ASDGRMama
04-18-2005, 12:12 AM
My baby (a boy: Asher Nathaniel) died around 17 weeks in November. I was due April 8th. I had a miscarriage (6 weeks) April 9th, the day after my due date and my SIL who was due April 19th had her baby on the 12th (a boy: Andrew).
I just got back from a family gathering and held Andrew for quite some time. I just ache. What I wouldn't give to be tucking in my precious baby boy next to me and nursing him to sleep right now. Or even walking the floor with him at 2am.
My heart is so heavy. I wanted her desperately to have a girl so I wouldn't have to watch her son grow up knowing that my little boy would be the same age doing the same things. They would have been good buddies; Asher and Andrew.
I'm just very sad today.
Love and Prayers, Kelly
I just got back from a family gathering and held Andrew for quite some time. I just ache. What I wouldn't give to be tucking in my precious baby boy next to me and nursing him to sleep right now. Or even walking the floor with him at 2am.
My heart is so heavy. I wanted her desperately to have a girl so I wouldn't have to watch her son grow up knowing that my little boy would be the same age doing the same things. They would have been good buddies; Asher and Andrew.
I'm just very sad today.
Love and Prayers, Kelly
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brixylake
04-18-2005, 07:35 PM
I can't even imagine how hard that is. I just learned today that I am in the process of miscarrying. My Beta HCG levels dropped significantly, like from 26,000 to 1,600 in a month. My sister had a baby on Nov. 11, and my baby was due Nov. 12. I was 10 weeks yesterday. I am sad, but sure I will be even more sad as time goes on. I hope you are able to heal and enjoy your nephew. Good luck!
Noel's girl
04-18-2005, 11:26 PM
I know exactly how you feel I had A miscarriage about 7 weeks ago and one of my good friends and I were both pregnant at the same time, we were exactly a week apart. It is hard to see her now in maternity clothes and knowing that i would be at that stage right know. I know it will be hard to go to the hospital when the baby is born and hold that baby in my arms knowing that I would have a baby of my own at that time. So me, and I am sure a bunch of people on this board know exactly how you feel and are here for you. I am going through a hard time right now also with the miscarriage it has just been a rough week, af made a visit and that along with the miscarriage having been just 7 weeks ago it just hard sometimes to get through the day with a smile on your face. You are in my thoughts and prayers that some way, it gets easier on your heart with your nephew.
tamaraheiner
04-19-2005, 06:59 PM
Noel's girl, af came?
Noel's girl
04-20-2005, 12:38 AM
Yes on the 14 of April waiting for her to be over, don't miss her at all. And can't wait to start trying again. We can not start officially trying again until June 2, and it seems so far away. What about you, you and dh are trying now right?
tamaraheiner
04-20-2005, 02:26 PM
yeah, we're trying
and actually we've been trying but so far nothing's happening
it worries me but not too much, i've read so much on m/c since it happened, and sometimes a woman doesn't even ovulate the first two or three months afterwards. hopefully by july my body will feel more on schedule.
i'm feeling much more patient than i was right after the m/c. when it happens it happens, and i'll just try to get myself as fit as possible until then
and actually we've been trying but so far nothing's happening
it worries me but not too much, i've read so much on m/c since it happened, and sometimes a woman doesn't even ovulate the first two or three months afterwards. hopefully by july my body will feel more on schedule.
i'm feeling much more patient than i was right after the m/c. when it happens it happens, and i'll just try to get myself as fit as possible until then
Noel's girl
04-20-2005, 09:43 PM
I agree with you whole heartedly.
tamaraheiner
04-22-2005, 05:59 PM
you have just one more month to go?
