Hello,

I am sorry to post this here but I feel it may help.
I have been living with OCD for about 5 years and have learnt to live with it to a certain extent. I recently got tested after a relationship with a female for non-OCD reasons. After not having any OCD thoughts for about 6 months they are creeping back in after this one incident:

I was on the train and just happen to see the man infront of me hold up a bleeding palm. I tried to dismiss the thought and when I went home I went home and (I'm sorry to describe this) masturbated. I guess afterwards i had feelings of guilt and began to imagine that I had the man's blood on my hands and somehow transmitted HIV to myself.

Can someone tell me that this is irrational and why. I keep fearing, even though I know you can't that the virus survived and traveled home with me.
The virus has to b e transmitted instantly doesn't it?

Sorry for being an irrational fool...

Well, you're not a fool. HIV dies quickly, so you really, most likley, have nothing at all to worry about. Have you been to counseling for your OCD? Has it been about contracting HIV? I hope this helps.
-S-

Hi, I'm ocd too and going to see a counsellor next month for the first time. I have been using this board for a while now and i was told HIV cannot live for long outside the body. Two minutes someone said. Hope this helps.

I fear HIV really badly. I convince myself every day that i have all the symptoms but cant pluck up the courage to test.

I'm kinda the same way. I tested negative for an HIV test, but I still think that I may have it. I bought some jeans from the mall and the fabric from the inside was rubbing my leg until it left a small scab. I started to think that I could have gotten something from the jeans!. It's scary!!!

Yes I do receive counselling - though I'm not sure to the extent that it has helped...to be honest the most helpful thing has been to keep my mind active and busy so I don't focus on irrational thoughts....

But I think it's the guilt that sparks it. And then I keep thinking that I can bring contaminated blood home when I have exposure to someone in the public with a cut or wound. Then I feel that blood 'sticks' But I guess it's no different than handeling money...we have no idea who has handeled it before us and whether their hands were clean etc so I guess there it itself tells me I'm worrying about nothing...

Exactly right,please dont worry because you are fine,I know how scary this is,and i assure you you are ok :) I promise x

Yeah, you have nothing to worry about. If transmission were that easy, HIV would probably have a cure and everyone would be infected. Guilt also plays a huge role in our thoughts and worries. I hope this reassures you a bit
-S-