I have a friend. She is 15 years old, and she claims to have breast cancer. Being her friend, I have every reason to believe what she tells me, but there are some things that don’t seem to add up. Here’s a list of the reasons that make me doubtful.

*When she was diagnosed, she didn’t have her parents with her, and didn’t want to even tell them about it. She also requested that her friends didn’t talk about or even mention her cancer.
*Her parents are leaving her to go to out of town for a week, and want her to find somewhere else to stay, out of the comfort of her own home.
*Her oral chemotherapy pills resemble perfectly to Vitamin E pills. She keeps them in a small tin (not the bottle), and freely handles them.
*After breaking the news to her friends. She waited almost one month to start chemotherapy treatments.
*Because she is so young, I feel doctors would be more inclined to operate.
*The day after her first chemo treatment, she looked not only healthy and strong, but had loads of energy and told everyone she felt great.
*Before receiving her first chemo treatment, she discussed how scared she was, which is understandable, however, she was seriously considering not going through with it because some of her closest friends were going to be out of town and unable to be there for her. Her next treatment is scheduled for when again her friends will be out of town.
*Because her mom was going to be out of town, she had first planned on driving herself (yes, illegally) to and from chemo.
*She still works many hours every weekend in her very physically demanding job.
*She recently started going to a tanning bed, which I think only adds to the stress of cancer.
*She has claimed that her type of chemotherapy will NOT result in hair loss, it would only leave a rash hidden on her breasts.
*She says that her cancer hurts, but according to other people’s knowledge of breast cancer, her tumor shouldn’t hurt.
*She has told everyone that because her tumor is pressing against her heart, she only has a little over a year life expectancy. Wouldn’t doctors want to operate immediately to remove the tumor?

I would greatly appreciate any advice or comments about what I have observed in the last few months. I hate having a sense of doubt in my mind. Please tell me if the above is all normal, or do I need to take more direct measures on clearing it all up.

Thank you.

I would be very suspicious of your friend. It doesn't sound like she really has breast cancer but rather is seeking attention. Too many things do not fit in her story and the first thing is that if a doctor suspected that a 15 yr old has any type of cancer they are obligated by law to inform the parents of a minor. She cannot receive this diagnosis on her own or be treated for it alone, as a minor!

Hi there. Well, I for one believe you have some reason to doubt her story, but this doesn't mean that she is not sick, but it could be something else (I will go into that later). Mainly because as I understand it, her parents would have to legally consent to any treatment she undergoes, as she is under the age of 18. Even if the age of consent in medical treatment is 16, she still falls below. I also doubt tremendously that she could have chemo and maintain daily routines. If you look under the general board for cancer, you can read some stories about people who have had chemo. It has many side effects, the main one being nausea and vomitting, unless she is also on anti nausea meds. However, in the late stages of cancer, the tumour would likely hurt, and may have many other symptoms, including skin texture and colour change, nipple discharge and a visible mass. My grandmother died of breast cancer, and my mother cared for her at our home till she passed. She was bedridden for the last few months, and was clearly wasting away. This is not something that is easily hidden, though it is true that there are often few visible side effects till the last part.
Here is what I suggest: Show an interest in her illness. Find out what stage she is (and it is so much more complicated than 1, 2, 3 or 4) and what her tumour is called, and what type of cell growth there is, which drug she is on. Here is some language you can use:

Names of Tumours
Ductal Carcinoma in situ (DCIS)
Lobular Carcinoma in situ (LCIS)
Invasive Ductal Carcinoma (IDC)
Invasive Lobular Carcinoma (ILC)

Types of Cell Growth:
Solid
Cribiform
Papillary
Comedo

Chemo Drugs:
Cyclophosphamide
Epirubicin
5-Fluorouracil or 5 FU
Methotrexate
Mitomycin
Mitozantrone (mitoxantrone)
Doxorubicin (Adriamycin)

A cancer patient knows their condition, especially if they are dealing with it without parental supervision. This way, you can look up side effects like hairloss when she tells you which drug it is.
This is a guess, but I also do not see how a breast tumour can press on your heart. There is a whole rib cage between the breast and the heart.
If this is bogus, this may be a cry for help...maybe she feels that she doesn't get enough attention at home (how often do her parents leave like this?). Is there anything else going on in her life that would leave her needing to know people care about her? Is annorexia a possiblity. A story like chemo treatments would cover weight loss, hairloss, altered periods, fatigue, an overall lack of wellness. Annorexia isn't just about eating, it is about deception and feeling empowered. I had a friend who became alcoholic as a result of annorexia (she needed alcohol for regular energy boosts and carried a bottle of vodka around with her at school, so her friends wouldn't notice any difference in her energy levels).
Lastly, there is a condition called Munchausen's syndrome. This is a mental illnes. The patient compulsively creates illnesses for themselves in order to get attention over and over again. They are often very well read on medical issues, and sometimes aspire to be a medical professional. They are in and out of hospitals and medical facilities with various illnesses regularly. Very often, they will go to the extreme of harming themselves physically (like injecting toxic substances) in order to make themselves ill and require treatment. I do think this is unlikely, but clearly, if this is untrue, your friend has a problem that needs figuring out. I think it may be a very good idea to contact her parents, or at least tell yours. You are a good friend to care so much. Good luck, I hope your friend is not suffering from this terrible disease. Let us know what you find out...