we'll probably get pg around the same time...i think it depends a lot on when our bodies heal
we'll probably get pg around the same time...i think it depends a lot on when our bodies heal
willsmommy
04-22-2005, 08:54 PM
Kelly, I just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you and am so sorry for the loss of your son. I have had a very similiar experince myself, having lost my first baby Joshua at a similar stage (a bit later) on and my sister was alos pregant and in fact had her baby 7 days before Joshuas due date. I know exactly how you feel, on the one hand you love your beautiful nephew and are happy for your sister and yet at the same type it hurts you and makes you think - that how it should have been for you. If its any consilation, this hurt will dull and the connection is not there any longer. I now look at my neice and love her so much for her, the connection long gone. Yet on her birthday I always think wow thats how old our son should have been. Its always hard losing a baby later on inprgenancy when you are pretty close to actually having your little one. I also have suffered m/c after losing Joshua ( 2 infact of which 1 was a blighted ovum) BUT I now have 3 kids - a daughter and two sons, the youngest of whom is just 1. So its not the end but just the start. Thinking of you, I know you grief only too well. xx
Noel's girl
04-27-2005, 12:21 AM
I am hoping to get pregnant as soon as the 3 month mark is up which will fall about June 2. ~Baby Dust~ to all of us!!
Cora28
05-29-2005, 09:11 AM
How long do your doctors make you wait before you can start trying again? I had my miscarriage in February and have to wait until September before we can try again. This is so hard for me right now. It seems like everyone in the world is pregnant, and I'm stuck in the terrible waiting game. Each time I go to the doctor for my blood work, I cry and get all emotional again. My sister in law just announced yesterday that she is pregnant and my heart just sank. I am happy for her, but sad for myself. I have to watch her whole pregnancy and it just saddens me to think about it. I wish it was me. I feel so terrible for being sad and angry, but I can't control my emotions. People keep saying it will happen for you one day soon, but that doesn't erase the pain I am in right now. I know everyone means well, but unless you are going through a molar pregnancy no one knows how it feels. The worst part for me is this terrible waiting game. Can anyone help?
~cora28
~cora28
Cupcake3
05-31-2005, 04:29 PM
Cora,
I know exactly how you feel. I lost my baby 1 month ago. I am still having physical issues like a bladder infection since the D&C.
It seems that everywhere I turn there are folks pregnant. Right now as I am typing there is a lady sitting in my reception. I know she is approx 4-5 months. Which is where I would have been right now approx 20 weeks, she is rubbing her stomach and looks to be enjoying her pregnancy... This also makes me upset and angry. I really cannot have anyone mention it to me as I get emotional and I take it out on my partner. Everywhere someone has a little bump and I feel all this pain and nothing to show. Especially you know where you did everything possible to make it a healthy pregnancy. And you have to question how do drug addicts and alocholics have healthy babies??? and this happens to us??? What went wrong..........
Even one of my good friends is expecting and we would have been due around the same time, now I have to look at her when she has her baby. Do not think that I can handle going to her shower, I will just send a gift.
AT the end of the day, you really just have to be happy and try to move on. I know that it is hard, as I am struggling everyday quietly to myself and trying to stay focused on building my home..
Hugs and kisses everything will work out soon. Have fun until Sept....Take a trip somewhere..... Feel better soon.
Cupcake.......
I know exactly how you feel. I lost my baby 1 month ago. I am still having physical issues like a bladder infection since the D&C.
It seems that everywhere I turn there are folks pregnant. Right now as I am typing there is a lady sitting in my reception. I know she is approx 4-5 months. Which is where I would have been right now approx 20 weeks, she is rubbing her stomach and looks to be enjoying her pregnancy... This also makes me upset and angry. I really cannot have anyone mention it to me as I get emotional and I take it out on my partner. Everywhere someone has a little bump and I feel all this pain and nothing to show. Especially you know where you did everything possible to make it a healthy pregnancy. And you have to question how do drug addicts and alocholics have healthy babies??? and this happens to us??? What went wrong..........
Even one of my good friends is expecting and we would have been due around the same time, now I have to look at her when she has her baby. Do not think that I can handle going to her shower, I will just send a gift.
