angel_bear
08-24-2005, 02:20 AM
Today I volunteered again at the NICE nursing home (NICE being the operative word, they spoil their charges rotten .. it's so nice to see) and I got to take one lovely germany/austrian lady for a walk about the gardens in her wheelchair. Then we took her and another gentleman outside, but it was too windy, so we came back in pretty quickly. I settled my lovely german woman, re-brushed her hair and went to another ward where I played Ball with 5 of the residents. One gentleman can hardly talk, prefers the wheelchair to walking, he's not at all what you would call 'alert', but bring a ball into play and WOW !! What a difference!! I worked up quite a sweat actually! They had me hopping. We had a fun time until my gentleman kept the balls .. !! LOL
After that, I went to another wing and handed out some mail, and then played cards with another gentleman who was 6 foot 5 inches high!! He didn't know how to play cards, so we started with Snap. He won (with some encouragement) 2 games out of 3. He made sure I won the 3rd. He was such a gentleman! Then we played memory (with alot of prompting of --- pick up THAT card .. yes.. oh look, you have a pair!!) .. he loved it too. I said "I'll see you in a couple of weeks" and he said "oh, I'll be home by then, this is a lovely resort" ..
LOL LOL LOL .. ok .. he was on holidays in his world!! After that, I went back to the wing I played Ball in and assisted with lunch! I handed out meals and cutlery and drinks, and spoon fed one poor soul who is in a comfy lay-back chair, and all she can do is call out 'help'. But by golly she had an appetite on her! I found a resident I know there, that's such a shame, she was a great character 20 years ago, and now, she's a feisty cranky character! The staff were all so patient with her .. even when she tried to tell one to "PI$$ off", and then pulled her pants down in the corner of the room to squat ... she got well and truly rushed off to her room where she argued !! LOL .. poor sausage . she would hate knowing she's like this.
After that, I left, and visited FIL at his nursing home. Talk about a huge difference. We really need to get him moved ... the nursing home won't let me bring in hot meals for FIL anymore now .. he's screaming blue murder. It's against their protocols and principles of their operation to allow a resident to eat food not prepared on the premises. They cannot be held responsible for other peoples food. FIL and I said ]"fine, we'll sign a waver" [/I] .. but nope, we couldn't do that either. We're working on a way to 'buck the system', (other than that, the more difficult he is, the sooner he might be moved?)
Now this morning, Cameron ran down to remind MIL she was going 'out with the ladies on the bus' again this morning (because she went on Monday too) and she looked at Cameron like he was going nuts, and shrugged and kept wandering around. So Cameron tried to remind her .. and she just huffed and kept walking. He gave up (he learns quickly .. don't push Nanna!!) and came upstairs. OH well we thought .. nothing we can do ... the bus turned up at 9.15am (late!!!!) and nope, she wasn't ready !! She went charging down the hallway to get shoes and a jacket .. and finally went out the front door! She came home early too at 2.15 which is unusual too. Short day for some reason.
When she was gone however, I took my trusty new digital camera and took some photo's that needed to be taken. The 2 casks of wine and the bottle of wine at her feet in the loungeroom. The wine stained carpet. The left over food in a stocking in a drawer. The soggy food I don't recognise in the cupboard. The wine bottle under the sink (stashed???), the dirty plate and pair of underpants in the cupboard ......... the UNDIES stashed everywhere except the bedroom (LOL). The mess of her room and the other bedroom (she was always a neat fanatic) ........ time to start logging this mess. Only one complaint: I can't take photo's of the smell of urine .. cause it STINKS down there!! Anyway .. why am I logging?
Because ACAT rang me the other night to tell me that there are "heaps" of respite beds at ANOTHER nursing home and that they think MIL would fit in their nicely. ACAT wanted to know if the China BIL turned up. When I said he had, for 3 days, she said "BIL KNEW I wanted to talk to the other brother, he's ignored me AGAIN" and I said "yup, your learning" and she was ANGRY .. and she said "What did China BIL say about his mother?" and I said I had asked him the same question and got the answer back "Except for no speech, she's doing really well, I think she's fine".
That just set ACAT off again on a tirade. They asked me what do I do now? And I said "I feed her 1 meal at night, we drive her wherever she wants to go and take her to visit FIL and Church and stuff, and we do all the behind the scenes stuff - laundry, cleaning up her messes etc etc" I also told ACAT about the 3 days of tablets in one day, and she said "Do you have proof?" and I said "yeah .. the chemist" and she said 'GREAT' ... So I don't know what she has planned, but she AGREES with me that the family (not us) is putting MIL in DANGER voluntarily .............
and they're NOT HAPPY.
