I don't know how to handle this situation...

maybe you all can help... or relate...or whatever.

I do theatre - and in this particular show that I'm beginning right now, there are three girls i'm sharing the stage with and we all appear in one piece bathing suits at one point. The other girls are bigger than me and maybe it's just my stupid mind, but I feel like the only thing I EVER hear being talked about is crash dieting methods and how FAT they are and how OMG It's so depressing that htey have to wear suits onstage and how can they lose before we open the show?

And then yesterday our whole CAST was sitting talking about pills that help you lose weight and one person said, "I took such and such pill nad it was awesome! Although one day I came to work and my heart was beating sooooo fast!" And I had been listening silently and said, kind of sweetly, not too seriously "That's not a good thing!" and I get told "not all of us are blest with your metabolism!"... lovely assumptions huh... if htye only knew.

I feel like all I've heard for days now is about dieting adn weight and body image and I'm watching these other girls eat granola and power bars and drink teas and say "that's lunch for today!" Well... maybe they can do that and stand to lose some pounds without being in danger, but A) it's still not the right way to lose weight and B) (this is the worst part of all) how am I supposed to eat normally when it'll look like I'm eating MOUNTAINS of food next to what they consume?? I offered people a piece of a reeses I was eating yesterday (self proclaimed junk food addict here) and they all proudly refused and I felt like the pig of hte century even though I am doing the worst i've ever done at this point as far as my weight being low and what I consume.

The sad thing is I was doing so so so well - I wasn't depressed at all I was happy and I was having at least SOMETHING to eat every day... i feel horrible now. Suddenly I'm having rediculous mood swings again where out of nowhere I want to CRY about things and just be away from people... of course that's not easy to do when I have to go sing and dance and smile and entertain onstage.

How do I avoid their comments and their diet talk and what not... how? I mean I'm not comfortable being in a bathing suit onstage either... but my feelings on that matter are not considered worthy because i am the smallest one between us... i can't believe the insensitivity towards the matter... :(

Just needed to vent and maybe feel support. I just have to keep my mouth shut when they talk about it.

Hi there
I can relate to a lot of what you are talking about. It is REALLY hard to be around people who are ALWAYS talking about weight loss, food, dieting, etc. That happens at my work too. Odds are it happens everywhere. I am a therapist (go figure) at a mental health agency. We get a lot of drug reps that come in and bring all kinds of cookies, candy, dunkin donuts, etc with their drug names all over them. So they are in with the secretaries. Being anorexic and a restricter I try to stay away from that stuff. We have a new secretary who gets on my case all the time saying "god you should eat some, what are you on a diet? You're so skinny!" I don't know what to say to her. What I really want to say is "Shut up chickie! You have NO idea at what cost did I get this figure!" But being in a "professional environment" thats probably not the best idea.
I know what you mean about your opinion on weight, dieting and body image and all that stuff not being worthy enough because of your size. It's really hard to deal with, especially with the amount of emphasis society puts on a person's size and shape. People don't understand that just because we are skinny that it was easy for us, or we have a fast metabolism or whatever. I mean, there is a HUGE physical and mental cost to what we do to ourselves. Unfortunately, there's not much we can do to convey this without airing all of our own crap out on these people.
So if I were you I would try to walk away from the conversation when it's possible, change the subject, or make a direct comment like "I'm really not comfortable talking about this and I have my reasons, so could we please talk about something else?" Or something like that. It depends on what you want to tell them. If anything.
Well, I'm here to support you and hang in there.
Lauren

Hi Ladies! I can definitely relate. My life is consmed by food from the time I wake up until I go to sleep. I have a double whammy. I'm a PT (so I'm obsessed with being fit) and I'm in charge of my club's nutritional program. Even my dreams are about food, calories, numbers and exercise. I'm currently trying to switch careers because I really need to remove myself from it.
I wish I had some advice, but I just wanted to let you know that I can relate. Let us know how things are going!
:confused:

Hey there,

I know exactly how you are feeling. My girlfriends arent diets constantly or anything, but they always talk about weight and how much they have eaten in a day and its sooo hard for me to listen to. Even though i am probably about a year recovered (healthy weight that is), its so hard to hear b/c it makes me feel like a cow for eating normally and being a normal size. They say things like 'oh man none of my clothes fit, im not giong to eat until they do' and even though they dont mean it, it just makes me feel like i have to revert back to my old ways. Its such a vicious cycle here. ED's never go away, no matter how much you think you've beaten them.

What i do when they start to talk about it is i just sit there quietly or try to add a comment to change their thinking about weight loss. Like suggesting a healthy way just so they get off the topic and realize starving yourself or throwing up isnt the way to go. Whats funny is that they all know about my past and current struggles with food and body image, yet they still bring it up around me. I dont want people to be walking on eggshells or anything, but it would be like bringing up drugs around a recovering drug addict.

I like the reference to not talking about drugs around drug addicts. It feels like everyone around me is talking about their diet .......

Yes, i agree, sometimes it does feel like everywhere i turn that people are concerned w/ diets, weightloss and body images. Its soooooo hard to hear. I think part of it is though that we are so attune to information and knowledge about weightloss, calories, exercise etc that we notice or read into what people are talking about far too much. Its sort of hard not too...but i still notice i do it most of the time.

hi everyone...
i am coming at this from the opposite perspective. i used to be 50 lbs heavier and my weight has always been a point of contention...i dont consider myself as having an ED ( so i dont know if i should be posting here, sorry if i cause any offense) but i am very conscious about what i eat b/c i am concerned about getting big again. the thing is, my friends (who are mostly fit) dont understand that i have a slower metabolism (or i am just not very good at regulating or being conscious of how much i consume) and that i need to watch everything i eat and exercise alot.. and they dont understand i cant just eat whatever... i am not sure if this is helpful at all..probably counter-helpful..anyways, i guess in qualifying as one of the people that annoy you with constant discussions about diets, etc.. has given me some perspective... so thanks.