autismmom3
08-22-2005, 01:48 AM
I have to say that I have never been so lost and out of control in my entire life. I am a mother of 3: Calista 4, Chase 3, and Spencer 5 months. Chase was diagnosed hf-autistic in this past July. He has been in the EarlyOn program for almost a year now in the beginning just for a speech delay. He is still completely nonverbal except for ma, da, and a very high pitched scream! I joined the message board hoping to get help from mothers and fathers who have been there and are there now because I am lost. I have so many different people telling me what I should do and how I should do it and he funny thing is it is never pertains to the problems we are experiencing. Chase doesn't eat, doesn't sleep and screams 95% of the day, usually for no reason at all. He starts school for half day in a week but it isn't an AI room, it is basically for his language issues although the teacher has worked with autistic children before. People say yes to ABA therapy but the school says no. He has no interest in the toliet or even in a spoon he figures thats what fingers are for. Did I mention he is very violent and sometimes just plain mean. The program he is in said that he would be seen by an OT but it hasn't happened and I know for a fact he needs one. If there is anyone that could help lead me in the right direction for beginning to get some help for my son I would greatly appreciate it. :confused:
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lillyfire25
08-22-2005, 04:51 AM
I wonder why the school says no to ABA??!! Did they give you a reason why?
There are alot of programs out there that help. They do vary from state to state.... what state do you live in? Some states have programs that pay for intensive services. Our son is HFA and will be starting intensive in-home therapy next month.
Your son sounds like how my son was at his age. I figured out that he was very sensitive to MY emotions, and when I was feeling frustrated and at my wits end (which was 90% of the time) he responded negativley. I made myself relax and talk slowly and calmly even when I wanted to scream! The more you do this, the more you will actually FEEL more relaxed and calm, and it was at this point that Jacob would relax. It is hard at first, but it is scary to kids (even non-autistic children) when they feel like the situation is out of control. It may be something to try....
There are alot of people on this board who have excellent advice and are here to support you. You are definitly not alone! :wave:
There are alot of programs out there that help. They do vary from state to state.... what state do you live in? Some states have programs that pay for intensive services. Our son is HFA and will be starting intensive in-home therapy next month.
Your son sounds like how my son was at his age. I figured out that he was very sensitive to MY emotions, and when I was feeling frustrated and at my wits end (which was 90% of the time) he responded negativley. I made myself relax and talk slowly and calmly even when I wanted to scream! The more you do this, the more you will actually FEEL more relaxed and calm, and it was at this point that Jacob would relax. It is hard at first, but it is scary to kids (even non-autistic children) when they feel like the situation is out of control. It may be something to try....
There are alot of people on this board who have excellent advice and are here to support you. You are definitly not alone! :wave:
lillyfire25
08-22-2005, 04:56 AM
One more thing.....
I worried alot about my son not eating too.... but the reality is, he's not going to starve himself. Let him eat what he likes, and offer a little portion of something new with each meal. With potty training, our son is 4 and is still in diapers.... it will come with time! It's hard to toilet train when they don't understand the concept....
I would definitly look into ABA. That is just my opinion. There are other therapies out there that work well for children.
I worried alot about my son not eating too.... but the reality is, he's not going to starve himself. Let him eat what he likes, and offer a little portion of something new with each meal. With potty training, our son is 4 and is still in diapers.... it will come with time! It's hard to toilet train when they don't understand the concept....
I would definitly look into ABA. That is just my opinion. There are other therapies out there that work well for children.
glsmom
08-22-2005, 09:38 AM
Hello I would bet alot of people on this board have been where you are at right now so take comfort that you are not alone even though I am sure it feels like it. The truth is no professional or family member no matter how good their intention knows what it is like caring for these children unless they have a child on the spectrum that they raised 24-7. So take what people say with a grain of salt. My daughter just turned four. She was acting simlular to your son about one and half years ago. We were told everything from she was just spoiled to she really not that bad by friends and family members. I was near nevous breakdown by the time we actually got some help. She never slept and I am not exagerating I think she litterally would sleep about two four hours in a 24 hour period. She screamed 80% of the day and many other behaviors that were less than desirable. So there is the bad here is the good she four now and her negative Autisic behaviors have significantly decreased. Have you heard of the Gluten free Casien free diet? We saw significant changes in the first few weeks of the diet we started by taking all dairy out of her diet. She started sleeping she quit being so aggressive. She started to potty train. Then we removed sugar and wheat products. With that she started putting words together and stopped crying as much I think because she replaced some of that screaming with actual communication. It is a little spendy and inconvient but the advantages out wiegh that. I hope it helps hang in there. Good Luck :wave:
Al & Matt's Mom
08-22-2005, 10:38 AM
I have to agree with glsmom. My son is PDD, and never exhibited any of the stereotypical behaviors. Shortly after his 3rd birthday, he began to scream all of the time and to flap his hands and walk on tiptoe. After giving it a lot of thought, we realized that he had recently begun drinking a lot of milk. We stopped giving him any milk and within 3 days the screaming, hand flapping and toe walking was gone. When we removed dairy from all of his food, he began to speak in sentences (he had been close to sentences before, but seemed unable to make the leap). He also began to potty train. It was as if he just wasn't getting the signals that he needed to go while on the milk. We are now GFCF for 5 months and have had tremendous gains. Please consider trying this, the statistics say that 80% of ASD children benefit from it.
KathleenW
08-22-2005, 11:27 AM
When we took all milk from my son's diet he went from 25 words to over 200 in one month. We also gave him 50mg of B6, 250mg of magnesium and DMG every day (DMG really reduced his frustration level). When he was not on DMG every time he got mad he would slap his face. Within a week of using DMG he stopped hitting himself. Every time he hit himself I thought I would have a nervous break down.
IF your school does not use ABA I would suggest you start up your own program out of your house. It is very expensive, but worth every cent. My husband was out of a job the first year we were doing ABA so it was very hard. My son will start Kindergarten this Friday with no assistance.
I can not imagine being you with two other children. It took every waking second of the day to focus on my one child and his needs. I will hope for the best for you and your family.
P.S. I like the names you chose for your children. Very Cute!!!
IF your school does not use ABA I would suggest you start up your own program out of your house. It is very expensive, but worth every cent. My husband was out of a job the first year we were doing ABA so it was very hard. My son will start Kindergarten this Friday with no assistance.
I can not imagine being you with two other children. It took every waking second of the day to focus on my one child and his needs. I will hope for the best for you and your family.
P.S. I like the names you chose for your children. Very Cute!!!
claste
08-22-2005, 02:40 PM
hi, welcome to the board, their are so many interventions that it will take a while to get your head round them, its really trial and error, what works with one child doesn,t work with another, do lots of research and decide whats best to fit in with your family, many parents do a mixture of different therapies but they tailor it to their childs needs and they do what can realistically fit in with their family, for dietary information a DAN dr, can point you in the right direction, they will tell you if their are any intolerances they take away the guess work on your behalf, my advice would be to look at some therapys and interventions and research the ones that interest you, then go for it. its hard as we've got to find our own way ourselves and thats scary! good luck, and you will make the right decisions us mums know best.