I just said "Do what needs to be done" .............. so we'll see what happens (but let's not hold our breaths .. we've been through this before)
And it's only 3.20pm !!!!
Time to get dinner ready ... chopping up chicken thighs for Satay Chicken tonight. Yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Hugs all
Sally
After that, I went to another wing and handed out some mail, and then played cards with another gentleman who was 6 foot 5 inches high!! He didn't know how to play cards, so we started with Snap. He won (with some encouragement) 2 games out of 3. He made sure I won the 3rd. He was such a gentleman! Then we played memory (with alot of prompting of --- pick up THAT card .. yes.. oh look, you have a pair!!) .. he loved it too. I said "I'll see you in a couple of weeks" and he said "oh, I'll be home by then, this is a lovely resort" ..
LOL LOL LOL .. ok .. he was on holidays in his world!! After that, I went back to the wing I played Ball in and assisted with lunch! I handed out meals and cutlery and drinks, and spoon fed one poor soul who is in a comfy lay-back chair, and all she can do is call out 'help'. But by golly she had an appetite on her! I found a resident I know there, that's such a shame, she was a great character 20 years ago, and now, she's a feisty cranky character! The staff were all so patient with her .. even when she tried to tell one to "PI$$ off", and then pulled her pants down in the corner of the room to squat ... she got well and truly rushed off to her room where she argued !! LOL .. poor sausage . she would hate knowing she's like this.
After that, I left, and visited FIL at his nursing home. Talk about a huge difference. We really need to get him moved ... the nursing home won't let me bring in hot meals for FIL anymore now .. he's screaming blue murder. It's against their protocols and principles of their operation to allow a resident to eat food not prepared on the premises. They cannot be held responsible for other peoples food. FIL and I said ]"fine, we'll sign a waver" [/I] .. but nope, we couldn't do that either. We're working on a way to 'buck the system', (other than that, the more difficult he is, the sooner he might be moved?)
Now this morning, Cameron ran down to remind MIL she was going 'out with the ladies on the bus' again this morning (because she went on Monday too) and she looked at Cameron like he was going nuts, and shrugged and kept wandering around. So Cameron tried to remind her .. and she just huffed and kept walking. He gave up (he learns quickly .. don't push Nanna!!) and came upstairs. OH well we thought .. nothing we can do ... the bus turned up at 9.15am (late!!!!) and nope, she wasn't ready !! She went charging down the hallway to get shoes and a jacket .. and finally went out the front door! She came home early too at 2.15 which is unusual too. Short day for some reason.
When she was gone however, I took my trusty new digital camera and took some photo's that needed to be taken. The 2 casks of wine and the bottle of wine at her feet in the loungeroom. The wine stained carpet. The left over food in a stocking in a drawer. The soggy food I don't recognise in the cupboard. The wine bottle under the sink (stashed???), the dirty plate and pair of underpants in the cupboard ......... the UNDIES stashed everywhere except the bedroom (LOL). The mess of her room and the other bedroom (she was always a neat fanatic) ........ time to start logging this mess. Only one complaint: I can't take photo's of the smell of urine .. cause it STINKS down there!! Anyway .. why am I logging?
Because ACAT rang me the other night to tell me that there are "heaps" of respite beds at ANOTHER nursing home and that they think MIL would fit in their nicely. ACAT wanted to know if the China BIL turned up. When I said he had, for 3 days, she said "BIL KNEW I wanted to talk to the other brother, he's ignored me AGAIN" and I said "yup, your learning" and she was ANGRY .. and she said "What did China BIL say about his mother?" and I said I had asked him the same question and got the answer back "Except for no speech, she's doing really well, I think she's fine".
That just set ACAT off again on a tirade. They asked me what do I do now? And I said "I feed her 1 meal at night, we drive her wherever she wants to go and take her to visit FIL and Church and stuff, and we do all the behind the scenes stuff - laundry, cleaning up her messes etc etc" I also told ACAT about the 3 days of tablets in one day, and she said "Do you have proof?" and I said "yeah .. the chemist" and she said 'GREAT' ... So I don't know what she has planned, but she AGREES with me that the family (not us) is putting MIL in DANGER voluntarily .............
and they're NOT HAPPY.
I just said "Do what needs to be done" .............. so we'll see what happens (but let's not hold our breaths .. we've been through this before)
And it's only 3.20pm !!!!
Time to get dinner ready ... chopping up chicken thighs for Satay Chicken tonight. Yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Hugs all
Sally
Sponsor
BarbaraH
08-24-2005, 10:09 AM
Hi Sally,
WHEW!!!!! Your day would exhaust a marathoner!
