INTUITION
02-07-2005, 04:55 PM
I am a 34 year old woman who suffered a Rt vertebral atery disection 2 1/2 years ago. I was in the hospital for 1 week then discharged to my home where I continued PT, OT and ST for months to follow.
In the beginning, I coulndn't walk, talk or look at things without seeing double. I am happy to say that now I am able to walk, talk and I no longer see double :) However, I am left with numbness in my left side. My right eye has strabismus (sp?) which causes frequent headaches. I have a constant feeling of being off balance and my head feels cloudy all the time.
I have learned to live with the residual effects, it's the fact that I "look OK" that is my problem.
I have frequent moments of "overload" and just break down and cry. My frustration is that I used to be in a fast paced sales job moving upward in my career quickly. I used to thrive on multi-tasking now I'm lucky to accomplish one task at a time without getting flustered. This has to be the most frustrating for me as I'm not sure how to pick up the pieces of my life and move forward. I feel as though others are judging me by my looks and not how I feel physically.
Prior to my stroke, I was a very affectionate person. My children and I used to have "cuddle time" every night. Now I find that I don't like being touched, especially my face area. I have to make a contious effort to let my kids hug me and hug them back. Not to mention the strain that has been put on my relationship with my husband.
I have attempted to go to support groups but found that I didn't feel I had found the support I was looking for. I am looking for others who were on the same level I was when they suffered their stroke (business career, parent, wife,goal oriented).
I am hopeful to meet others who have experienced some of the things I have and who can give me some words of encouragement on how they found the strength to move forward. Is there anyone out there who can help???
In the beginning, I coulndn't walk, talk or look at things without seeing double. I am happy to say that now I am able to walk, talk and I no longer see double :) However, I am left with numbness in my left side. My right eye has strabismus (sp?) which causes frequent headaches. I have a constant feeling of being off balance and my head feels cloudy all the time.
I have learned to live with the residual effects, it's the fact that I "look OK" that is my problem.
I have frequent moments of "overload" and just break down and cry. My frustration is that I used to be in a fast paced sales job moving upward in my career quickly. I used to thrive on multi-tasking now I'm lucky to accomplish one task at a time without getting flustered. This has to be the most frustrating for me as I'm not sure how to pick up the pieces of my life and move forward. I feel as though others are judging me by my looks and not how I feel physically.
Prior to my stroke, I was a very affectionate person. My children and I used to have "cuddle time" every night. Now I find that I don't like being touched, especially my face area. I have to make a contious effort to let my kids hug me and hug them back. Not to mention the strain that has been put on my relationship with my husband.
I have attempted to go to support groups but found that I didn't feel I had found the support I was looking for. I am looking for others who were on the same level I was when they suffered their stroke (business career, parent, wife,goal oriented).
I am hopeful to meet others who have experienced some of the things I have and who can give me some words of encouragement on how they found the strength to move forward. Is there anyone out there who can help???
Sponsor
janet119
03-06-2005, 11:54 PM
hi intuition,
i was in the same boat. dissected my left vertebral artery then went on to have several more strokes due to a 90% blocked basilar artery. sucks dont it? i dont like to be touched either. i have residual spasticity and it makes me feel like a rubber band being stretched to much when someone touches me. i was in a very physical job before i got sick and had to let it go. i am on disabilty now. i wish i could give you my email address but i know they will yank it off my popst if i do. i am going to put you on my buddy list though ok
janet
i was in the same boat. dissected my left vertebral artery then went on to have several more strokes due to a 90% blocked basilar artery. sucks dont it? i dont like to be touched either. i have residual spasticity and it makes me feel like a rubber band being stretched to much when someone touches me. i was in a very physical job before i got sick and had to let it go. i am on disabilty now. i wish i could give you my email address but i know they will yank it off my popst if i do. i am going to put you on my buddy list though ok
janet
T. Logan
03-23-2005, 03:40 PM
Intuition, just a quick history of myself before answering your questionn. I am 37 now but suffered a brainstem stroke at 34,35,36 currently I have numbness on my entire right side from the neck down and in the beginning was seeing double because of my left eye was not tracking correctly. In the beginning they had me on pills for depression and I asked them to take me off of them seven to eight months after. I still get depressed about my situation but being alive to see my daughters grow up and begin to become as beautiful as my wife is inside and out makes my paine seem worth it so long as I can see another day! You see for me my strength comes from my family and freinds who constantly support me even though I don't feel I am the man I used to be I still have gifts to give and so do you. A support group maybe what you need but perhaps not, we all need inner strength when faced with situation that are this life changing. Somebody told me early on when this all began said "you will never be the man you used to be, and until you come to grips with that you are going to have problems." This made me mad, mad enough in-fact that I worked harder with my excercise program until I was at least on the outside seemed to be normal when I in fact still face the symptoms of old. Then I realized that I will have to live with this and move on and be the best damn Father and Husband I could be even though I am faced with the possibility that tomorrow may never come, I am just thankful for the day I have currently! Look for that inner strength it's there trust me you have it but you must reach for it and just when you think you cannot go any further you will grab hold strong.
T. Logan
T. Logan
INTUITION
04-18-2005, 04:15 PM
T. Logan...
Thank you so much for your words. It is nice to hear from someone who actually knows what I am going through.
I am happy to say that I have found a way for me to get out of the house and do something for myself. I was very active in my career prior to my stroke. And have found it a challange to make a place for myself in my new world. You are absolutely right when it comes to the children! I know there is a reason for everything and my reason is to be a greater part of my family life.
If you don't mind my asking, have you noticed any difference in you relationship with your wife (intimacy wise)? This is a HUGE issue for my husband and I, I truely can't concentrate on more than one thought at a time and usually it isn't that. I know it's very frustrating for my husband, he does a really good job at trying to cover-up his feelings. But I know deep down he feels as though I have checked out of our relationship.
If you have any thoughts, I would certainly like to hear them. Thanks again for your words of encouragement.
Thank you so much for your words. It is nice to hear from someone who actually knows what I am going through.
I am happy to say that I have found a way for me to get out of the house and do something for myself. I was very active in my career prior to my stroke. And have found it a challange to make a place for myself in my new world. You are absolutely right when it comes to the children! I know there is a reason for everything and my reason is to be a greater part of my family life.
If you don't mind my asking, have you noticed any difference in you relationship with your wife (intimacy wise)? This is a HUGE issue for my husband and I, I truely can't concentrate on more than one thought at a time and usually it isn't that. I know it's very frustrating for my husband, he does a really good job at trying to cover-up his feelings. But I know deep down he feels as though I have checked out of our relationship.
If you have any thoughts, I would certainly like to hear them. Thanks again for your words of encouragement.