I would love to hear from anyone who is caring for their spouse at home. My husband has diabetes and is taking medication for high blood pressure since about 1996 but therein lies the problem - he takes his medication and sees his doctor but he won't quit smoking and eats whatever and however much he likes. In the past year I have taken him to the hospital 3 times only to have him admitted and cared for for a week then everything goes back the way it was. This last time he had surgery. I can't believe he doesn't realize how serious his condition is. Mostly I think it is human nature denial but then what is the rest. We have been married 21 years and have 4 children - 2 girls ages 20 & 15 and 2 boys ages 4 & 6. I am so frustrated by him I don't know if I should stop trying to care for him and let what happens happen or if I do that will I feel guilty when he passes on. He will be 46 in 2 weeks.

A person with diabetes must decide on their own to take care of themselves. You can lead a horse to water but cannot make it drink. Same with people when it comes to telling them what they do not want to hear.

Many diabetics simply do not want to give up foods they love and are willing to suffer the consequences or think complications will never happen to them.

I am diabetic and have hypertension. When I visited a certified diabetes educator my husband went with me. The educator told my husband to eat same thing as I did but more of it to meet his calorie needs. Since then I only cook the diabetic way and my husband eats the same things. It is actually a more healthy diet than what he would normally eat. Our house is basically stripped of the no-no foods.

Remember, once the diabetes is under control, then a person will be able to work in "a little" of the foods they love but are not the best for them.

Losing weight, reducing portion sizes, eating less carbohydrates and exercising will go a long ways in controlling diabetes.

I eat lean meat and mostly green veggies in moderate amounts. Recently have added a little fruit here and there depending on what I think my body can handle.

Instead of making yourself frustrated, etc., cook only enough food for everyone to have the right amount of servings, serve food on plates. This eliminates getting second helpings. Cooking the right kind of meals is about the only thing you can do for him, he must do the rest.

I would love to hear from anyone who is caring for their spouse at home. My husband has diabetes and is taking medication for high blood pressure since about 1996 but therein lies the problem - he takes his medication and sees his doctor but he won't quit smoking and eats whatever and however much he likes. In the past year I have taken him to the hospital 3 times only to have him admitted and cared for for a week then everything goes back the way it was. This last time he had surgery. I can't believe he doesn't realize how serious his condition is. Mostly I think it is human nature denial but then what is the rest. We have been married 21 years and have 4 children - 2 girls ages 20 & 15 and 2 boys ages 4 & 6. I am so frustrated by him I don't know if I should stop trying to care for him and let what happens happen or if I do that will I feel guilty when he passes on. He will be 46 in 2 weeks.
Hi! I just read your post and believe me, 'I feel your pain' I have been taking care of my husband for the past two years after he suffered a sever stroke. He has diabetes and heart problems, had the stroke during surgery for spinal stenosis. He refuses to stop smoking, thinks he knows what is best for him. I just do the best I can with him from day to day. It ain't easy. My advice to you is to give your husband an ultimatum: start taking better care of himself, take this seriously or you WALK.... You have to think of yourself and your children. Do you want to spend the rest of your life taking care of someone who didn't care enough about you to take care of himself??? Think about this. I am living proof that it can get very bad, frustrating and feeling guilty for even feeling this way.... GOOD LUCK!