I so hope ACAT can shake up the works and get MIL the care she needs. This could really be good news! Can FIL go to the same facility? That would simplify things, perhaps.
Keep snapping those photos and date them. You never know how they'll be needed.
Sending many hugs and wishes for all the best! Busy here, so must get to it!
((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))) )))))))) Barbara :)
WHEW!!!!! Your day would exhaust a marathoner!
I so hope ACAT can shake up the works and get MIL the care she needs. This could really be good news! Can FIL go to the same facility? That would simplify things, perhaps.
Keep snapping those photos and date them. You never know how they'll be needed.
Sending many hugs and wishes for all the best! Busy here, so must get to it!
((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))) )))))))) Barbara :)
ToBeFreeToRoam
08-25-2005, 01:29 AM
Hi Sally,
That sounds like a really nice nursing home where you volunteer. I am sure they love having you there (the patients and the staff)! Is this just because, or part of your schooling? Is it only an AD place or both? How long can the other (not nice) nursing home, make FIL stay? You do need to try and do something to make them let him move!
I am so glad you got a chance to take the pics. Yes, do make sure you label them, as to what they are and the date. That should help make the correct decisions! It sounds like there is hope for MILs future in a safe place.
Take care and dont wear yourself out! Wannabe
That sounds like a really nice nursing home where you volunteer. I am sure they love having you there (the patients and the staff)! Is this just because, or part of your schooling? Is it only an AD place or both? How long can the other (not nice) nursing home, make FIL stay? You do need to try and do something to make them let him move!
I am so glad you got a chance to take the pics. Yes, do make sure you label them, as to what they are and the date. That should help make the correct decisions! It sounds like there is hope for MILs future in a safe place.
Take care and dont wear yourself out! Wannabe
angel_bear
08-25-2005, 05:24 AM
Oh it's scary .. tonight Cameron took her dinner down, and found her attempting to eat some bread ..............................
Which would be fine except she had spread laundry detergent all over it and was trying to eat it .............
DH said she was having an 'off' day .. he doesn't know how right he was !!
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Anyway .. theory is, if FIL is difficult enough, the not so nice nursing home will happily get rid of him to another home. I also have his name down at 3 other nursing homes, and, if I get a moment tomorrow, might put his name down at another one (where hopefully MIL might get some respite care) ..
And I'm doing the volunteer thing because a) I want to b) it helps with my schooling (not officially however) and c) it makes "L" look bad .. LOL LOL LOL and d) it get's my name known and *fingers crossed* FIL's name known and if they know how miserable he is and how horrible the nursing home is, they might shuffle him in a bit faster.
Can't hurt ... LOL
Ok .. doing dinner .. Tuna Casserole tonight
Hugs
Sally
Which would be fine except she had spread laundry detergent all over it and was trying to eat it .............
DH said she was having an 'off' day .. he doesn't know how right he was !!
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Anyway .. theory is, if FIL is difficult enough, the not so nice nursing home will happily get rid of him to another home. I also have his name down at 3 other nursing homes, and, if I get a moment tomorrow, might put his name down at another one (where hopefully MIL might get some respite care) ..
And I'm doing the volunteer thing because a) I want to b) it helps with my schooling (not officially however) and c) it makes "L" look bad .. LOL LOL LOL and d) it get's my name known and *fingers crossed* FIL's name known and if they know how miserable he is and how horrible the nursing home is, they might shuffle him in a bit faster.
Can't hurt ... LOL
Ok .. doing dinner .. Tuna Casserole tonight
Hugs
Sally
BarbaraH
08-25-2005, 03:17 PM
Oh, dear,
I guess it's time to lock up the detergents and poisons like you would child-proof your home for a toddler. If MIL ate much of it, she'd be likely to have the runs or worse. If there's bleach in the detergent, she could be in real trouble, but I think she'd have acted like she was in pain - throat, stomach burning and such. Tell BIL about this and see how he blows it off.
This also means MIL cannot have access to any medicine - not antacids, aspirin, or other OTC meds. as any medicine taken incorrectly can be a hazzard. How sad.
I hope FIL can be moved to a better, happier, sunnier, and less controling place soon, especially if MIL can be there, too. The place you volunteer sounds great! I had to laugh at the gentleman's comment that he was on holiday. My mother thought the locked unit she was in was a cruise ship: she had a roommate (also had one on a cruise to Alaska, so a reasonable conclusion) and you couldn't get out. It didn't occur to Mom that somehow I got onto the ship and that the scenery outside didn't change at all! Oh, well, you just have to laugh!
