Martha H
08-05-2005, 04:42 PM
Bill is having a problem with Mom. He thinks she hid or threw out yestarday's pills (she is on 5 prescriptions plus high dose aspirin) and today she objected to them saying, "the doctor said I do not need ANY pills ... maybe just Vitamin C." :rolleyes: Of course no doctor ever said such a thing. He writes to me from Cooperstown Library "MOM is so stubborn! Did you know that!!"
Weeelll, I think I did, but AD has made her irrational and stubborn.
If she stops taking them (mainly heart and circulation pills) what happens then?? What can he do to get her to take them?? With little kids we used to mash them up in applesauce ...
Love,
Martha
Weeelll, I think I did, but AD has made her irrational and stubborn.
If she stops taking them (mainly heart and circulation pills) what happens then?? What can he do to get her to take them?? With little kids we used to mash them up in applesauce ...
Love,
Martha
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LuvMyLilDoggie
08-05-2005, 06:37 PM
I wouldn't mash them since some pills can be mashed and some should never be mashed.
I know we're not supposed to correct them when they say something that's not right but I do when it comes to that. I run into this a LOT with dad. R is going through it now with him. When he tells me he doesn't need the pills anymore, I tell him "Dad, I was with you. The doctor told both of us that you need to take them. If you stop taking these, the doctor will find out and she'll be mad." That usually works. But when it doesn't, I go on to say "You'll wind up in the hospital and I know you don't want to go there."
Since she's willing to take vitamins, perhaps Bill can buy some different vitamins and replace them with her prescriptions. If she thinks she's taking vitamins, she may be willing to take them.
Love, Barb
I know we're not supposed to correct them when they say something that's not right but I do when it comes to that. I run into this a LOT with dad. R is going through it now with him. When he tells me he doesn't need the pills anymore, I tell him "Dad, I was with you. The doctor told both of us that you need to take them. If you stop taking these, the doctor will find out and she'll be mad." That usually works. But when it doesn't, I go on to say "You'll wind up in the hospital and I know you don't want to go there."
Since she's willing to take vitamins, perhaps Bill can buy some different vitamins and replace them with her prescriptions. If she thinks she's taking vitamins, she may be willing to take them.
Love, Barb
Martha H
08-05-2005, 09:39 PM
Thanks Barb.
I think maybe in a day or two she will forget what 'the dctor said' .. and Bill is now alerted to watch out: in case she actually throws them away... (expensive garbage!!!!)
This reminds me of what an old friend once told me (he was a physician): taking a lot of multivitamins and multiminerals has only one effect: VERY expensive urine!!
(Still, I take some ...)
Love,
Martha
I think maybe in a day or two she will forget what 'the dctor said' .. and Bill is now alerted to watch out: in case she actually throws them away... (expensive garbage!!!!)
This reminds me of what an old friend once told me (he was a physician): taking a lot of multivitamins and multiminerals has only one effect: VERY expensive urine!!
(Still, I take some ...)
Love,
Martha
BarbaraH
08-05-2005, 11:28 PM
Hi Martha,
Does Bill give your Mom her medicines or are they in one of those daily dose plastic containers for her to take herself? It no longer safe for your mother to be responsible for any of her medicines. She's done far better than most of the population, but her turn is over!
I'd say the time has come for your mother to see only one dose (the pills she's to take at that time of day) of her pills at a time and be watched while taking them. That's how the aides at the assisted living facility did it for those residents who needed that help. Bill can tell her that the doctor called with the instructions to take them all. Repeat that same process at the time the next pills are to be taken, ad infinitum.
Yep - you knew she was stubborn!! You saw it up close and personal for several years and it got worse and worse over that time. Poor Bill and Anna, but they had a good idea of what they were signing on for. I'll bet they couldn't begin to guess how different your mother's personality was from Anna's mother's personality and how AD would make their behavior differ. Maybe their caregiver roles are far different, too?
If your mother stops taking the medicines, she could be back in congestive heart failure or whatever heart trouble she had. At her advanced age and increasing dementia, it would be questionable whether to be so aggressive with the treatment that was given her several years ago. Sad, but true.
Hope you're still enjoying all the lovely things, adventures, joys, and new friends that your life now holds!
Blessings - Barbara :)
Does Bill give your Mom her medicines or are they in one of those daily dose plastic containers for her to take herself? It no longer safe for your mother to be responsible for any of her medicines. She's done far better than most of the population, but her turn is over!
I'd say the time has come for your mother to see only one dose (the pills she's to take at that time of day) of her pills at a time and be watched while taking them. That's how the aides at the assisted living facility did it for those residents who needed that help. Bill can tell her that the doctor called with the instructions to take them all. Repeat that same process at the time the next pills are to be taken, ad infinitum.
Yep - you knew she was stubborn!! You saw it up close and personal for several years and it got worse and worse over that time. Poor Bill and Anna, but they had a good idea of what they were signing on for. I'll bet they couldn't begin to guess how different your mother's personality was from Anna's mother's personality and how AD would make their behavior differ. Maybe their caregiver roles are far different, too?
