HI all
I know I probably should be asking this in another forum, but I feel that most of you are familiar with me so I wanted to reply here.
As most of you know, I have been awarded my disabilty, and I do work 4 hours a week (not sure how much longer I can handle it, but....)

the guy I clean for seems to have such a PROBLEM with me being confined to my home when I am not at work ! I don't go anywhere (hardly) except to work and back home.....I try to tell him that I am content at home ( i use to be on the go all the time back when I could)..I also try to explain to him that it's NO FUN to go anywhere when your in pain 24-7 ! why go somewhere and try to act like your not in pain ??? it's just no fun !
this guy is Not married-I am.....so I also tell him that I have a husband to spend my time with, and he's usually home with me - why should I want to go all of the time ???

He says it;'s NOT GOOD for me to be cooped up in my house all of the time, except that one day a week that I go to work...I do go outside here at home...it's not like I HIDE in here.......I just don't have the desire to go anywhere !
I work on a few crafts here at home when I am able and I am really content with that.............so what do you all think ?? Is it not good for me to want to stay at home ?????
thanks for letting me ramble
((HUGS))
GraN

: :) Ok, gran, hehe, im not saying your phobic like me :rolleyes: , because i think it's perfectly fine to want, and enjoy staying home. The difference is when your ARE agoraphobic (like me, where i have a hard time leaving my home, or secure area, but i DO go out with hubby, and, on occasion by myself :eek: ) and then it's something ya might want to work on. Fear of not going out is different than just desire to stay home i think. But, like ya said, this may be a topic for another board???? I think it's between you and your family anyway. If your not happy with it, that's another story but people are always telling me to travel the world. I DONT WANT TO TRAVEL the world. does that make me bad..I dont think so :D

gran i am only 29 and i love to stay home. my husband two kids and i stay home and have no problems. like you said you have your husband and you do your own thing around your house. the pain does get really bad when i go out and its not worth it because then i will be in bed for a couple of days and then i will be really stuck at home. my son does go to pre k so he gets out and we also go grocery shopping. we also have a big yard so the kids are outside alot.
what does the man you clean for recommend you do outside of the house?

not everyone is the same so if you are fine doing the things you do its no one elses business how you live your life. :)

robin

HI Girls
I'm not phobic...I 'm just content at home...I have my husband, my two daughters (grown, but come by often) and my 4 Grandkids that visit often too) to me I have no reason to want to be on the run.......I guess the guy I clean for thinks that I/we should go out on a friday night -weekend....bars,dancing...bla bla bla I Use to LOVE going out on a friday -saturday night and go dancing ( love to dance) but of course I am not able to now, so what's the point ????? MAybe he would see things differntly if he was married, but he's not married , nor does he have a girlfreind.........
he just tells me it's NOT GOOD for me to stay cooped up at home all of the time.........
If hubby and I are both content at home (plenty to do that's for sure-when able) then your absolutley right RObin, no one elses business....thank you
I guess I was moreless wondering what you all thought -I just couldn't understand why it's not good for me to want to stay at home!!!!! ??????????????????
((HUGs))
GraN

:) Im right with ya gran. It always made me wonder why anyone would care anyway that i enjoy being at home. (yep, i've even been made fun of, so have just realised, i just like it at home,so this is what i do even if it dosnt please others.) and i do hope your didnt think that i wasnt thinking you had my phobia problems :rolleyes: . See, i ENJOY being home very much. I love my family and my doggies and everything about being home. I just also have a prob about going into places at times, but that's a completly different thing and i am working on that. btw, glad for your approval. Im still waiting :(

Gran,you definitely are not alone in the staying home dept.i too used to be on the go all the time and loved to go out dancing and be with friends.up until my spinal cord injuries from hell arrived, i really was a really fun person.it is truely amazing in just what being in pain 24/7,and suffering from major depression will do to a person.i also have a very profound limp in my R leg caused by the RSD,bakers cyst and chondromalacia(grade II and III) and I jus feel sooo self concious about it and feel like some kind of freak.My L hand has also started to claw from lack of nerve function that is causing the muscles there to now atrophy.i just feel much more comfortable at home.Plus when I go out my pain levels will usually shoot through the roof.I just feel more "at home"?at home.My family loves me and accepts me and i can just be myself here ya know?tell that guy to try and live a day in your shoes and see how badly he would want to stay home.Don't worry gran, you are quite normal.and if you are happy, thats all that matters, right?Marcia

Gran,you definitely are not alone in the staying home dept.i too used to be on the go all the time and loved to go out dancing and be with friends.up until my spinal cord injuries from hell arrived, i really was a really fun person.it is truely amazing in just what being in pain 24/7,and suffering from major depression will do to a person.i also have a very profound limp in my R leg caused by the RSD,bakers cyst and chondromalacia(grade II and III) and I jus feel sooo self concious about it and feel like some kind of freak.My L hand has also started to claw from lack of nerve function that is causing the muscles there to now atrophy.i just feel much more comfortable at home.Plus when I go out my pain levels will usually shoot through the roof.I just feel more "at home"?at home.My family loves me and accepts me and i can just be myself here ya know?tell that guy to try and live a day in your shoes and see how badly he would want to stay home.Don't worry gran, you are quite normal.and if you are happy, thats all that matters, right?Marcia



Hey Marcia thanks I feel better now.....I guess I look at it this way to...yes I LOVE being home and it's not like I stay in one room and lock myself up - I do go outside - so what if I don't have the desire to go to a bar or anyhwere else for that matter - right ???
besides that at home I can dress COMFORTABLY - sweat pants and shirt - eases someof the pain - seems like being com[letley dressed, shoes and all , it makes me hurt - if that makes any sense...I know it sounds silly but it's true....
I think the biggest thing with the guy I clean for, he's not married and doesn't have anyone, so he's out alot--if he had a woman or was married he would probably want to spend a little more time at home too............

((HUGS))
GraN

hey,
i know how you feel.sometimes its bad to be cooped up in the house and i know you dont feel like going anywhere but you have to get up and out! if it hurts to walk maybe get a cane or get a wheelchair. dont think im trying to be mean, but i have a walker.


{friend of unknown}

Gran I'm with you I love staying home. I'm a nester by heart I don't care for travel and lots of parties and crowds. My husband and I love to go out to eat but never any you've got to wear a tie type places. He was in the service and traveled before I met him and he loves staying at home too. We are just more comfortable in sweats and jeans and tennis shoes and t-shirts or whatever makes us feel good . My husband spent 34 yrs. at the same job and I spent at 20yrs. at two different jobs plus we raised two great children. I think we have earned the privilege of staying home if we want, AND I am very sure you have to. So ignore the people who want you to 'get out more' you are smarter than they are.