In all of your pleasant and other busy-ness, take time for yourself, to rest, read, sleep, and relax.
We almost had Tuna Casserole last night, too, but the noodles had been used up.
Hugs, Barbara :)
I guess it's time to lock up the detergents and poisons like you would child-proof your home for a toddler. If MIL ate much of it, she'd be likely to have the runs or worse. If there's bleach in the detergent, she could be in real trouble, but I think she'd have acted like she was in pain - throat, stomach burning and such. Tell BIL about this and see how he blows it off.
This also means MIL cannot have access to any medicine - not antacids, aspirin, or other OTC meds. as any medicine taken incorrectly can be a hazzard. How sad.
I hope FIL can be moved to a better, happier, sunnier, and less controling place soon, especially if MIL can be there, too. The place you volunteer sounds great! I had to laugh at the gentleman's comment that he was on holiday. My mother thought the locked unit she was in was a cruise ship: she had a roommate (also had one on a cruise to Alaska, so a reasonable conclusion) and you couldn't get out. It didn't occur to Mom that somehow I got onto the ship and that the scenery outside didn't change at all! Oh, well, you just have to laugh!
In all of your pleasant and other busy-ness, take time for yourself, to rest, read, sleep, and relax.
We almost had Tuna Casserole last night, too, but the noodles had been used up.
Hugs, Barbara :)
angel_bear
08-25-2005, 07:35 PM
OH dear, MIL has been a busy girl throughout the night / morning.
The Day Care Bus turned up again this morning!! Looks like BIL organised them to do the Monday, Wednesday, Friday run. Pity he didn't tell us about it so we could prime her .. but never mind ... communication isn't his strong point anymore. We like living in the dark .... bit like a mushroom really .....
Anyway .. MIL knocked back the bus cause she's 'busy busy' .. and what's she doing?
Rearranging all the furniture. The rocking chair is in the foyer with a small table in front of it, she's pulling FIL's stuff apart (is this her way of saying don't come home?) and .. well, it looks like a bit of a disaster downstairs ! LOL
I'll wait until DH takes her to see FIL and go and investigate today's events ...
and its only 8.34am !! I've got some pain pills ready for her this afternoon, cause her back is really going to hurt!!
Cheers all
Sally
The Day Care Bus turned up again this morning!! Looks like BIL organised them to do the Monday, Wednesday, Friday run. Pity he didn't tell us about it so we could prime her .. but never mind ... communication isn't his strong point anymore. We like living in the dark .... bit like a mushroom really .....
Anyway .. MIL knocked back the bus cause she's 'busy busy' .. and what's she doing?
Rearranging all the furniture. The rocking chair is in the foyer with a small table in front of it, she's pulling FIL's stuff apart (is this her way of saying don't come home?) and .. well, it looks like a bit of a disaster downstairs ! LOL
I'll wait until DH takes her to see FIL and go and investigate today's events ...
and its only 8.34am !! I've got some pain pills ready for her this afternoon, cause her back is really going to hurt!!
Cheers all
Sally
angel_bear
08-25-2005, 10:07 PM
Nope, I'm wrong, the rocking chair BELONGS in the foyer apparently (!!!!) with it's own little table .. and the electric kettle (sans base) BELONGS under the coffee table and the lemon fizzy drink BELONGS in the corner.
Uh huh .... but .......... she's happy !!!!!!!!!!! So I'm not gonna cross her. She doesn't want to see FIL today either, so she's downstairs watching TV now ...
Good thing I've got a lot of laundry to do .. I can check on her. She's having a "don't know" day today (is that dirty? I don't know. Is your back hurting? I don't know)
Hugs
Sally
Uh huh .... but .......... she's happy !!!!!!!!!!! So I'm not gonna cross her. She doesn't want to see FIL today either, so she's downstairs watching TV now ...
Good thing I've got a lot of laundry to do .. I can check on her. She's having a "don't know" day today (is that dirty? I don't know. Is your back hurting? I don't know)
Hugs
Sally
ToBeFreeToRoam
08-26-2005, 01:23 AM
Hi Sally,
It sounds like you are having a really fun time today and last nite! I do not know how you do it. I would have trouble, not butting in and telling her, that that does not go there, and this should be here and do not eat that, it is bad.
You know it makes me think. My dad, even in his slightly earlier stage than your MIL, he gets days or parts of a day, where he gets lots of energy or maybe just an idea in his head that he HAS to act on. His is throwing out papers in the file (some of which I need), which he thinks we do not need. The file IS crowded?! And doing odds and ends of yard work (mostly busy and not helpful). I guess it makes him feel useful. He cannot ride the lawnmower anymore (my mom does it), cause he got off of it when it was in gear and it started driving away without him!! But he still takes "care" of the riding lawn mower.