Your friend sounds like she wants attention. Her parents would have to be notified....by law....I don't care what state you live in. I think she should come clean and not wish something so horrible on herself. 15 is not an age for breast cancer...It's almost unheardof..............you need to have a talk with your friend. She needs another kind of help that chemo won't do for her!!

iT iS VERY OBViOUS THAT YOUR FRiEND iS SEEKiNG ATTENTiON. MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE A HEART TO HEART WiTH HER. LET HER KNOW THAT YOU KNOW SHE DOESN'T HAVE CANCER AND TALK TO HER. ASK HER WHAT ELSE iS GOiNG ON. MAYBE SHE JUST NEEDS A GOOD FRiEND. THERE iS USUALLY A GOOD REASON WHY PEOPLE SEEK ATTENTiON LiKE THAT.

Hi there,

I have breast cancer myself and am able to give some information. Firstly I would like to say that although statistically it is unlikely that a 15 year old would have breast cancer, it is definitely possible.

Now to your questions/points raised:

*When she was diagnosed, she didn’t have her parents with her, and didn’t want to even tell them about it. She also requested that her friends didn’t talk about or even mention her cancer.

Cancer is a frightening disease to have, many people that have it don't want to talk about it, that is quite natural.

*Her parents are leaving her to go to out of town for a week, and want her to find somewhere else to stay, out of the comfort of her own home.

I am not sure that this is really a relevant point.

*Her oral chemotherapy pills resemble perfectly to Vitamin E pills. She keeps them in a small tin (not the bottle), and freely handles them.

Chemotherapy pills should of course not be handled freely, but would a 15 year old girl know that? I have to say that I was not told that my oral chemo tabs should not be handled by any medical staff.

*After breaking the news to her friends. She waited almost one month to start chemotherapy treatments.

Sometimes chempotherapy treatements are timed in line with the menstrual cylce.

*Because she is so young, I feel doctors would be more inclined to operate.

It is not always possible to operate, sometimes the tumour is in an awkward position, or sometimes they try to shrink the tumour with chemotherapy before attempting to operate.

*The day after her first chemo treatment, she looked not only healthy and strong, but had loads of energy and told everyone she felt great.

That is quite possible, we all react differently to chemotherapy, some people react extremely badly while it can be much easier on others.

*Before receiving her first chemo treatment, she discussed how scared she was, which is understandable, however, she was seriously considering not going through with it because some of her closest friends were going to be out of town and unable to be there for her. Her next treatment is scheduled for when again her friends will be out of town.

Her medical team may have advised her on the importance of the timing of the treatment. It is not really possible to work around a social schedule.

*Because her mom was going to be out of town, she had first planned on driving herself (yes, illegally) to and from chemo.

Silly girl!

*She still works many hours every weekend in her very physically demanding job.

Many people are able hold down full time jobs throughout chemotherapy treatments.

*She recently started going to a tanning bed, which I think only adds to the stress of cancer.

It is advisable to avoid sunlight during chemotherapy treatments and many people cover up completely, it would be irresponsible to use a tanning bed during chemo.

*She has claimed that her type of chemotherapy will NOT result in hair loss, it would only leave a rash hidden on her breasts.

Not all chemotherapy treatments do result in hair loss, I didn't lose mine, although it did thin a lot. I have never heard of chemotherapy leaving a rash on the breasts, this sounds unlikely as it is a systemic treatment (meaning that it treats the whole body) so if it were liable to cause a rash, it would not likely be confined to any one particular area.

*She says that her cancer hurts, but according to other people’s knowledge of breast cancer, her tumor shouldn’t hurt.

Breast cancer can and in many cases does hurt, sometimes aches and stabbing pains can be felt.

*She has told everyone that because her tumor is pressing against her heart, she only has a little over a year life expectancy. Wouldn’t doctors want to operate immediately to remove the tumor?

It may not be possible to operate, in fact in a situation such as that it probably wouldn't be operable.

I would greatly appreciate any advice or comments about what I have observed in the last few months. I hate having a sense of doubt in my mind. Please tell me if the above is all normal, or do I need to take more direct measures on clearing it all up.

I am unable to say if your friend has cancer or otherwise but I hope that I have been able to clear up some points raised/misconceptions for you.

Your friend is lying to you. She does not have breast cancer. She is crying out for attention. It is extremely rare for a young lady of 15 to have a breast cancer. Because your friend's story is going to such great lengths, you would do her a favor by having a talk with her parents so she can get the help that she needs before she continues this type of behavior.

Thank you everyone for replying to my post.

My friend's story has become even more detailed. When I asked her what chemo drugs she was taking and what stage she was in, she proceeded in telling me that she couldn't remember the name of the drug, but it started with an "S" and she was in the "early stage', but she couldn't remember the name to that either. This new information upset me because I knew she was and still is lying to me. Somehow this breast cancer has spread to her lung! Her doctor doesn't know how that happened and now she is going to get a second opinion from another doctor. :rolleyes: Since her first treatment over a month ago, she hasnt mentioned anything else about having another chemotherapy session.

Thank you for support again, and feel free to post if you have any more ideas. I do believe she's lying, but time will eventually tell.

If the cancer spread to her lung she would be by now on some very aggressive chemotherapy treatment where she would lose her hair, make her tired, nauseous, etc. You would notice a difference in her. You can't walk around with metastatic breast cancer and undergo chemotherapy and be like nothing is happening to you.

I would try to expose the lie. When you talk to her why don't you ask her how she can live everyday without telling her parents she has a life-threatening illness? Or how come the doctors haven't informed her parents since she is a minor and you know for a fact that it is illegal to treat a minor without parental consent. Innocently ask her these pointed questions and see how she responds. If she doesn't lash out at you by saying that you don't believe she has cancer she may start thinking that you are suspicious of her and that her story just isn't holding up anymore. She may not like you anymore or want to be friends but she needs to get to the bottom of this need for attention. It needs to be dealt with and sometimes unfortunately it's those nearest to the person in need who get burned! Best of luck...