MaudeCat
03-01-2005, 01:27 PM
Does anyone out there have or has anyone dealt with someone with a Narcissistic personality? I don't have one but I'm with someone who does. I've read up on it but does anyone have any true life stories? Thanks.
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Ruth6:11
03-01-2005, 10:00 PM
You might want to check out the Personality Disorders board here if you don't get many responses on the mental health board...!
blackplastic
03-02-2005, 03:23 AM
I know of a narcissist, he is a friend of a friend. I get hear the horror stories. He's in college and most women find him attractive -- he is relentlessly compared to looking like Colin Farrell (sp?) and Orlando Bloom by the gals who fawn over him. He had always been narcissistic, but it hit an all time high after he and his girlfriend split up. He recently started working out and pretends to see results. And he does it loudly, so whoever is in his house can hear and acknowledge the fact that he's doing so. He says things like, "I wonder if the people who hang out with me like me for my personality or do they just like hanging around pretty people..." He is also a liar. He pretends to be the hottest bachelor in the entire city, fighting girls off then sweep them off their feet when they return for more. He thinks everybody else is a peasant and the beauty that he possesses makes him better than everybody else.
I don't know what to do with him. I was talking to his roommate and we've collectively concluded that this is his way of keeping himself happy. That he's really a lonely chump, who steps on the people that allow themselves to be stepped on. And that he lies about his various escapades with the opposite sex to impress his roommate, who has only seen him with two girls ever. He points out other's flaws to take the attention off of his own. He is really an ugly person. I can't stand him.
I suggested that the roommate question his stories and maybe even disagree with his "I am so freaking beautiful" statements. As angry as that will probably make him, somebody will at least be adverse to his ********** and maybe his ego will shrink a little bit. Other people would quickly say, "Cut them out of your life."
I don't know what to do with him. I was talking to his roommate and we've collectively concluded that this is his way of keeping himself happy. That he's really a lonely chump, who steps on the people that allow themselves to be stepped on. And that he lies about his various escapades with the opposite sex to impress his roommate, who has only seen him with two girls ever. He points out other's flaws to take the attention off of his own. He is really an ugly person. I can't stand him.
I suggested that the roommate question his stories and maybe even disagree with his "I am so freaking beautiful" statements. As angry as that will probably make him, somebody will at least be adverse to his ********** and maybe his ego will shrink a little bit. Other people would quickly say, "Cut them out of your life."
kerry1
03-02-2005, 04:05 PM
Some people can change, and others cannot. All I know is - I would cut such a person out of my life. I don't surround myself with perfect people -far from it - but I do appreciate a little honesty and humility in my friends. And they get it from me, too.
That may sound harsh to some, but I've had friends like that and I never knew when they were telling the truth. What kind of friendship is that?
That may sound harsh to some, but I've had friends like that and I never knew when they were telling the truth. What kind of friendship is that?
motherpam
03-21-2005, 09:40 PM
I am trying to deal with 2 narcisstic children who feel the need to verbally abuse me whenever I do something they dont approve of like saying no to lending them money all the time. They swear at me, call me names and accuse me of not treating the family properly.
Other than to cut them off from contacting me I am not sure what to do. I have set boundaries but they just step over them.
I now have to say - please stay away from me.
very sad. :nono:
Other than to cut them off from contacting me I am not sure what to do. I have set boundaries but they just step over them.
I now have to say - please stay away from me.
very sad. :nono:
Arraicha
03-23-2005, 12:27 AM
I have a narcissistic roomate. It's *very* hard to live with someone like that. I'm glad I'm moving away in a month. He's always accusing people of having faults he has, he throws temper tantrums when things don't go his way (he's 22 by the way) and has the nerve to call the rest of us spoiled brats when we don't follow his orders.
He abused me emotionally for awhile by harassing me, threatning me and humiliating me in public because I refused to sleep with him. I've been in therapy since then and I find that I've been able to cope much better.