AT the end of the day, you really just have to be happy and try to move on. I know that it is hard, as I am struggling everyday quietly to myself and trying to stay focused on building my home..
Hugs and kisses everything will work out soon. Have fun until Sept....Take a trip somewhere..... Feel better soon.
Cupcake.......
Cora28
05-31-2005, 10:40 PM
Cupcake,
Thanks for your sweet reply. It feels so good to talk to someone who understand what this feels like. This is even different from just a miscarriage because of the waiting. I am so angry too. My sister-in-law just announced her pregnancy to the family and I just wanted to scream, so I left and drove around and just cried and had a really good pity party for myself. I hope all this pain equalls a baby for us in the very near future!!!
Good luck to you too!
Cora28
Thanks for your sweet reply. It feels so good to talk to someone who understand what this feels like. This is even different from just a miscarriage because of the waiting. I am so angry too. My sister-in-law just announced her pregnancy to the family and I just wanted to scream, so I left and drove around and just cried and had a really good pity party for myself. I hope all this pain equalls a baby for us in the very near future!!!
Good luck to you too!
Cora28
Cora28
05-31-2005, 10:40 PM
Cupcake,
Thanks for your sweet reply. It feels so good to talk to someone who understands what this feels like. This is even different from just a miscarriage because of the waiting. I am so angry too. My sister-in-law just announced her pregnancy to the family and I just wanted to scream, so I left and drove around and just cried and had a really good pity party for myself. I hope all this pain equalls a baby for us in the very near future!!!
Good luck to you too!
Cora28
Thanks for your sweet reply. It feels so good to talk to someone who understands what this feels like. This is even different from just a miscarriage because of the waiting. I am so angry too. My sister-in-law just announced her pregnancy to the family and I just wanted to scream, so I left and drove around and just cried and had a really good pity party for myself. I hope all this pain equalls a baby for us in the very near future!!!
Good luck to you too!
Cora28
Cupcake3
06-01-2005, 10:07 AM
Hey Cora,
I know how you are feeling.
take it easy.. Time will heal everything...
We will both get our chance very soon.. I know it.
THis is all new to me and a learning experience. Although I want to try again I am scared of this happening all over and do not know if I can handle it again. In the mean time lets try to have a good summer, eat healthy, take our vitamins, exercise and enjoy life.. In September you will be able to try again. I think that is when I will be ready as well. Although my home will not be finished until Dec. I cannot wait until the new year. I will be 37 in Aug and time is running out....and more so that I was looking forward to my little one.. So I will have a go at it in September like you....
Take care of yourself..
I know how you are feeling.
take it easy.. Time will heal everything...
We will both get our chance very soon.. I know it.
THis is all new to me and a learning experience. Although I want to try again I am scared of this happening all over and do not know if I can handle it again. In the mean time lets try to have a good summer, eat healthy, take our vitamins, exercise and enjoy life.. In September you will be able to try again. I think that is when I will be ready as well. Although my home will not be finished until Dec. I cannot wait until the new year. I will be 37 in Aug and time is running out....and more so that I was looking forward to my little one.. So I will have a go at it in September like you....
Take care of yourself..
weepyone
06-01-2005, 10:32 AM
sorry to sound dumb but why do you have to wait so long? i understand if this is personal choice to wait but my midwife said i could try after my next proper period.
Cupcake3
06-01-2005, 11:19 AM
I guess it depends on your Dr and how far along you were in your pregnancy. Some dr's prefer you wait to let your body heal. I can start trying right away, but I prefer to wait as I have a building project going on and I want to be involved even though my father has taken over completely and all my interior designing has been completed....
Jordyn
06-01-2005, 12:39 PM
My doctor has said to wait a few months to let my hormones get back to normal...except she's doing nothing to monitor them, did not do an internal or any type of physical at all. She has scheduled an ultrasound (Friday) and on the bottom of the referral wrote pt. may have had miscarriage, passed clots and had cramping.
