jambalaya_josie
03-08-2005, 01:01 AM
I have tried about three different "Ask one of our medical experts..." websites and they never respond, so maybe you guys will. I am driving myself insane, first and foremost. I have been wallowing in fear and regret since last November when the prospect of STDs came into my mind. I haven't had a day since where I didn't attempt to weigh out my odds, etc. It's driving my family insane and it's making me a different person. I feel like my life is already running out, and I'm 19 years old, supposed to go off to college in 3 weeks and I can't even get excited because I feel like doom is approaching.
To make a long story short, I met up with an old friend last summer and we had many occasions of unprotected sex. I know now that it was the stupidest thing I've ever done, but at the time I was so preoccupied with the fear of getting pregnant that somehow STDs didn't enter the picture. I took birth control pills but used no condoms. After we broke up in late September, I started getting nervous and feeling so guilty and moronic. I went to get tested for STDs in November. I was negative for everything. I went again in December, which would've been 3 months after our break-up. Still negative. I was feeling fairly confident that I could get on with life until my ex called two days ago and said he was really concerned about his personal status. He'd just ended a fleeting relationship with a former heroin addict and he admitted to me that before that, about 2 weeks after WE had broken up, he went out and had some one night stands. He said he used protection every time except one, with some girl who "felt dirty". He also started the famous "What if-ing"; what if a condom broke once and I didn't realize it? What if my ex heroin addict girlfriend shared needles and I got something even though we used protection every time? Anyway, this one night stand deal scared the hell out me. Not only for his sake, but for mine. Sometimes it seems like peoples' perception of time can be really inaccurate so now I'm all freaked out that he had this particular one night stand before we actually formally ended our own relationship and thus may have transmitted something to me. It is a longshot, I hope. He swore up and down that he never cheated on me when I asked him point-blank and told him he had nothing to lose. I'm literally going nuts. All I could eat yesterday was a cup of yogurt and today I just drank water and tea. I am scared to death, especially when re-evaluating a short cold I had last month that could have been ARS-related? Please help.
To make a long story short, I met up with an old friend last summer and we had many occasions of unprotected sex. I know now that it was the stupidest thing I've ever done, but at the time I was so preoccupied with the fear of getting pregnant that somehow STDs didn't enter the picture. I took birth control pills but used no condoms. After we broke up in late September, I started getting nervous and feeling so guilty and moronic. I went to get tested for STDs in November. I was negative for everything. I went again in December, which would've been 3 months after our break-up. Still negative. I was feeling fairly confident that I could get on with life until my ex called two days ago and said he was really concerned about his personal status. He'd just ended a fleeting relationship with a former heroin addict and he admitted to me that before that, about 2 weeks after WE had broken up, he went out and had some one night stands. He said he used protection every time except one, with some girl who "felt dirty". He also started the famous "What if-ing"; what if a condom broke once and I didn't realize it? What if my ex heroin addict girlfriend shared needles and I got something even though we used protection every time? Anyway, this one night stand deal scared the hell out me. Not only for his sake, but for mine. Sometimes it seems like peoples' perception of time can be really inaccurate so now I'm all freaked out that he had this particular one night stand before we actually formally ended our own relationship and thus may have transmitted something to me. It is a longshot, I hope. He swore up and down that he never cheated on me when I asked him point-blank and told him he had nothing to lose. I'm literally going nuts. All I could eat yesterday was a cup of yogurt and today I just drank water and tea. I am scared to death, especially when re-evaluating a short cold I had last month that could have been ARS-related? Please help.