If your mother stops taking the medicines, she could be back in congestive heart failure or whatever heart trouble she had. At her advanced age and increasing dementia, it would be questionable whether to be so aggressive with the treatment that was given her several years ago. Sad, but true.
Hope you're still enjoying all the lovely things, adventures, joys, and new friends that your life now holds!
Blessings - Barbara :)
Martha H
08-06-2005, 08:22 AM
Dear Barbara,
Way back in December we started giving Mom only the dose for that meal. I had to leave the house at 6 and she got up about 7, so we just had to hope and pray she would take the pills on a little saucer at her breakfast table. When the HHA noticed the pills were not taken, she made sure Mom took them at 9.
Since Mom has been with Bill, he has put the daily 5 tablets on the table at breakfast and she took them without a hitch. When Mom was at Elsie's house, she saw a bottle of Jack's heart pills on the table and opened the bottle and began taking out a pill. Jack called her from across the room yelling NOOOO Those are mine! Mom was insulted and said But I ALWAYS take a pill out of that container at this time. (She didn't know that her pills were on a little saucer .. every day since December, and by then it was March ..and still Elsie said Mom was completely lucid!!)
Now she decided not to take any more (they all eat breakfast together) and after Bill heard her 'the doctor said ..' story he was at a loss. I think they just skipped them yesterday. In the evening she takes 2 more. I don't know how that went.
I'll speak to him today and tell him "try saying, the doctor just called and said you MUST take them every day or else you have to go to the hospital."
Yes, it's the whole arsenal against heart failure, the beta blocker, the calcium antagonist, a stomach protection drug (incredibly expensive!) a heart strengthener, digitalis (cheap) .. and something else I don't remember - oh yes, a diuretic.. and an aspirin.
I even got the feeling that Mom is tired of living and wants to stop keeping herself alive on drugs, but that thought was rejected after I heard she was swimming again and enjoying life. It's just the disease - she has a false memory of a non existent visit to the doctor who told her to stop taking pills ..she 'remembers' it; she thinks Bill 'forgot' it - and is so sure she is right that she is afraid to keep taking them ...
Poor Mom.
Thanks for your ideas.
I am still having a wonderful life out here! Expecting my first company this weekend, old old friends from 41 years ago in Queens, who then moved to PA and now live near Cleveland. Coming in a RV in which they will probably sleep, parked in our church parking lot. The church is about 10 miles away .. but they will use my car to go to the RV every night and come back in the morning. I don't like to drive at night because I can't see well ...
Love,
Martha
Way back in December we started giving Mom only the dose for that meal. I had to leave the house at 6 and she got up about 7, so we just had to hope and pray she would take the pills on a little saucer at her breakfast table. When the HHA noticed the pills were not taken, she made sure Mom took them at 9.
Since Mom has been with Bill, he has put the daily 5 tablets on the table at breakfast and she took them without a hitch. When Mom was at Elsie's house, she saw a bottle of Jack's heart pills on the table and opened the bottle and began taking out a pill. Jack called her from across the room yelling NOOOO Those are mine! Mom was insulted and said But I ALWAYS take a pill out of that container at this time. (She didn't know that her pills were on a little saucer .. every day since December, and by then it was March ..and still Elsie said Mom was completely lucid!!)
Now she decided not to take any more (they all eat breakfast together) and after Bill heard her 'the doctor said ..' story he was at a loss. I think they just skipped them yesterday. In the evening she takes 2 more. I don't know how that went.
I'll speak to him today and tell him "try saying, the doctor just called and said you MUST take them every day or else you have to go to the hospital."
Yes, it's the whole arsenal against heart failure, the beta blocker, the calcium antagonist, a stomach protection drug (incredibly expensive!) a heart strengthener, digitalis (cheap) .. and something else I don't remember - oh yes, a diuretic.. and an aspirin.
I even got the feeling that Mom is tired of living and wants to stop keeping herself alive on drugs, but that thought was rejected after I heard she was swimming again and enjoying life. It's just the disease - she has a false memory of a non existent visit to the doctor who told her to stop taking pills ..she 'remembers' it; she thinks Bill 'forgot' it - and is so sure she is right that she is afraid to keep taking them ...
Poor Mom.
Thanks for your ideas.
I am still having a wonderful life out here! Expecting my first company this weekend, old old friends from 41 years ago in Queens, who then moved to PA and now live near Cleveland. Coming in a RV in which they will probably sleep, parked in our church parking lot. The church is about 10 miles away .. but they will use my car to go to the RV every night and come back in the morning. I don't like to drive at night because I can't see well ...
Love,
Martha
BarbaraH
08-06-2005, 09:15 AM
Hope you and your old friends have a wonderful time together!
"Make new friends, but keep the old.
One is silver, the other gold!"
Goodness you're rich!!
Hugs - Barbara
"Make new friends, but keep the old.
One is silver, the other gold!"
Goodness you're rich!!
Hugs - Barbara