I think the only way to deal with a narcissistic person is to cut them out of your life. People who have a narcissistic personality disorder have spend their entire life developping their arrogance, there's no way to change them. The only way a person like that can change is after years of therapy with a gifted therapist. And that doesn't happen very often.
He abused me emotionally for awhile by harassing me, threatning me and humiliating me in public because I refused to sleep with him. I've been in therapy since then and I find that I've been able to cope much better.
I think the only way to deal with a narcissistic person is to cut them out of your life. People who have a narcissistic personality disorder have spend their entire life developping their arrogance, there's no way to change them. The only way a person like that can change is after years of therapy with a gifted therapist. And that doesn't happen very often.
swbluto
03-26-2005, 07:51 PM
I am trying to deal with 2 narcisstic children who feel the need to verbally abuse me whenever I do something they dont approve of like saying no to lending them money all the time. They swear at me, call me names and accuse me of not treating the family properly.
Other than to cut them off from contacting me I am not sure what to do. I have set boundaries but they just step over them.
I now have to say - please stay away from me.
very sad. :nono:
woh, man If I did that to my mother, she would smack me right away, but luckily she curbed that type of behavior while I was young so it wouldn't of grown into a problem in my adolescense. I think you just may have to set up ENFORCABLE rules, rules if broken that you would be able to enforce, either by taking something away or by punishing whether by labor or someother thing. And if they don't complete the punishment, you just take something else away. And when they say things to you like that, don't take it! Don't yell at them, just ground them. Cutting back on the roots of the problem will help cut the problem, and that is lack of respect and them not knowing who's the authority is. But hey, that's just what my mom would of done and I would say she's done a mighty fine job.
Other than to cut them off from contacting me I am not sure what to do. I have set boundaries but they just step over them.
I now have to say - please stay away from me.
very sad. :nono:
woh, man If I did that to my mother, she would smack me right away, but luckily she curbed that type of behavior while I was young so it wouldn't of grown into a problem in my adolescense. I think you just may have to set up ENFORCABLE rules, rules if broken that you would be able to enforce, either by taking something away or by punishing whether by labor or someother thing. And if they don't complete the punishment, you just take something else away. And when they say things to you like that, don't take it! Don't yell at them, just ground them. Cutting back on the roots of the problem will help cut the problem, and that is lack of respect and them not knowing who's the authority is. But hey, that's just what my mom would of done and I would say she's done a mighty fine job.
hanelo4
03-30-2005, 05:26 AM
I am trying to deal with 2 narcisstic children who feel the need to verbally abuse me whenever I do something they dont approve of like saying no to lending them money all the time. They swear at me, call me names and accuse me of not treating the family properly.
Other than to cut them off from contacting me I am not sure what to do. I have set boundaries but they just step over them.
I now have to say - please stay away from me.
very sad. :nono:
Hi:)
My brother is this way and it makes me so mad sometimes. If he doesn't get his way with my mom, he starts cursing at her. He doesn't care who is around or who hears him curse. His kids hear him curse and whoever else is in the room. It doesn't matter to him. He even told my daughter once to tell my mom some not so nice things when he was angry with her. My daughter is only 15. I was very upset and angry about this, but talking to him is like talking to a wall. He doesn't change and is only out for himself. I don't understand how we are so different.
P.S.- I'm sorry you had to cut your children off. I wish there was a better way.
Chantel
Other than to cut them off from contacting me I am not sure what to do. I have set boundaries but they just step over them.
I now have to say - please stay away from me.
very sad. :nono:
Hi:)
My brother is this way and it makes me so mad sometimes. If he doesn't get his way with my mom, he starts cursing at her. He doesn't care who is around or who hears him curse. His kids hear him curse and whoever else is in the room. It doesn't matter to him. He even told my daughter once to tell my mom some not so nice things when he was angry with her. My daughter is only 15. I was very upset and angry about this, but talking to him is like talking to a wall. He doesn't change and is only out for himself. I don't understand how we are so different.
P.S.- I'm sorry you had to cut your children off. I wish there was a better way.
Chantel