I guess there went your chance to take more pics of the disaster down stairs. Maybe tomorrow! By the way, what does "LOL", mean???
Take care, Wannabe
It sounds like you are having a really fun time today and last nite! I do not know how you do it. I would have trouble, not butting in and telling her, that that does not go there, and this should be here and do not eat that, it is bad.
You know it makes me think. My dad, even in his slightly earlier stage than your MIL, he gets days or parts of a day, where he gets lots of energy or maybe just an idea in his head that he HAS to act on. His is throwing out papers in the file (some of which I need), which he thinks we do not need. The file IS crowded?! And doing odds and ends of yard work (mostly busy and not helpful). I guess it makes him feel useful. He cannot ride the lawnmower anymore (my mom does it), cause he got off of it when it was in gear and it started driving away without him!! But he still takes "care" of the riding lawn mower.
I guess there went your chance to take more pics of the disaster down stairs. Maybe tomorrow! By the way, what does "LOL", mean???
Take care, Wannabe
angel_bear
08-26-2005, 06:00 AM
OK .. LOL means Laughing Out Loud (or similar variations of LOL) .. and LMHO means Laughing my head off .. and IMHO means In My Humble Opinion and BTW means By The Way .. and ummm .. that'll do for Internet Language 101 for today !!! (LOL)
Talk about a day of disasters!!
First, she was very fuzzy this morning, so I'm almost certain she didn't go to bed last night. She didn't want to visit FIL this morning, didn't even mention going out. FIL however, decided to come home for a few hours this afternoon, and SHE WAS NOT HAPPY. She roused on him !!! When it was time for him to leave, she popped herself into the car! She was going too! Church envelope and all !! (Yes, today is Friday btw) FIL was going to the club for a couple of beers before returning to his 'hell-hole' (his words, not mine LOL) and she was going too!! I joined them a little while later (after picking up MIL's next weeks med's) and she was sitting at the table with 'the lads' having a Chardonnay. As they finished their beer, she shot the rest of the wine down her throat, and started wandering, with glass, towards the front door of the club! I bolted and got her hand, and led her back to the bar. Then this man came up to me and told me she had left her handbag at another table, and he had seen someone pick it up and take it to reception! YIKES !!! I managed to get it thankfully, and returned it to her. She looked at it like it was something new, but a little while later, shuffled through the handbag and came up with a $100 note!!!!
For someone who didn't have petrol money the other day and HASN'T been to the bank .. where did THAT come from???
Anyway, she had another wine, and drank that REALLY quickly, and started falling asleep at the table!! I ended up bringing her home .. she could hardly walk!! Remember, this woman DOES drink a lot, and should have more tolerance than two wines!!! And yes, she's taken her proper dose of medication today, AND she's eaten OK as well ....
It's all smacking of no sleep last night !!! But I continue .........
so I get her home, and settle her into her chair, and dash upstairs and finish cooking her dinner, and organise a sleepover for tomorrow night, and send Cameron downstairs with her dinner .. and a few moments later, Cameron comes back upstairs. Eyes wide. Skin Pale.
"What's up" I ask
"Nanna's getting changed in the loungeroom"
"What did you see?" I ask
"Nothing, the plate was in the way and I backed out of the room"
"Good lad" I replied
And went and investigated ....................
And there she is, on her bottom inbetween her lounge chair and the coffee table, no pants, and one really wet soggy jumper on. 2 pairs of undies and 2 pairs of trousers, obviously soiled scattered on the floor, and a HUGE puddle of soft drink as well.
I'm not even going to try and figure out what happened .. I just went into damage control.
Got the wet top off, with her arguing it wasn't wet, managed to get a dry one on. Found some dry tracksuit pants, put them on her with her saying "why" every 2 seconds. Sat her down with a spoon for dinner, settled her .. and came back upstairs.
Started typing this.
Heard a thump
Went and investigated .. she was on the lounge (3 seater) struggling to get up. She had poured her wine onto her dinner plate, and put food in her wine glass. She finally got up and was peeking out the curtains. I tried to dry up the soft drink mess, and she kept putting her shoes on the towel I was using.
I said "I think it's time you went to bed"
and she said
"yes"
So I half carried her to the toilet and got her in there to do her business, while I pulled her bed down. She staggered into her room, and tried to pull her bed up!! So we had a 'gentle persuasion' of getting into bed UNDER the covers (that worked) .. managed to get her to give up on the idea of putting cotton Pyjamas (too cold anyway) I tucked her in, turned off her light, and left her all cosy.
