but I have a boyfriend that doesn't have Herpes, too (at least, I don't think he does) - and it IS possible.

And besides - if you're both serious about this relationship, and you both are in it for the long haul...then by all means: herpes is just a small nuisance compared to other, bigger, worse things in life.

How long have you been dating?

I think the poster is saying the guy she is dating will get tested so they don't have to keep worrying all the time about him getting the h - there's a small but not negligible chance he already has it and it will be a weight off her mind if she doesn't have to worry about giving it to him. Makes sense I reckon!

If his first response is willingness to continue the relationship after you have been honest with him, then that is an excellent sign.

I was herpes free and caught type 2 off my parnter. When he initially told me, i was very casual about it and felt it was no big deal, but i did get a blood test, just to verify whether i had caught it yet or not. In all honesty, i did later get tiny moments of "what if i get it", but then thinking sanely, i thought how i simply adored this guy and felt that it was no use worrying. Actually ob's can be a nuisance, but it's far easier both of us having this now as it's less to worry about.

I often wonder whether women are more accepting of males who have herpes or the other way around. Women are known to be more emotional and mothering and men tend to think very practically so i wondered if that sways the way a person thinks of herpes when their partner tells them "i have herpes"?

thank you for your replies,

We have not gotten to that stage as yet but yes it will be a weight off my mind to know for sure after all the reading i have done and to find that you can have this with out ever even knowing.so I think it will give us also a starting point because if he did have it then I guess also then it wouldnt have been me that gave it to him and if he doesnt then we can be extra cautious. If that makes any sense
I guess the weird thing in all of this is I really never expected to feel like this again about someone.I really had closed down my feelings to a realtionship at all. Now I find my self in a whole new state of mind that someone may actually accept me like this. So if nothing else it will be a learning experience for me that there are people out there that will accept you for having herpes.
We have only been dating for a few weeks but the connection between the two of us are unbelievable. So I will have to see where this leads unfortully it may not be H that breaks us up it may be the distance he is 2 hours away and that I have a feeling is going to get old real quick.
I do have a question about oral if I have hvs2 can I still get oral ...lol starting to feel like a virgin again its been soooooo long

thanks again for all your replies

That is so great, moondancer. When my soulmate and I met, we lived 8 hours apart! If it's right, it will work out. Meanwhile, you have read "Happy Couples," haven't you? So that you can figure out a routine for protecting him? It can work!

Wow, Im in your exact position. Im 19 and just started dating a new guy. I have hsv1 and have told people in the past, but telling him was soo much harder. I told him on Monday night, and to my surprise he was ok with it. He is still freaked out alot and is also going to go get tested this week. He's getting tested to see if he is positive for HSV1 he remembers using carmex as a kid, and his grandmother has cold sores, he doesn't remember if he had them or not. Im praying that it comes out positive cause I think it will make it a whole lot easier. He's impressed me with me telling him this. He has done alot of research and seems to actually be trying. Im still not sure if were going to be together, but it seems pretty good so far. :jester: