Sugaboy
05-23-2005, 12:51 AM
Well I will try to make things short so I dont bore you all to death, but I truly believe that I have the oddest case of OCD. I am at the point right now where I am so fukin fed up with this, as it is eating my life away (Im 24), and just want to stand up and argh...shh.
I have ocd when I buy new electronics, but only ones that are portable and I carry with me, meaning lots of hand contact - cell phones, laptop, etc. My OCD is only on my laptop right now but I do consistently get it from time to time when I buy new electronics. I bought my laptop in sept 2004, I analzye the item for problems when I get it and blow it way out of proportion, really problems so minor no one would make it a big deal.
Anyways, there is this one spot on my laptop its the right side of the palm rest that I cant stop touching with my palm and palm only. I felt at first the plastic wasnt solid, as it gave in a bit, bit of creaking (it is completely normal, since it is plastic). if you are unclear what I mean by "plastic creaking" well get a piece of hard plastic, like say your own keyboard, cordless phone, cell phone, whatever, and press certain spots and listen, you will know what I mean. But i could never learn to accept this and live on with my life. Like everyone else, I baby stuff when first bought, but this is way overboard and dragging on for way too long.
I honestly dont know how the heck I am unable to remove this compulsion. So everytime I am using my laptop, I get the urge of touching the spot with my right palm everytime. And when I do it once, it goes 2x, 3x, 4x and on and on, sometimes for hours and it keeps me up at night. God knows how many times ive pressed on this spot or around it since i bought the laptop, but ya obviously its made it worse than when it was new. Not broken or anything, it works fine, but still again most people wont notice, but it bothers me knowing the problem is still there. A problem that I can only see.
I am unhappy I guess you could say. I wish I could just do anything to get a new laptop and change this one. I know 100% that will make my OCD go away, at least for the meantime, but I know it wont happen - i cant afford it and it would be stupid when this one works fine. But when I first bought the laptop, I had the 2 weeks to exchange and I did that about 7 times because I was so overly paranoid about minor minor stuff. Ex- tiny mark, sticker wouldnt come off, just out of this world stuff that I cant tell people or they laugh. Like I said earlier, I am just freaking sick of this eating away my life and want to be able to use my laptop like all the other people - NORMALLY!
I have ocd when I buy new electronics, but only ones that are portable and I carry with me, meaning lots of hand contact - cell phones, laptop, etc. My OCD is only on my laptop right now but I do consistently get it from time to time when I buy new electronics. I bought my laptop in sept 2004, I analzye the item for problems when I get it and blow it way out of proportion, really problems so minor no one would make it a big deal.
Anyways, there is this one spot on my laptop its the right side of the palm rest that I cant stop touching with my palm and palm only. I felt at first the plastic wasnt solid, as it gave in a bit, bit of creaking (it is completely normal, since it is plastic). if you are unclear what I mean by "plastic creaking" well get a piece of hard plastic, like say your own keyboard, cordless phone, cell phone, whatever, and press certain spots and listen, you will know what I mean. But i could never learn to accept this and live on with my life. Like everyone else, I baby stuff when first bought, but this is way overboard and dragging on for way too long.
I honestly dont know how the heck I am unable to remove this compulsion. So everytime I am using my laptop, I get the urge of touching the spot with my right palm everytime. And when I do it once, it goes 2x, 3x, 4x and on and on, sometimes for hours and it keeps me up at night. God knows how many times ive pressed on this spot or around it since i bought the laptop, but ya obviously its made it worse than when it was new. Not broken or anything, it works fine, but still again most people wont notice, but it bothers me knowing the problem is still there. A problem that I can only see.
I am unhappy I guess you could say. I wish I could just do anything to get a new laptop and change this one. I know 100% that will make my OCD go away, at least for the meantime, but I know it wont happen - i cant afford it and it would be stupid when this one works fine. But when I first bought the laptop, I had the 2 weeks to exchange and I did that about 7 times because I was so overly paranoid about minor minor stuff. Ex- tiny mark, sticker wouldnt come off, just out of this world stuff that I cant tell people or they laugh. Like I said earlier, I am just freaking sick of this eating away my life and want to be able to use my laptop like all the other people - NORMALLY!
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Sugaboy
05-23-2005, 12:56 AM
So anyhow, I have seen a counsellor about it, in fact two and they have been unable to help me. Delaying thoughts didnt work for me, but Im at the stage right now where I am thinking of setting myself a goal. Everytime I dare to touch this one spot on my laptop, that I would have to do a chore, something that I absolutely hate and dont want to do. This will encourage me to not touch the spot and the longer I can handle this, it will make me forget about my ocd. But I cannot think of what chore i can make myself do everytime I touch the spot.
ex - running around my block without stopping. I live on a huge block, takes 30mins just to walk it.
ex - no masterbating for a week. But how hard would this one be?
Who is going to be here to make me do it, right? I need something to enforce this on me and with authority!!!!!!!!!!!!
ex - running around my block without stopping. I live on a huge block, takes 30mins just to walk it.
ex - no masterbating for a week. But how hard would this one be?
Who is going to be here to make me do it, right? I need something to enforce this on me and with authority!!!!!!!!!!!!