Sheesh!!!!
What an afternoon/evening!! I'll have to keep checking on her, because she actually ended up in bed at 6.35pm .. which is early, but if she really had no sleep last night, I'm surprised she lasted this long!!
OK >>>> time for a drink for ME I think !!! Phew!!
Hugs all
Sally
Talk about a day of disasters!!
First, she was very fuzzy this morning, so I'm almost certain she didn't go to bed last night. She didn't want to visit FIL this morning, didn't even mention going out. FIL however, decided to come home for a few hours this afternoon, and SHE WAS NOT HAPPY. She roused on him !!! When it was time for him to leave, she popped herself into the car! She was going too! Church envelope and all !! (Yes, today is Friday btw) FIL was going to the club for a couple of beers before returning to his 'hell-hole' (his words, not mine LOL) and she was going too!! I joined them a little while later (after picking up MIL's next weeks med's) and she was sitting at the table with 'the lads' having a Chardonnay. As they finished their beer, she shot the rest of the wine down her throat, and started wandering, with glass, towards the front door of the club! I bolted and got her hand, and led her back to the bar. Then this man came up to me and told me she had left her handbag at another table, and he had seen someone pick it up and take it to reception! YIKES !!! I managed to get it thankfully, and returned it to her. She looked at it like it was something new, but a little while later, shuffled through the handbag and came up with a $100 note!!!!
For someone who didn't have petrol money the other day and HASN'T been to the bank .. where did THAT come from???
Anyway, she had another wine, and drank that REALLY quickly, and started falling asleep at the table!! I ended up bringing her home .. she could hardly walk!! Remember, this woman DOES drink a lot, and should have more tolerance than two wines!!! And yes, she's taken her proper dose of medication today, AND she's eaten OK as well ....
It's all smacking of no sleep last night !!! But I continue .........
so I get her home, and settle her into her chair, and dash upstairs and finish cooking her dinner, and organise a sleepover for tomorrow night, and send Cameron downstairs with her dinner .. and a few moments later, Cameron comes back upstairs. Eyes wide. Skin Pale.
"What's up" I ask
"Nanna's getting changed in the loungeroom"
"What did you see?" I ask
"Nothing, the plate was in the way and I backed out of the room"
"Good lad" I replied
And went and investigated ....................
And there she is, on her bottom inbetween her lounge chair and the coffee table, no pants, and one really wet soggy jumper on. 2 pairs of undies and 2 pairs of trousers, obviously soiled scattered on the floor, and a HUGE puddle of soft drink as well.
I'm not even going to try and figure out what happened .. I just went into damage control.
Got the wet top off, with her arguing it wasn't wet, managed to get a dry one on. Found some dry tracksuit pants, put them on her with her saying "why" every 2 seconds. Sat her down with a spoon for dinner, settled her .. and came back upstairs.
Started typing this.
Heard a thump
Went and investigated .. she was on the lounge (3 seater) struggling to get up. She had poured her wine onto her dinner plate, and put food in her wine glass. She finally got up and was peeking out the curtains. I tried to dry up the soft drink mess, and she kept putting her shoes on the towel I was using.
I said "I think it's time you went to bed"
and she said
"yes"
So I half carried her to the toilet and got her in there to do her business, while I pulled her bed down. She staggered into her room, and tried to pull her bed up!! So we had a 'gentle persuasion' of getting into bed UNDER the covers (that worked) .. managed to get her to give up on the idea of putting cotton Pyjamas (too cold anyway) I tucked her in, turned off her light, and left her all cosy.
Sheesh!!!!
What an afternoon/evening!! I'll have to keep checking on her, because she actually ended up in bed at 6.35pm .. which is early, but if she really had no sleep last night, I'm surprised she lasted this long!!
OK >>>> time for a drink for ME I think !!! Phew!!
Hugs all
Sally
Shays mom
08-26-2005, 01:29 PM
Sally, you certainly have a lot going on. I hope FIL gets to a quieter, happier place soon. You need roller skates to keep up with MIL. btw, you can call me "Deb".
BarbaraH
08-26-2005, 02:27 PM
Hi Sally,
It seems to me that your MIL is declining at a faster rate in the last month or so. Does it seem that way to you? Her behavior and actions are increasingly endangering herself and you cannot be at her elbow constantly. Where would you put her in the 7 stages now?
BILs be hanged, this is really awful. I know I'm preaching to the choir here, but you should wave a red flag at ACAT immediately. Tell them about the bread and detergent, the increased drinking with climbing on furniture, falls, messes of all kinds, food handling, and disrobing. She needs help!