So now I am thinking does she think I did have one, did not have one and was never pregnant or could I still be pregnant...I had a negative urine test and don't really feel as pregnant as I did earlier.
Since I had only found out the day before I starting spotting that I might even be pregnant (and was only 11 days late when the spotting occurred) I know this was a very early pregnancy. I really feel we can start trying right away but maybe this is bad of me to feel this way. I will wait till after Friday to make a decision (won't be ovulating yet anyway).
Any thoughts here?
So now I am thinking does she think I did have one, did not have one and was never pregnant or could I still be pregnant...I had a negative urine test and don't really feel as pregnant as I did earlier.
Since I had only found out the day before I starting spotting that I might even be pregnant (and was only 11 days late when the spotting occurred) I know this was a very early pregnancy. I really feel we can start trying right away but maybe this is bad of me to feel this way. I will wait till after Friday to make a decision (won't be ovulating yet anyway).
Any thoughts here?
Cora28
06-01-2005, 08:13 PM
Cupcake,
You are right. I need to slow down. It is so easy to want to press the fast forward button. My husband and I waited 6 years to have kids and when we started I never imagined we would have problems. Now I just want to try again. In the big picture of life, 3 more months is not that long. I know I can do it since I have already waited 3 so far. I hope we both have good results this fall and that the next few months will be kind to the both of us. :)
Thanks for being a sounding board for me. I have needed to talk to someone who understands for so long.
Cora28
You are right. I need to slow down. It is so easy to want to press the fast forward button. My husband and I waited 6 years to have kids and when we started I never imagined we would have problems. Now I just want to try again. In the big picture of life, 3 more months is not that long. I know I can do it since I have already waited 3 so far. I hope we both have good results this fall and that the next few months will be kind to the both of us. :)
Thanks for being a sounding board for me. I have needed to talk to someone who understands for so long.
Cora28
Cora28
06-01-2005, 08:17 PM
weepyone,
I don't want to wait, but the doctor says I have to. She said that with a molar pregnancy, if all the stuff didn't get removed in the D&C that there is a small chance the molar could start regrowing or something like that. (This is all really foggy to me because as she was telling me this, I was crying.) I have to go every month for a blood test to make sure that my HCG levels are still negative. They have been for three months and I want to start trying again, but I don't have my doctor's approval until the 6month mark... Your midwife said you could start trying anytime???
Cora 28
I don't want to wait, but the doctor says I have to. She said that with a molar pregnancy, if all the stuff didn't get removed in the D&C that there is a small chance the molar could start regrowing or something like that. (This is all really foggy to me because as she was telling me this, I was crying.) I have to go every month for a blood test to make sure that my HCG levels are still negative. They have been for three months and I want to start trying again, but I don't have my doctor's approval until the 6month mark... Your midwife said you could start trying anytime???
Cora 28
Cora28
06-01-2005, 08:25 PM
Cupcake3,
I was only 6 weeks along when we found out about the molar. I had no complications before finding out,and I had no complications during or after the D&C. My HCG levels dropped quickly to negative (4 weeks) and then I started going to the doctor once a month for monthly blood tests She said this was standard and even mentioned that some doctors make you wait a year to start trying again. Do you have to do the blood test thing? My doctor said I had the best case scenario, but still is making me wait.....
I was only 6 weeks along when we found out about the molar. I had no complications before finding out,and I had no complications during or after the D&C. My HCG levels dropped quickly to negative (4 weeks) and then I started going to the doctor once a month for monthly blood tests She said this was standard and even mentioned that some doctors make you wait a year to start trying again. Do you have to do the blood test thing? My doctor said I had the best case scenario, but still is making me wait.....
Cupcake3
06-02-2005, 02:30 PM
Cora,
You will be fine.
take you time. September will be here before you know it..
Talk soon.
C.
You will be fine.
take you time. September will be here before you know it..
Talk soon.
C.