Hello,

I am new to these boards and I am desperate for help for my 2 1/2 year old.

He is very hyperactive and does not sleep. He sleeps around 3-4 hours a day if we are lucky. He laughs at me when he is smacked or told off. He lines objects up, spins around in circles, has tantrums to the point where I no longer leave my house, hits other children, he doesn't talk much at all and when he does it's mostly just noises and spitting noise. but despite all of this he is very bright.

I have seen numberous doctors and a children's health centre and they have both told me that he could have ADHD or autism but is to early to tell. I used to run a business from home that I can no longer run it and have givin it up. My partner works shift work and we can not even talk without my son butting in jumping up and down jibbering and making noises. I have NO control over my child and it feels like he gets worse everyday. Smacking doesn't work, taking his toys from him doesn't work, time out does;'t work.

He just keeps yelling no at me and hitting me when I tell him off. I feel like my life is falling apart. The only person I have to help me with him is my partner who works shift work. His family doesn't live near us and my family just doesn't bother with us.

How do I get through to the doctors and make them understand that something is not right with my child? Please help.

Hello phoenix04,

You may want to try contacting early intervention in your area and they could test him and help with things like speech and such if they find he has delays. I think if your child is 3 or older they go through your local school district. There are programs out there too for younger kids and the school could probably tell you who to contact. The early intervention program will screen for things like delayed speech and motor skill problems and if there is a problem will give you services free of charge.
It really does help the kids. My son has improved in many areas since his diagnosis of adhd and Aspergers. I wish you and your son the best.

Becky

Hi Phoenix, my heart goes out to you. I totally agree with you that your son needs to be evaluated and some early intervention done. Personally, I would want him to be seen by a neurologist. Naturally, I can't diagnose but what you describe sounds to me like PDD (Pervasive Development Disorder) or Asperger's (which is on the autism spectrum). It definitely sounds like more than simple ADHD. If you haven't, you might want to do some reading on those subjects.

When you talk to his pediatrician, I wouldn't emphasize the hyperactivity as much as I would these other behaviors that you described:
He lines objects up, spins around in circles, has tantrums to the point where I no longer leave my house, hits other children, he doesn't talk much at all and when he does it's mostly just noises and spitting noise. but despite all of this he is very bright.
Some parents take videos of their children's unusual behaviors to show to the doctor - because, goodness knows, our kids are going to act perfectly normal when we are trying to convince someone of our concerns! Right?

The suggestion to contact the Early Childhood Intervention Program in your area is a good one. I would also push to see a pediatric neurologist. Your insurance might allow you to make the appointment directly yourself. Or, you may be required to get a referral first. If your pediatrician won't do it, I'd look for another pediatrician.

Good luck to you and God Bless! Let us know what happens.

Thankyou for your help.

I am seeing another paediatrician tomorrow and the same autistic centre he seen 6 months ago next week. Hopefully this time we get answers.

In the last 6 months he has started the lining up, hands going everywhere, running and spinning around in circles, obsessed with balloons and round objects.

He takes his clothes off all the time and will not sleep in them at all. He sweats constantly. He shuts doors all the time and makes out he is locked behind them and can't get out.

My family thinks I have post natal depression because they don't believe what we are going through with him and this makes everything even more stressful.

When we go shopping and he see's something and he can't have it he throws himself on the floor and screams and kicks and everyone looks at him and thinks he is just a spoilt brat.

Although he can not talk alot he seems to understand most things we say to him. I can tell him to get me a nappy and wipes and he does. He can play his own DVDs and turn them on and off, sound up and down. Loves looking at computers, when he plays with toys he turns his cars upside down and would rather see how they actually work instead of playing with them.

He has now climbed out of his cot and is in a bed and so I have no control over him at all now. He unscrewed the bolts in his cot and got out of the side of it.

At 12 months old he took the screws out of his security gate on his door. He steals food from the fridge and hides it in his room when I am not looking and rarely wants to eat his dinner when given it.

He seems happy all the time and can't tell when I am angry with him and just laughs at me. He talks to himself in his room at night like there is other people in there and points at the roof all the time.

He always wants kisses and hugs and does make eye contact much of the time.

Sometimes I tell myself he is fine but when he has another tantrum something just tells me that this isn't right. At night when he sleeps he looks like a little angel but I know the next morning it will all start over again.

Phoenix04,

Your child is probably too young for a true diagnosis of adhd. However, it is never too early to do research. When my son was diagnosed we found "taking charge of ADHD the revised edition by Barkley very informative. You want to be careful about what you read concerning this. Be very cautious about what to believe. WHen our son was diagnosed they did two computer based evaluations on him as well as a questionaire. THey are called TOVA tests. One is visual and one is auditory. I strongly recommend you have these tests done before choosing a course of action. They may prove that your child has adhd or may show that he dosen't. Be sure to research all medications before choosing one. (if that is a consideration). I hope this helps. I truly feel for you as we have gone through this. Believe me when I say that once you know exactly what you are dealing with, you'll see your precious child in a whole new light. I feel in love with my son all over again when he was diagnosed. It answered sooooo many questions and eased soooo many concerns. Best of luck. Please keep us informed on his progress.

My mom took me to the dr. when I was two. She said I got up at 5am and went to bed at 10pm and didn't nap. I'm 36 now and I have ADD and I'm on Straterra. My son was a nightmare at two. I couldn't get any help from the dr. so I went to the health food store. I tried the "focus" remedies they had. I also tried chamomille tea. He has always had allergies and so he takes Benadryl at night, which puts him out. The Dr. asked if I wanted to switch to a non-drowsy allergy med. I said NO THANKS. The guy at the health food store gave his son Valerian, also used to induce sleep and relaxation. I don't know any dosage suggestions though, and I don't know if any of that will help. But I couldn't get traditional help so I went to the alternative medicines. He is now 10 and on Straterra and just fine. Hope that helps.