Hope Cameron wasn't traumatized for life!! There's a reason little old ladies live with little old men! lol!!!!
Hope you can enjoy your weekend!
Hugs - Barbara :D
It seems to me that your MIL is declining at a faster rate in the last month or so. Does it seem that way to you? Her behavior and actions are increasingly endangering herself and you cannot be at her elbow constantly. Where would you put her in the 7 stages now?
BILs be hanged, this is really awful. I know I'm preaching to the choir here, but you should wave a red flag at ACAT immediately. Tell them about the bread and detergent, the increased drinking with climbing on furniture, falls, messes of all kinds, food handling, and disrobing. She needs help!
Hope Cameron wasn't traumatized for life!! There's a reason little old ladies live with little old men! lol!!!!
Hope you can enjoy your weekend!
Hugs - Barbara :D
Martha H
08-26-2005, 06:15 PM
Dear Sally, Barbara is absolutely right, MIL is showing signs of an ever increasing, accelerated decline. Does your husband know all the things you report here? If so, he has to contact his brothers and tell tham what HE has seen (since they don't seem to want to believe you.)
This is my fear for you: MIL falls and gets so badly injured that she dies! Or actually eats the detergent, and dies! And then they all say: well, Sally was living with her, why didn't she make sure none of this could happen??
Just for that reason alone I would get out of there before the planned date .. the 2 blind brothers will have her in a nursing home within 2 weeks of your departure ...
Best wishes for a solution NOW!
Love,
Martha
This is my fear for you: MIL falls and gets so badly injured that she dies! Or actually eats the detergent, and dies! And then they all say: well, Sally was living with her, why didn't she make sure none of this could happen??
Just for that reason alone I would get out of there before the planned date .. the 2 blind brothers will have her in a nursing home within 2 weeks of your departure ...
Best wishes for a solution NOW!
Love,
Martha
ToBeFreeToRoam
08-27-2005, 12:27 AM
Hi there Sally,
I hope you had a good drink and an early to bed! I vote for the above 2 ladies ideas and worries, too. Can you not go to or call ACAT and tell more, tell all, and maybe have them come and watch. You know, sort of secret watching?!
You are working your behind off for your MIL and in fact, for the BILs!!! I know you would feel bad if you left her to stay in her own mess, but maybe you should call BIL, next time she does something like that?! I am afraid that your choices are: get ACAT to do something fast, call BIL the next time MIL is looking and acting a great big mess, or move out sooner. If nothing else, you and/or your husband should start looking today for a temporary place to live, just in case! You may have to make a fast escape for you and your familys mental and physical health. I bet that your son does not want to go down there again. Afraid, that he may see his GMa, neeked again!
Breathe deep, in and out. Imagine you and your family are already moved to a place all by yourselves! Take care of you. Wannabe
I hope you had a good drink and an early to bed! I vote for the above 2 ladies ideas and worries, too. Can you not go to or call ACAT and tell more, tell all, and maybe have them come and watch. You know, sort of secret watching?!
You are working your behind off for your MIL and in fact, for the BILs!!! I know you would feel bad if you left her to stay in her own mess, but maybe you should call BIL, next time she does something like that?! I am afraid that your choices are: get ACAT to do something fast, call BIL the next time MIL is looking and acting a great big mess, or move out sooner. If nothing else, you and/or your husband should start looking today for a temporary place to live, just in case! You may have to make a fast escape for you and your familys mental and physical health. I bet that your son does not want to go down there again. Afraid, that he may see his GMa, neeked again!
Breathe deep, in and out. Imagine you and your family are already moved to a place all by yourselves! Take care of you. Wannabe
angel_bear
08-27-2005, 12:37 AM
Yes girls, it worries me too that's she's going to do something REALLY bad for her .. she's just acting so bizarre at the moment!!
I can't call BIL .. he's gone flying until Tuesday. God forbid "L" takes a peek at her, I know she won't so I shouldn't even go there should I?
Financially Wannabe, we can't leave here now until the end of the year. However, by the end of September, I will be informing everybody that we will be moving to Queensland. That'll give them 3 MONTHS to work out something else. If they don't, then I can honestly say I did my best and I will walk away with a heavy heart, but I will walk away.
I managed to put the loungeroom back to rights last night, but this morning it's even worse, she's moved the BIGGER furniture out into the hallway and the dining room. You can't walk around anything. She's GOING to hurt herself. If she hurts herself tonight, I will be calling an ambulance and the hospital can have her. I've fussed over her for 2 days straight now .. alcohol induced or not .. she's unstable and deteriorated. Next week she might be fine again .. but the bad is definately outweighing the good for the moment.
Cameron is fine going downstairs, but he's standing at the base of the stairs and calling out to her. He won't be home tonight, he's doing a 12 hour bike ride marathon thingy, so I'll take it down tonight.
Few more drinkies for me tonight, and I won't care either LOL
Big hugs to you all
Sally
I can't call BIL .. he's gone flying until Tuesday. God forbid "L" takes a peek at her, I know she won't so I shouldn't even go there should I?
Financially Wannabe, we can't leave here now until the end of the year. However, by the end of September, I will be informing everybody that we will be moving to Queensland. That'll give them 3 MONTHS to work out something else. If they don't, then I can honestly say I did my best and I will walk away with a heavy heart, but I will walk away.
I managed to put the loungeroom back to rights last night, but this morning it's even worse, she's moved the BIGGER furniture out into the hallway and the dining room. You can't walk around anything. She's GOING to hurt herself. If she hurts herself tonight, I will be calling an ambulance and the hospital can have her. I've fussed over her for 2 days straight now .. alcohol induced or not .. she's unstable and deteriorated. Next week she might be fine again .. but the bad is definately outweighing the good for the moment.
Cameron is fine going downstairs, but he's standing at the base of the stairs and calling out to her. He won't be home tonight, he's doing a 12 hour bike ride marathon thingy, so I'll take it down tonight.
Few more drinkies for me tonight, and I won't care either LOL
Big hugs to you all
Sally
ToBeFreeToRoam
08-27-2005, 01:22 AM
Hi again Sally,
How far away is Queensland! Far enough?! I would not even try to call L, even if she came over or took MIL, she would probably shove it in your face and/or it would be the wrong thing (that she would do)! That is very smart - starting to tell everyone that yall will be gone in 3 mo. Then, they cannot say that yall left them in the lurch!
Your MIL really is unstable right now! Who is to know if it is permanent or just a phase. She might get back to her "normal" self and she might not! This disease is the pits!!! I am not looking forward to when my dad gets to that point! At least he does not drink - hardly any (except for a few special occasions). That makes your MIL even harder to handle. But she is supposed to be free to do what she wants, isnt she?
I am glad that Cameron is alright from the GMa shock from the other nite. He is a good boy, you are a lucky mom!
Take care. Wannabe
How far away is Queensland! Far enough?! I would not even try to call L, even if she came over or took MIL, she would probably shove it in your face and/or it would be the wrong thing (that she would do)! That is very smart - starting to tell everyone that yall will be gone in 3 mo. Then, they cannot say that yall left them in the lurch!
Your MIL really is unstable right now! Who is to know if it is permanent or just a phase. She might get back to her "normal" self and she might not! This disease is the pits!!! I am not looking forward to when my dad gets to that point! At least he does not drink - hardly any (except for a few special occasions). That makes your MIL even harder to handle. But she is supposed to be free to do what she wants, isnt she?
I am glad that Cameron is alright from the GMa shock from the other nite. He is a good boy, you are a lucky mom!
Take care. Wannabe
BarbaraH
08-28-2005, 07:38 PM
Hi Sally,
How goes it? Is MIL still totally out to lunch - more so that her recent usual?? Hope you got in touch with ACAT today while BIL is still away.
Happy escape to school!
Thinking of you! (((Hugs))) Barbara :wave:
How goes it? Is MIL still totally out to lunch - more so that her recent usual?? Hope you got in touch with ACAT today while BIL is still away.
Happy escape to school!
Thinking of you! (((Hugs))) Barbara :wave:
LuvMyLilDoggie
08-28-2005, 09:33 PM
Sally, maybe calling an ambulance is just what's needed. MIL soumds like she's to the point that she may do spmething to herself or the house and the scary thing is you may not fimd out until it's too late. She's lucky you went down there when you did or she may have killed herself with the laundry detergent. Have you told FIL about this?
If she's still acting loopy tonight, call the ambulance and tell all about what's happening there.
What's your favorite drink? I like daqueries of any kind. I love Fuzzy navels but I get indigestion from them. I LOVE watermellon! I could drink a fifth of that myself (although I haveb't done that in years!).
Have to go. Hubby's home with my NyQuil. I've got a killer sinus headache! :(
Love, Barb
If she's still acting loopy tonight, call the ambulance and tell all about what's happening there.
What's your favorite drink? I like daqueries of any kind. I love Fuzzy navels but I get indigestion from them. I LOVE watermellon! I could drink a fifth of that myself (although I haveb't done that in years!).
Have to go. Hubby's home with my NyQuil. I've got a killer sinus headache! :(
Love, Barb